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gallusrostromegalus · 8 months

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The Van Has Officially Declared It Spooky Season

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I've got my parent's van for the week and it seems determined to establish my status as The Local Cryptid by terrorizing an innocent 7-11 clerk.

...I might need to back up a bit.

My mother is an eminently sensible woman who knows herself well, and when The Plauge hit, she knew she'd need some sort of mentally and physically engaging craft project to keep herself from going insane and massacring the local zoning and water management boards (even if they have it coming). So she and Dad acquired a utility van and converted it into a camper van because while they love camping, they're past the age where their joints and immune systems will tolerate sleeping on the cold ground in a nylon tent.

They did a terrific job of it and my mom taught herself woodworking and carpentry and now the van has it's own cabinets, fold-away dining table, and removable queen-sized bed with memory foam mattress. My Dad was already a computer engineer, but he learned the dark magics of automotive software and electronics to install after-market backup cameras, a media player that would take a terabyte hard drive and a solar-powered battery and outlet so they could wake up and just turn on the kettle and griddle for breakfast without having to exit the van into a cold morning on an empty stomach.

Truly, the height of Camping Luxury.

My parents are both in their mid-seventies and my primary life goal is to be at least half as cool and hale as they are when I get old.

Anyway, they take it out at least a dozen times a year and it works fabulously, but, being as I am on good terms with my parents and also finishing the process of moving house, I've been borrowing it to move large and cumbersome objects that will not fit in the back of my equally lovely but minuscule Honda hatchback.

It's a Great Van. Very easy and comfortable to drive. Stunningly good MPG for it's size. The best cruise control I've ever had in a car.

It's just also. Quirky. Mischievous, even.

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If this van has a fault its that it bears the unfortunate affliction that all lightly used white utility vans have in that the combination of an utter lack of branding features and the large dent/scrape I accidentally put on it while trying to escape a Denny's last Thanksgiving means that this vehicle is one addition of a Badly Spray-Painted "FREE CANDY" on the side away from being the sort of vehicle you see in an edgy horror movie.

It's got the same issue that Doberman Dogs have where they look like the sort of creature that likes to snack on toddler's faces whilst actually having personalities made of marshmallow fluff. This vehicle is unnecessarily menacing and I think nothing short of an airbrushed Epic Van Wizard will correct this. People see this van pull up and lean over and squint suspiciously at me when the driver's side door opens, and then look moderately confused when, instead of Charles Manson, a small, potato-shaped creature with neon purple hair and a statistically unlikely assortment of dogs emerges.

My own two dogs, Herschel the Hanukkah Goblin/Corgi and Charleston Chew The Taco Dumpster Dog, Do Not Like The Van. Even with the bed in it, they have a tendency to slide and roll around in the back, and both WILL chew through dog saftey belts or other attempts to secure them in there.

On the other hand, my house mate's dog, an exceptionally tall standard poodle whom we lovingly call "The Creature", loves the Van because SHE wears her doggy seat-belt with only mild complaining and gets to sit up in the passenger seat like A People.

Also like A People, The Creature likes to stand and walk around on her hind legs. It doesn't hurt her and it's entirely voluntary, but every so often I will feel a hand on my arm and instead of my husband or friend, it's a canine that's taller than I am on her hind legs who wants to stare at my face with soulful, concerned eyes. The Creature's favorite thing is that she is exactly the right height for me to hold her arm in Genteel Fashion and walk around the pet food or hardware store with her like I'm a count escorting a debutante around a royal ball.

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As it stands, I am set to inherit this vehicle whenever my Honda gives up the ghost, and I fully intend to paint an Epic Van Wizard on it when that time comes.

The other peculiarity of The Van is that while Dad did manage to successfully install all his after-market electronics, not all the electronics get along. Sometimes, they fight for Dominance. The Terabyte Music Player and the Backup Camera have a particularly contentious relationship, and turning on the music has about a 25% chance of turning on the backup camera as well, and turning on the Backup Camera is equally likely to turn on the music.

Firthermore, The Van has a favorite song.

I am not kidding that Dad filled an entire terabyte hard drive with music and the software to sort it via the radio controls, but of all the Early Boomer Dad Rock (Kingston Trio over The Eagles) and Irish Folk and Symphonies and the entire discography of Weird Al Yankovic, The Van's favorite song- The one it picks to play as victory music every time it beats the Backup Camera at their weird electronic game of rock-paper-scissors -is The Liberty Bell March by John Phillip Sousa.

You all know this song already.

...but in case you've forgotten the tune:

youtube

Yeah.

The Van's favorite song is the goddamn Monty Python's Flying Circus Theme Music.

It does not play this song at a normal volume.

Every time I turn on the Backup Camera and it manages to turn the music player on as well, The Van insists on absolutely blasting this nonsense on at the maximum volume it's physically capable of producing, which I know is loud enough to be heard from the Denver International Airport's Pickup zone when they Van decided to start playing it from the economy lot about half a mile away.

Perhaps it's The Van's way of honoring the aesthetic sensibilities and sonic enthusiasm of Mr. Sousa.

...I can't help but wonder if the purpose of an Epic Van Wizard is to control this sort of faerie-like malarkey, and channel these chaotic energies into things like Spell of Don't Break Down In Nevada or Enchantment Of Always Have Good Parking.

---

So last Friday the 13th, I get a call from my friend and housemate, at said airport.

It's roughly 11PM at night, and I have already retired for the evening. I am in the exact minimum of clothing required to be a decent housemate and not scandalize the neighbors should I happen to walk by a window. My feet are up. There is a cat in my lap and fictional British people murdering each other in highly inventive fashion on the tv. -But my friend has returned from her friend's wedding,and either American or United Airlines has managed to lose her luggage, including, among other valuable possessions, the keys to her car. ...So she cannot just drive home as originally planned.

There are, as luck would have it, her spare set of keys not eight feet from me.

Being a good and decent person, I agree to bring the spare keys to her so she may get home before daybreak and not spend a semester's worth of tuition on an uber across the greater Denver traffic jam.

Being also that she Loves Activities, and it's her mom we're going to pick up, I elect to take along The Creature.

I am primarily focused on remembering how to get to the airport and not leaving my friend's spare keys on the counter, so I throw on a pair of flip-flops, step outside, remember that it's AUTUMN and my minimal evening attire is not sufficient thermal protection, step back in, grab the first coat in the closet I lay hands on, pull it on, check that I have her keys again and leave.

The trip to the airport is largely unremarkable, save that it becomes necessary for me to put on sunglasses to drive, despite it being nearly the witching hour and almost entirely darker than the inside of a cow.

It's necessary because this blissful darkness of night is violently punctured by a startling number of cars that seem to have installed miniaturized but no less powerful lighthouse bulbs in where their headlights ought to go so the oncoming traffic and sports cars that insist on tailgating me in the slow lane alike illuminate the road and my mirrors with the kind of radiance I'd normally associate with the arrival of a Seraphim.

I arrive at the distant highly discounted airport car lot where my housemate is waiting, deeply apologetic. It's nothing. I say. Once I see that your car starts up, I'm gonna go to that 7-11 across the way that I parked in front of, get a slurpee or something and I'll see you at home.

While she is retrieving her vehicle (an equally eccentric but much more stately Subaru that is old enough to be elected to congress) I rifle through the loose change in the glove box and discover that I have exactly $6.66 in small bills and coins. The Subaru, continuing it's long voyage into vehicular immortality, immediately starts up.

Upon her return, we all remember that my friend had all her camping gear in the backseat of the car and there is no room for The Creature to ride home with her parent, so I again assure her it's nothing, and will just take The Creature into the 7-11 with me. She is trained as a service animal and needs the practice after the plague.

I wave my friend off and turn to enter the 7-11.

I promptly trip over the jutting back bumper of The Van and fall, cartoonishly, face-first onto the sidewalk.

Fortunately, I have a lot of practice falling on my face, and have learned not to throw my hands out but instead cover my face, so my unexpected self-inflicted attempted curb-stomping lightly scrapes my hairline and nothing else -my sunglasses even stay in place- and I get up and resume my quest for a slurpee.

It's well known that the airport is a lawless place, and the 7-11 across from the discounted airport parking at the stroke of midnight is no exception.

I know it's the stroke of Midnight because there's one of those Audubon society bird-call clocks that makes bird noises, and my arrival is heralded by the twittering call of a Summer Tanager. I am almost charmed enough by the unusual choice of chronological device to excuse the exorbitant Airport-adjacent mark-up of Slurpee prices. I stand at the machine for some time, trying to decide on a size for the price and guess what the fuck "Blue Lighting Blast" is supposed to taste like.

The Creature is being Very Polite but is somewhat agitated, I assume because she *just* saw her mother for the first time in three days and then she LEFT with no explanation, so The Creature is on her hind legs, staring woefully into my eyes, asking to be escorted around the 7-11. Even though that's not what she's not supposed to be doing, there's nobody else in here, so I let her hang off my arm and discuss various Slurpee Flavor options with her.

We eventually decide on an experiment in which I try a Small Blue Lightning Blast, and discover it tastes a bit like licking a nintendo cartridge but in a pleasantly satisfying way.

I go up to pay and realize something is amiss.

The Cashier is a young man staring at me with wide eyes, one had over the register and the other wrapped up in his rosary.

I look down at myself.

In my haste to reunite my friend with her spare keys and service animal, I had left the house in the following accoutrements:

Flip Flops. Not matching. It's below freezing outside. That last part is not particularly odd footwear for the weather in for Colorado, but it's an important detail for the rest of the ensemble.

Assorted scrapes, bruises, cuts and welts on my arms and legs that come with doing outdoor work and living in a house with three dogs and a fully-clawed cat that all want to be in my lap all the time. It's cold out, so vasoconstriction has pulled the blood away from my skin, a trait that served my ancestors well during the last Ice Age, but leaves me with pale skin to contrast the various wounds and I look like a corpse that fell out of the back of a pickup truck.

The black Bootyshorts with "CRYPTID" painted in bright red gothic font across my ass, that @theshitpostcalligrapher gave me for my wedding present.

A peculiar but extremely comfortable garment that straddles the line between "Lacy Camisole" and "Industrial-Strength Sports Bra" like the Ever Given straddling the Suez Canal. It is also Bright Red. with black accents.

The Jacket I had grabbed out of the closet, which is in fact, a black Velour Dinner Jacket.

The Tokyo-Ghoul inspired reusable anti-covid mask a friend made me with the set of Coyote Teeth.

My sunglasses, which are shaped like a Halloween Bat. The lenses are the wings and the body is the nose bridge. It is ALSO bright red.

A Very Large and remarkably Humanoid Poodle that I have been audibly affectionately calling "Dear Creature" who is hanging off my arm like she's my Prom Date.

The Very Large and remarkably Humanoid Poodle is ALSO dressed up in a black Dog Sweater that has white bones printed on it to look like its an X-ray jacket showing off her skeleton.

I look like I am taking my Very Fancy Werewolf Girlfriend to a particularly casual Dinner Party for Vampires, but the thing that's really selling it and probably alarming the kid the most is the fun accessory I acquired in the parking lot not five minutes earlier:

The "Small Scrape At my Hairline" is actually a painless but PROFUSELY bleeding head wound that I had somehow entirely failed to notice covering my face, neck, decolletage and magnificent cleavage with blood like a Tarantino Film Extra.

This does explain why The Creature has been delicately trying to use her bodyweight to push me down onto the floor for the last ten minutes. So I don't injure myself while we wait for the paramedics she hoped this kid called to arrive, you see.

The Creature has such a High and Naive Opinion of humanity.

I decide this social situation is already fucked, and the only way out is through, and with haste, before I start dripping on the floor.

"Hi there!" I say cheerfully, to indicate this is a visually alarming but not terribly serious situation. "Just a Small Slurpee!"

The Cashier has entered the relevant code into the register before I finish the sentence. His gaze flicks off me just long enough to look at the total, and he grips his Rosary harder.

$6.66

"Oh cool! I have exact change!" I say, taking the money out of my as-yet-unsanguined pocket without looking and slap it down on the counter. "You have a good night and be safe out there!" I wave, leaving.

I get in The Van, mortified, buckle The Creature up, and as I make to leave, I have to put it in reverse, which automatically turns on the backup Camera.

It also turns on the music player.

I make eye contact with the cashier as the dulcet tones of John Phillip Sousa boom from the van hard enough to make the windshield and the windows of the 7-11 rattle for the nine-and-a-half seconds I have to wait to be able to turn the volume back down. Not knowing what else to to, I give him a thumbs up, and leave.

Anyway, now I know what my Future Van Wizard has got to be dressed like, and what their familiar is.

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#Family Lore #Dogs #It's Halloween babey #friday the 13th #blood mention #I hope that kid had a good night and at least one of his friends believed him #Long post #Video

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writer-ishh · 2 months

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My Dungeon Meshi Modern AU Thoughts Instead of Writing My Economics Research Paper lmao

Ughhhh,,,, okay have been thinking about them all day and if one person manages to make it through the void and hear me out and talk about them with me then I’ll be happy lol.

