it’s called self sabotage baby and i do it so well

Dress to Impress - Willow

In case you were wondering where I've been for the past few weeks, I've been learning how to use Blender.

Follow my (mostly NSFW) exploits on the twitter I made for this

Shame that the translation links are broken for those very old posts

So, for context, they're singing "I Won't Say I'm in Love" from Hercules in, fittingly, Greek (for Ren) and, interestingly, Mando'a (for Shae), respectively.

teamlarl·:

He couldn’t help but wonder how they might sound to an outside observer. They were in harmony with each other, singing the same tune, the same song. Yet, they were doing it in entirely different languages. It worked, he felt. It was a duet, after all.

“Synechízete na arneíste poioi eíste kai pós aistháneste.”

His own singing began to increase in volume as Renatus really started to get into it, a wide grin adorning his face. His hands, resting on her hips, began to mouth south as he idly stroked her thighs. Leaning forward, close enough that their lips were almost touching, he continued.

“Moró, den agorázoume. I agápi, eídame na chtypísei to anótato ório. Antimetopíste to san énan enílika. Ótan tha pas na paradechtó óti eísai erotevménos?”

She gave a happy sigh as he sang, and couldn’t help but let her hands drop from his shoulders to meet his hands. She smiled wider, staring into his eyes with clear adoration, a moment she hadn’t allowed herself since… Since last time they fought.

Funny. Two souls with such disharmony singing a near perfect duet in different languages. A dance they both know by heart, with their own twists.

“Nayc uhava, nu draar Ni malyasa'yr va dira id, nayc, nayc.”

Her eyes slid shut again, and she leaned forward to press their foreheads together. “Sha katktas dayn raoye Ni malyasa'yr va dira Ni cuyir o'r kar'taylir darasuum.”

Nayc pavarnr nu draar Ni malyasa'yr va sirbur bic, nayc nayc (tba'a gar beten tion'jor va bic er er) Bic b mr ruyot Ni malyasa'yr va sirbur Ni cuyir o'r kar'taylir darasuum  Ni mirdir ner kar'ta ganar hibirar rie ragiu'r Bic aalar bid jate tion'tuur gar ohira dayn Ner kovid cuyir jair ‘Pabida srasadr b'ami'r’ Katkta va gar cuyir kurya'yr at bria gar kar'ta dayn

Well, in Civ 6 each civ has its own unique bonuses, improvements/districts/units whatever, but they also have a unique bonus based on the Leader you pick.

America under Teddy Roosevelt gets bonuses from breathtaking tiles and natural parks.

America under Abraham Lincoln gets free units for every industrial zone building, but plantations make his cities lose loyalty.

I had some ideas about what some of the Larl cast would be like as Leaders. The Renatus one is pretty straightforward: In civ 6 you gradually go up in Alliance levels with your allies, and you also accumulate Great People points towards things like Great Generals, Great Artists, Great Merchants etc.

There's also a meter called the era score meter, if you fill it before the era ends, you get a normal era, fail and you get a dark era, exceed it by a certain amount and you get a golden era, get a dark era and THEN a golden era and the benefits are tripled: a Heroic Era.

My idea for Renatus was to represent the huge Nicator family tree you used to post:

Whenever a new era starts, Ren's player gets [insert number here] of great people points for each woman leader he's in an alliance with, the number increasing based on alliance level and the quality of the era he's going into.

So if he had a low level military alliance with Liane and entered a normal era, that might get him a great general, a kid by Liane.

If he had a alliance with Blake, it might get him a spy.

With Willow, a great merchant, or maybe two.

But in dark eras? no points. Ren makes no kids. Truly a dark era.

Okay I'm following. And that sounds like it would be genuinely fun to be, as far as Civ goes. An interesting dynamic for a civilization playthrough.

And I appreciate that you've defined a Dark Era to be an era where he's not having kids. Truly, the darkest timeline.

Does mun play Civilization six? Because I have a lot of thoughts about Team LARL and that game.

It's been a while, but I played the Civ games back in the day. I was more of a Civ V kid though. Couldn't really get into 6 with all the changes it made.

am i bitter? yes. but do i try to move on and let go of past anger? well, actually, no

Oh hey nine what's up LOL

Black Hole Sun

Did he stand a better chance in the forest? Renatus doubted it. The forest held men with guns that wanted nothing more than to cut down his ambition in its infancy. Even if this witch (of which he was skeptical about but would not dismiss out of hand) were more powerful and deadly, she was also more ambivalent.

At least, compared to an enemy army. She would not kill him instantly, anyway. And a stay of execution was perfectly fine in his books. Anything to give him more time to plot his way out of this mess.

"Have you?" Renatus quipped back. Maybe it was unhealthy to trade barbs with a so-called witch, but who was he if not ready to have a verbal joust at the drop of a hat? "I've always found that eating people is enjoyable for all parties involved, assuming you do it correctly."

Yes, definitely unhealthy.

"But as pleasant as standing in your doorway and gazing at your beatific visage is, one shouldn't waste time, yes? So I'd like to request refuge. Shelter and food. A place to recover before I set out back my side of the front lines."

