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#doing the posting in them tags OF COURSE IN WOULDN'T RE

spacebarbarianweird · 6 months

Note

Astarion with Bard!Tav headcanons, pls?

I have a soft spot for Bards. Once, a gender fluid bard who plays the same campaign as I do, scared a creep away and we never saw him again.

Thanks @thedomesticanthropologist for the dialogue. With her permission, I copied it here since it fits the mood of these two gremlins .

Check out her blog, it's amazing!

Hope you will enjoy these headcanons!

Masterlist

Headcanons

Astarion x Bard!Tav

Astarion is ready for everything when he meets you, but not for the fact you are the most unhinged person the Sword's Coast has seen.

The sworn enemy of many nobles whom you have offended in your songs.

Thrown up from numerous adventure parties for your horniness and a specific type of humor.

if you aren't beaten by someone's spouse for sleeping with a married person, you consider it a bad week.

All the Astarion's flattery? It falls flat!

There is nothing original in what he says. Nothing really interesting in his sweet words!

You could flirt better when you're five.

But you are curious.

Why is he using such cliche pick-up lines on you? Why is he so eager to do it? It's obvious he has no communication skills whatsoever! And hee sounds like a character from an erotic novel.

You are a professional, after all. If you wanted to seduce him, you would have sex the first two hours you two met.

So... you are waiting.

In the meantime, Astarion starts opening up. The real him is so much different from the 'seducer one". He sounds even innocent.

He finally invites you for a night of passion and, at this moment, you can't hold yourself anymore.

"I've been waiting… waiting since the moment we met…"

"So knives to the throat are flirting to you?"

"... I do recall saying it was a darling of a throat or some such, but- it's a line, it's not- you're not supposed to be really listening-"

"So I'm just supposed to be so distracted by your shirtlessness that you can say anything and I'll fall into your arms?"

"Listen, if I wanted to spend the night talking…"

"Couldn't you even bring a blanket? Give me the address of the person who taught you all this boring shit, and I will put my lute up to his arse! Gods!"

The date night is awkward.

You even don't have sex. You talk.

And you play your lute, singing some of the most offensive and inappropriate songs you know.

Astarion allows himself to relax.

He has never felt so safe with anyone. You can laugh all his fears away!

Vampire lords, tortures, violence. It all sounds … hilarious, not scary.

By the morning, you fall asleep. Astarion puts off his shirt to bathe in the sunlight.

When you wake up, you curse out loud.

"What is the fuck is this on your back??"

He explains and you take your lute to play one of the bard healing spells.

It wouldn't help of course, but you soothe his pain a bit.

You use the spells to cast away nightmares. And you also play music to help him meditate and avoid re-visiting bad memories.

Together, you form a murderous couple. There is nothing worse than a bard and rogue.

And you boost his self-esteem. He is afraid of Cazador, he is scared of him. But you -

You compose the most catchy and offensive songs about him.

They are pretty good, by the way, and some bards, including Volo, add them to their repertoires.

At first, it causes some anxiety to Astarion as if he can be punished for your actions.

But soon his fears start fading.

If it's funny, it's not scary.

Together, you defeat Cazador - and you've polished your vicious mockery!

When Astarion is finally okay with intimacy, you have a wild graveyard date which ends up with you two being arrested for disorderly conduct.

Post-game your destiny is decided. You are a traveling bard, after all.

You travel throughout Swords' Coast - singing songs and robbing your audience.

Tag list

@tugoslovenka @marcynomercy @wintersire @vixstarria @not-so-lost-after-all @ashiro20 @theearthsfinalconfession @herstxrgirl @starlight-ipomoea @micropoe10 @astarion-imagine-archive @veillsar @elora-the-slutty-songstress @fayeriess @lumienyx @astarion-beloved @tallymonster @caitlincat-95 @tragedybunny @valeprati

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olderthannetfic · 1 month

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https://www.tumblr.com/olderthannetfic/747721307928559616/re-747330342209404928-every-time-a-discussion?source=share

I wouldn't even make this purely about oversensitivity - I've seen fic writers refuse to tag, say, breakup because they think it would be a Good Experience (tm) for fans of the ship in question to read it (because they often think it's Problematic in some brain-wormed way), or they just think their writing is so good or so "socially important" that people who would normally avoid this commonly tagged trope should have to experience it anyway, "it's good for you" etc. and then melt down when people have the predictable reaction that something that seemed to be billed as a fluffy romance was anything but, and of course, these people's social statements are never as deep and sophisticated as they think they are. These people are weirdly, often very outspoken about the need for Content Warnings in basically any other context.

Obviously, I don't want to say that anything other than major archive warnings are a requirement to tag (and I mean, even those aren't required, you can use CNTW), or that you're required to indicate a breakup will happen if it's a big spoiler or something.... but this wasn't just that, it was deliberately false advertising the fic as something it wasn't bc they thought it would be morally edifying or something for people who dislike that trope to read it.

I like fanfiction and I'm not going to say it can never be effectively used to convey Important Ideas (tm) .... but I do think if you are going to take this attitude and especially if you're over the age of 15 or so, and especially if you're then going to have a meltdown and accuse people of "harassment" for disagreeing with you when the readers are predictably not happy, you need to consider that perhaps fanfiction is not the medium for you. Maybe write original fiction instead.

I don't know why it's so hard for some to understand that people tend to be more allowing for a story not being as happy or fluffy as they expected when the story isn't about characters they're already attached to, especially when they're in a space that's often about seeking out specific outcomes that the original work didn't give them. Like I'm sorry there's often a double standard between fanfic and original fic in this way, but it exists for a way.

But also, none of these fanfic writers I've seen do this (and this sounds niche I know but I've seen it several times in different fandom) ever actually have Takes that are remotely original or startling or groundbreaking, lol, such that it's worth misleading people because they "need to hear." It's always like.... cool, I saw this take for the first time on a Tumblr post in 2017/from someone in my women's studies class in 2010, and I thought it was a bad shallow take then and still do.

Interestingly, the people who genuinely have really interesting and unusual and thought-provoking takes that they use fanfic to express feel no need to tag it inaccurately, feel no desire to force it on people who don't want to read it. Wonder why.

Hah. I too have seen this silly behavior many times.

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hms-tardimpala · 8 months

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A statement on ficbinding (according to me)

I've joined the book/ficbinding tag on tumblr a couple of weeks ago, and in that time I've seen some confusion and concern about what ficbinding is, so I thought I'd post a statement of how I see ficbinding and why I do it. (If you're an author and I redirected you to this post because I want to bind your fic, hiiii) (Fellow ficbinders, if you find this post a useful ressource, don't hesitate to use it yourselves)

What's ficbinding?

Ficbinding (also called fanbinding) means a reader is going to print your fic and make a book out of it. It goes from the simple single booklet stapled together to leatherbound gold-foiled volumes.

Are you gonna make money off of my writing?!

I wouldn't dream of it. Ficbinding is just another fandom practice: you can't monetize your fic writing because you don't own the universe you're writing about, and I can't monetize your fic because it doesn't belong to me. I believe there are professionals who bind fics for a price (on Etsy, maybe?) but I'm ethically opposed to it.

Why do you do it, then?

Love of the craft. I'm a craftsman, I love choosing the best fabrics, fonts and embellishments for a project and making something with my hands.

Love of your fic. I liked it so much I want it in my house! I'm not fond of reading on a screen, it drastically reduces the chances I'll re-read the fic (even if I want to). Printing your fic ensures I'll enjoy it for years to come. It's the best compliment I can pay you.

As a gift to a friend who doesn't have the skills.

And what, it happens whether I want it or not?

As you can imagine, this is kind of a gray area legally. Nothing forces a ficbinder to reach out and tell you they're binding your fic. But this is fandom, and I personally view it as a community and consider that it's only courteous to let authors know I'm doing this. If I post pictures of my binding here, I want to be able to give credit where it's due, and since most authors are very happy to see their work bound, tagging them means they'll get a nice surprise when they open tumblr. I'll always do my best to find a way to contact you (ao3 comment, tumblr if you've put it on your ao3 profile).

I don't like strangers messaging me, is there a way to let people know I agree/don't allow this without talking to someone?

Valid, and there is! The simplest way is to write it in your ao3 bio, it's called a blanket permission or a transformative works statement. For example, mine says that I allow all transformative works (ficbinding is one, like fanart) based on my fics but that I like to be notified so I can gush about it and reblog/link to it, and I put my tumblr there to make it easy to contact me.

You can build a statement with this excellent tool. Answer the questions at the bottom of the page and you'll get a clearly-worded short statement to copy-paste into your bio (you can edit it, of course). The blanket permission is the thing ficbinders look for and as a digitally socially anxious person, let me tell you, it's a life-changer.

(Now, can I bind your fic, pretty please 🥺?)

#never hesitate to reach out in the askbox #bookbinding #fanbinding #ficbinding #fanfiction #ao3

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thewertsearch · 8 months

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Ask Comp 19/10

That's true - we don't know for sure that Trollian can fully emulate Sburb's surveillance capabilities.

If the trolls were sufficiently motivated, though, they wouldn't actually need to. Sollux could probably hack one of the kids' computers, to gain access to their Sburb viewport - although if he did, he wouldn't need a camera to snoop on their messages.

Is there a paranoia Aspect? I think I've finally found my calling.

anonymous asked: heya! ive just finished re-reading your ENtIRE liveblog and i to send asks about some stuff but i waited to finish so im sendind everything at once! (im gonna send stuff in a bunch of small asks so cat can stop just one instead of the whole thing in case of accidental spoilers) (aslo hi cat!) (also its ninnoy, havent sent an ask in a while but i changed my pfp to something slightly more spoilery so im in anon now) [...] the jade pen pal thing, do you have any new theories on who it could be?

None! I'm sure that it's someone derived from Grandpa Harley, but everything else is a mystery.