WARNING: this is stupidly long, like I spent an absurd time writing every single little detail down. With that being said here we go:

cw//mentions and minor graphic descriptions of death, bullying, discrimination, injury, abuse, trauma, mental health issues, and abandonment

• Laios

- currently 26 and living with his sister Falin

- studying zoology part-time at the local college

- mostly does night classes since he works 1-2 jobs during the day to help pay for his and Falin’s tuition and apartment

- he and Fallin took their dog Muimui when they moved out, they also feed the local stray cats

- lived on a farm with his sister and parents when he was a kid, and is where his love of animals comes from

- however did not have the best of childhoods, as he was a frequent target for bullying due to having undiagnosed autism, and his father was very much a “nothing is wrong with you, toughen up the world isn’t going to coddle you” kind of person

- this was further cemented when he cried going hunting with his dad for the first time and refused to eat any of the deer or rabbit they had caught

- his mom had her own mental health problems that she was never diagnosed for, so often she fell into the same mindset as her husband when it came to Laios’ and Fallin’s behaviour, only she was more erratic due to her fear of one or both of her kids becoming like her

- never forgave his father after he sent Fallin off to a private middle/high school far away from their home, little did he know it was because the severe bullying Fallin was receiving was too much for her, and he wanted to send her away before she got hurt or worse

- nearly tried to run away at 16, however was caught by the police almost immediately and returned home

- completed his high school diploma and took off with Muimui without even saying goodbye to his parents, Fallin nearly joined him in the city but since she was still under guardianship of her parents, she couldn’t leave until she became an adult

- once graduated, she reunited with Laios in his apartment where they now live

- works nearly full-time at Senshi’s restaurant and works part-time as a janitor at their local zoo (he wants to be close to the animals lol)

- very busy but he makes it work, Marcille and Kabru have no idea how he does it without any meds or caffeine

- either has a worn out picture of him and Falin with their old dogs, or has a hand-made drawing of his theoretical strongest monster in his pocket that he looks at whenever he needs inspiration

- both him and Falin live wayyy out of the city center since rent is fucking abysmal downtown

- insists on taking the bus or walking everywhere since taxis and buying a bike costs too much, even if the commute is like 2 hours with 3 transfers

- despite this, he still has a drivers license

- the kind of guy you would expect to be eating leafy green tofu bowls from your local hipster vegan bistro, but is actually the kind of guy who eats the dubious $4 ground beef chubs and off-brand deli ham from walmart

- socks and slides with free college club t-shirts and cargo pants from the gap that come with like 50 pockets so he can carry all his stuff (the stuff mostly being dog treats and loose bird feed) bro has no drip aside from one outfit put together by Marcille

- uses the same highlighter blue and yellow adidas backpack he’s had since middle school, carries literally everything in there

- doesn’t listen to music, but if he does it’s rain/nature sounds with the $2 headphones you get from the dollarstore

- not much of a gym freak and usually just goes casually, prefers sports to working out (will have a protein shake but does not invest in creatine or other pre-workout supplements)

- either uses the same recyclable water bottle with the label torn off from a pack of 50 he got 3 years ago, or just uses one of his protein shake bottles I can’t decide

- hangs out with Marcille and Falin the most often (since Marcille constantly makes excuses to study with Falin at their apartment), sometimes gets smoothies or juice with Kabru if they run into each other

- hangs out with Senshi and Chilchuck less often, their time spent together is usually limited to having a beer after closing the restaurant or meeting together with everyone else to have dinner every couple months

- goal is to become a wildlife biologist when he graduates

- more to add if I think of it

• Fallin

- currently 23 and lives with Laios

- in her second year of studying veterinary medicine at their city’s main university

- grew up with Laios and her parents on their farm, also developed a deep love and appreciation for animals early on, but while Laios was more interested in the study of their behaviour, she was more interested in healing them

- also has undiagnosed autism like her brother, only when it came to her behaviours, she stood out a lot more and was subsequently bullied heavily for stimming, having major sensitivities to light and sound, self-isolating, talking to inanimate objects or “ghosts”, having a special interest in things like bugs or plants, and having a very specific schedule that adults had to help her with

- never really understood why adults or other children treated her differently, as she thought it was normal for everyone, however was still affected by having no friends aside from her brother during her younger years

- the bullying got so bad that kids began physically tormenting her, and since she never told Laios (who was in middle school and couldn’t always be with her), there was essentially no one to defend her

- very sadly culminates in an incident where she was intentionally locked in a graveyard overnight, and although she didn’t sustain any injuries she was fairly traumatized by the event, it was the final straw for her father to send her away to a private school at 12 years old to finish her education

- moved to a different city the next year where she stayed in dormitories, had her own room due to enrolling late

- also initially had a hard time making friends, and often cried since she couldn’t be with Laios, however no one bullied her for her autism and most often ignored her or gossiped

- had Marcille as a “buddy” to help her get acclimated to school life, however their relationship was quite awkward initially as Marcille thought she was unnerving and frankly a little stupid, however was completely shocked at Fallin’s nearly perfect grades

- school policy at that time stipulated that students had to return to the main hall for dinner at a certain time, however when Fallin doesn’t show up, Marcille has to look for her

- she finds Fallin at her secret hangout spot, similar to her dungeon in the anime, a corner with a group of trees and thick bushes that opened up into a grassy nook and a little pond, there they talk about what she does there and why she skips

- also similar to the anime, a fox (rather than a slime) catches them by surprise, but as Marcille tries to get it to run away by throwing rocks at it, Fallin stops her and explains it never comes closer than the tree line, she then points out that hurting while it’s already injured (has a slight limp) will cause it to die, allowing for the prey animals like squirrels and rabbits to eat away at most of the fauna surrounding the school, basically emphasizing the importance of all animals in an ecosystem and how it’s wrong to try and shift the ecosystem solely for our comfort or benefit (cheesy I know but it’s for the plot)

- she then offers Marcille the raspberries that grow on some of the bushes, and soon after Marcille asks if she would like to be friends

- they remain as friends in school only for another year, as Marcille graduates early and leaves Fallin behind much to her heartbreak, however does promise that she’ll visit and reunite with her soon

- by the time she graduates, she moves in with Laios and begins attending the same university as Marcille, there their friendship is reaffirmed, and they both start to develop feelings for one another

- full-time student but does work a few shifts at one of her university’s coffee shops whenever she can (tends to feel guilty about Laios helping her out with tuition on top of taking care of everything at home)

- in the honours program, and although she gets good grades her commitment is often questioned due to her habit of skipping

- reason for skipping is because she often does volunteer work at a nearby veterinary clinic

- unlike Laios, Fallin likes to bike to and from her classes

- it’s her main source of exercise, though she also does go to the gym if she has time, girl is absolutely built and is much stronger than she appears

- lives off of daily sweet treats and fried bologna sandwiches or tomato soup made by Laios

- frequently raids the raspberry bush growing outside hers and Laios’ apartment building, as well as the crabapple tree that technically belongs to the house next door but has its branches growing over the fence separating them

- also does not rely on excessive caffeine, but she does enjoy tea and coffee unlike Laios

- has a fjällräven backpack that Marcille gifted her for her birthday, mostly full of her textbooks but she does use it to carry rocks or sticks she finds interesting

- water bottle is a very dented bright pink hydro flask (also gifted to her by Marcille)

- has the jean shorts, tucked in t-shirt, and long cardigan look on lockdown, also wears hiking boots or converse, rarely is she seen in flipflops

- no make-up either, Marcille had to practically beg her to at least start using a clear lipgloss

- isn’t picky about music and usually just listens to whatever Marcille or Laios plays, sometimes she indulges in some lofi hiphop beats if she’s studying

- obviously best friends with Marcille but does not know she has a crush on Marcille, and thinks that her intense feelings of love and happiness are just normal girl friendship feelings (oh you poor thing)

- only vaguely knows of Senshi through the leftover food Laios sometimes brings home after his shifts, with Chilchuck she is more familiar since she sometimes visits him with Marcille on the weekends

- favourite thing is when her, Laios, Marcille, Izutsumi, Chilchuck, and Senshi all gather to get dinner together

- when it comes to her parents, she still maintains contact unlike Laios, though her messages tend to be generalized or cordial (not necessarily her intention it’s just she isn’t sure what to talk about in regards to her life beyond school)

- goal is to become a travelling wildlife vet

- more to add when I think of it

• Marcille

- is currently 26 and lives by herself (due to it being a modern au I’m imagining all races have the same lifespan of around 70-80 years)

- had probably the most normal upbringing and early adulthood out of all of the characters, both of her parents were very loving and attentive, always encouraging her and supporting her keen intellect through her hobbies

- however, they weren’t always around due to being very busy as government lawyers and often working late, she has very distinct memories of winning math and science awards as a child, looking out towards the crowd only to see her parents weren’t there

- was generally quite lonely during her childhood since she had no siblings or cousins to play with, a similar situation at school where most kids considered her stuck up or bossy when in reality she was just smart and was blunt about telling people when they were wrong about something

- is very close with Chilchuck, having known him and his family since she was little, although them all getting together was fairly rare, some of her fondest memories have been when they’d go on family trips together and she would get to play with Chilchuck’s daughters

- lost touch with him from ages 9-15 but reunited with him at 16 while he crashed at their place after his work injury and during his divorce, became very close with him during this time and developed a deep familial fondness for him despite all his teasing

- at 19 years old, she suffered a great deal of mental anguish as Chilchuck began to lose contact with her, Fallin was considering moving to a different city for university, and her father died due to a very sudden and unexpected stroke, she felt as though everyone in her life was slipping through her grasp and as a result, developed severe depression that would last until she completed her masters

- luckily, she had a good support system during that time and she was able to make it through the worst of it, however she still does struggle with motivation over simple tasks such as doing her hair or brushing her teeth

- her mood and outlook is much better though, having mostly returned to the same bubbly and dramatic personality that she once had

- is best friends with Fallin, and met her while at private school, mostly explained above, but her initial reaction of Fallin was quite negative before switching around after she realized that her way of thinking isn’t always the right one, even if the facts are right, her perspective and way of interpreting them isn’t always going to be sound

- this new perspective is what caused Marcille to become so enamoured with Fallin, eventually becoming a stupid crush that sticks with her to this day

- has her own studio apartment downtown, brand new building and everything (both parents are government lawyers so you can imagine the kind of money she has lmao)

- has a fawn floppy-eared bunny named Ambrosia

- despite her wealth, she doesn’t look down on her friends whatsoever, if anything she buys them expensive gifts as an act of kindness rather than an act of arrogance or condescension

- in the middle of attaining her phd in microbiology while doing independent research specializing in the study of telomere function

- attends the same university as Fallin

- graduated from high school at 16 and was done with her undergraduate by 19 and her masters by 21, a lot of people tend to think she’s full of herself but she often disregards them as people who don’t try hard enough

- born to carry her baby blue apple ecosystem in a cute tote bag, forced to haul her 7 biology textbooks in an ugly ass dark purple swissgear backpack she picked out when she was 12

- she has an unhealthy addiction to coffee and diet coke, literally cannot function without at least one per day

- cannot cook to save her life, lives exclusively off of pre-made grocery store meals or the sandwiches her university’s grab-n-go store sells, the kitchen aid mixer in her kitchen is practically a decoration at this point

- is actually the kind of person to be eating the leafy green tofu bowl from the local hipster vegan bistro

- has her own car and license, but lives close enough to her university to walk, Laios cannot fathom why she pays insurance every month for it but hardly uses or let anyone else use it

- I personally think she likes to rollerblade too

- jogging is her main form of exercise, but will also do yoga or calisthenics occasionally, probably the type of person to fall for a juice cleanse scam until Laios or Chilchuck scolds her for not eating enough

- I feel like she would be an intense swiftie (sorry :3) other than that, she likes the typical pop radio stuff that is played constantly

- at least she’s not a Stanley cup girl, she will use her scuffed gallon water bottle with the printed times of day until she dies

- very fashionable and loves to wear makeup, like wide leg pants or pleated skirts with penny loafers and cutesy blouses, a firm believer that any Korean makeup brand is far superior than anything Sephora could offer

- practically attached to the hip with Fallin, girl will find any excuse to study with her (the most pathetic sapphic ever someone put her out of her misery)

- otherwise, she’s buddy-buddy with Laios and Kabru but that’s about the extent of it, she’s known Chilchuck since she was little so he’s like an uncle to her

- she is quite friendly with Senshi and enjoys his cooking but hasn’t known him for a long time like the others, Izutsumi she treats like a little sister/niece and is always buying her things

- more to add when I think of it

• Chilchuck (you can tell he’s my fav because he has one of longest backstories lmao)

- currently 49 and living with Senshi and Izutsumi

- owns a two bedroom bungalow outside of downtown but still within the city, saved up for it after his divorce

- used to live in the suburbs with his ex-wife and daughters, but before that it was a shitty apartment close to where Laios lives now

- teen father, had Mayjack when he and his wife were 17 and had to graduate early so they could move out, they had Fullertom soon after and then Puckpatty by the time they were both 20, they got married at 22

- since neither could afford university at the time, Chilchuck went straight into a locksmithing trades program so he could have a decent income, his father had instilled a deep sense of responsibility and honour towards being a provider so he threw himself into his work which caused his and his wife’s initial frustration with one another

