Maybe related to that. I have seen a few coments in the AITA subreddit implying that there is an increase in fake ones because they are used to train AI in morality.

Oh good lord I'd hate to think what morality they're learning from reddit

Well now that's a new one on me, chat is this real

Sure am having to block a lot of people for calling posts fake, satire, ragebait, creative writing, etc, today! Sounds like it's time for a reminder not to do that, or to say you "hope it's not real," or anything else in that vein, if you would like to continue engaging with this blog!

AITA for being aggressive when my brother tries to hug me without consent?

Ok let me explain. Me and my family are physically close, we kiss each other on the cheek and hug and sit close a lot. I assume it's because our love languages are all touch but we all enjoy giving hugs.

There's the problem of my older brother however. He has always been a bit rough with me. We used to really clash when we were younger and get into actual fights, but now we both mellowed out. However there are times where it seems like he hasn't. He aggressively pats me on the back, head, and then calls me overdramatic when I say it hurts. I most of the times try to brush it off but sometimes I can get really snide or try to hit him back.

I try to stay quiet and ignore him most days, aside from typical talking and teasing. However, he has been asking for hugs from me. Normally I would love do to so! I'm a very cuddly person. He often just squeezes too hard or pushes me afterwards or is just too rough and calls me overdramatic when I complain. Whenever I try to avoid him or tell him I don't want to hug he blocks my way and gives me one anyways. I'm a bit of a dramaqueen so my parents don't always get involved.

This has led me to dread physical contact with him. Today he went in for a hug, and I refused. He said something along the lines of 'okay, but I'm doing it anyways" and tried to hug me, and I aggressively pushed him away outside my room and he hit the door frame. I tried to shut the door but he held it open and asked me why I did that and said I needed to behave properly. I told him that he was the one who didn't behave properly by trying to go in for a hug without permission. He then shut the door and left.

AITA?

AITA for not turning in an assignment I got an extension on due to depression/dissociation?

I took this college class and actually had a really good time in it and respect the teacher a lot. However a lot of our grade depended on an essay. My teacher gave me an extension due to extenuating circumstances (grandparent died leading me to have a really bad depressive episode with dissociation so bad I kept forgetting what day/time it was and missing class).

They gave me like a 2 week extension and despite trying to work on it everyday (some days literally not letting myself go to bed until I did it, which just ended in me not sleeping), taking prescribed Adderall, and trying a variety of study strategies, I was unable to finish it in time. I passed the class, barely, but it doesn't really matter too much because it's not in my major.

However I feel really bad because they went through the effort to give me an extension and I didn't do it. I really liked their class and kinda want to take more classes from them as electives because it was really fun, but feel guilty about this.

Not even asking for myself because I don't use Reddit, but is someone allowed to post an AITA to Reddit and then post it here as well, or is it original content (so to speak) only here?

If you'd like to post your own story to both places, feel free! We have no non-compete clause here on Am I The Asshole Official. But I do ask that you only submit your own stories here, or ones from others that are being submitted with their knowledge and consent, rather than crossposting stories from elsewhere about people you don't know.

Not trying to be rude, but why do you allow fandom posts if you don't want people to speculate whether it's real or fandom?

Normally that's not an issue because of the way I ask for fandom posts to be formatted, leaving no doubt as to what they are. Having a little joke sometimes about the blorbos is great! 300 notes of arguing whether this is Samdean Castiel or not? Excruciating. I'm not saying never say it ever, I'm just saying have the first idea what you're talking about before you pop off.

AITA - I invited my brother to my work event but he is also my friend's ex, she also works with me.