I have no particular theories about who he is, how he knows Jade, where he got his hands on so many endgame weapons, or why he's got such an antiquated accent if he's watching movies from the 80s. I assume time travel is involved, but that doesn't really narrow anything down in a comic like this. He (she? they?) is a complete enigma, and I'll just have to wait to learn more.

ALsO WHEREs YOUR sONAs? we havent seen them in so long im afraid sahlle might have actueally died of meteor strike (joking of course) also have you realized that "sally" and "cat" are both one letter of from a valid kid name? you could lend her one of your "L"s

I've actually been workshopping some Quest stuff for Sahlee this week! I suppose I'd need to figure out her Title first, though, and for that, I'd need to get a more solid idea of her personality, and how her experiences on Alternia have shaped her.

in one of your last posts you seemed to imply that the multiverse exists inside the timeline, but ive always read it as the opposite, the timeline inside the universe that would explain why the trolls can pick any time from the humans universe to talk to them but cant have private conversations with their own futute/past selves, its not an inherent part of trollian, they are just outside the human timeline (the memos are still trollian being time fucky) dont know if that makes any difference but its a thought also i realize the tag may be unecessary due to my quirk, but its too late to stop now

(NOTE: quirk omitted for readability, but the substitutions are [t -> 7, s -> 2] - sort of a variant of Sollux's quirk. I actually don't think we've seen any quirks which add a 7, so the voice here is distinct from any trolls we've seen so far. I like it!)

Originally, my assumption was that each timeline contained a duplicate of the entire multiverse. Doomed timelines don't seem to let you communicate with other universes/dimensions, though, so they don't need to contain other sectors of reality. I'm currently of the opinion that doomed timelines only contain an instance of the dimension they were doomed in. The only timeline which contains the entire multiverse is the Alpha.

This mechanic keeps doomed timelines simple, but in-universe, I don't know why it exists. Much like the Alpha itself, it's a mystery I can only speculate about.

has the shipping chart been updated since the last time we saw it? also you (at some point) said that equius<>feferi was a controversial ship so i had to go back to check the notes and i was the only person i found talkig about it so i guess im the whole controversy? if thats the case i would like to thank you for recognizing me as the equius<>feferi number 1 hater (all jokes of course)

I got a few skeptical asks about Equius<>Feferi, but you're the only one who discussed it on the post itself. I guess by some measures, you are the most dedicated hater, because your hate was posted publicly! 🤣

I could make one or two changes, but I don't want to post a new chart until the kids meet the trolls in person, hopefully at the end of the Act!

The Scratch, naturally - but I'm also looking forward to seeing exactly how WV was Exiled. He's currently on Skaia, and Jack has lost interest in him, so who's actually sending him through the portal?

Tavros is barely a presence on the Land he's ostensibly the hero of, and all of his actions are being dictated by a third party who can physically control his body. This third party does not acknowledge or respect Tavros's own desires, effectively forcing him to play the game in a way that she personally approves of.

She claims it will make him stronger.

@bladekindeyewear submitted: That was a long, thorough, and fantastic response! It's fascinating seeing your opinion on these things-- and I'm glad to see that considering the questions we've given you seems to have made you more paranoid. But I'm just not entirely sure you're paranoid ENOUGH. Not yet. Much like how you just found that "BREEZE" quote in your Breath research, back at around the time you've now reached in the comic, we had dozens of theory-miners combing back through everything that had been said and shown in Homestuck, over and over again, searching for anything we might have missed that might have been of some importance. [...] So, uh….. how do I put this… Would you prefer to strictly handle that sort of thing all by yourself, as you've said? Which I'd agree is still the best way that you should keep to, for the most part? Or would you mind if I gave you just a CRUMB of an example, only one? A tiny bit of text that we in the theory community only found at about the time you've reached in the comic, even though it was more than a thousand pages earlier?

Shit, this is such a dilemma. I'm honestly really torn.

See, I'd probably find old fandom theories absolutely fascinating to analyze. I'd love to know how closely my ideas align with those of the early Homestuck fandom, and whether I'm saying anything really out-of-pocket. My analysis of Sollux's ~ATH script was apparently an original theory, and it's honestly one my proudest moments.

But that's also sort of the problem, isn't it? If I dive too deeply into other people's fan theories, they'll start to affect my own - and if I'm introduced to a really compelling fan theory, it could end up replacing any homegrown theories that I could have developed in lieu of it. If someone had send me a well-reasoned ~ATH theory before I did my own analysis, I'd probably have been less motivated to make the analysis in the first place. After all, many of my questions would already have been answered by a clever theory I just read.

People are free to send me their own off-the-cuff opinions on what's happening in the comic, or their own takes on any meta I write. I get a lot of asks like that, and they're some of my favorites. There are also asks which spoil a little too much, but I'm still interested in their takes, so Cat's saving them for later. We don't really delete asks - we just delay the ones that aren't necessarily appropriate for a blind liveblog.

Obviously there's a fine line here, and whether a given ask is a theory or just an opinion is a little subjective - but in my opinion, the influence that asks and submissions have had on my analysis has been relatively minor. I don't think many of my theories have been spawned from an ask, or killed by one.

This is a little different, though, because it's part of a theory that was crowdsourced over several years. It doesn't sound like something that could be inferred by an individual, so I'm not sure if it's something an individual liveblogger should necessarily know about? If I start crowdsourcing my analysis, my theories will be less Wertsearch and more fandom consensus, and I don't think I'd enjoy that as much.

I really want to know, but I think I'll enjoy the liveblog more if I don't. When I finish the comic, I'll gleefully analyze any fan theory that anyone sends me - but for now, I'll just have to wonder, and come up with theories of my own!

Yeah, we've really been getting into it with Vriska lately. I've enjoyed trying to explain and predict her actions, and I'm glad people don't think I'm going overboard when trying to analyze her.

When a character does something interesting, I don't like to move on until I have a theory about why they did it. Sure, it may be refuted later, but it needs to be something that's consistent with what I currently know about their personality.

Vriska takes a particularly long time to puzzle out in this way. Her motivations are derived from a complex web (lol) of factors, including Scratch, Spidermom, her rivalry with Terezi, her horrendous relationship with Tavros, classism, teenage hormones, quadrant politics, highblood society and the Alternian culture of violence. They all inform her decisions, and any combination of them could have been the catalyst for the latest Vriska Incident.

I want characters to make sense to me, and Vriska is written to deliberately challenge my attempt to achieve this. Her meta is fun to write, so I'm glad it's also fun to read!

#full liveblog #asks #act 5.2

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prodbyblush · 1 year

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nijiro x kpop idol!reader when?🤭

ｎｏｗｌｏａｄｉｎｇ …

▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒ 100%

ᴄᴏᴍᴘʟᴇᴛᴇ!

・❥・requested

→ fem!reader

• your number one fanboy. • must absolutely see you live in whatever variety show program you are on. re runs or records are unacceptable. but they will be acceptable only when he's seen you live first. • secret dates in your company's practice room, celebrity owned cafes or restaurants, late night drives or even flying to another country to be able to date freely without the prying eyes and cameras. • he knows it's difficult for kpop idols to just release a dating news out of the blue. though may this be the case, his relationship with you isn't a secret to his father and his closest friends. • when he's busy filming and can't attend to your concert, he'll send all kinds of means to support you and your group - sending flowers, a coffee truck, re posting your groups' comeback poster on his ig story. • the type to bob his head a little and mouth the lyrics of the song you and your group are performing. then when the camera pans at him, he'd smile a little and wave his hand. • probably has the fan chant memorized and mumbling to it under his breath- • "you did so great on stage, lovely." • he isn't one to spend a lot on merchandise, but nijiro's definitely have your group's lightstick and albums! • sulks if he doesn't get you as his photocard. • your safety is his priority. he doesn't want overly obsessive older males or "fans" getting closer to you. • he would also know if you're uncomfortable with the dress given to you by your stylist. • "don't you think the skirt's too short? she's going to be performing later on. maybe, something a little longer?" • forgive him. he's quite overprotective. especially when he's learned about how some "fans" film their idols' upskirts. • possibly a select few will point out that you two are dating but then again, nijiro wouldn't leave any crumbs behind when he's out with you! • if you want to reveal the relationship to the public, it's okay with him. if you don't want to, it's okay with him too. he doesn't want to pressure you about it. you're no secret of his when the closest people know what you two have. • very nice to your managers and group members! he treats them like how he treats you. of course, he wants to get their approval too- • but if ever comes a time that Dispatch catches you two (most possibly catching you two inside a car that is parked at a dim location) then he'll be forced to reveal the relationship. • nijiro would get mad as to why would Dispatch go all the way to do such a thing. but then again, he won't be able to take back what he's given out. • but at least, you two aren't a secret to the world anymore.

TAGS: @retrospacealien @chishiya-of-diamonds @ang3liclov3ly @kenqki @shadowheads-shitshow @lunoxxy @supercoffeeblogs @laylasbunbunny

#nijiro murakami #murakami nijiro #nijiro murakami x y/n #nijiro murakami scenarios #nijiro murakami imagine #nijiro murakami x reader #nijiro murakami headcanons #murakami nijiro x reader #murakami nijiro headcanons

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gaypirate420 · 2 years

Text

Delicate touch // Bruce Wayne.

Bruce Wayne x male! reader.

(i had to re post this sorry, the tags aren't working and idk why).

Summary: Bruce stumbled into your apartment in the middle of the night.

3:30 AM.

He opened the window with delicacy, he miscalculated and tripped over the couch, he didn't move afraid of you waking up scared by the sudden noise.

He takes a deep breath and grabs his backpack from outside then closes the window again.

He gets rid of his dirty jacket and hat, he stares at your door and thinks if he should leave or treat his injuries here.

He walked slowly to the bathroom, after dropping a few things he arrives at the door, he enters and turns on the lights.