- when he was done apprenticing and when the kids were old enough to go to school, his wife went to university to begin studying teaching so she could become a professor, despite having to be home more often, Chilchuck still remained somewhat emotionally detached from his family

- by the time his daughters entered middle school, they had bought a house in the suburbs and his wife became qualified to teach

- feeling pressured by the mortgage, debt, and having to save for his daughter’s college, he began drinking more and taking a lot more hours at work, if he wasn’t working he was at the bar with his coworkers, he often didn’t come home until it was very late

- the final straw for his wife was when he showed up to work severely hungover and exhausted, then proceeded to nearly die in a home renovation project (passed out standing up and fell of a 20ft scaffolding, broke his hip and pelvis pretty badly as well as his humerus and quite a few of his ribs, also had a life-threatening brain bleed due to a skull fracture)

- at that point, all three of his daughters were already in university or trade school so his wife moved out and sold their house while Chilchuck was recovering in the hospital, she moved into a townhouse closer to the city’s main university where she still lives now with Fullertom

- having basically nothing in his savings, he crashed at Marcille’s parent’s place until he could save up a bit and get an apartment or townhouse (he and Marcille’s dad were friends in high school), essentially lived on their couch for about two years

- during this time, he became known as “Uncle Chil” by 16 year old Marcille and he developed a close uncle/niece relationship with her

- teased her as much as any uncle would, but also took her out shopping every couple of months, could never afford the stuff she wanted but he always got her lunch

- eventually, he saved up enough for the down payment of the two bedroom bungalow he lives in now and moved in, initially lost touch with Marcille but started being there for her more after her dad died, even began getting in touch with his daughters again at Marcille’s suggestion

- from then on, he took his work life more easily and tried to make time for himself in between shifts so that he didn’t feel he needs to drink himself stupid every time he came home, tried to pick up multiple hobbies and eventually settled on pottery making and brewing his own alcohol (that he sells…. mostly lol)

- meets Senshi at 42 when he is called in to install the locks and security system of the new restaurant Senshi is building, initially they had not been super friendly with each other, as Chilchuck found it infuriating how Senshi kept on wanting changes to be made to his security system, and how he was basically a walking construction accident waiting to happen

- once everything was finished however, Senshi offered Chilchuck a free dinner at his place as an apology for being stubborn, and unable to say no to free food (and alcohol) Chilchuck agrees

- they become friends after the dinner, however proceed to dance around each other for another 4 years until Marcille threatens to tell Senshi about Chilchuck’s feelings if he doesn’t confess himself

- Chilchuck does eventually confess (during a very charged “guy’s trip” to a resort in Mexico) and they start dating, after the trip, Senshi and Izutsumi move into Chilchuck’s place where they still currently live

- thanks to living with Senshi, Chilchuck adopts a more healthy lifestyle where he stops smoking, eats more, and drinks less, in return, he helps Senshi manage Izutsumi during her teen years as well as help out around his restaurant when he has time

- is generally living comfortably now, with a nice salary and more free time to commit to his hobbies, despite this he still deeply cares about his work and is a union man at heart who is always willing to rally behind his coworkers and organize when something happens

- mostly listens to 80s dad rock and some 90s grunge, is very proud of his CD collection

- dresses similar to Laios, however ditches the college club t-shirt and cargo shorts for polos shirts and chino shorts or dress shirts and casual slacks, also wears tacky boomer sandals for his feet or his construction boots

- drives a land rover defender that he bought in high school, cares for it deeply but isn’t a car guy by any means, he does the bare minimum maintenance to keep it safe and functional

- carries his minimal stuff in a sling bag and lunch cooler, but he also has a survival backpack in the back of his land rover for emergencies

- is a Stanley cup owner, has two, one from the 70s that his dad gave to him, and another white modern one from Marcille, his older one is covered in princess stickers from when his daughters were young

- pretentious black coffee drinker, makes fun of Izutsumi all the time for the amount of simple syrup and cream she puts into her iced coffee

- is okay at cooking, but is definitely more of a grill master, never ask him to deep fry anything though

- is also surprisingly handy thanks to the skills his dad passed onto him, speaking of his family, he isn’t very close to his mother and siblings since they all moved back to their home continent after Chilchuck graduated, he still sometimes travels alone on special holidays or on the anniversary of his father’s death but only if he can afford it

- is now a supervisor of his own crew, initially he wanted to own his own locksmith company, but he also wants to retire soon so he needs to save up as much as he can

- has two main friend groups, one he refers to as “the freaks” which includes Laios, Marcille, Fallin, Kabru, Izutsumi, and Senshi, and the other he refers to as “work” which includes Namari, Mickbell, Kuro, and Dandan

- is closest to Senshi and Marcille, seeing them as his family, however is a bit more distant with Izutsumi since he doesn’t want to automatically take on a “step-dad” role in her life, the reasoning mainly stems from his respect of her and her decisions on who she gets to let in her life, but is also because he wants to avoid things becoming awkward between them

- is, if not begrudgingly, friendly with Laios and Fallin, deep down he cares about them more than he lets on, is mostly cordial with Kabru

- is surprisingly close to Namari, however they keep their relationship strictly within their workplace and the bar they sometimes hit up afterwards

- is closer to his ex-wife and daughters now, having dinner once a month at his ex-wife’s house, they still haven’t really reconciled but they’ve allowed each other to move on

- more to add when I think of it

• Senshi (also super long please forgive me)

- is currently 52 and living with Chilchuck and his adopted daughter Izutsumi

- lives in Chilchuck’s house, but used to own a condo near the restaurant he used to work for

- when he was a child, he lived on an entirely separate continent in the remote far north, the village he grew up in was known for its mining industry, most of the community including his parents were miners, however an accident killed his father and cancer killed his mother when he was a baby, so his father’s friend Gillin took Senshi in when he was 2

- due to the mining culture surrounding the village, it was expected that Senshi also become a miner when he grew up, this coupled with the hyper-masculine ideas of honouring his late father and carrying on the bloodline, made Senshi not really put in much effort into school since he believed it had no use for him, a decision that would later hinder his career and degree options greatly

- once graduated from high school, Gillin immediately had Senshi take his safety courses and get his certification so he could get a job as soon as possible, with some references from Gillin himself, Senshi was able to land a beginner’s position within the company Gillin was in

- worked 7 years mining coal until the mine ran dry and he had to look for work elsewhere, jumped positions between 3-4 companies over another 8 years mining iron and copper until he landed a 2 year contract at a remote but booming silver mine

- was put into a 6 man team composed of himself, Gillin, Brigan, Invar, Totan, and Noor, where they would descend into a highly unregulated and dangerous mountain mine and extract the massive veins of silver, they all were paid well, but the conditions were next to abysmal

- 1 year and 9 months into the contract, a rockslide on the south side of the mountain caused a cheap tunnel support to collapse over the only exit leading out of the stope they were mining in, effectively trapping them indefinitely

- luckily they had a ventilation shaft, but none of them could fit inside and escape or yell for attention since they were trapped over 200ft deep and 500ft in the mountain, so their only option was to ration their food and wait for help to arrive

- they do try to escape in other ways, such as mining through the collapsed support, however this only leads to injury among the group, and as much as Senshi wanted to help, he was under strict instruction by Gillin not to over-exert himself, even though he wasn’t a kid anymore, he still had the most strength and wits among them all, this also results in him receiving the most food much to Brigan’s rage

- in an attempt to be useful, Senshi started drawing up the maps of the mine to see if there was a tunnel close by they could mine into

- as more time passes and they realized no one would be coming to help them, their escape attempts become much more desperate, one attempt to blow up the collapsed tunnel entrance with their remaining explosives leads to the death of Totan, another attempt to start mining over the collapsed tunnel entrance leads to the death of Noor, one last attempt to remove the panelling lining the ventilation shaft so they could be able to fit through leads to the death of Invar, leaving only Brigan, Gillin, and Senshi left

- after six weeks of being trapped under ground, Brigan mentally snaps and tries to cannibalize Senshi so they could eat his flesh, this leads to a physical altercation between Gillin and Brigan which ends in an unstable overhang of rock to collapse and crush Brigan and for Gillin to succumb to his wounds and exhaustion

- alone and starving, Senshi realizes he is now skinny enough to fit through the ventilation shafts and crawl his way out, he uses a combination of ropes and support spikes to help aid him, but soon quickly realizes he mostly has to navigate in the dark

- for two more weeks, Senshi follows the map he memorized and the feeling of airflow to make his way out, only surviving off of his remaining water, in the end he managed to crawl out of a shaft just outside the mining camp

- relived and also deeply saddened, Senshi remains near the shaft until some workers doing a perimeter check find him in the morning, he is promptly taken into the hospital to treat his injuries

- after explaining the situation to the police and his boss, his boss offers him a $30,000 payout to keep quiet and say nothing, the officers say it is possible to take his boss and the company to court, however it would likely put him into massive debt trying to find a good lawyer, in the end Senshi takes the money and leaves the camp for his village

- what’s left to him by Gillin is another $50,000 in savings and property assets, the rest is given to his remaining family, the first thing Senshi buys with the money is his adamantine pot and mythril knife, using both to make a soup Gillin would often feed him, and leaving five bowls of it outside of the collapsed silver mine before moving out of his village for good at aged 35

- he moves to the continent and city where all the other characters are currently living, buying his condo and deciding to enter into 4 year culinary school program

- during these 4 years, Senshi comes to realize that cooking is his true passion, finding it immensely rewarding and fulfilling, and even though he didn’t make many friends due to his unorthodox taste and recipes, it was still the most happy he’s ever been

- about 1 year after graduating and getting a job as the main line cook for a high end restaurant, Senshi meets and adopts 5 year old Izutsumi

- he initially sees her wandering around the green belt outside and behind the restaurant, kicking rocks and occasionally running and hiding in trees, he was always worried she was homeless, however would always see she was gone by the time he was done his shifts

- around five months of this, Izutsumi notices and begins to approach Senshi, as if she had wanted food, Senshi would usually offer some of his packed lunches or leftovers and she would always accept and sit next to him while they ate

- Izutsumi usually never spoke but was always ravenous, Senshi often worried that she was being abused, but whenever he would ask she would always say no, and since she was a healthy weight and never had any bruises or welts, Senshi reluctantly believed her, after that though he began packing more food

- eventually, a woman (Maizuru) approaches Senshi after one of his shifts and bluntly asked if he would like to take care of Izutsumi from then on, baffled he asked who she was and why she knew he was feeding Izutsumi, and she explained that she is her caretaker

- she also explained that since Izutsumi seemed to trust and respect Senshi the most, that he would be the best person to give her a chance at a normal life and raise her into an adjusted adult, due to the fact that she has no regard or interest or respect in her or the rest of her foster family, she then conceded that her question was rather sudden, but still implored Senshi to take her into his care or otherwise she would be forced into an orphanage

- thinking of Gillin, and with the wound of his crew’s death still in his mind Senshi, perhaps impulsively, agrees to take Izutsumi in, much to Maizuru’s delight and thankfulness

- the next day, she returns with Izutsumi and her things and tells Senshi that she will handle most of the legal paperwork aside from the few forms that he will have to sign

- from that point onward, he took care of Izutsumi and made sure she got through school, although she wasn’t completely responsive and obedient, he was still very patient and understanding with her, except for the first few times she would keep on running away from school to join him for his lunch breaks

- they have a very trusting relationship with one another, and Senshi is the only one Izutsumi will open up to, Senshi often encouraged her talent of athleticism by signing her up for various sports, he was and still is very attentive towards her needs and is always feeding her the things she likes (and dislikes)

- Senshi works at the restaurant for another 9 years, simultaneously saving up for his own restaurant and saving for Izutsumi’s college, at age 45 he meets Chilchuck during the construction of his restaurant and they form a close friendship

- subsequently, he is introduced to Marcille, Fallin, Laios, and even Kabru, but still mostly interacts with Chilchuck and Itsuzumi

- however he is quite close with Laios since he works as a server at his restaurant and is very enthusiastic about his cooking technique, flavour pallet, and types of dishes he serves

- at age 49, he officially opens his restaurant and starts dating Chilchuck, the three of them all move in together and become a household unit

- is now very happy with where he is at in life, works and manages his restaurant while still making time for Izutsumi and her hobbies, is very close with Chilchuck and becomes the first person he opens up to about his past and what he went through, generally the grossest and most sappiest old couple you will ever meet

- made a Senshi-sized hole deep into the fabric of Chilchuck’s home, converting his backyard into a full vegetable and flower garden that he maintains, is super proud about it and often leaves the prettiest flowers on Chilchuck’s side of the bed or in a vase on Izutsumi’s bedside table

- head-chef and owner of his restaurant, his favourite part is being able to cook what he wants for a very specific audience (people like Laios)

- his food is not super high-end but also not like a family diner either, a healthy mix of both, like kid friendly while still being classy and opulent enough to take someone out on a date there

- drives his beloved suzuki carry to and from work every day, does a good job maintaining it on his own despite it being boring according to him

- I honestly don’t really know what Senshi would listen to, I feel like the most in character for him would be folk music from his home country or bossa nova i can’t really decide