So my brother (M 45ish) lives about 6 states away, I (F 31) see him 3-4 times a year if he has time to come, he has a busy life so it varies how often he's able to visit. This upcoming visit he plans on coming in during a huge work event where my workplace is hosting at an amusement park, the place is not small in any sense of the word. I really want to attend because on a normal day I can't afford to go to this place but I got some free tickets and they are letting us buy additional at a discounted rate. So I invited our while family thinking it would be a great activity for everyone and I can still get to spend time with my brother while having fun. Today, I get a message from my friend (F 27) that works with me telling me that I have no consideration for her feelings, I intentionally picked the same time as her, and I was just trying to hurt her. Here's the problem, I didn't even know about her plans to go until after I extended my invitation to my family. I truly think if I told them "oh sorry, none of you can go because our brother's ex has a problem with it" that sounds ridiculous. So I wasn't backtracking after already inviting them. Then we decided we wanted to go in the evening because we have company exclusive ride time from 8-11 and none of us want to stay there all day just to be there for that so we said we'd go around 5, which is when my friend decided to go. My brother just got married to his best friend and I understand she is hurt but they have been broken up for almost a year now and she's angry that I invited him because seeing him and his "bitch ass wife" as she put it would ruin her entire day. She genuinely even threatened to ruin our entire day if I actually bring him then called me selfish. She asked me how I would feel if she brought my ex (low blow mind you, that was a 4 year abusive relationship and then he shot himself in front of me. Hes now disabled in a nursing home) I told her that seeing him wouldn't bother me because I've worked past that with my therapist and I've learned to be bigger than that, I refuse to let seeing him hurt me. She asked and I gave her an honest answer about how I truly felt. Apparently, that was an attack on her because I was then called a cunt and told not to talk to her. I never once called her names during this entire conversation, I'm not that person. I even offered a solution of sharing my live location so we can avoid each other but that wasn't enough. She just wasn't going to be happy if he went. So in a sense of things, she's trying to make me pick sides but her choosing to have a relationship with someone states away that didn't work out isn't something that I feel I should have to be in the middle of. AITA?

Am I to assume that includes comments like, "I feel like this is a fandom post, but don't recognize it." ?

Not disagreeing, just clarifying

Those are more borderline--I don't love them, but probably won't ban over it unless you're being an asshole about it. I will say, however, that they are the opposite of helpful unless you have a specific thing that you KNOW it's trying to riff on. If I never have to see another submission about a roadtrip where the notes are full of people arguing whether or not it's Supernatural, it'll be too soon

wibta if i reblogged "relatable" posts abt a disorder i dont have?

im a singlet and my life partner(s) have DID, and since we are really close i know a LOT abt their system and DID in general, and they sometimes rant to me abt their socmeds so i also know something abt online system communities. i follow a few systems bc their content slaps, and sometimes they reblog/make posts abt DID that i find funny. im just wondering if it would be weird if i reblogged a post or two when they come up on my dash??

WIBTA if I asked my partner to (slightly) open our relationship?

I (26F) am poly and my partner (29M) is monogamous. When we first got together we had a conversation about our views and I said that I would give the whole monogamy thing a try—for the record we've been together for about 5 months now—but I'm the kind of person who requires a lot of attention.

That being said, I really only want to slightly open our relationship; I have no interest in having sex with anyone else, I just want more options for people who can give me the kind of attention I want (which is a different kind than regular friends would give). I want to be able to flirt with and go out with others but it wouldn't be any more than maybe some kissing and light petting.

I love my partner very much, and I don't want him to feel like he's not enough or whatever, I just think it's unfair to expect one person to have enough time in their day to give me the amount of attention I need and still have a life of their own, and being poly with multiple partners definitely helps with that.

I'm mostly afraid that if I bring the subject up he'll be hurt, and I definitely don't want that, but I'm also afraid that if I don't I might come to resent him for the situation.

Aita for making my partner feel bad about sex?

NSFW Warning for this one, tl;dr at bottom. Sent in May 26th, 2024, goat to locate later

🐐

I (23FtM) have been with my partner “Jake” (25M) for about seven months now. We met at work, were friends for a while, and decided to start dating after we realized we had feelings for each other

Please let me say that Jake is a good boyfriend. He takes me out, we share big purchases, our families get along, and he’s always been super supportive of me in the ways he can be. I would also like to say that I haven’t medically transitioned yet and very much do NOT pass as a man. Despite this, he’s never misgendered me and he’s always been really good about making me feel masculine.

