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elementalmag · 2 years

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imperfectly alone

Remember high school, most specifically test days. Omfg. That moment when you read a question and look around in hopes that you’ll meet someone else’s overwhelmed gaze.

You would think that the questions and knowledge from the test is what we took away most from but really, it’s that moment. The moment you felt lost but knew you had no real choice but to either give up or continue through.

If you feel this, you’re clearly not alone gui.

As a 20 smthing myself I can confidently say, that feeling is reoccurring. And don’t let you be actively working on something about yourself, it’s giving AP class vibes with more test moments than normal.

Is this suppose to be reassuring? Or just “yeah life’ll get your ass…. okay byeeee.”

Well, we did the latter so let’s try some reassurance. Uh… I went outside today. So that’s a thing. Sheesh this is harder than expected. Lol. Hey.

Yesterday I had this weird feeling that never really got explained so I just allowed myself to let the feeling ride out and not force myself out my comfort zone. Which usually I would be hard as sht on myself, you know the whole “YOU’RE GOING TO GO OUT AND YOU’RE GOING TO HAVE A FANTASTIC DAY!” but then i’m like “But it’s hot out there and I feel weird”

So I sat in, still got ready for the day of course. But that day was spent on the couch like a teenager staying home from school. Felt really refreshing honestly, I just needed that break. And not just from working but from adulting as a whole. (I don’t like that word but hey when you need it you need it)

Today, I woke up from a dream full of thrills, a perfectly landed plane by yours truly, and chilling with a women who me at any age thinks looked dope asf. The meaning of all that is for me to live with but it woke me up to a world of truths that my teenage self has been wanting conscious me to know.

Today I’ve been embodying these truths and come to realize that that nice polite behavior my child self was taught in order to be treated well isn’t my truth. I’m a 20 smthing now, I will be respected simply by being my most authentic self.

Simple Facts of Life by a wandering 20 smthing

I have no obligation to be extra respectful and nice to anyone in the hopes of receiving a fraction of that respect back.

I have no obligation to appear in a cute nice and “respectable” way in the hopes of being treated better than I would should I appear as my most authentic self.

My self expression is always my main priority. All else falls to the wayside.

My direction in life is not directed by anyone or anything but my own passions. I am not obligated to have my life laid out and completed before I get to enjoy it.

Well, that reassured me… if it didn’t for you then….

I Love You! …. Did that do it?

Oh well, we can’t please everyone. Here’s the songs that gave me this blog topic. Absolute bangers, Mr Mendes does not miss. I swear. Okay bye boo 👻

blgpst 37023

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morxwar · 5 months

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i have 2 moods:

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bloodpen-to-paper · 11 months

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July 18, 2008

March 20, 2020

July 21, 2023

#I'm starting a collection #barbenheimer #barbie #barbie movie #barbie 2023 #oppenheimer #oppenheimer movie #oppenheimer 2023 #the dark knight #mamma mia #doom crossing #doom eternal #animal crossing new horizons

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lezigab · 11 months

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Found on Twitter sorry for no credit 🫠

#lana del rey #lana del ray aesthetic #lana del slay #ultraviolence #barbie #emo barbie #barbiecore #dark barbie #ldr community #ldr aesthetic #ldr

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c-rowlesdraws · 11 months

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"We're talking low prices."

It's Alecto, in her favorite t-shirt that she never got to wear from another life! I do hope there's still some Nona in her somewhere, but I also fully support her on her quest for revenge. Come on, Barbie-- let's go party.

#the locked tomb #tlt spoilers #tlt alecto #alecto the ninth #tlt fanart #her body shape isn't exactly barbie #but I decided that it would be hot if alecto looked like she could snap me in half like a crisp italian breadstick #also the sword was totally just referenced from a picture of narsil from the lotr movie trilogy #she is also using it against a dark lord necromancer really #my art

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manicinsaneviolentwokeidiot · 11 months

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