- coffee with lots of sugar but no cream or milk, prefers drinking black tea with milk and honey if he has a choice

- bag is a basic backpack with minimal items like wallet, keys, lipbalm, mints, etc… always has a change of clothes in case his gets dirty at work, also has extra hair and beard nets, some stuff for Izutsumi is in there too

- water bottle is also a vintage stanley cup, but his is wayyy more dented than Chilchuck’s and older (from like the 50s) refuses to buy anything else until it is unusable, has had the same piece of duct tape sealing a leak near the bottom for the past 20 years

- also can’t decide if he’s a t-shirt or Hawaiian shirt kind of guy, probably a healthy mix of both, also mostly wears shorts or a kilt-like garment native to his home country, lives exclusively in sandals you will never find him in close-toed shoes unless he’s working

- funny story deriving from this fact, the first impression Chilchuck ever had of Senshi (aside from “damn he’s kinda hot”) was “oh my god how the fuck is this guy not dead” due to the fact that Senshi showed up to the construction sight with flip flops, no safety helmet, and no safety vest on whatsoever

- more to add when I think of it

• Izutsumi (still a cat-girl in this universe)

- currently 17 and living with Senshi and Chilchuck

- used to live with the Nakamoto’s as a foster child, however hated living there due to the unfamiliarity and attempts at sweeping her past trauma under the rug and refusing to treat her for it

- life before the Nakamoto’s is fuzzy, it’s implied by her councillor and confirmed by Maizuru later on that she was raised by her mother until she died or abandoned her at 3 years old, was then placed into the care of another foster home who physically and verbally abused her, keeping her chained up in the basement most of the day and hardly feeding her, if not forgetting about her all together

- she was taken in by the Nakamoto’s at aged 4, and had a very hard time managing her due to her stunted social skills, anger issues, and delayed language development manifesting itself in avoidance behaviours such as running away and lashing out violently

- had frequent nightmares during this time, resulting in her becoming very clingy during the night

- would often run away to the green belt close to her house, the same green belt that was connected to Senshi’s restaurant

- initially only approached him because of the smell of food, her prior abuse and malnutrition resulted in an early form of binge eating, so she often sought any sight, smell, or taste food as a way of safety and comfort

- unlike all her previous caretakers, she found Senshi to not be malicious or uncaring towards her, especially after he started sharing and bringing food for her, her ease around him didn’t go unnoticed by Maizuru who then offered Senshi the deal to take care of her

- initially hated living in Senshi’s condo since the small space reminded her of the basement she was kept in, but soon found it to be much more comfortable if she could smell the food Senshi would make

- Received counselling for her trauma and slowly began to get better, however she would still frequently act out or skip school as a coping mechanism, however, Senshi helped her regulate her energy and emotions through signing her up for various sports, she did volleyball, hockey, wrestling, swimming, etc… until she settled on gymnastics and Muay Thai

- has somewhat of a complex towards love and attachment, in that she doesn’t fully believe an individual cares for her or loves her so will often do whatever she likes both because she doesn’t think it affects the other person that much and because it will prevent people from wanting to get close to her and have a meaningful relationship, a complex that stems from her past abuse

- is now in a much better headspace than she was in, as she has two caretakers who are patient and understanding with her, but are also willing to discipline her and prepare her for the outside world, she also has a good external support system and even a friend at school whom she often hangs out with

- she is currently in her junior year of high school, with decent grades, but only because Senshi and Chilchuck want her to do well so she has more options for university

- her best subjects are science, phsy ed., english, has a hard time with social studies and math

- her one friend her age is Tade as they both are frequently sent to the after-school homework program to help improve their grades, Izutsumi is usually good at shouldering off her homework to her in exchange for ice cream or food, but she’s usually caught and forced to do double the work

- Tade is also a foster kid of the Nakamoto’s, in fact she was the one Izutsumi would usually go to sleep with if she had a nightmare, so they never hang out at her house and either stay at Izutsumi’s house or hang out at the local park/mall

- is very talented athletically, and has won multiple awards at gymnastics and Muay Thai competitions

- still a ravenous eater, but with a crazy fast metabolism so she gains almost no weight, still picky with vegetables and mushrooms but will still eat them as long as their hidden in her food well enough

- coffee flavoured milk drinker, if there’s even a hint of bitterness in her coffee she’s throwing it out

- is into most old alternative or indie rock, appreciates Chilchuck’s taste in music immensely, she’s been learning how to play the bass recently

- has been learning basic recipes from Senshi and can manage a few dishes on her own, is much better at baking overall, never leave her alone with the blowtorch or barbecue though

- aside from sports, she enjoys playing video games and sleeping, she likes mostly storytelling or competitive console games like Skyrim, God of War, and Call of Duty

- bag is a simple black backpack that has all of her papers and textbooks haphazardly shoved in with no regard for neatness or organization, on a good day a pencil will be in there too

- water bottle is non-existent, she uses drinks from the school water fountain as an excuse to get out of class and wander around for a bit

- is old enough to drive and has her license, but doesn’t have her own car yet and still has to catch the bus, if she does drive it’s Senshi’s suzuki, Chilchuck let her drive his land rover once and she backed into a pole

- lives in crop tops and shorts, is actually quite fashionable but doesn’t have the energy or motivation to pull anything off, either wears converse, slides, crocs, or doc martens as footwear, most would describe her style as grunge-ish

- makeup is hit or miss, sometimes she can muster some concealer and eyeliner, but for the most part she just washes her face and nothing else, she is big into jewelry though and likes to wear lots of accessories

- has been allowed to pierce her ears quite extensively, as well as her nose, however both Senshi and Chilchuck have drawn the line at any other face piercings until she’s an adult, much to her dismay

- outside of Senshi, Chilchuck, and Tade, she is probably the most friendly with Marcille and Fallin as they frequently visit and interact with her, Marcille especially loves to spoil Izutsumi with treats and gifts since she never had a little cousin growing up

- Izutsumi likes Fallin for her quietness and ability to keep out of her business, however saw first hand how weird she can be when she held up a massive rhinoceros beetle without even flinching, also when she kept on excusing herself to their backyard to go snack on their strawberry plants

- Laios and Kabru she knows of, also finds Laios to be very weird but is less friendly about it than she is with Fallin, his lack of understanding of social cues also confuses her

- more to add when I think of it

AND THATS IT!!! This was stupidly long, I hope I didn’t bore you to death lol. I’ll probably do another one of these so I can include Chilchuck’s daughters, Kabru, Namari, etc… maybe with some additions to the main cast, but yeah that’s about the extend of it, hope you enjoyed :3

#dungeon meshi #delicious in dungeon #laios touden #falin touden #chilchuck tims #senshi of izganda #izutsumi #marcille donato #modern au #farcille #chilshi #labru if you squint #dungeon meshi minor characters #this took me forever I am so exhausted #I kinda wanna make a fic out of this but I have no idea what plot line or what character I should even focus on lmaooo #hooray for hyper-specific character interpretations!!

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nor-4 · 2 months

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Daemon and Reader as Catherine punishing Peter scene.

"Ah, I wanted to talk to you.." Daemon startledly said as you burst the door open as you walk nearly run infront of him with anger, "I want you to meet the pups I stole" He happily said pointing at the dogs that he recently stole from somewhere in the street.

He opened his mouth to talk again but was cut off by you slapping him enough to make his head move, "This is my court and my rules." You said loud enough for the words to echo around the room.

"I-"

"You fucking killed my guard again didn't you?" You accused him looking at him with fierce he have seen for many times but it still makes him shaken for some reason and horny. "I did. And felt bad about it." Daemon gulped as if he really meant what he said.

"This random violence is not the way of my court." You lowered your voice a bit into normal but the anger didn't leave your tone, "He called me dickhead."

"That is your answer?" You asked him thinking about how stupid it does sound, sometimes you will laugh at his jokes and actions like this. But the fun is dead when he is about to get exiled again if you didn't do a good convincing with viserys for him to stay and give another chance. "I killed a man because he called me dickhead?" You mocked his words into his face.

"Do you hear how that sounds?" You asked once again but it seems like he is not paying attention nor care for the consequences of his actions, "Sounds perfectly logical." He answered which angers you more than you will ever be.

"Violence is not the answer to everything."

"It is a language that everyone understands. You will not get far if you do not come to terms with that." Daemon tried to reason what he did which is your last straw, "Fine. Guards." You called turning your back at daemon just to face the door as you saw ser harwin and ser criston enter the door.

"Beat the fuck out of him." You ordered after facing daemon again, "Funny. You're a witty creature. At times. The point is so slight, one almost does not." Daemon tried joking as the guards starting to walk near him as he turn at the guards stopping from his yapping, "What the fuck are you two doing?"

That's the last words he said before a punch was deliver direct to his stomach, he is near to be called kinslayer but let's not lie he still can't take punches. He only wins a fight when he punch the living demon out of a person without even them getting to touch him.

He was thrown at the floor as the guards starting to stomp him same reasons for aemond and Aegon who are also in the room to stand up but helaena who are in the same room as them just stayed on her seat and drink her tea in silence, she does know how woman's anger can be and truly understands yours. They do hate daemon with the every hair in their skin but that doesn't mean they wouldn't care for him who just got beat up over a petty fight.

"Hey!" Aegon tried to intervene just to get shut down, "Help and you will be shocked. My husband and I are busy discussing an issue." You explained before turning your back at them as they just sat down learning not to also face your anger.

You decide it's probably the time to stop this as you walked near him and bow down just for him to hear your point, "Can you hear me now?" You mocked him.

"Fucking hell." Aegon said in shock with mouth agape, he is a bit thankful that he is betrothed with helaena even though he have fantasies you many times. "Enough." You said after hearing a husky grunts from him, the guards immediately stopped and walked behind you leaving daemon who just curled up.

"All of you, out!" You said as they hurriedly left the room, "What the fuck?" Daemon said standing up to his feet. "Yeah if that had actually hurt. I'd be quite angry right now." He said with wide eyes trying to catch his breath from earlier.

"Is that how you wish me to make my point?" You asked him again discussing your point since he never learn from a simple word, "I said I wasn't proud of it. Clearly it would be better I had not." he reasons once again.

"For you I will try to be better next time. Now I would like to go truffle hunting with my new dog." he said pointing at the dogs again as if he is not beaten, "No." You disagree on him.

"Do not be a bitch. You kicked me and made your point. I've taken it graciously. The difference between lovers." he joked as if anything would be better, "We are not lovers. We will never be lovers. You are bloodthirsty thug, and I wish I had killed you when I had the chance." You spight at him. Daemon already knows that feeding your anger will be worse, he hates how lower you can get when he says something. It can be a joke or not but he knows that everything you say when you are angry is not something serious because arguing with each other is your hobby, for some reason.

"Guards. Grab his dogs." You walked away from him as the guards hurriedly get the dog before daemon do. "Lock him in." You ordered as all of you raced to leave the room as ser criston was the one to leave to fastly shut the door at demon's face.

#daemon targaryen x reader #daemon x reader #daemon targaryen #hotd #house of the dragon

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super-who-locked-me-in-here · 26 days

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Do you think he was ever in love with Bedelia like he was in love with Will? I ask this because Bedelia says they were both the "brides of Hannibal". But Hannibal never courted her like he did with Will, Bedelia came into Hannibal's life much before Will but he never pursued her like he did with Will. Mads said he wanted a future with Will unlike with other people he hooked up with Alana, Bedelia or Anthony. He took her to Italy as a consolation prize when Will betrayed him. Even in Italy H was pining about Will all the time and telling Bedelia how much he loves Will. I know he slept with Bedelia but he probably slept with Anthony too and he slept with Alana, Hannibal is a hedonistic guy who sleeps around. For him sleeping with someone doesn't mean he is in love with them. On the other hand he took a bullet for Will, went to prison for years for Will, made a human heart for Will, jumped off a cliff for Will, committed a whole massacre for Will. But when Will confronts Bedelia, she pretends as if Hannibal held them in the same regard which is obviously not true. Hannibal would choose Will over her in a heart beat and even she knows it but yet she acts as if Hannibal sees them both equally. I don't understand why? 😭 Why do you think?why make herself seem like a competition when she is not?

My personal take on it is that Bedelia is Hannibal's Molly. Molly/Bedelia was the second choice, pursued after the man that Will/Hannibal wanted acted unexpectedly and now he has to live without him.

Bedelia and Will were both Hannibal's brides, the same way Hannibal and Molly are both Will's.

The ultimate difference between Will and Molly and Hannibal and Bedelia lies in what the women saw and how much they accepted. Will worked hard to keep his true self from Molly and she was content with the fact that she'd never be able to see all the way behind the mask. Hannibal exposed a lot of himself to Bedelia, and what little he didn't show, she forced the mask the rest of the way off so she could see it. Molly offered common courtesy and a happy family picture to escape to whereas Bedelia offered a safe façade to escape with, with no remorse for her prying actions.

I do think Hannibal slept with Bedelia because regardless of the intimate hints that were there (unzipping Bedelia's dress, him walking around shirtless without his hair slicked back, her bathing him), Bedelia is a curious creature and her curiousity shows itself as gluttony. I don't actually think it's lust that she felt for him, and definitely not love, but she wanted to glut herself on every detail about the way Hannibal's mind and body worked, and she wanted to be the only one to know both, or at least be the first. She's a hedonist, just like Hannibal, so it wouldn't surprise me in the least if between her curiousity and both their hedonism, they slept together once to experiment and it ended up working for both of them, even if it was an emotionless act, so they continued doing it.