So not long into our relationship, I disclosed to him that I have vaginismus (or whatever it’s called), and it means that I can’t really be on the receiving end of penetrative sex until I do some muscle therapy for my downstairs. Like it hurts when I try to insert anything into myself, always has since I was younger. No tampons, no fingers, especially no penises. Jake said this was fine and that he had confidence in his ability to make me feel good in other ways

Well… it’s been six months and I’ve never actually finished. He bought me a little rose toy to use, but he never grabs it while we’re intimate and when he does try to use it, he fumbles with it and decides not to use it and that me doing oral on him would just be easier. I can understand that for a quickie, we won’t have time to find what buttons to push that’ll make me finish, but most of the time we’re home alone, my roommates are out, and we’ve got all night.

And before anyone says anything: I have brought this up before. First time was what led him to buying the toy. It’s a good toy, I guess, but it does what my fingers would already do and he never takes the time to learn how to use it properly without hurting me. Second time I brought it up, he got really apologetic and asked me to use the toy while he touched himself next to me. I think that was the first time I finished in proximity to his body in our entire relationship. It didn’t feel good. Several friends pushed me to talk to him again, so I did.

I went to his place, Jake lives with his mom still, and I was trying to find a good place to talk to him, but he kept talking about work or his sisters or would turn on an anime that he knew I liked. The day ended with me giving him oral and then me going home. It almost seemed like he was going to reciprocate, but he hesitated and rolled off me. It really hurt my feelings, but I chickened out of telling him since he looked so happy to spend time with me.

Yesterday, he came over and I was finally able to squeeze in a joke about him being a “pillow princess” and his reaction was to get worked up and initiate sex to “prove” he wasn’t. It went the same as every other time - oral - him receiving, fumbling with toy, and then giving up. But he was smiling like he had done something revolutionary in our relationship and I just. Stared at him. He asked me what was wrong and I said hadn’t finished. He had a sad face now and said that there really wasn’t “much I can do while you’re, you know” while gesturing to my genitals.

I felt like crying, but I didn’t want to be the boyfriend who started crying over every little thing, so I just agreed with him and we cuddled until I drove him home. Before meeting Jake, sex was never a large part of any of my relationships. Half because I’m on the asexual spectrum, half because of my condition, so this would be my first serious sexual relationship. I love Jake, I love him so much, he was there for my when my mom passed away last year, and he was there for my college graduation.

On the drive back, he was really quiet so I asked him if he was alright. He said he was really hurt by my pillow Princess comment and asked me if I could take it back, that it made him feel like a bad boyfriend. I apologized for him feeling bad, but I didn’t outright take back what I said. He got out of my car still sad and I returned home feeling like k was gonna throw up.

So now I’m writing this to see if I fucked up. Maybe I should have been more assertive with my needs, maybe I should be more compromising so that everyone feels good. Idk.

TL;DR: I called my boyfriend a pillow Princess because he’s never made me finish during sex while I’m always serving him. He got upset and said I was calling him a bad boyfriend. Aita?

Amita for getting with one of our friends? (👥🧑‍🤝‍🧑)

My (23nb) bf (22m) 'sam' had to go long distance last summer bcs we couldn't find a place to live that would take his dog, so he went back to Scotland to 'free' is dog from his gran's semi-neglect. I stayed in the town we went to uni in as I had a year left still. Nearly all our friends graduated at the same time apart from 'jack'.

Jack (22m) has basically been my only regular human contact for socialising over the last year, and somewhere we both developed feelings for eachother. We only acted/discovered them when Jack's (ex) gf accused us of having an affair and the jokes became serious quickly.

I am poly and Jack has realised he is too recently, Sam has known I'm poly for a few years now but I've really acted on it. Sam had the boundary of wanting to be told, which I did when Jack and I made out. Sam was enthusiastic towards us until he came down to visit me and saw it wasn't just a fling.

I asked Sam in person if he was still ok with this and if he'd be ok with jack and I dating, which he said yes. When Sam returned to Scotland, he messaged me expressing feelings of jealousy and feeling left out, but also changed his boundaries where he didn't seem as ok but kept saying "do whatever makes you happy. He expressed that the idea of jack and having sex makes him "horrifically uncomfortable" and wouldn't really want to know, but I don't know if this is him being sex-repulsed asexual. I haven't had the chance to have a follow up convo as we've both been busy working, but because Sam has said "I can't stop you living your life" we've still just been continuing.