4:00 AM.

He is on your kitchen, inspecting the shelves for a glass.

The flash of the lights make him hiss and cover his eyes.

"Hello Mister Wayne." You said leaning on the door frame, Bruce grabs the glass and turns around to meet your gaze.

"Hello." He said softly still covering his eyes a little, you smirked and got closer to him, your hands immediately going to his shirt lifting it up to inspect his wounds.

"Batman needs a better suit." You teased, you meet eyes with him and you smiled, Bruce returned the smile softly.

You kiss him on the lips, his free hand goes to grab yours.

"Sorry for waking you." He said, you pushed his hair back reveling his face, you kiss him on the cheek.

"It's okay, lover boy." You pulled away from him to head over to your fridge, Bruce poured some water on his glass.

"Are you—okay?" You asked while you grabbed and apple.

"I suppose so, why?" He asked before taking what it feels like the best sip of water he had in years.

"Being Batman seems very mentally and physically exhausting." You commented and took a bite of the fruit, Bruce avoided your gaze and looked at the glass.

You closed the door of your fridge and rest on the wall, you sighed.

"You worry too much." He said low, his voice sounded like he was annoyed.

"I'm your boyfriend Bruce, of course I'll worry." You snapped, he looks at you.

"Right—sorry I'm— tonight was rough and I still haven't solve a case. I haven't slept well in the past two weeks." He confessed with a following sigh, he lefts the glass on the table and it's surprised by your arms on his shoulders.

He wraps his arms around your waist and buried his face on your neck, your stroke his hair.

His grip tighten.

4:30 AM

"I love you." He whispered.

"I love you too." You said softly, he looks at you.

"You need a shower, Batsy." You commented, Bruce smiled and nod slightly.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

5:45 AM.

"Hm, look at that the sun is about to raise." You said while you grabbed a blacked from your couch.

"Sorry— again." Bruce said while he put on one of your shirts.

He grabbed his towel to dry his hair, then he felt your chest on his back.

"It's okay— again." You said, you entered your room and Bruce followed you.

"I was very worried ya know." You whispered.

"I'm sorry, I've been busy" Bruce said.

"You haven't call me and I thought something really bad happened to you—" You said sad.

"I miss you, Bruce." You said, your fingers brushing his chest.

Your touch is relaxing, caring, loving and soft.

He neglects you and he is mad at himself for doing so but Bruce is trying to figure out how to manage his new lifestyle.

Your hand traveled down his torso, your fingers brushed his member.

"Wouldn't you like to release some stress?" You whispered against his ear, he swallowed.

"Yes, please." He begged.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

7:00 AM.

He lays on your bed, his breathing crashing against your neck, his eyelids heavy and he is fighting to kept them open.

Your hand goes to his hair, you stroke it slowly.

"...stop that" He mumbled, you smirked.

"Why?" You asked.

"I—I don't want to fall asleep" Bruce said lower.

"But you need to sleep, you need to rest, I do too." You said, he groaned.

"...nightmares" He said even lower, you looked at him and stroke his cheek, he closed his eyes.

"It's okay, Bruce. I'll be here with you, now rest Batboy." You whispered, he took a deep breath and got closer to your body.

"Fine—you win today—pretty boy." He said, you smiled at his attempt of a pet name, his hand travel to your lower back.

You knew that you wouldn't be able to move on the slightest.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A/N: soooo for some reason when I first uploaded this it wasn't showing on the tags to I rewrite it and re posted I hope it shows this time.

#bruce wayne #bruce wayne x reader #bruce wayne x male reader #x male reader #the batman x reader #the batman x male reader #battinson #batman x reader #batman x male reader

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chiefbeifongcanrailme · 3 days

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Thanks for tagging me, @wishingforatypewriter!

20 Questions for Fic Writers

Before I begin, there may be spoilers below!

1. How many works do you have on Ao3? 142! But a lot of them are one-shots.

2. What’s your total Ao3 word count? It's 355,968, surprisingly. I'm pretty sure I've seen individual fics longer than this. But also, I think that's a pretty big number for me considering..

3. What fandoms do you write for? Only and only, exclusively Avatar, The Legend of Korra.

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

Chaos: Chaos was my first ever multi-chapter fic. It stars Lin Beifong, no surprise there, thrust with this eclectic group consisting of her "found family". Primarily focused on Linumi (Lin x Bumi), the fic actually serves as a post canon fix it.

Soul: Soul quite literally is written from the soul. It mostly focuses on the relationship between Lin and Tenzin (ofc, it's LinxTenzin) and explores their connection beyond the physical realm. It's not just about two people who fell in and out of love over the course of time, but about two souls that ache and burn for the other.

The Pledge: This was supposed to be a Lin x Tenzin one-shot of Tenzin falling victim to some kind of out of body, false-memory-confabulation situation where he just quite literally forgets that he wasn't married to Lin. I really wanted to leave this fic as is, but a lot of people asked for a part 2 and the people pleaser in me didn't wanna disappoint. I didn't love how the fic turned out, but oh well. I love the first chapter though.

Abscond: Another multi-chapter! This one is Lin x Mako. It's a series of events that led to Lin and Mako finding commonality and having this flirtatious banter that neither could control. It's a little dramatic, but fun nonetheless.

Laws of Physics: This one's different. It's my Lin x Bumi modern AU, they're both college professors in their late 30s, early 40s respectively. Like chaos, it features almost every character (not all in great detail ofc), and it's been so fun to re-imagine everyone in this modern setting.

5. Do you respond to comments? Yes, always! I may be a little behind sometimes, but I always make it a point to respond. I love, love, love, love comments!

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? There might be a tie here: So Many Signs: It's a post-breakup Linzin fic where they see each other for the first time at a gala. A hundred percent based on Exxile by Taylor Swift. Chimera: I'm not sure it fully comes across, but Bumi has this recurring dream about drinking with Lin where they play games and kiss- turns out, this dream is what's flashing before his eyes as he's drowning in deep waters to his death. Yeah, whoa. Why did I write this?

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Okay, I think they're all happy!

Okay, but jokes aside, I think It's Time To Make Time kinda gives everyone a very happy ending. Oh, and Ghost of Weddings!

8. Do you get hate on fics? I have gotten hate maybe once or twice on AO3. It's not typical. But it's there- and it's funny. Everyone on Tumblr hates me though lmao.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? I have attempted smut a few times! I'll be honest, it isn't great. I've read some fantastic smut so I just know I don't fall in the "smut writer" category. I mostly write a lil bangity-bang-bang for Lin. That's about it.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written? Do crossovers between my real life and Lin Beifong fanfiction count? If not, then no I haven't written crossovers. But if yes, then it's Exhaustion. Way to expose myself lmao.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? No, but I wouldn't be opposed to it.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? No, but I would love to! There's some really wonderful authors out there and I would LOVE to write with them.

14. What’s your all-time favorite ship? It's a three way tie between Linzin-Linumi-Linzolt. I can't pick. I do love other ships from other fandoms, but let's stick to what we know lol.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? I'm going to be greeted with pitchforks for this one, but it may wind up being Waging Wars. I kinda forgot what my initial premise for the fic was (should've written it down, I know), so I'm gonna focus on stuff I have mapped out instead. I'm sorry. I will try my best coming back to it though, I promise.

16. What are your writing strengths? I think my ideas are pretty good. The way I can visualize or imagine up these situations often take me aback too.

17. What are your writing weaknesses? The writing part of it. The more I get out of practice, the more I struggle- which leads to taking insane amounts of time between chapters.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? I guess if it fits the characters/story/universe, it's fair game. I've never done it though.

19. First fandom you wrote for? Ha! Avatar The Legend of Korra.

20. Favourite fic you’ve written? Ummmm that's a hard question. Here, you tell me yours.

I'm tagging @orangepanic, @risingsoleil, @superliz6 and anyone who wants to participate!

#merkittty answers #ask games

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rorywritesjunk · 6 months

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For these foamy green hills are but saltwater desert

Richie, Mohji’s lion, isn’t doing so well. The crew end up at a small island with a dwindling population to seek help and Buggy meets Midori, the mayor who is far more stubborn and trusting with his crew than he can really comprehend.

Rating: PG-13, gonna have smut at some point later though. Warnings: Buggy being obnoxious, of course. I’d call this a fast paced slow burn. It takes the place over the course of the week and days are split into two chapters. There’s also some drama and other pirates. A/N: Full confession. I honestly wrote this because I have been watching the anime and Richie is one of the best characters. Do I know a lot about the anime? No. Is some of this chaotic and characters OOC? Of course! It’s a fanfic. Is it self indulgent? Hell yes. I had fun writing this and wanted to share it. Also, I wrote this more with anime!Buggy in mind since we don’t get to see Richie in the live action. Additional Note: I neglected this story! I didn't mean to as I got busy with the Kid Buggy fic and some one shots. This story is mostly finished, I just have to get it posted. I also have a meme I want to make for this as well which may come later.

Title comes from the song “Dryad’s Promise” by Tricky Pixie.

Chapter 5

Day 3 pt 1

Buggy had his arms crossed as he walked through the small town. There was a little store and bar, and those were the only two businesses operating. The rest of the buildings were boarded shut, some with signs saying they would re-open in some other town on another island. It was a bit depressing to see. This place wouldn't be worth destroying at all in the end.

He was on his own until lunch. Midori had business to attend to that involved being the mayor, and he didn't really want to tag along for those errands. It sounded boring, so he decided to explore some more.

Except he walked down the main street in about five minutes before arriving at another farm. How could anyone live in a place this small? You'd see the same thing daily, no doubt have the same conversations, and see the same people.

This place was kind of like living on a ship, but at least he got to see different places.