And I think Will was tolerant of his marriage with Molly. It's really funny the way the loop works out because I've already elaborated on how Bedelia is Hannibal's Molly, but I think Molly is also what Alana would've been to Will if they'd pursued a relationship earlier on. She's sweet and friendly and beautiful. She's good with kids and Will's dogs. She appears delicate and lighthearted but is actually quite headstrong when those she cares about are put in danger. She's tolerant. She's the perfect wife, and she always will be until the moment Will exposes himself and his desire to pursue darker interests, to pursue Hannibal. Then he's not a good husband, and it's hard to be a good wife for a bad husband. Molly at the very least didn't have the chance to leave Will; he made that choice for her.

But in the end, hedonism and tolerance are very different than true happiness and acceptance. So no, I don't think Hannibal loved Bedelia. I think she was a distraction and a means to an end and an escape to an unfulfilling life because Hannibal couldn't have the good life that he wanted with Will. And to some extent I think Molly was all that for Will too.

#got kinda off track there whoopsie #lmao #what a fun question though #hannibal #hannibal analysis #hannibal lecter #will graham #bedelia du maurier #molly foster graham #alana bloom #hannibal season 3 #ask #anon ask #dot says

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goldenlinixx · 4 months

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future!harry / dad!harry x taylorrussell

The trophies are not the most valuable thing in my life, my love xx

"mummy mummy mummy what are those trophies in daddy's room?" taylor is in the middle of preparing lunch when the loud footsteps and completely excited voice of her almost four-year-old daughter light up the house styles. no sooner has tay turned round to look at her little girl than the exact same green eyes as her husband's are looking at her. "my angel, what are you doing in daddy's working place?" "i was looking for rooti" "oh my angel, you know that root has her place here in the living room. that's where she’s lying: look". there lies the little family dog, who has now reached old age, asleep in her basket, completely unaware that her „sister" is excitedly running around the house looking for her. tay lovingly strokes the curls from her daughter's face. taylor loves to answer the questions from her little one. it was only a matter of time before she discovered the "trophies", as she affectionately calls them.

„the „trophies" is the most valuable thing your dad owns. it's a so-called grammy, my little sunshine." "a grammy?" "yes exactly, a grammy … daddy and i told you that he makes a lot of people in the world happy with his songs, right? and you know my love... a grammy is the most valuable thing a music artist like daddy can ever get in his life and career." "so daddy is a superstar?" "yes my little peanut, you could say that ... daddy is a superstar" taylor can't help but smile and place a loving kiss on her little daughter's hairline. they have just finished their intimate moment when they hear the front door slam shut. "i think daddy's back from his jog" as soon as taylor has finished her sentence, the little one is already walking quickly towards the front door. "daddyyy you're a superstar" harry can just about put his airpods down on the cupboard before his three-year-old daughter jumps into his arms. "hello my little darling." this really is the best thing for harry. he has never wanted anything more than to be almost run over by his own little daughter after a strenuous run. "now tell me again peach ... what am i? a superstar?"

harry's little daughter hugs him close. "yes, i was looking for rooti and then i looked in your room and then i saw your trophies and mummy told me that they are grammys." in the meantime, taylor has also found her way to her two favourite people. first and foremost, of course, to say hello to her husband. this morning they hadn't seen each other because he had left early for his long sunday run. she only caught a loving kiss on her sleep while she was still half asleep.

"our little angel was very excited. i told her that her daddy makes a lot of people in the world happy with his music and got his grammys for it." smiling, harry can't help but go up to his beloved taylor and pull her tightly into a hug and a long, deep kiss. of course, he holds their daughter tightly in his other arm. "oh so that's how it is. a hello to you too my darling" "hi babe" the intimate kiss between the two is quickly interrupted by their sweet little daughter. "and mummy told me that it is the most valuable thing you own" harry carefully sets his daughter down on the floor. that he can communicate with her at the same level, he squats down lovingly next to her.

"mummy's not quite right. you know, my love, the trophies, the grammys, are not the most valuable thing in my life that i own. musically speaking, yes, but in a personal way, you are the most valuable thing in my life. you, your mum and your sister in mummy's belly. you know, my peach ..music was the most important part of my life for a long time and it still is to some extent. but when i met your mummy, love took centre stage and i wanted other things in life. i wanted you, for example ... but now i mainly write music or songs because i'm happy. and i'm happy because i have you. you are the most important and therefore the most valuable thing in my life. so love you to the moon and back." in support of his loving explanation, harry gives his little daughter a loving kiss on the head, who then presses herself very close to her dad.

"you said that so beautifully, h. we love you so much too" in support of her statement, taylor can't help but caress her baby bump, which has grown quite a bit in the meantime. harry notices this too and immediately puts his hand on his wife's bump as well.

in that moment he realises once again that his music will never make him as happy as his own little family does. his success can never reach the value that being a dad does. he will be forever grateful that he spent that one month in los angeles and met taylor, the love of his life.

harry and taylor can't wait to show their daughter all the photos and videos taken at the grammy awards that night as a bedtime story. harry has wished for nothing more in life than to be able to show his own children these photos one day. that moment has now arrived and he could never be happier.

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i really love harry and taylor so much and can't help but write down my thoughts and sweet imaginations that keep buzzing around in my head.

i hope you enjoyed it!

xx Celine

#harrystyles #tayrry #couple #taylorrussell #dad!harry styles #dadrry #dad!harry #dad harry styles #harry styles imagine #harry styles oneshot

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majaloveschris · 7 months

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I do think he looked happy talking about his wedding and what little mention of 🐟 he did, especially with the go Portugal but putting aside how sincere or not that was, is pretty obvious it was something he had to mention and the rushed to move on from it and I think its because he knows how people feel about it and he cares, he cares that people will judge him from it (from now on I will asume its 100% real, the ring is there, he confirmed the wedding, called her his wife) wich to me is baffling because if you just married the love of your life and are happier than ever why would you care? He is not coming back to insta or twitter so he will not see the reactions, she can limit comments. Hollywood literaly doesnt care he is married to that kind of person, if he were a good actor nothing but that would matter so why would you care if people dont like your rs? The answer I think its because he is trying to bring back the fanbase he actively killed and so to me it looks like he would rather keep his wife as hidden as possible so he can keep his "A" list status and man that just tells a lot about him... Hence why he also spoke 30 seconds about arguably the most important day of his life till now and 10 about his dog, cause is the latter that sells. Had she been someone nice, someone to not be ashamed of (because thats the impression HE gives) he could have capitulated in the devoting husband look, but no he knows and doesnt care enough that he married her but cares enough to hide her.. Like make it make sense. Also I might said he looked happier that what he have seen him during this whole shit show but that doesnt mean he looks good.. He looks rough, the consequences of what he have done this past 2 years are catching to him fast.

I mean, he obviously cares what people think about him; all celebrities do. They live off their fans, since the only people who watch presumably every single project of theirs are their fans. He obviously wants to save what's left, but good luck for that. There are people who will never come back, but until his name is connected to people like Alba and her friends, he's going to lose fans.

If he is actually in love and happy with her (which I don't see, but okay), he doesn't need to divorce her because of other people; however, he needs to understand that not a lot of people can't support this, and mostly not because of the age gap but because of Alba's and her friends' behavior. He can do whatever he wants; there are people who are done with him, and that's it.

I definitely understand that his reputation is important for him and that whatever he says, he probably wants to stay in the industry, but the way he treated and talked about her, especially if she is the love of his life, is really interesting. I guess he had no problem appearing with Jenny, who was still married, by the way. If you love somebody so much that you want to marry them, then be proud of them. I'm not saying they should be out every single day kissing and hugging or whatever, but whenever we see them (in real time, not in a staged photo), he seems so distant. Dropping her hands in NYC, not letting her walk the red carpet, not holding her hands, saying weird things about her, like she is really into other people's energy. If this was love at first sight, and they knew they were in for the long ride, then he probably knew he's going to marry her, so he knew people were going to see her a lot of times, and they had to get used to it. So I don't really understand this whole hiding and breadcrumbing bullshit.

#majaloveschris #chris and alba relationship #cevans-love

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roxannepolice · 7 months

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hi!!! hows it goin i’m here to dump my thoughts about simm!master/lucy vs ten and martha cause i have MANY. also a disclaimer before i begin that i’m white and that likely does color my experience as a viewer compared to a BIPOC viewer. anyways: i’ll start with ten and martha because by sound of drums we’ve spent all season watching them and its that already established dynamic which i think lucy/saxon are meant to parallel in a way. you have ten very much still grieving rose and his entire planet, which makes him try and push away any new companions for a bit. but he’s still looking for - and i think needs, in a way - this kind of connection where he can depend on someone, and ideally they could depend on him. however. ten sucks at this second bit. for the entire season. so he’s in need of this connection despite not wanting any whatsoever, emotional intelligence completely out the window right now since he’s grieving x2, and martha unfortunately walks in right in the middle of this. so you get this dynamic really starting from i’d say the shakespeare code wherein martha is carrying a lot of the weight in their relationship. ten will entrust her with the most deeply personal shit (like his memories of gallifrey, his feelings on losing rose, even in 42 where he’s like "i’m scared i’m so scared" where he depends on martha for emotional support) and then when martha’s like hey can i get some support here or something ten’s like “uh sorry all out too busy being sad” i mean that's a bit exaggerated/summarized but thats the vibe they have. in the beginning he doesn't even admit she’s traveling with him! he’s all “just one trip” “just one more” and refuses to make a concrete decision that martha really needs him to make already. and despite this emotional unavailability shtick ten still relies on martha quite a bit! off the top of my head you have 42(martha freezing/unfreezing ten as he screams in pain), blink (they get sent back to the 1960s… and only martha gets a job???), and. human nature. wherein martha endures racial abuse alongside lesser shitty working conditions in order to ensure the doctor doesn't get his body possessed or something. and in the middle of it this human version of the doctor falls in love with another woman(after basically uh leading her on for the whole fucking season) (sure maybe unintentionally but that's not the point here) who. also was racist to her she's not even a nice person. and her only friend in this godawful place gets possessed. and human doctors a dick to her. and i think. i reflect on it and i come to the conclusion that ten very much does expect martha to just… do his job for him sometimes. handle all the dirty work like making sure human him doesn't get distracted or hurt or die. and still immediately after is like haha we are in 1960 now. i will not get a job what is that. why do you want me to “communicate” or “pull my weight” you’re traveling across space and time lol.

and the master and lucy are a darker extension of this dynamic that i actually haven't really seen people talk about much!! the master is very clear about why he married lucy, and there is no love/admiration/respect whatsoever in there. it is purely a means to an end - her family gets him influence, and she helps him carry out his plans. he gives nothing to lucy, only takes. which is in itself a mirror to ten & martha - the audience knows ten isn’t intending to be malicious in how he treats martha throughout the series, but when paralleled to lucy & the master i think you really get a sense of the harm this can cause down the line. what resentment this kind of dynamic can lead to. and ALL THE WHILE martha is walking the entire planet for a year to save all of humanity while ten hangs out aged 100 with his little tent & dog bowl & seething sorta-ex-husband-boyfriend-whatever. i mean he doesn't have the best time either but he also doesn't have to do that much and also is perhaps a bit too happy about not being the last time lord to fully grasp that hey, uh, humanity's in pretty dire straits right now. martha watches as the master turns earth into a living nightmare, slaughters millions of people on a whim, turns ten into a 900-year-old tweety bird, and tortures her family for a year, only for ten to go “guys dw i can fix him lol we’ll just live in the tardis for eternity together” as if she hadn't had to fight for that too. and ten is still shocked-pikachu-face when she goes “yeah no i’m leaving. i gotta get out.” and that is very much similar to lucy's moment in a way! where she sees the doctor forgiving(without really considering everybody else's opinion on the Past Year), martha's mom talked down from killing him, even Jack is talked down from his confusion at the whole idea, and i think in that moment she goes. okay. you guys can forgive. you guys can let him walk away having just taken, taken, taken everything without any repercussions. i meanwhile have this gun and two years of pent-up rage coursing through my veins. and both of these moments - martha leaving, lucy firing the gun - come at a shock to the doctor and the master. i mean you can see the master's little "oh" face when he gets shot. even if he plays it up like he expected it after i don't think he considered it before. and i think on a certain level neither really expected to be called out like this - ten because he’s got the emotional intelligence of a baseball bat, the master because he doesn’t think humans are capable of wiping their own asses - so in both of these moments in LoTL theyre like "wait i didn't know you could do that"

anyways tl;dr thats why i think lucy and the master are a darker parallel to the doctor and martha in their own way. which feeds into the rest of the finale where the master is just showing the natural extremes to who the doctor is - this is that toxic dependency taken to its natural worst possible place, where you treat someone as a tool rather than as a person. the master's generally a great foil to the doctor but the series 3 finale is just a fantastic example of it i think.