He piqued an eyebrow at the admittedly gorgeous woman.

"You have noticed that there's a war raging on your doorstep, yes?"

If he was being perfectly honest, probably stupid. But there was no need to answer honestly. Not yet. Why shoot himself in the foot immediately?

For millennia, there had been rumors of a witch in these woods. Legends, even. There was a time when Renatus Nicator would have dismissed such legends out of hand, calling them just that - myths. Bedtime stories to frighten children.

He knew better now. There was always a grain of truth in such myths, weren't there? Some more than others. A desert's worth of truth vs a mere hourglass. The sands trickling down, falling between his fingers.

"Was there any doubt?" Renatus responded instinctually. It came naturally to him - that desire to take control of the situation. Especially in scenarios where he was anything but. "For is not survival the worthiest reason of all?"

It had been a rout that had driven him this far, through this precarious route. The scouting team that he had foolishly joined, believing there was no real risk and therefore could use the morale boost of having him join along, had been slaughtered to a man. Leaving him, their commander and general, the only survivor. For however long that lasted.

The enemy soldiers that had massacred his troops had refused to venture into the forest. For reasons Renatus understood, but did not much care for. They had been locals, he presumed. Superstitious. Unwilling to step foot in the witch's woods.

It wasn't that Renatus wasn't wary of the supernatural, but rather, he weighed his odds against the witch existing vs the very real bullet that would be put through his head. Not much of a choice, really.

"I do hope you don't intend on gobbling me up." Renatus commented sardonically. "But I promise I taste much better well rested and properly fed."

If he was being perfectly honest, probably stupid. But there was no need to answer honestly. Not yet. Why shoot himself in the foot immediately?

For millennia, there had been rumors of a witch in these woods. Legends, even. There was a time when Renatus Nicator would have dismissed such legends out of hand, calling them just that - myths. Bedtime stories to frighten children.

He knew better now. There was always a grain of truth in such myths, weren't there? Some more than others. A desert's worth of truth vs a mere hourglass. The sands trickling down, falling between his fingers.

"Was there any doubt?" Renatus responded instinctually. It came naturally to him - that desire to take control of the situation. Especially in scenarios where he was anything but. "For is not survival the worthiest reason of all?"

It had been a rout that had driven him this far, through this precarious route. The scouting team that he had foolishly joined, believing there was no real risk and therefore could use the morale boost of having him join along, had been slaughtered to a man. Leaving him, their commander and general, the only survivor. For however long that lasted.

The enemy soldiers that had massacred his troops had refused to venture into the forest. For reasons Renatus understood, but did not much care for. They had been locals, he presumed. Superstitious. Unwilling to step foot in the witch's woods.

It wasn't that Renatus wasn't wary of the supernatural, but rather, he weighed his odds against the witch existing vs the very real bullet that would be put through his head. Not much of a choice, really.

"I do hope you don't intend on gobbling me up." Renatus commented sardonically. "But I promise I taste much better well rested and properly fed."

@teamlarl

humans often fit into one of two categories for the witch- fascinating and stupid, and more often than not they were fascinating in their stupidity. it was always fun to see which category those who wandered into her forest were though- some were brave and knew what lurked in the tree's shadows, others were simple travelers that took a wrong turn and got caught in her wards and illusions, and then there were the scant few that came with actual purpose. those ones were far more rare these days, especially given her tendency towards keeping to her solitude compared to lifetimes passed, but every now and again there would be someone that would brave her forest in search of something or other. whether or not she could or would give it to them was always up for debate and varied depending on her mood at that point in time. if they caught her on a bad day then whoever it was that came knocking on her door would be lucky to leave with all parts of themselves still attached.

solana watched the man trudging through the dark forest through the eyes of one of her crows, humming somewhat as she debated on whether to give him a hard time or not. it was entertaining to watch them get turned around by her illusions, or get spooked by the sounds of the various animals that prowled by, but she had found herself rather bored of late. and it wasn't as if she was terribly worried- it was just a man after all, and he was in her domain. with a flick of her finger she dropped a few of the wards that barred direct passage to her home, placing them back up the moment he passed through so that if there were somehow anyone following him they would be denied the access that she was grating this one. once he was on the path she had opened she returned to her own senses and went and made herself a cup of floral tea before sitting at her kitchen table, and when finally there came the knock on her door she allowed it to open up to the man, though she paid more attention to her drink than she did to him.

" i assume you have good reason for coming this far- and if you don't then you're either incredibly brave or incredibly stupid. so- which is it ? "

carmine eyes finally raised to meet his own, bemused smirk playing upon her lips.

Let it be in the records

Bubblez talked such hot shit and then SURRENDERED

u can have 2 boops for being so cute :3

Don't start a war you won't win, Bubblez

"You know, I always liked Vale. It's where I picked up my name - Liane. Means "daughter of the sun" in one of their dialects. Sigh, but Salem got 'em."

"She got them? What do you mean they got them?"

"She got 'em."

"I just got a missive from Lyra Evergreene last WEEK, what do you mean she got them?"

"She got 'em."

"...Fuck this, Liane."

designed some parents and a little sister for pyrrha