Buggy paused as he stopped at the bottom of the road leading up to the farm house. The grass was overgrown, there were no animals, and the windows were broken out. The island was dying. There would be no one left but Midori in the end and for some reason that was upsetting to him. How could she be stubborn and say she would be the last one? Why wouldn't she leave when the others left, or even leave before them? Why stick around with that blind stubbornness that she had?

Maybe…

He shook his head. He wasn't going to ask her to come with, even if it was to drop her off at the next island. If she wanted to stay then she could stay. No matter what he said to her she wouldn't budge. It was only the third day with her and he already felt himself age years just from arguing with her.

He sighed and started back up the road to the little downtown area, stopping when he saw Midori leave the little store. She looked upset and he frowned. That didn't seem right. Without warning he stormed up to her.

"What's wrong?!" He demanded, catching her off guard. She wiped her eyes.

"Uh, nothing." She told him as she forced a smile. "Nothing's wrong, Buggy."

He glared at her and crossed his arms. "Liar. What happened?"

"It was nothing, Buggy, really." She insisted as she tried to push past him, but he grabbed her arm and pulled her back to him. She sighed and looked up at him, her voice tired. "What?"

"Tell me what happened. I'll teach'em a lesson." He said, turning his attention to the little store. If they offended her or hurt her, he'd be happy to go in and have a polite conversation with them.

She put her hand on his chest, pushing him back gently. He looked back at her, the urge to fight whoever wronged her still there. Midori gave him a sad smile. "Come on, Captain, let's go for a walk."

He grumbled, kicked a rock at the door, and allowed her to lead him down the road he just came from. They walked past the abandoned farmhouse and down a bit further, leading to the shore. Damn, this island was so small.

"I was just informed by the older couple who run the store that they are leaving." She told him as she kicked her boots off and stuck her feet into the sand. "And with that happening… everyone else will follow because it was just a matter of time."

Buggy watched her carefully. She sank down to the ground and covered her face. He scratched his cheek and shrugged. "Well, maybe…"

"If you suggest I leave I'll punch you in the back of the knee, Buggy." She mumbled from behind her hands. "I… don't want to hear it. I just need to be sad for a bit."

"I was going to suggest something else!" He shot back, but he forced himself to breathe for a moment before continuing. "I was going to suggest reaching out to other islands, post about home availability, maybe people would move out here." He clenched his teeth. "Maybe the Marines would build a base here. That would help."

She sniffed and looked up at him as tears started to roll down her cheeks. "Maybe. Maybe that can happen."

"Don't cry over something you can't control." He sighed. "It's dumb." He backtracked when she made a face. "I'm not saying you're dumb! Just everything else! The only thing that's dumb is your big heart for this place!"

She giggled softly as the tears fell. "You're bad at this, Buggy. Haven't you ever comforted someone before?"

He grumbled and looked away from her, cheeks pink from the frustration over this interaction. "I'm not trying to comfort you."

Midori clenched her fist and reached up, gently bumping his knee with her fist. "Thanks, that was apparent."

"Yea, well… don't cry when we walk back home because people may think I made you cry." He grumbled. "I don't need them chasing us outta here yet."

"I won't let that happen." She promised.

When Buggy came into the kitchen for lunch, he stopped when he saw Midori sitting at the table, staring out the window that faced the water. His ship was out there, anchored and tied to the docks. In a few days he would be leaving with the crew and putting this place behind them, hopefully forgetting their time here. Buggy didn’t want to dwell on nostalgia.

Midori didn’t seem to realize he was there. She let out a few sniffles occasionally, wiping away the tears that rolled down her cheeks. Was she still crying over the news from this morning, or was it something different? He cleared his throat and she frantically wiped at her cheeks using her sleeve before turning to face him, her face lighting up. He tried not to look her in the eyes right then, not wanting to see the sadness that was still there.

“Hey!” She said as she pushed her chair away from the table. “Sorry, I didn’t get started on lunch yet. Got a little distracted.” She chuckled softly as she went to the counter, grabbing some different fruits to cut up. “How about a fruit plate with some cheese? Something simple.”

He sighed in frustration before stomping over to her, catching her surprise as he trapped her between his arms as he looked down at her, his hands resting on the counter. She was smiling but it wasn’t the one he was used to seeing, the one he had started to look forward to over the short time they’ve known each other. With a huff, he raised his hand up, thumb brushing away her tears.

“What’s got you crying now?” He asked quietly, tone far more gentle than she had been expecting. “If it’s that old couple, I’ll go have a word with them.”

Midori’s heart jumped into her throat at how close he was. She tried to shrink back against the counter, to put distance between them, but he was right there and so close to her that she almost thought it was fear she felt, just for a moment, but he did nothing to scare her. Her heart was pounding at his touch and her throat went dry. She opened her mouth to speak but couldn’t, instead snapping her mouth shut before looking down, not meeting his gaze.

Buggy didn’t like being ignored. Both hands cupped her cheeks, lifting her head back up to look at him as he glared down at her. “Tell me what’s wrong!”

Without hesitation, Midori placed both of her hands on his as fresh tears started rolling down her cheek, wailing, “Everyone wants to leave, Buggy!”

Oh, shit. He didn’t expect the waterworks. He dropped his hands and she let go of him, now wiping at her eyes as she cried. Panic started to hit him. He didn’t know what to do. She was actually crying in front of him and it wasn’t his fault.

She sank to the floor, sobbing, and he looked for a tea towel or something to dry her eyes. He didn’t want her to cry, he wanted to see her smile, but he didn’t know what to do or say to do that, to get her to stop crying. He finally found a tea towel and knelt down in front of her, holding it out. “Please don’t.”

Midori took it from him, sniffling loudly as she wiped her eyes. “W-What?”

“I… don’t want to see you crying.” He said as his face started to turn red. “I’d rather see you smile. Please?”

“B-Buggy, everyone’s going t-to leave.” She told him, hiccuping. “With the shopkeepers leaving, we drop down more… and… and an hour ago the rest of them came and spoke to me… they’re leaving when the others go.” Fresh tears came to her eyes. “They’re leaving next week. A ship will come and collect them, the ship that would bring us our goods and supplies. They’re going to go on that ship and I’ll be here, alone.” Midori gripped the tea towel and pressed it against her eyes as she cried. “I’m the last one here, Buggy!”

Oh, he didn’t want to see her cry. He didn’t want to hear the heartbreak in her voice, see her tears rolling down her cheeks. He didn’t know what to do or say to make her feel better. Maybe he just needed to let her cry it out, get it out of her system for a few minutes before moving on. Maybe this would be a wake up call for her, that staying behind after everyone else left would be foolish. Maybe, just maybe, he could suggest she come aboard his ship, join his crew, maybe help Mohji look after Richie since the lion has taken a liking to her. She could stay in Buggy’s room, his bed was big enough to share; she didn’t need to be around the rest of the crew all of the time.

He wanted to suggest that, and he started to open his mouth to do so, but she let out a heavy sigh, sniffled, and looked back up at him with watery eyes.

“Thank you for listening.” She told him. “I… I needed that, thank you.”

He snapped his mouth shut and nodded. Maybe he wouldn’t say anything to her at all then.

#buggy the clown #buggy the clown x reader #buggy x reader #buggy x you #buggy the clown x you #opla buggy the clown x reader #opla buggy x reader #opla buggy the clown #buggy opla #opla buggy x you #opla buggy the clown x you

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hidden-behind-the-fourth-wall · 10 months

Text

Love isn't something you just learn Commander. Part 2

Pairing: Commander Cody x F!Reader

Words: 14 536 (oopsie)

Warning: Angst, like A LOT OF ANGST, a description of violence, DEATH, a little bit of action, wouldn't call it a smut even. Fluff. Cody being an idiot. ANGST. Bur Fluff as well.

Summary: A lot has happened and Cody realised that maybe things change.

A/N: So it is not editted. I am sorry, maybe I will do it later. I just really wanted to post it :D And I'm not sure I am 100% with the ending. It feels rush. Maybe I will come back one day and re-write. But for now. ENJOY :)

P.S. My Tag List is open to yeah... :D

It was new and scary. The thought itself wasn't really welcoming. You were a stationed medic, not trained to be a field doctor. So when the request came in for you and your team to accompany the Troops on the next mission you weren't sure if that was just some silly mistake.

Of course you were promised to be secured as well as it was possible, but the thought itself wasn't really as welcoming as you'd like it to be. The War was scary and you weren't a soldier. Not one bit, and you never hid that.

"We need some medical support. What we have from the Clones army isn't enough", Obi Wan explained, hoping to find a common ground with you. "We work well with your team. You know Kix and our medic, so both the 212th and 501st would be able to cooperate well with you."

"We're not soldiers, Kenobi" you answered, looking at your closest medics. "Most of my team consists of civilians volunteering to help, with not even any medical background." You stopped and sighed deeply, feeling all the eyes on you. "Are we going to get any basic defense lessons?"

"The first mission starts in three days. We don't have time for that. Most of your people would stay behind as a background help. Only those with more medical experience would be put in front of the battles as a better equipped help." Saying that, his gaze was moved to his soldiers and nodded his head at them, making you frown. "I'm sorry Y/N", your brow raised hearing him say your first name. Manipulative son of a bitch. "I know, you didn't sign up for that, but…"

"I will talk to my people. It is their decision, alright?", he nodded understanding your point. "I will help as much as I can of course. I'm just…" you trailed off, feeling bashful all of a sudden. "I don't want to be a bother if it comes to it."

"You won't be, Doc, trust us." Cody spoke and you turned towards him. It has been almost a month since that fateful talk. You kept your promise to him to be adult about it and to your surprise Cody made sure you felt comfortable around him. What's more, he and you spent more time together than ever. At the beginning he would come for a check up, staying a bit later just to talk. Nothing special, nothing that would make any of you uncomfortable. But with time the two of you noticed that your conversations became more and more fun rather than essential. “We would still prefer to give at least a basic defense training for the medics that would accompany us into an actual field. You included.” You swallowed and nodded. No, you didn’t like that one bit. There was a solid reason why you decided to never become a soldier. You weren’t the physical type of person really. Always keeping your nose in books has made you averse to any physical activities. “Some of my people and a bunch of 501st guys will be happy to teach you guys some basics.” Despite Cody’s soft spoken words you were still not sure about it. But it was War and you promised yourself that you would help the Clones and the Jedi win it in any way possible.