OMG, thank you so much for sharing your thoughts like this! And I love your thought process here so much.

First, absolutely, Martha is the case of right person, wrong time... which is probably what makes hers my favourite companion arc - as I like to put it she travelled through hell and pulled her Virgil (because yes, the Doctor absolutely always has this guide role that brings Virgil to mind, at least in companions' first episodes) to the Earthly Paradise in the process. There's a lot of debates going on about whether Ten was leading Martha on, because on the one hand - well, he's very clear he's not into her romantically, on the other - ok, bitch, you made it clear the kiss doesn't mean anything, but also you hit off with flirtatious winks and end showing off time travel while also casually showing off your Adam's apple. Yeah, a girl can make deductions. And you're right that this superficial frankness is mirrorred in Master's relation to Lucy - though if anything he's crrepily keen on playing a caring husband, what with the 100% performative hug he gives her while the Toclafane are hacking a journalist up. Though I suppose in his head this is what the Doctor does as well when they comfort their companions. And let's give it to Ten - when he said he's not going to let Martha *checks notes* fry in a small capsule in far space because of a sentient sun, he does bend head over tits and does as promised. But historically it has happened that the Doctor's reassurances were hollow (future, but kind of most painful in Twelve assuring Bill he's going to de-cybermanize her only to later admit yeah not really an option... considering Saxon was there to witness this, I wonder if he marked this in his Notebook (of Rassilon) of Spiting the Doctor).

Ten's handling of the chameleon arch is kind of pathetic, thanks for pointing that out! Like, ok - if the Family gets a whole Time Lord lifetime it is a genuine threat to the universe, but his attitude of oh I'm just going to spend three months as a human in a random timespace, what could possibly go wrong, and anyway, Martha will be there to clean up any mess? is a mess. I do like John Smith's romance with nurse Radfem, though, not in the sense of shipping them, but more of an appreciation of the concept: a classic victorian/edwardian romance, but when you look at it from the persective of a BIPOC servant... it kind of becomes apparent both parties are dickheads. This does tie back to the Master in a way, because I think... want to think... that by the time the Doctor went oh no, we're better than a tyrant maniac that spent a whole year destroying the planet and torturing everyone in the room specifically, so we're not going to execute him, I'm going to put him in my nice spaceship and we'll have nice cuddle movie evenings instead, she was already hardened by the fact that he put her in an (unintentionally) tailor made emotional torture room for three months only to later reveal oh yeah, I could absolutely have handled them all along. Is just higher moral ground, innit?

I guess as all best foils do, the clue lies in the diffrences, though, right? Both Martha and Lucy end up deeply disillusioned with their respective semi-immortal twinks from space, but in one case there is still a disillusioned friendship (Ten's surprised Pikachu face, excellent comparion) and in the other there's only hate - and for good reasons! And where the Doctor grows to really respect Martha (and I wouldn't say he started off dismissive, I mean he is impressed when she tells him oh no mister, a doctor isn't something you just are, you have to earn the title) and is not just saddened but... humbled?... by her leaving, the Master shows up in EoT and is like Hey, my widow, did you miss me, hope you haven't remarried, that would be awkward to explain in the registry office :D!

*sigh* I suppose this is why tensimm is so special to me. It's 20 seasons of foil dynamic condensed into 5 hours. It really shows how thin the difference between the Doctor and the Master is. And how in the right circumstances, including the loss of the handy mirror villain to show how things can go wrong, a madman with a box can turn into an eldritch horror deciding the future of the universe. So, again, thank you so much for poining out yet another excellent parallel!

#ask #ahh i hope the answer was worthy of the ask because your analysis is so. good!#doctor who #doctor who meta #thoschei #tensimm #tenth doctor #simm!master #martha jones #lucy saxon #doctor who season 3

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esterzach · 8 months

Text

Second lesson

I have no shame. Feel free to ignore it. I know my English is not even close to enough to do this properly. Also ... Do I have the right to do this since I haven't read the books? I'd say after every screaming voice, that somehow all of a sudden became an expert in writing, a critic that felt obliged to shit over my favourite characters - this is incredibly satisfying. Again. I have no shame. For this at least.

Second lesson

Rand eyed her across the room, finally alone. The only other person in the spacious room was Moiraine. She was quiet, more than before, staring into the space, sipping from a small cup of tea. The young man swallowed. After everything that happened that day, Moiraine had said too little and he wasn’t exactly focused on her until now. His attention went to the storm of events, and to his friends, now gathered together in the same place. It was a long night, conversations, heated debates, accusations, revelations…

Not a few of the accusatory glances were aimed toward the Aes Sedai. For some of the little group, she was still an enigma and now they actually had something solid to blame her for. She had hidden the truth about Rand. No matter how much he had explained that it was his choice to leave them, that he was the one to ask Moiraine to make them believe he was dead, he doubted that they would soon believe him and stop being angry at her. But aside from the dirty looks thrown at Moiraine, most of them didn't dare to confront her.

Nynaeve… was a different story. Her anger was heard throughout the inn where they were all gathered. Even Lan couldn’t make her stop, although after a while he took her arm and dragged her outside in the corridor.

Moiraine remained silent. Perrin and Mat stared into each other, silently. The confusion and the distrust toward the Aes Sedai were palpable.

And Moiraine was just sitting there.

She looked pale and tired. On the light of the candles and fire from the hearth, her age seems even more elusive. A beautiful woman, but her delicate features were veiled with profound tiredness and sadness. Rand knew why. What he had seen and heard the previous day and last night was enough to have a much better understanding of what this woman was carrying. And yet, it was hard to imagine. Somewhere in his mind, the idea of Moiraine Sedai was changing. Reshaping. The fearsome image of the manipulative secretive woman shited toward something more familiar. More human. The icy facade had fallen.

For the first time since he met her over a year ago, behind the idea of an Aes Sedai, a woman has formed. A woman of flesh and blood, with heart and feelings. A human being, who was capable of hurting, of fear, of love.

Odd, he thought. He had seen her suffer before, he had seen her on the brink of death. He had watched this man hoover over her, her bodyguard, who warned him with a simple look, that whatever she thought he and his friends were, he won't hesitate to swing with a sword and slit their throats, if they dared even look at her the wrong way. He wondered back then what sort of debt or reason he had to walk after her like a loyal dog. What kind of a leash did she have on him so she held him so tight? Was he a servant, attached to her by orders from The White Tower? A lover maybe, who she had wrapped up in her nets years ago by an evil spell, that he fell victim somehow to her magic, and still hadn't realized that he sacrificed everything for someone who hardly ever even spoke to him. He had carried her unconscious body in his arms, tended her wound, and gave her water like a husband to a sick wife. And Rand still didn't quite understand.

He had seen her help and heal his father, then Mat. Maybe she really was on his side, he thought back then. And although some form of respect had formed in him, she was still an Aes Sedai. Never mind they all called her Moiraine, not even Moiraine Sedai. She had never insisted on that, never reminded them of her status. But he was way too wrapped up in himself and his own fears to notice. For him, she looked like some creature out of fairytales, or legends, not exactly real, dangerous, dark, and not at all trustworthy. Her powers intimidated him, and her plans and secrets made him suspicious. But last night he had stood in front of her to protect her from Lanfear's wrath. And there, for the first time, he saw her. Whatever happened between her and the Amyrlin seat, Rand was too busy to notice in the Palace. Their quarrel and the chilling prospect of their words were more than enough. His life and freedom were on the line. The fear that he had lost to the mighty Aes Sedai order had paralyzed him just as effectively as the shield Suan Sanche had put over him. Dark thoughts into a fog that blurred his senses kept him immobile, while he struggled to understand what was going on.

Then somehow he was free. Sheer luck, stars aligned, the whim of the Wheel, or it was a master plan from the woman in a blue dress, who was currently sitting there just a couple steps from him, but may as well be on the other side of the world.

Perin and Mat went to their rooms. They threw one last look at Moiraine, and still undecided how to treat her - if she was a threat or a friend, they left. Egwene needed healing, Elayne too. Moiraine took care of both of them. And they were resting now.

Yet the woman, who had spent at least the last several days with little to no sleep at all, trying to get him to Falme and had paid what seemed like quite the costs for her efforts, was still awake. Rand had learned what she had done for him. She was probably exhausted beyond words. He knew by now she wouldn't say anything. But she usually retrieved to her chambers. Now she was just standing there, in her chair, frozen, like a statue.

“Moiraine, I…” he felt he had to say something. But he wasn’t exactly sure what.

Even if he had heard him, she didn’t show it.

“I wanted to… say that… I am sorry.” He struggled with his words. Ancient prophecies or not, Dragon or not, he felt like a child, who had stepped into the middle of a fight between adults. And now was scared that it might have been his fault. She didn’t look at him. “For what?” came a question. Her hoarse voice was quiet and distant. “For… what happened last night.” He wasn’t sure if he had the right to speak of… it. There, at the Waygate, he had finally seen the woman behind the Aes Sedai. Not Moiraine Sedai, Lady Damodred, not a random blue witch or a sister from the bloody White Tower of Tar Valon. Moiraine.

Just Moiraine.

He had helped her last night. Her “thank you” filled with so much emotion, that humbled him. He didn’t have the time to think there since The Amyrlin had appeared. But now… Now, after the chaos had settled for the day, he had some time and quiet to think. And she was right there in front of him. Moiraine had been shielded. Not only that. Moiraine had been shielded for six months. He was shielded for a couple of hours and it felt like hell.

She had been carrying a shield for months.

What she had said to him in the Palace - it feels like you've lost everything that you ever were and everything you could possibly be. And with this nonchalant almost dismissive tone at that. As if it wasn't a big deal. Is that what it had been for her during all that time? She was running around, trying to get him away from Lanfear with just a knife, all alone. He briefly noticed that Lan wasn't with her. Since when she was alone? He had attacked her, thinking she had killed Selene! The stupidity... She has stood up to a Forsaken. Twice. For him.

No. Not for him. She believed it was for the whole world. She had dragged him around, and when he was about to drop from exhaustion and all he wanted was to sleep, she had said that this was not an option for her. How long has it been since that day? And all that time she had been powerless. Just a simple fragile woman. And Lanfear just threw them somewhere in the middle of nothing. The woman he trusted. He had trusted a Forsaken. Instead of the Aes Sedai who had saved the life of his friends.

Rand took a breath. Then he heard her:

“You removed the shield. For that I am thankful.”

He was about to protest, but she spoke again.

“Thank you for standing for me in front of Lanfear.”

He swallowed. That was sort of his fault too. Moiraine has agreed to his plan. But Lanfear… was slightly unpredictable. She had promised that the next time she saw him with Moiraine, she would kill her. It would have taken a flick of her wrist and… But that wasn’t what he meant either.

“I meant…” - his throat went dry. The fire cracked in the fireplace, and sparks flew around in the air. Muffled conversations from somewhere outside barely reached them. Otherwise, it was quiet. "The Amyrlin... She..."

“Don’t.”

The ice in her tone made him flinch. She had turned to him, he noticed it when he lifted his head to look at her direction. Then she added in an even more quiet voice, a whisper. "Please." She slowly shook her head and froze in place again. A distant memory from many months ago resurfaced - he had seen this face before. Back in the Blight, he had asked her if it was hard to leave Lan behind. She hadn’t spoken a word back then - her expression was oddly blank. She seemed far away, staring at the distance. Now she had the same look on her face. As if a wall was raised around her. Detaching her from the world. A safe place where she could hide her pain. But now he saw it. He had heard their conversation and the anguish in their voices. He had no idea that the terrifying Amyrlin seat meant something completely different for Moiraine. At first, he had thought they were close friends who grew up together like he had with Mat and Perin, had similar skills and experiences, shared the same view of the world, and were connected through The Tower. But... “If you ever loved me, don’t do this!”

It took him some time to understand the meaning behind the words.

“If you ever loved me”

Slowly her plea sunk in his brain. Words repeated in his head, voice cracking. The way she had said the name of the Amyrlin. The other woman did it anyway. The coldness in her voice like nothing he ever heard before snapped like a whip on a bare skin. Something big had happened there, he was able to understand this much. Something, that has shaken Moiraine to the core. The Amyrlin made her close the Waygate. She has accused Moiraine of lying and had spoken of an Oath... And somehow it was connected to him. The woman in front of him took a shaky breath. That was the only indication something was happening inside her. “Moiraine!” Lan's worried voice appeared from nowhere and stormed through the door. Nynaeve was right behind him. His whole attention focused on her. Nothing indicated trouble though. The pale woman just stood there, her back straight on her chair, and kept staring in front of her. Her eyes seemed fixed now in a certain spot but there was nothing in particular there.

Lan turned toward Rand and snarled.

"What did you do?"

"Nothing!", came the weak response.

Rand searched Nynaeve for help but she didn't look at him at all. Her attention was elsewhere. What he saw in her very much resembled guilt.

"What is wrong with her?"

"Stop talking, sheepherder!"

Rand was on his feet worried and guilty.

"Moiraine" , Lan's voice has changed. A sudden gentle tone appeared as if out of nowhere.

He took a step towards her. When he got close, he touched her shoulder carefully.