We nearly had sex (PIV) but didn't follow through bcs of other issues. I've been feeling a bit iffy since as Sam has given wishy-washy boundaries so I don't know if I'm crossing them and being the asshole or not

WIBTA for telling my boyfriend to tone down the sexual jokes around my younger sister?

Pretty much what it says on the tin. My boyfriend, 18, has a very raunchy, sometimes dark, and kind of immature sense of humor. I'm personally fine with it, but he is CONSTANTLY making sexual jokes and references around my little sister, 13. She already makes similar jokes with her friends -- albeit to a much toned-down and lesser degree, especially compared to my boyfriend -- but those usually start and stop at smash-or-pass jokes. His jokes go anywhere from penis puns to piss kink mentions. The last joke he made was just talking about penis. I do not want my little sister talking about penis with her friends.

For the record, he's ace and fairly open about what he does and doesn't want from our relationship, so I'm almost entirely certain he isn't projecting with the kink jokes or anything. I don't want him to think I'm trying to be mean to him or put him down for his sense of humor, but I just really don't like that he's making sex jokes around someone who's only barely old enough to even use the internet, especially kink-related ones. WIBTA for asking him to at least make somewhat less explicit jokes around her?

Have there ever been times where you strongly disagreed with the majority consensus on an ask?

Oh absolutely

AITA for refusing to help my roommate make a phone call?

📞 🏳️‍⚧️ 🪛 to find later

My roommate (33 ftm) recently made a phone call to a technician to fix an appliance and was told that a tech wouldn't be available until Monday. He then asked me (25 mtf) if I could phone them again and see if they would respond differently because he says he was "socialized female" and doesn't know how to sound masculine enough for people to listen to him, I'm a little dysphoric about my voice so him saying that I sound manly kind of hurt a little so I said I wouldn't call them and that he was being rude to expect me to handle service tech calls just because I have a deeper voice than him

What do you do if you get two almost identical submissions in a short time span (that seem to be from different people.) Do you post them both or only one of them, since they would probably get the same verdict?

Hasn't happened yet! I'm not sure, given the breadth and variety of human experience, we could get two truly identical submissions in short order like that

WIBTA if I asked for money instead of a car? (This one is low-stakes)

🚙💨

I have a car that I really, really love. A 2006 Ford Fusion. It's not a cool car, it's not fast and shiny, but it is my very first car and I love it. I've had my first taste of freedom in that car, I've cried in that car, brought my late cat to her final vet appointments... And it always starts right up for me.

However, it will need some work done in the upcoming year. New battery, new fuse balls, new timing belt... This will be close to 1000 euros within a year from now, and I already spent 600 last month just to keep it going. And that's on top of the running costs of heavyweight car tax, as well as the higher cost of the more high-quality gas my older car needs.

My parents are getting a new electric car and have offered their Hyundai i20 to me for free. (For free!) I'm incredibly grateful of course but I am finding it very hard to sell my own car.

Relevant: due to illness, my financial future is uncertain and the smaller Hyundai with better gas mileage and lower weight tax would be beneficial. It is also great to pocket the sales cost of my Ford. This is the reason my parents offered me their car.

My parents are financially secure, but they are not wealthy by any means and will probably have a hefty mortgage until they die.

I also used to complain about my Ford because the cabin filter didn't work and so driving around in it gave me migraines (inhaling highway car exhaust is bad for you). But I recently found that replacing the cabin filter is doable. Also, I can in fact use the cheaper gas in my car so maybe the mileage cost isn't THAT bad.

Tumblr, would I be a total asshole if I asked my parents for the money they got out of selling their Hyundai instead of the car itself? Like, hey thanks for offering me your car but I'd rather have the cash? I feel like it would be rude, but they are offering it to me for free anyway so financially it will make no difference to them, and I will get to keep my beloved Fusion.