“Let me talk to my team and I will let you know about the final size of the eventual group.” All of them nodded their heads. You could decide for your own, but your people’s lives weren’t yours and they had a right to decide. “I will accompany you, of course, but I will have to leave Garialth here to keep an eye on everything.” Kenobi wasn’t too happy about it, but he understood that someone must stay behind in case and if he was forced to choose, you were still the best possible option. “How much time does my team have to decide?”

“None, really” Rex interjected, sending you one of his apologetic looks. “Even if the smaller medic teams wouldn’t accompany us to the field, we still need to give them a basic military brief. And we leave tomorrow morning so…”

“Give me half an hour?” Rex smiled, thankful for your cooperation. “I need your word, Kenobi, that if any of my men decides to stay here, there will be no consequence.” The Jedi nodded and promised that nothing bad would happen. “And I want to have a way to contact all of the teams that will be made up from my medics.” Another nod and well, you had to give it to Kenobi. After all, he was a negotiator. “Half an hour.”

***

You were proud of your men. There were only a handful of them that didn’t want to join the Troopers. Most of them may have been civilians joining your team, but they have quickly become the true medic team of the War. Even Skywalker and Kenobi were surprised when you gave them the numbers. Yes, you were proud of your men, and even more afraid now. The more joined the field, the bigger probability that more would never come back.

“Come on, Doc.” Cody’s hand on your shoulder shifted your focus onto him. “I’m responsible for your training.”

“Excuse me?” You gaped at him, not believing what you were hearing. “For sure you have some better things to do than that!” He turned and looked at you with a raised brow. He sighed deeply and then you truly looked at him. He was tired, very tired. The rested man that left your hospital bed was long gone and the Cody you knew took his place. The blacks under his eyes were getting bigger, his face despite not showing any emotions gave away more to those that looked closely. You noticed the way he would look for a quiet place more than often, probably due to the headaches that were probably becoming an everyday occurrence in his life now. His sullen cheeks worried you a bit that you have already been taking care of. Whenever he would come to you for a caff or just a talk you always had something to eat. Whether it was something as stupid as a sandwich or even something sweet. But something more than ratio food.

“Keeping you and other medics safe is our priority now.” He smiled softly seeing the way you were looking at him. “Stop analyzing me.”

“I’m not” you pouted and chuckled when he raised his brow at you playfully. You rolled your eyes and sighed. “Fine, maybe I am. But can you blame me? You left my hospital looking shiny, like you came right from Kamino and not even a month later you are once again.. Well you…”

“Me?!” He laughed at that and you cursed the little butterflies in your stomach at that sound. It wasn’t often Cody would truly laugh, but when he did, it was the most beautiful sound and you swore you’d do anything just to hear him again. It was like an addiction, when you had it once, you wanted it always.

“You look tired Cody. I know you’re the Marshall Commander but when was the last time you actually rested? I can’t make you train me when I know you could spend that time resting.” He raised his brow at you and you stood your ground, knowing what he was doing. The bastard knew how imitating he was, but you were a head medic of the Coruscant Hospital. You weren’t one for intimidation. And so you crossed your hands and locked eyes with him, making him smirk.

“You are stubborn, has anyone ever told you that?”

“One or two of your brothers”, you shrugged and he rolled his eyes at that, making you smile.

“How about we go through the strategy for this mission, and while you revise it yourself I would close my eyes for a while?” You narrowed your eyes at him but obliged, happy with a somehow compromise. A simple “close my eyes” wasn’t what you initially was aiming for, but when it comes to Cody, you knew it was more than what you were able to get.

"Just a heads up, I'm a very slow reader!" The man chuckled and you were already forming a plan for him to rest as long as possible. Even if it meant reading the damn strategy briefing more times that it was logically necessary.

***

The sound of your angry groans was the only thing that could have been heard for a while now. No matter what you'd do, the damn thing wouldn't work as well as it did for Cody and the bastard seemed too smug about it.

"You won't become an A-class shooter after just an hour, Doc" the little smirk on his lip would normally bring a soft smile to your lips, but you were tired and annoyed. Nothing seemed to work. No matter how you stood, how high or low your arms were, or what direction your feet were facing, you were unable to shoot the damn target.

"Your breath is too hectic", he started, taking a stand next to you. His blaster at a perfect angle with his arm, the stance was just as he showed you, and his eyes never leaving the target. A perfect soldier shooting a perfect 10. "It's like you hate the solemn thought of holding a blaster." You looked at him and bit your lips nervously. He had a point, the first time he gave you the gun to hold, you could feel your hand shaking. You weren't a trained soldier. You were a medic, a doctor, and holding a gun was the last thing you wanted.

"I'm a medic, a doctor," you started, avoiding his eyes. It felt stupid. Here you were in front of a Marshal Commander, a man you lo… you look up to, looking all so weak and pathetic. "I swore to protect people not kill them." Cody frowned and sighed, ignoring the way you flinched at it a little bit.

He never thought of that. He knew training you wouldn't be easy, after all you weren't a trained soldier, bread for it. But he never truly comprehends that your complete lack of skill with a blaster would have another reason, other than just you being unable to do it. He would never have guessed that someone would just be opposed to even holding it and with an actually good reason.

"A gun isn't just for killing," he started, not sure how to go with it. He wasn't good with talks like that, Rex or even Fives would probably have a better go, but you were here with him and his job was to keep you safe. He wanted to keep you safe. And to do it, he needed you to learn the basics of self defense. "It can save people as well. This is how we do it, why we Clones use it." You raised your brow at him but looked at him giving that benefit of a doubt. "Killing is hard and the last result when it comes to humans. This is why the blaster has two options. To stunt and to kill. We may be machines made to win a war but we do not like killing any more than you or other civilians."

"You're not machines!" He smiled at your interruption. He would never admit, but his heart did skip a bit whenever you showed your protective side towards him and his brothers. He would never admit to it, but he liked the way your eyes shine with anger whenever someone spoke wrongly of Clones, he couldn't help but smile at the way your tone gets more serious and your feet stumble with a bit of anger, almost as if to emphasize your words. It's kind of childish, but he still adores it. He doesn't know when that happened, but whenever you speak and defeat them, his heart does this weird thing he never truly understood and he thinks he never will.

"Is that all you got from my speech?" His question, despite being serious, weighs some kind of cheekiness that only Cody would show. "Think of a gun like one of your scalpels and equipment you use to save our lives." He gave you the weapon back and you looked down at it, weighing it in your hand.

It was so warm. From that short time he held it it already became his. She felt different, like his touch on it took away the scary aspect of it. After all, if Cody could hold it and use it, it can't be that bad. Right ?

"How do you feel with a knife?" The question got you off guard. You raised your brow at him and smiled mischievously.

"I did cut you open nicely", your heart skipped a bit with his laugh and you were never more proud of yourself. Cody had one of the most beautiful laughs. Despite him being a clone, you were sure that you would be able to distinguish him from the others with that laugh alone. It was deep and soft at the same time, with that something in it, something mysterious.

"Maybe the gun isn't really your thing after all."

***

"So no knife either?" You felt like crying. Nothing worked. The knife was even worse than the blaster. With the latter, you were at least able to shoot remotely close to the target, with a knife… well it took Cody one simple move to take it away from you. You felt angry and embarrassed and you don't know when you started to cry. "Hey, Doc, are you alright?" The concern in his voice brought a quiet sob from you, which he didn't miss. His hand on your shoulder would have probably brought you comfort if you weren't so mad at yourself right now. "Did you hurt yourself?"

"I'm angry", you hissed, throwing away the knife and trying to get rid of the angry tears pouring down your cheeks. "I'm so damn furious at myself." He raised his brows and whether he knew or not, his hand tightened on your shoulder. "We're off on the first mission tomorrow and all I did for the past two days was waste your time. I'm so angry because I'm sure you had better things to do than babysit me around and teach me things I'm so terrible at. You tried so hard and here I am…" you looked up in alarm when you heard a chuckle coming from the man. You expect all the different reactions but not this.

"I'm sorry Doc, I really am… it's just" he composed himself and straightened sending you one of his soft smiles. "I thought you hurt yourself or I worked you off too much and here you are… gosh you really are adorable!" The both of you froze at his words.

From the way his eyes searched anything but you, it was obvious he did not plan on saying it. At least not saying it out loud. You looked away and bit your lip nervously. You must have misheard him, it was impossible that the Marshal Commander Cody saw you as adorable. But it was not the time for that. And so you did all you could to master the most neutral face, like you didn't hear it at all.

"You're tensed", he finally continued when he noticed that words he stumbled didn't have any effect on you. He wasn't sure if he was thankful for that or the complete opposite. "It's like you are already preparing yourself for failure." You rolled your eyes, trying to control your breathing once again. "Here." There was a millisecond of uncertainty, but he picked up your knife and walked behind you, handing you the weapon. "Take it and slowly take a deep breath. Try to feel it in your hand, but empty your mind. Do not associate it with anything rather than just a knife. A blade you used hundreds of times in your entire life." His gloved hand was on yours, the second one protectively on your other arm. "You're holding it so hard, I'm afraid you'll break it", you couldn't help but chuckle, despite the uncontrollable feeling in your stomach, when he moved closer and you could feel him almost leaning on you. "Take a deep breath, Doc. Breath with me. Come on", he turned you around and put your hand on his chest. Despite the inner happiness in seeing him in only his blacks, you really wished he had his chest plate now on. You could feel his muscles from the thin fabric and you did your best to focus on what he wanted you to do.