Moiraine exhaled. As if she had forgotten to breathe for a while there. She looked as if she was drowning just a second ago, and struggled to take a breath now. Her shoulders shook for a second.

"Moiraine! Look at me." It took her almost a minute, but she turned toward Lan. The glassy eyes barely registered that he was there. He was observing her, bowed before her as if trying to assess if she was somehow hurt. But her face showed nothing.

Lan leaned forward, he kneeled before her and their foreheads met. He closed his eyes, leading her to do the same. For a long moment, they stood like that. Not moving, not speaking. Only the muscles on Lan's face gave away a struggle, an effort, some underlying torture, that was left unseen by anyone else. Moiraine's face remained calm, almost serene. Then they both opened their eyes and looked at each other.

Her mouth twisted slightly. Brows knitted, and her chin quivered.

His hand went over her heart and remained there as if attempting to soothe an invisible wound.

"Oh, Moiraine!"

A strangled sound came from her.

Fear crept through Rand again. He didn't really understand what was happening before his eyes. What he saw was that the woman slowly was beginning to breathe more deeply and normally again. Her face though still taut, relaxed a bit, as she leaned into the man.

"Come on. Let's go get some rest."

She nodded.

He helped her stand up. But when she tried to take a step, her legs buckled, she swayed and stumbled. Lan grabbed her arm to steady her. One look at her and he nodded. With a swift move, as if he had done that many times before, he took her in his arms and lifted her. Her head fell on his shoulder immediately, she had closed her eyes and relaxed against him. The man carried her out with seemingly no effort at all. *** He stood behind the door for what seemed like ages, debating, arguing with himself. One part of him definitely screamed he had no right to go there, but the other was worried. Somehow he ended up worrying about an Aes Sedai. No. He corrected himself. Not an Aes Sedai. About Moiraine. Now his mind could see the difference. He knew that both were inseparable. But somehow they meant two very different things for him. There was no sound. Nobody has left the room for the night. It was almost dawn, but outside was still dark. Aside from the creaks here and there of wooden floors and beds, the whole building was quiet. Soft steps of the women who woke up early and started to roam around doing their daily chores could be heard. One of them approached, threw him a curious look, opened the door quietly, and entered the room. Rand hesitated for a couple moments but decided to use the opportunity. The woman left a tray with tea cups, water, and some food and left without a word.

Rand looked around in the semi-dark room. A few candles spread soft golden light but not enough to actually light up the room properly. His eyes finally landed on what he was looking for. There, on the thick mattress on the very floor, curled up under a blanket, the Aes Sedai was finally, finally asleep. Her face was now calm, she looked younger, even more beautiful than he remembered her. Behind her was her Warder, fully awake, his eyes fixed on the young man who just entered the room. His back against the wall, not moving a muscle, he was on his usual post - guarding his Aes Sedai dreams.

Rand finally understood him. The sudden urge to bow to this man startled him. A new respect for the Malkieri built within him. There was something else. Some other nagging feeling, unpleasant, underneath of it all. Shame. He was ashamed of his previous thoughts about this man.

"I just... wanted to see if everything is... I didn't want to..." Why all of a sudden his mouth refused to work.

"Learn to keep your mouth shut, sheepherder! That is your second lesson." Lan answered with a low voice. His face didn't change. There was no malice, nor anger. It was a simple statement.

"Is she… Is she going to be alright?"

"She needs sleep." He whispered. Rand nodded again. He turned around to leave the room. He heard Lan's quiet voice again behind him. "Sometimes it feels like she is carrying the world on her shoulders. Sometimes… this is actually true."

#Feel free to ignore #It's stupid and cheesy #I know #That is the naive side of me #esterzach's lack of better judgement #lan x moiraine #moiraine damodred #moiraine and lan #lan madragoran #The woman needs sleep #esterzach's writings

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resi4skz · 3 months

Text

A drabble because I had to write it down when I thought of it. Please don't mind my writing as I'm a new writer :(

Pairing: Chan(producer) x Y/N(female reader)

Title: Second Chances

When you know the person you love gets sweeped of her feet by another and all you....I can do is watch her be happy and in love. So much love that she invites me to her wedding as her bridesman. I couldn't refuse. Not when it's Y/N. She's my best friend and the only person who I relied on when my music career was starting off. She was there to pick me up when I had bad days. She was there to take care of me when I was sick as a dog and cured me till I was well enough to go back to work.

Now as I stand at the altar and watch her walk down the aisle. She was breathtaking. Her eyes shined holding the galaxy in them and the smile on her face brought a sudden boost of serotonin in everyone. She was like that. She was the one who cheered everyone up, including me. The room was brighter with her in it.

I catch her eyes and she smiles. It hurts. It hurts to know I never got to tell her my true feelings. I give her thumbs up as she walked to her husband-to-be, Shaun. They were in love, I knew that for sure. They met in her last year college and they hit it off right away. I had never seen her so happy. It hurt, my heart not be able to see her with him.

I watch as they read their vows and kiss, binding their future together. And then they both run outside, sit in a car and drive off to their lives together. Smiling, I watch the car fade into a dot. A tap on my shoulder brings me back to reality and turn to see her best friend and her boyfriend, Han, who's also my best friend too. "Will you be okay?" Luna asked.

"Yes," I replied, smiling and glance at Han. "I'll be fine."

"I know it must've been hard to see her go," Han said, patting my arm.

"Guys," I sighed. "It's not the end of the world. I've got my music and she got her happy ending. That's all that matters to me."

Or so I thought.

Because a few years later, I'm back in Korea. My music career took off and decided to move back to Seoul. It was a nice change for once and the environment took some time to get used to but knowing korean was a big advantage for me. It helped me a lot during the first few months here. I had help from Han as he also moved here with Luna and started their lives together.

On the way back to my apartment, I decided to stop by at the convenience store to buy some snacks. As I'm picking up a ramen pack, I freeze as I hear a familair voice. "Mom, I'm not going over with you on this one. Shaun and I are different now. It's best if-"

I hear her sigh. "Mom. I'm going to go. I'll call you when I know you won't berate me for picking a life that doesn't make me miserable anymore. Bye."

My eyes frantically search the store. It can't be. It can't be her. Then everything around me fades as I see her. Long black hair down to her back, wearing a very baggy shirt and tights that showed off her curves.

It can't be.

All the feelings and emotions that I had stored away come rushing back hitting me like a ton of bricks. All these years, I had always yearned for her. I wanted to be with her all the time. But now as she stand at the cash register speaking fluent korean, I'm rooted to my spot. Chan, you idiot, MOVE. It's only when she disappears from sight, that I sprint outside, after her.

"Y/N!"

She stops walking and turns around. Her eyes go wide. "Channie?"

Smiling, and nervous, I approach her. "Fancy seeing you here."

"Channie, what are you doing here?" She asked. A genuine question.

"I moved back here."

"Oh."

"What brings you here? Are you and Shaun visiting here?"

She blinks at me. Oh, way to go Chan, you just made her uncomfortable. "Shaun and I aren't together anymore."

"What?"

"Yeah, him and I didn't work out. He wanted different things. I wanted different things. So we decided to divorce," she replied.

"When?"

"Last May."

I take a step forward. "Why didn't you tell me?"

She shrugs her shoulders. "I wanted to but so much happened that I never got around to it."

She had eyebags under eyes and she looked like she hadn't been sleeping well. "Are you okay?"

Her eyes meet mine. "Yes."

But I knew her. She wasn't fine. "Starshine, you know you can't lie to me."

"Channie, I....I can't," she whispered.

Taking another step forward, I wrap my arms around her enveloping her in a hug. "It's okay. You don't need to put the tough act in front of me. You know I can see right through you, Starshine."

I hear her sob before her arms go around me. And she finally lets go.

-----------------------------------------------------------

A couple of weeks go by, Y/N and I have been meeting up for coffee and lunch almost every day, catching up on the lost time. "So, Mr. Producer, when do I get to listen to the songs you made?"

I sip on my tea. "Say when and I'll take you to the studio."

It was so cute seeing her eyes light up like a child given candy. I chuckle. "Can we go now?"

Glancing down at my watch, I nod. "Sure. Let's finish our drinks and I'll drive us to the studio."

20 mins later...

I open the door to the studio and walk inside, with Y/N trailing behind me. I hear her whistle. "Wow. You weren't kidding when you said your music took off. It really did take off."

I chuckled. "Impressed?"

"Very."

Something in my heart blooms hearing her say that. "Have a seat." I turn everything on and wait for the screen light up. Opening my MacBook, I open a file and click play.

The sound comes through the speakers sitting on the desk, the melody immediately playing. Then my voice comes on and I feel my ears warming.

I'm never letting go

Let's go on a little walk, see the world outside

Don't wanna let you go

The way that you give me your hands, I'll fly

At times when I feel down or empty

You're always beside me

Promise that I'll love you plenty

I hope this'll never end for eternity

Lowering the volume, I swivel my chair around, facing her. "So?"

"Is that you singing?"

"Yeah," I rub the back of my neck. "It's pretty bad, I know."

"Are you kidding?" She says, smiling. "Channie, you voice is lovely! Why didn't you tell me you also sing?"

I laugh nervously. "The topic never came up."

"So, you're not just good looks after all."

I whipy head at her. "What?"

She rolls her eyes. "Like you don't know how many girls threw themselves at you and you never even looked at them."

"So? It's not like I was looking for anything," I replied.

"Why not?"

"Y/N, you don't want to know," I turn back around and turn everything off.

"But why not? There are a lot of women that would kill to date you."

Sighing, I stand and turn around. "But I don't want to date them."

Now she stand up. "Is there someone you like?"

I don't reply to her question. "Oh my, there is!"

"Y/N, just...."

"Who is it?"

Sighing, I turn for the door but she stops me by grabbing my arm. "Let go, Y/N."

"Tell me who the girl is and I'll let go your arm."

"Y/N, I don't want to talk on such things." I close my eyes, trying to hold onto the thin thread of my breaking point.

"Channie, we're best friends. If not me, who are you going to tell?" I know she means well but then goes and tugs at my arm. The thread breaks and I turn around, gripping her arms, I swivel around her and shove her against the door. "Chan, wha-"

"I told you to drop it. I told you to leave it alone but you just had to test my patience." I step forward, invading her privacy. "You want to know who it is I like?"

Her cheeks turn pink but nods, blinking up at me.

"It's you," I confess and take a big step back.

"What?"

"It's," I laugh. "It's always been you, Y/N. Even before you got married." I look at her and immediately regret telling her. "I know this must be a lot to take in but I promise you, I will never act on my feelings because I know you don't feel the same."

Then in slow mo, I watch her walk up to me. "Pabo," she whispers as she leans up, placing her lips on mine. When she pulls away, she smiles at me. "Who told you I don't feel the same? I've had a crush on you since high school."

I blink, once, twice and three times. "What....uhm. What?"

She snorts, laughing softly. "I'll admit I fell for Shaun and we chose different paths. And after running into you again, I felt alive again. You made me be me again. Thanks to you, I'm looking forward to everything. Because if it weren't for you, I'd have ki-"

"Don't you dare say it," I growled. I place my hands around her neck, making her look at me. "Never say that."

"Okay," she says but it came out as a whisper. "Chan-"

I don't waste another second and crash my lips down on hers. I always imagined what kissing her would feel like. But this was beyond my imagination. He soft lips opened, letting me invade her mouth. She tasted like strawberries. So sweet.

We break apart, our foreheads touching. "This mesns our friendship is doomed."

She bites her lip and giggles. "Second chances are one of a kind, at least for me."

And she was right. Second chances are one of a kind. But for me, this was the only kind of love I wanted to keep and cherish for the rest of my life.

#chris bang #bang chan #christopher bang #stray kids bang chan #bang chan fanfic #stray kids #oneshot #fanfic #straykids #bangers

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startrekfangirl2233-writes · 5 months

Text

Catfish and Dog Cemeteries

Chapter Nine of Sweet Home Alabama

Jake ‘Hangman’ Seresin x OC (Linley Mitchell/Floyd), Bradley ‘Rooster’ Bradshaw x OC (Linley Mitchell/Floyd)

Description: The Annual Pigeon Creek Catfish Festival is always your favorite event of the summer. Being back here after seven years feels different. It should be a consolation that you're only going to be in Pigeon Creek for a few days more. But instead, another encounter with an old friend makes you question everything you thought you knew about your soon-to-be ex-husband. A chance encounter with the man himself makes you question everything else in your life, too.

Themes: love, attraction, angst, sex, cheating, lying

Warnings: discussions of grief, discussions of miscarriage, discussions of animal death

Word Count: 2665

A/N: This chapter is one of the saddest in this entire fic. I know, I know. It's awfully hypocritical of me to say that when most of Sweet Home Alabama (the movie) is really really sad. This is the chapter I sobbed while writing. It's also the first time Jake and Linley address the pain they have put each other through. I hope you love it!

Thanks to the gorgeous @desert-fern for reading over this chapter and smacking my imposter syndrome demon when it refused to give up.

AO3: Cross-posted here!

Wattpad: Cross-posted here!