And so you closed your eyes and listened to the controlled beating of his heart. How his chest would move wu\ith such peace that you envied him for it. "Breath with me. In and out and repeat."

He smiled softly, feeling how you started to drum your fingers on his chest, almost looking for a rhythm that would relax you somehow. He would never guess that you were so stressed. He knew that feeling well. Having the lives of others on your back was enough to make your nights sleepless. Also the longer the War was taking, the more tired you would become, the more of his brothers would make your life more and more tiring. He knew and saw numerous times how you cared deeply for him and other Clones and he knew that whenever any of them didn't come back it hurt you more and more. And yet you never let it affect you. You always smiled and supported them. You were always there when he or the others needed you. You would send him to get some sleep, not caring about the oh so growing bags under your own eyes. You were way beyond tired, you were exhausted and yet here you were on a way to a mission you really could have said no to. However, you never even thought for a minute about yourself, your main priority was your man. You didn't think twice before saying yes, but your men’s lives weren’t yours to decide. You were not a soldier and yet you were stronger than anyone Cody knew. And he admired it, he watched you since his hospital visit and he couldn't take his eyes off.

In the beginning he would come and talk to you, because he felt bad for the way he reacted to your feelings. But the more he observed, the more time he spent with you, he learned to realize that he actually enjoyed that time. You were such a fun and interesting person, with a lot to talk about. And what he found himself to be waiting for yet another evening he would spend just with you. Talking about the War, politics and the situation of the medic teams. But also about your favorite planet, the language you both would like to learn, about the dish you'd like to try and things you'd never touch and how awful Kenobi's lack of any reason is. He found himself thinking what would you think of the last planet he was on. Would you enjoy it or would you hate it as much as he did. What he learned was that he didn't find it scary that he started to think of you more and more often. And that scared him the most.

"Now open your eyes and just do what I taught you." And to your surprise the knife actually hit the target. Maybe not the actual target per se, but it stuck into the oval plate, which was a much better outcome than the other tries before. You gasped surprised and looked up at Commander smiling widely. You were so excited about the outcome of your last throw that you didn't realize how close you were to the man. His hands were still on you, his body closer than before. "Good girl." He murmured and it was then you realized. The praise never left him before and it was so unexpected that you had to stiffen the little moan trying to escape. Was he doing it on purpose, did he know what he did to you? Could you even dream to think that maybe you had a small effect on him as well? "Now let's see if that would work on the blaster as well." He took a step back and removed his hands from yours, putting the practice blaster in the same place the knife was just seconds ago. "Just like you did before take a deep breath."

You tried your best to concentrate and remember the feeling just before you threw the knife. But your mind was blank,completely. Your body felt cold and stiff again and you missed it. Miserably. You looked away afraid to see disappointment in his eyes.

"Again", you flinched a little bit, unsure if it was the Commander voice he used on you now, or you were just being paranoid. "Relax, Doc. You're stiff and awkward again. Take a deep breath, just like I showed you."

You weren't sure what it was that made you say it. Was it the overwhelming feeling or failure that you wanted to end. Or just a reminder of his hands on yours, the dream you know that would never come true. The reminder of him behind you, so close that could feel his heartbeat. The same heart you saved weeks ago. The heart of the man you were so desperately feeling in love with and you couldn't help it.

"Would you remind me, please?" Cody's eyes widened, hearing your quiet and soft question. You still weren’t looking at him, but he was sure to see your cheeks getting this adorable color of pink. It's not that Cody isn't familiar with women, hell no. He had enough adventures with them when he went to the 79's. But these were emotionless, he always knew what to expect. A night of fun and release and a goodbye before the sunrise. A one night stand. Nothing more, nothing less. But despite it all, he knew when a woman flirted with him. And despite the women in the club being more forward, he was sure that little question was not innocent. Not when you yourself were so flustered.

He felt divided when he stood behind you. He knew that he shouldn't, he didn't want to give you hope that anything could happen between the two of you. He knew he was becoming soft on you, but you weren't like those girls in the club. He didn't want to use those feelings of yours as a way to release his stress. You were so much to him already. So much more than he would dream to accept.

But the other part of him was pulling him towards you. It wanted to be closer to you, to be touched by you and show the most vulnerable parts of himself, he never showed anyone, not even his closest brothers. He wanted to get to know you more and more. And not only on the physical level but the emotional as well, and as scary as it was it was most importantly thrilling. And the more time he spent with you the more time he realized the second voice always won.

And so he grasped your arm in one of his hands, turned you around and pulled you towards him in a way that your back was pressed against his chest. The hand on your arm traveled down to your hand holding the blaster, changing its position to make sure you held it correctly. His other hand was hovered over your hip. "Relax, mesh’la" you shivered slightly hearing his voice so close to your ear. You swallowed hard and did what he asked, ignoring the Mando word you were sure you've heard before in your life. "There, good girl!" Now you were almost sure he was doing it on purpose. There was no way that he was as cruelest as that. You felt so warm and no matter how much you tried, you felt heat on your cheeks and your mouth was getting drier and drier. "Good, deep breath. Close your eyes for a second and relax." You followed his instructions and smiled, actually relaxing with his touch. He smelled amazing as well, like pinetree forest. So fresh and natural and so when you opened your eyes and shot, you actually hit the little disk not too far away from the target.

He turned you around and smiled softly at you. The kind of smile you have never seen. You could see it in his eyes how proud he was of you right now. His other hand joined the first one in your hip and he pulled you closer, closing the distance between the two of you even more. His eyes shifted to your lip and you swallowed, unable to look away from this beautiful, amazing man. As you were about to pull him down by his neck, the loud beeping pulled you two away from each other.

"General", his tone lacked the softness and he was back to being the Commander of 212th. "Yes, we are done here." You felt a weird twist in the stomach when he didn't look at you. "She'll manage when it's necessary", you looked away from him and put the gun away, the feeling getting nastier every second. "Yes, sir. I'm coming" He ended the call and without giving you even a look, walked to his armor and put it on quickly, including the helmet. "Practice what you learned alone. I will send Boil to supervise your progress" and he left, leaving you completely dumbstruck. Without even a glance back, the doors closed behind you and you felt tears in your eyes.

What the hell just happened? There were so many questions in your head now and you weren't sure, you were able to find an answer to any of them. Were you too forward with the request ? If you were, why didn't he say anything? It was him, who pulled you closer, it was him that gave you that look. It was his hand on your hips and it was his smile that lured you towards him. And despite knowing it all, you still felt as if you screwed up. You were standing there searching for a reason why he just left, moving you to someone else, as you were an incompetent shiny.

You cursed when tears started to fall. Why did he just leave? Did he hate you now ? Did you read the room wrong ? The more you thought about it, the more you felt your heart breaking. You thought, damn that, you hoped, that maybe you two were getting closer. You never expected him to return your feelings. You just wanted to be his friend. You just wanted him in your life. And somehow, not even sure how, you screwed it all up.

It was stupid of you to think that someone like Cody would ever be interested in you. You were just one of the medics, working for GAR. There was nothing special about you. You weren't even able to use a blaster. How would you even think, the Marshal Commander would spare you any time. You should have been happy that he spent his precious time with you. Something you were sure that you have lost.

And so, you followed his order. An order of the Marshal Commander of the Republic army. You calmed yourself down and practiced, to make sure that you wouldn't bother anyone.

***

"You look angry" Rex was looking at his vod with concern in his eyes. "You seemed optimistic with the plan on the debrief."

"It's a good plan." Cody answered shortly, taking a sip of caff, or whatever the hell that was supposed to be.

"Then what's going on?" The Commander sighed and hid his face in his hands, unable to even explain it. He was angry at himself. So damn frustrated, that he let himself go when it came to you. He acted like a damn shiny. It was stupid, but he knew what he wanted at that moment. He wanted you, so damn much. He wanted to taste you in all the ways possible. He wanted to feel those soft hands on his skin, he wanted to hear you say his name. He wanted you. And that was the stupidest thing he did, even worse than getting drunk with Wolffe that one night, and that was stupid already.

"Nothing. I just have to get my head straightened to focus on the mission", the captain raised his brow in surprise. Cody was always focused on the mission. Rex hasn't met anyone as serious about the War as Cody was. So whatever got him distracted must be huge. "I have to focus on what's really important."

"You spend too much time with General Kenobi… you start talking in the same mysterious ways" the Commander chuckled softly and took another sip from his cup, hating it even more than the first one. What he wouldn't do for a cup of an actual caff. He would have to definitely go see Fox after that mission. The bastard was one lucky son of a bitch. Sure he had to work below Palpatine, but he had the best caff.

"Have you ever thought about something more?" The question surprised both of them. Cody wasn't sure if it was the tiredness and lack of sleep that pushed him to start the topic, or just the fact that he felt worse and worse everytime he remembered the look on your face when he just left.

"More than what? That piss they dare call caff?

"You know what I mean Rex’ika" the captain of course knew what his brother meant. But he was still working out the surprise of the question itself. Cody was a dedicated soldier, one of, if not the best one out there. And here he was, asking about the alternative future. Something more than being a soldier. "What if there is more and we're just too afraid to take it?"

"We're soldiers, Clones… we are at War. I won't lie to you and say that I never thought of what it would be like to have a family one day. To wake up to a nice warm body wrapped around me and not wonder about the awkwardness of the morning after." He chuckled nervously. "But I'm aware that those are dreams of common men, and we, my friend, are not common men." He hated to see the way Cody shoulders dropped a bit at his words. But he preferred to be honest with him straight away than to give him a false hope that would break him even more, later on. "So I'm guessing the training was eventful?"

It was Cody's time to chuckle nervously, sadly even, which didn't go unnoticed by Rex. It wasn't a surprise to Rex about your feeling towards his Vod, and he may have heard of the rejection you got from the said man. So it was surprising to see when Cody has started to spend his time with you, more often than not. And he was more than surprised when it was the Commander that volunteered to train you for the upcoming mission. Rex worried it would only make things more complicated, but he never thought it would turn out like that. With Cody falling for the sweet Doctor. If they weren't Clones, during the War, he would have found the situation hilarious. If only.

"Boil is going to train her that last day" Rex' eyes widened at Cody's words and tone. "I need to focus on the strategy and the briefing. I don't have time to babysit. "Not waiting for a response, the Commander stood and left the kitchen, hoping to get at least a bit of sleep.

Rex was staring at the closed doors unable to comprehend what just happened. But whatever did happen between the two of you must have scared the man quite a bit, seeing how he decided that running away from his problems and putting down the emotional barrier was the only way to go. Rex only hoped that it would not affect you that much.

***

Boil was an excellent teacher. He was patient and fun to be around. He gave you some tips for when you have to shoot and you don't have time to think. Or he gave you an idea to hold the knife differently. Of course he didn't make a soldier out of you in a day, but you were more than thankful to him for the support. You still felt nervous now, sitting at the briefing room, but you kind of felt like you would be able to do something. He also made sure you trained hard enough not to think of Cody.

Cody, the same man, who was standing near the table covered in plans, who was ignoring your presence. It was like you didn't exist. Like that little scene between the two of you never happened. Like all that relationship you worked so hard in maintaining just seemed to cease. It broke your heart, seeing how he bluntly ignored you, not even daring looking your way.

"You with us, Doc?" You blinked a couple of times, turning your attention towards Kenobi, who was relying on the brief for the mission.

"My people are ready, whenever you need us." You started, walking closer to the map, stopping as far away from Cody as possible. "My technical team will be stationed here", you pointed at one of the caves about half a click from the main medical base and about a click from the main battle front. “Kix' team will support my guys there and have some moving men between those two places." You circled around the spots you talked about. "This will give us a good flow of pace. Team Alpha and Beta will be placed under both you General and Skywalker as medical support for the Clones teams." You paused and looked at the two Jedi with nothing but seriousness in your eyes. "Please remember I put these men's lives into your hands, Masters. I trust I won't have to focus on writing any apology letters to their families." This was one of the points you brought up regarding the mission. Your men would be as safe as it was possible. "Ceavis and I will lead two small teams closest to the Generals and focus on first aid and logistics. Each team will consist of 4 men plus the leaders. What we say, goes. Understood?" You were sure you noticed a smirk on both Rex' and Ashoka's lips. But no one dared to say anything but to nod.

This mission was one of the most important ones yet. Two objectives during one assault. One team would focus on the fighting and defending objective. Keeping the army as far away from the separatists' base as possible. And that mission fell on the more offensive 501st. The other one would be responsible for saving the political prisoners and getting the stolen information back to the Republic - fallen under the responsibility of the 212th. This was why the medic team was needed. There was no time to retreat and help the injured back in the base. The base would have to move with them and help those that would still be working, hoping to minimize the casualties.

"Doc, you keep with me and Cody." You tensed a bit, unable to hide it away from the Jedi, who only raised his brow. "We will listen to you regarding the medical knowledge and expertise, but Cody here is responsible for you, so you listen to him. Understood ?" He mimicked your words with a lace of joke in his voice. You nodded looking at the Commander, who was still looking at the map, memorizing it to the last detail.

You couldn't blame him, you knew that. He was focused on the mission and the War and keeping his brothers alive. But it still hurt you that he bluntly ignored you, like you were some kind of disease. It hurts you to be able to see the softness in his eyes and feel it on your skin and so absurdly be punished for it. You never expected anything from him, and you told him that, and for just one moment you felt so happy and full. So full and finally able to breathe when he looked at you with those eyes of his. Like you were the only thing in the world at that short moment, like you were a magnet pulling him towards you. And then it was over, it ended sooner than it actually started and he wasn't even able to look at you.

"Don't worry, Kenobi. I know my place." You didn't mean it to sound as hurt as you did, but it did make Cody finally look at you. He frowned, but didn't say anything. Putting his helmet on, he left the room, telling his General he's off to double check everything.

"So…" you looked at Rex who walked to your side. You were thankful it was him and not Kenobi, or worse, Anakin. "Will you at least tell what my di’kut of a brother did?" You couldn't help but smile softly at the Captain. You weren't sure if Cody spoke to him about what happened… on the other hand you would like to know yourself what happened.

"Getting rid of any interruptions." The Clone raised his brow at that and sighed. He was afraid, whatever Cody started talking about, was more what he originally thought. And seeing the way you both reacted to each other, Rex knew that whatever you worked so hard to build, was somehow destroyed. And he couldn't get the feeling off his chest, that it was somehow his brother's fault. "It's my fault really. I was stupid enough to hope that whatever was building between us was something more than a typical professional relation." And before Rex was able to say anything, you left the briefing room, hoping he would have missed that single tear that dropped down your cheek.

***

"I hope you know I don't like it one bit" Ceavis growled under his breath, preparing for the upcoming mission. Ceavis was your third in command and as much as you appreciated his work and knowledge, you and him were never truly friends. You both had too different characters and a completely different look on the world and your jobs.

"Yes, you mentioned that once or twice", you rolled your eyes at his tone and sighed. You were in no mood to listen to his constant negativity. It was the last thing you and your men needed. You knew it wasn't a good idea, but the decision has been made. "I'm not sure which team would actually be a better and safer option." You stared at him for a while, waiting for him to at least start packing the essentials, but apparently he had all the time in the world, while you were repacking for the fifth time already.

You didn't know how Kix did it. You were only allowed a small backpack, enough to keep you alive, but not enough to actually do anything productive. It scared you, the thought that you had to choose from the essentials, that the Clones had to choose like that every damn mission.

"Master Skywalker and the 501st's team will be much bigger, that's why I'm sending you there." You started, trying to control the annoyance in your voice. "You and Enya will focus on firming two formations. Let Enya handle the stay put one, while you take the teams and get the help directly to the soldiers. Your team got the basic training right ?" He nodded visibly, not happy with the way you still wanted to go with the mission. You wonder why he even agreed to come. "Anakin knows that the lives of my people are his priority. He wouldn't want to get under my skin, so whenever you feel like the mission is out of the hands of the 501st speak with Rex and Anakin." You got a nod from him and you turned to leave the room. "We are part of something bigger here, Ceavis, try to remember that", and not giving him any time to respond you left, going to meet up with your team.

***

"Is there any reason for this weird energy between you and Doc?" Cody frowned at his General. He should have known Kenobi would have picked up any unusual behavior. "I thought you were becoming close."

"Too close", the Commander answered, before he was able to think of the words coming out of his mouth. He sighed at the Jedi's raised brow and continued. "We're at War, General. It would be irresponsible to get attached to anyone."

"You don't mind the relationship you share with me and your brothers."

"This is different, sir!" Cody murmured, knowing well enough what the man next to him was trying to do.

"Well I hope so, I'm really not good at dealing with romantic feelings" Cody's head snapped at him, his eyes widened and mouth opened almost as if he was ready to fight with his General, but nothing came out. "Whether you're blind or really afraid. Frankly I never considered you a coward and for the success of the mission I hope there's nothing wrong with your eyesight." The Clone swallowed hard and the Jedi smiled. "What's really the matter, my dear ?" Cody hated it when he used these words of affection. He would never be able to say no to his Jedi, and he hated the fact that the general had such power over him. With nothing more than some words.

"I don't really know myself. Before I knew it, I started to actually enjoy her company. She's smart, witty, interesting and…" He coughed awkwardly, playing with his helmet. "She's really pretty." He looked away, hearing the Jedi chuckle softly. "I felt bad at the beginning. I never had anyone declare their love for me and I didn't want her to get hurt. I hoped that if I tried to stay friendly she wouldn't feel bad. But the more time I spent with her the more I thought of her." He shook his head in annoyance and kept on playing with the helmet. "The last couple of days, when I trained her… I know not every Jedi believes we’re nothing but the weapon for the Republic, but it's still weird to hear it from civvies." He scratched his neck nervously, feeling his Jedi's eyes on him. "She sees us. Like really sees us and I can't help but wanting to see her as well. She cried angry tears because she thought she was a burden to me." He chuckled, but got serious again with the flashbacks. "I never felt such a pull towards anybody. I wanted to comfort her not as a Commander, but as a man. Her man." He clenched his hands around his helmet and closed his eyes. "I… you called when I almost …egh.. you know."

"Kissed her", Kenobi helped him out, laughing at the way his Commander stared at him. It was like he said something in a line of taboo. Obi Wan could not help but admit that it was adorable to see the always stoic Commander, all flustered with a thought of kissing someone.

"I'm starting to realize why the Jedi opt for no emotions involved." Cody started again, making the Jedi frown again. "I asked Boil to train her after that and we haven't really spoken… I'm trying to ignore her, because if I'm near her, all I think about is her going on that mission with us. And the thought that something may happen to her paralyzes me to the ground. It's pathetic isn't it?"

Kenobi smiled softly at the man and patted him on the shoulder. It wasn't a secret to him that you were utterly in love with the man, but it was new to see the Clone smitten with you, especially after he rejected your feelings in the first place. He knew the way others looked at the Clones, and he would lie if he said he wasn’t angry whenever someone said something bad about them. For the General, his Commander and his brothers were as much human as he or anyone in the Galaxy and they deserved the respect for protecting the Republic. So whenever he went out with his battalion to 79th, he truly enjoyed seeing them relaxed and flirty with the girls. And it wasn't a secret that he saw Cody as more than his Commander. He was happy to call him a friend and right now, he couldn't help the happy feeling in his stomach seeing Cody in love with his other friend.