My Masterlist

Previous Part | Series Masterlist | Next Part

Pigeon Creek's Catfish Festival is busier than you've ever seen it when you pull up and park your rental car on Main Street the next day. The festival used to be your favorite day of the summer, the one day during summer vacation when you could run free and eat as much candy and fried things as you wanted. You walk through the crowd on autopilot, walking down the line at the buffet until your plate is filled with all of the things you never actually let yourself eat anymore, and slip a twenty into the donation jar at the end of the table. The fried fish and steaming french fries had looked so good that you couldn’t stop yourself.

But as you stand in the grass with your plate in your hand, it reminds you of something else. Nobody in Pigeon Creek likes you very much. Everyone you know is chatting and laughing and enjoying the good food. Yet you’re still the outsider. Like you were before Jake became your best friend like you have been every minute of every day since you left town. Not a single person wants to meet your eyes. A part of you understands why. Jake was the golden boy of the town. Jake is still the town hero. You’re just the girl who threw him away.

Of course, what you don’t expect to see is Dorothy sitting at one of the tables with a baby in her lap. She’s the only person who doesn’t glare at you as you walk up.

“D’you mind if I sit here?” Gone is the confident Linley who took New York by storm. In her place is the four-year-old with a lisp who used to get pushed off of picnic tables because she was too different.

“Sure.” You sit silently, gratefully, smiling at the chubby-cheeked baby in Dorothy’s lap.

“I, um..” You’re captivated by the shocks of tiny dark hair and big eyes and the way the little sweetheart is waving their fists around. “I didn’t know you and Mickey had a baby.”

“Aww, yeah. When you came around the bank the other day, there wasn’t much time for us to catch up now, was there?” She hums to the baby for several long moments before turning all of her attention to you.

It occurs to you at that moment that maybe you were more than a little prejudiced yourself as a kid. You have more fun with Dorothy than you’ve had in years. Getting to eat good food and just be yourself probably helps, too. Every time you see her snuggle her daughter, it feels like your heart breaks a little more. You can’t turn back time or change history. Seeing the baby squeal as a calf licks her hand makes you smile.

“Y’know he went up there?” There’s a secretive smile on Dot’s face as she rescues the baby from having her frock eaten by a goat.

“Who?” You drag your eyes away from the kids playing in front of you and focus back on Dorothy. “Dot, who went up where?” When she just looks at you, the lightbulb goes off in your head. “Jake? When?”

“About a year after you left.” That little tidbit of knowledge hits like a dart hitting a bullseye on a dart board. “He doesn’t know that I know, but Mickey let it slip once.”

“Jake was in New York?” You sound like a stuck record, but you can’t believe that Jake ever went to New York. Jake has always hated the idea of the big city, much preferring the country to the city.

“He told Mickey he'd never seen anything like it.” Your heart is six feet under the earth.

“He realized straight off…” You’re leaning in despite yourself, some sick sense of curiosity expecting you to know, “That he'd need more than an apology to win you back. He needed to conquer the world first. He's been tryin' ever since.”

You didn’t think that you were so cruel a few days ago, standing in the middle of that fashion show back in New York. But now? Now, you feel like the worst person on the planet.

“That's why he kept sending the papers back.” Is the world spinning off of its axis, or is that just you? How is it that you can know someone for most of your life and that they still surprise you every time?

“Yeah, it's funny how things don't work out.” The baby starts fussing in Dot’s arms, and the sweet burble of sound puts a smile on your face.

“It’s funny how they do.”

You spend the rest of the day hanging out with Dorothy, smiling and laughing like a fool while playing with the baby. But it’s as night falls and the kids all go home to bed that excitement starts to course through your veins. The first twang of the guitar sets your feet tapping. For the first time since you came back to Pigeon Creek, you feel like you’re at home. With good music and even better alcohol in your hands, you finally feel free.

Of course, what you’re not expecting, even though you totally should be, is Jake and Bob walking up to the small gathering you’ve found yourself in. It’s almost like once Dot approved of you, everyone else did, too. He looks like sin, his worn jeans clinging to his thighs and a soft red flannel clinging to his broad shoulders. His eyes and hair glisten in the soft light, and if you were a younger, less encumbered woman, you would have climbed him like a tree. But as it is, your soul feels heavy, and your left-hand feels even heavier. The worst part isn’t just how you lost the love of your life. It’s in how you’ve lost your best friend, too.

You can’t look at his smiling face, not when it hurts to see him happy when you’ve never been sadder. So, instead, you fixate on the glass your beer is in. It’s crystal clear and gorgeous, and well, it’s glass like you’ve never seen in New York. Is it any wonder that you lift the glass to see if you can see the manufacturer? Of course, just as you lift up the glass, it’s Dot who notices what you’re doing.

“Oh, honey, you…” She giggles, looking at you, “You drink that from the top.”

“I know that, Dot. I’m just lookin’ to see who makes this Deep South Glass. I wonder if you can get it in New York?" You take a sip of your beer and sigh. "It's beautiful."

"D'you hear that, Jake?" There is mischief in Dot's voice. "Lin wants to know where she can find that snooty-faluty glass." Why's she asking Jake, of all people?

"Why ask me?" See that? That's why Jake Seresin was your best friend. He always knew exactly what you were thinking and had the courage to express the thought, too.

"Oh, I dunno. Maybe it's because…" You've only had a few sips of your beer, so you don't miss the glare Jake shoots at Dot. You don't know why he's keeping secrets, but you have a feeling it isn't for a good reason. "You're all spiffed up and all."

"Wait, y'all." You probably look as confused as you feel. "Am I missing something?"

But all of a sudden, the familiar tones of Sweet Home Alabama by Lynyrd Skynyrd echo across the dance floor. You can count on one hand the number of times you've passed on dancing to this song - and all of them have been when you were in New York. It's a right of passage, a way of life. A part of you is sure every 'Bama baby has been put to bed at night with a crooned-out rendition of this song since it came out. Already, you can feel the beat tapping your toes, but a part of you isn't sure if anyone will ask you to dance. You smile vaguely as Dot marches off to the dance floor, Jake in tow, leaving you standing at the edge of the dance floor yearning.

"Y'know, she says that I've got two left feet, but the truth is she's got no rhythm." You startle just a bit at Mickey's voice, though you smile when you hear the pure love in it for Dot.

"Why don't we show her just how well I can dance, then, Miss Linley?"

"It would be my pleasure, Mr. Garcia."

You're smiling from ear to ear as Mickey twirls you around on the dance floor. Your eyes flutter closed as you feel the beat in every hummingbird thud of your heart. But when you open them again, it feels like the world's standing still. The music is gone. There isn't another person on the dance floor other than Jake and you. He's got his hand on your waist, and your heart's not beating in time anymore. Your palms grow clammy, and your tongue feels like it's swollen in your mouth.

There is something unreadable in Jake's gaze as he twirls you once, twice, and then one final time before applauding for the band and walking away. You spend the rest of the night as far away from Jake as you possibly can. You know where he is; you always have. But it's different going out of your way to avoid him. Everyone's cleared out for the night when you finally see the sign for the dog cemetery.

Bear used to love clear nights like this, and something about it makes you remember him. His little plot is the newest, and it hurts to think of the puppy you bottle-fed lying six feet under the ground when you never even got the chance to tell him you loved him one final time.

"Hi there, boy." Your hands shake as you clear away a couple of twigs ensnared in his grave marker. "Sorry, it took me so long. I would have come sooner if I'd known you were sick."

Sitting here tonight, you don't think you can lie. Not to Bear. "Actually, that's probably not true. I've been pretty selfish lately."

Tears track hot down your cheeks as you remember the dog you loved with all of your heart. "Dogs don't know anything about that, do they, though? You were always like a big old pillow. Like when everything went pear-shaped…" Your voice cracks on the words because pear-shaped is an understatement for how your life splintered. "You never left my side. And then I just left you. I bet you sat there wondering what you'd done wrong."

"I told him it was my fault." You stand up so quickly that you nearly fall over. It's Jake because who else would it be when he's so close that you can smell his cologne and feel the heat radiating off of his skin?

"Quit bein' so nice."

"It's the truth." It's not. Not in the slightest. It was your fault. Your body, your mouth. Your fault. But you can't verbalize your words or how sorry you were for everything that you did.

"How come it has to be so complicated?" You sigh the words even as you wipe your tears away.

"What?" Despite his hatred for you, his voice is gentle, a melodic hum over the buzz of a summer night out in the country.

"The truth, life…" Finally, you trace your fingers over Bear's name. "This."

"He was one hell of a good dog, wasn't he?" You can only nod, moving to sit on a stone bench nearby. It's quiet for several moments, just you and Jake staring at the graves.

"You looked like you were having fun out there tonight." It's true, you did have fun. But it wasn't quite as easy as he thought it was to let loose.

"I'm happy in New York, Jake. But then I come down here and…” You gesture around you to all of Pigeon Creek. “This fits, too." Who are you trying to convince? Him? Or yourself?

"Since when does it have to be one or the other? You can have roots and wings, Lin." Not possible, not with your all-or-nothing life.

"Maybe I could just fly south for the winter." As if the Honorable Carole Bradshaw would ever let you do that.

He sits down next to you suddenly, warming the left side of your body as he gets close.

"Look." It takes you a bit to figure out what you're looking for, but when you see it, it makes you feel like a kid again. "There. Do you see 'em?"

"Only you. Lightnin' bugs." There's a childlike wonder on his face. This close, you can feel each exhale and can see the specks of amber floating in the green of his eyes

"You know, I still go out there sometimes. I see those big thunderheads rollin' in. It's like a religion." Of course, he still goes out on the beach in the middle of lightning storms.

But his confession has you spilling one of your own. "I had a dream about it the other night." You watch the lightning bugs track pinpricks of light through the dark night.

"It had me thinking, Lin. You ever wonder what would have happened if we hadn't have gotten pregnant?"

Your heart falls to your feet at his words. Please let him regret you, but not that sweet baby. Please, not your sweet baby. Your throat barely pushes out the sound as you whisper, "Jake."

"Just," His eyes are pleading, and the sight of the pain in his eyes blanks all the thoughts out of your mind. "Let me get this out before I can't. I thought that baby would be an adventure."

"And it took me a while to realize that it would have been your only adventure." Yup. The sound you hear despite the blood pounding in your temples is your heart shattering into infinitesimal pieces. "I just guess Mother Nature knew better, huh?"

Your hands make abortive movements in your lap. But you can't reach for him, not with the ring weighing your left hand down. "I was so ashamed, Jake. 'Cause I felt relieved. How selfish am I, huh? I lost our baby, and I felt relieved. I felt relieved. And I couldn't handle that. All of a sudden, I just needed a different life. So I left."

Your voice is so quiet you're not sure Jake can actually hear you.

"You’ve done really well for yourself. I'm proud of you, Lin." He's so close all you want to do is fall into him. But you can't. You can't.

"I'm just sorry I never danced with you at our weddin'." How does he make your heart feel so full that you're sure it's going to overflow?

"I'm sure this next one's gonna go better for ya." His hands are strong and warm and perfect as they cradle yours. But every press of his hands rubs the ring, Bradley's ring, into your hands. It feels like a brand, the guilt turning into a five-ton weight sitting there. And it's that itchy, heavy feeling that has you yanking your hands from his own.

"Jake, I can't do this." Who are you trying to convince as you walk away? Like so much of this conversation tonight, you're not really sure.

"I know."

Something about those words has you turning around. It's not a feeling or an expressed desire, but you still stand on your tiptoes and kiss Jake. Just once, you promise your traitorous heart. Just once. But he feels like home and tastes like it and smells like it. The electricity ricocheting through your veins makes you feel so good that you don't break the kiss until Jake does. Your lips are swollen, and you can barely breathe. But Jake? Jake just looks angry.

"Go home." Is it any wonder that you do so with your tail between your legs?

I DO NOT CONSENT TO HAVE MY WORK POSTED, TRANSLATED, OR PUBLISHED ON ANY SITES OTHER THAN HERE, ON WATTPAD, OR ON AO3 BY ME. IF YOU SEE MY WORKS ANYWHERE OTHER THAN HERE, ON WATTPAD, OR AO3, THEN THEY HAVE BEEN POSTED WITHOUT MY PERMISSION AND I WILL BE WORKING TO TAKE THEM DOWN.

Taglist:

@atarmychick007 @the-romanian-is-bae @lt-spork @buckysdollforlife @blackwidownat2814 @praline357 @seitmai @cheyrenee @trickphotography2 @abaker74 @marrianena-library @angelbabyange @temptest13 @kmc1989 @im-an-adult-ish @chaoticassidy @inkandarsenic @lynnevanss @shanimallina87 @khaylin27 @mizzzpink @emma8895eb @hookslove1592 @leahnicole1219 @djs8891 @sarahsmi13s @desert-fern @horseshoegirl @dakotakazansky @teacupsandtopgun @footprintsinthesxnd @thedroneranger @cherrycola27 @roosterforme @mak-32 @beyondthesefourwalls

#star writes #top gun fanfic #top gun fanfiction #top gun maverick fanfic #top gun maverick fanfiction #top gun imagine #sweet home alabama #a top gun au #star's sweet home alabama top gun au #jake hangman seresin x oc #hangman x oc #jake seresin x oc #bradley rooster bradshaw x oc #rooster x oc #bradley bradshaw x oc

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