"It's not pathetic, Cody. It's childish that you ignore her, yes." He grinned at the angry look from the Clone but continued nevertheless. "But definitely not pathetic. We Jedi see more and feel stronger. So much stronger than anyone in the Galaxy. To control those feelings we opt for these no attachment rules. But it's not like we don't feel. Feeling makes you human. It makes you act faster and stronger to protect those that you care about. You are a great soldier, my dear, and there is not doubt in me that the mission will be a success, even when you worry so deeply for our Doctor." The Clone smiled softly and nodded. "Love isn't easy and it doesn't always end well, but running away from it may be the most stupid mistake you'd made in your life. If you care for her, talk to her. Tell her how you feel, but for the love of the Force, don't ignore her. You'll only hurt yourself and her even more." He ended at the same moment when your team was slowly getting hungry. "Trust me, my friend. Life is to short for regrets."

***

"I want to set a camp of some kind in here" you stated, showing a place that was supposed to be abandoned, not too far away from the final destination, but far enough that the medics would have time to fall back. "If you need a medic to come with you, I volunteer, Boil and Commander Cody have trained me enough not to be a bother. Aila will stay and take command over the camp." The young girl nodded, already hearing the plan from you, before you presented it to the battalion. "Cath has also agreed to go if you decide to split during the mission. This would give a total of four medic in the move-in team, which is more than enough." You looked at Cath, a young man who, as one of few, had some experience with blasters.

"Sounds good to me" Kenobi started, looking at his Commander who was still looking at the holomap, a frown on his face. He didn't like the fact that you so willingly wanted to go with them, but he knew if it was anyone else he would have agreed to a good plan. You were the best medic he knew and it would be a stupid ass decision if he declined your help, especially that it was what he trained you for.

"It sounds good. Having a small camp will help in case we would need to fall out and go in a smaller group." He nodded, more and more impressed with your planning skills. It made him a bit at ease, when he knew you were prepared for that mission. "The entry to the building seems like a labyrinth, it would be a good idea to divide the teams right now, to save time later."

"I'll take the lead with the first team, you can have the other team." Kenobi started looking at Cody, who nodded in agreement. "I want to see what Cath is capable of." He didn't miss his Commander's eyes on him and he knew there would be a stern talking about it later on. He bit down a chuckle at that. "You and Doc work well together, are you OK with that ?"

"Yes, sir!"

"Sure, Kenobi", both of you answered at the same time, not daring to look at each other. Working well with each other. You almost scoffed how untrue that was at the moment. You probably would if Cody would have enough guts to look at you… and well, if you weren't such a coward yourself. But this was a mission, no personal attachment was prohibited and you had to hide the hurt you felt. And shame. It was the second time you let the same man break your heart. He didn't even have to do much, his ignorance was enough for you to bring tears in your eyes at night. But it was in the past, nothing was more important than the present. And right now you had to work together to make sure the mission went smoothly.

"Alright! We move out in ten, get ready!" Everyone around turned and was ready to follow the Jedi into the ship, already prepared for the upcoming mission. You did the same, turning to leave when you felt a hand on your wrist stopping you.

"Can we please talk?" You raised your brow wanting nothing more to just walk away and tell him there was nothing to talk about. But your stupid heart made you stop and nod at the Clone. "I must apologize. What I did in the training room was a mistake." So two was not enough. He just broke your heart the third time. A mistake - that closeness, that softness in his eyes, the touch of his hands on you. It was all a mistake. "I should not have gotten so close. I… I mean there is a mission and I think we should both focus on that right now." He tried to make the last two words stand out, but the nervousness made it only sound harsher than he ever intended.

"I understand", his eyes widened at your affirmation and he seemed to relax a bit, until he actually looked at you and his heart broke just a little. Your expression was emotionless, your eyes had no life in them, like you didn't care about anything. "You don't have to worry, that mistake won't happen again." He voluntarily flinched at your monotone voice and the repeat of his own words. Somehow, hearing them from you, felt foreign, painful. "The mission is a priority, Commander." And then you left him alone in that empty briefing room. Feeling worse than he has ever felt before.

***

The planet was a nightmare. Whenever you stood, you could hear someone fighting. It was like a war zone on the whole damn planet. You tried to ignore the dead bodies of locals, just left there. Forgotten by everyone, like a bag of trash forgotten, when it wasn't needed anymore.

"We divide here." Kenobi started, looking at your team, as if encouraging you. You sent him a small smile, which je reciprocated with a firm nod. "Cody, I will let you know when we get the data back, I'm awaiting your response when it comes to the situation at your sector."

"Yes, sir !" The Clone turned towards your group and showed the small map from the holopad. "We will focus on that road here. It's a recon mission from us. If we can avoid the fight we will. 501 has that covered." You couldn't help but smile at his tired tone, when he mentioned Anakin's division. "We may encounter local forces there. If you have to fight, if you don't, capture them. Reckon! Everyone gets it?” A chorus of yes sirs was heard and the men scattered to get into the position. “Stay close to me, Doc.” You turned, after hearing his voice. Despite the command in the tone, you could see a vulnerability in his eyes. You didn't understand where that came from, but you nodded.

You weren’t about to be a bother to him. You have decided. The moment that mission is over, you will come back to your hospital and regain that professional relationship Cody was so fixated about. The last thing you wanted was to make his life any more difficult than it already was. You desperately hoped to become his friend. Someone who would be able to help him whenever he would have been in need. But he wasn’t looking for a friend. You realized he was just being nice. A good, old Cody. Always the gentleman. All this talk the two of you had was some kind of an apology from him for turning you down. And that thought was making you want to break down and cry right here right now.

“Boss” you heard Aila’s voice in your right ear and turned to commlink on. “The camp is set up and we have divided work throughout our stuff and the Clones.” You smiled at her words and nodded at Cody who looked your way, as if to confirm that all is fine.

“Good! Make sure that you’re aware of both your surroundings and the medical stuff. Try to divide it into small teams as we discussed. Get Grail and Tylie focus on the equipment. The rest make sure you show off to those Clones. We can’t be worse than them.” You ignored the chuckle from the Commander and smiled at the one from the girl on the base. You believed in your men, your medics were the best and you weren’t being subjective. You trained them well, and you trusted them with your life. All you could do was boost their morale as much as possible. Even with some stupid jokes like that. “If anything happens let me or Commander Cody know.”

“Boil and Waxer have already instructed us on the military shit.” The girl laughed at the two Clones that were left behind as a support. “You be safe, OK, boss? I need a raise and I won’t get it, if you don’t come back.” You laughed at that and turned off the comm, when you walked into the tunnel.

“Focus now. Blasters out, get them into stun mode and keep your heads up.” Cody muttered, turning on the light on his helmet. “And remember we only kill the damn clanckers.” You followed his order, getting your blaster out. You could almost hear your heart beating, with how loud it was getting. You tried your best to control your breathing but it was getting more difficult the further you went into that tunnel. The damn gun was also much heavier than it was during the practice. You noticed how your hand shook a bit when you lifted the blaster slightly. This was ridiculous. You shouldn’t be this nervous, you knew what you were getting yourself into. It’s too late to change your mind. Survive this and you can come back to your patients and white walls of your hospital.

“I won’t let anything happen to you.” Cody whispered softly, seeing the way your hands were shaking. He wasn’t surprised to see your nervous state. Despite being an amazing doctor, you were just a civilian, that was always as far away as possible from the battlefield. All this must be terrifying for you. Not only were you afraid for your own life, but knowing you, you were also thinking of your team. Always the caring one. “Do you trust me?” He didn’t know where that question came from. He wasn’t supposed to focus on any kind of conversation with you. His job was to observe and act as quickly as possible. Not have an existential dialogue, with the woman he was annoyingly falling for. This should be left for after the mission. And yet here he was, trying his best to make you feel better.

“Yes”, the certainty in your voice made his heart skip a beat. He didn’t expect you to answer so quickly and with such confidence. He looked down and smiled softly seeing the way you were completely focused on your surroundings. ‘Good girl’, he thought to himself.

“Good, then we have nothing to worry about”, she smiled softly and he felt lighter seeing that little lip quirk. He felt proud for making you feel at least a little bit at ease.

“Commander!” He stopped, motioning to others to stand by. “Its Vice here. We are at some kind of door, about half a click from your position. We can check it out, or should we wait for you?”

“Wait for us.” He commended, signaling others to move again. “All the medics are here with us, in case something happens no one will be able to help you. Stand down, and wait, Tropper.” A soft yes, sir was the last thing Cody heard and he took some extra, longer steps to get where his men are. He could hear how you already contacted the CLone medic for this team, to be ready. Well, there go the nerves.

“Isn’t it too quiet, Commander?” If they were in any other situation, he would have hated the way you addressed him. But it was the mission, and he was telling himself you were just being professional. Something he should focus on as well. “I may be paranoid, but…”

“It’s possible that the real action will start after we open those doors Vice told us about”, he answered but couldn’t get rid of the nasty feeling in his stomach. He actually did feel the same as you. You all walked for 15 minutes now and nothing was going on. Not only you haven't missed anything, but there was no one waiting for you. “General”, he finally spoke to his comm, when they stopped at the doors with Vice by his side. “Do you read me?”

“Loud and clear, Cody.” hearing as Kenobi answered almost automatically it seemed that nothing was happening on his side. “Something doesn’t smell nice in here.”

“Same here, Sir.” He murmured and signaled for his men to take position. “ We are at the doors. We will open them and see where it gets us. Has General Skywalker been in touch”

“The 501st are having the time of their lives right now, from what I heard.” You couldn’t help but chuckle softly at his sarcastic tone. “But Anakin didn’t sound like he was complaining.”

“Nothing new then”, Cody commanded and the General hummed softly. I will contact you in 15 minutes. If you don’t hear from me or anyone on the team, please assume the worst.”

“Same here, Commander. Stay safe!” And that was it. No commands from the General to the Commander. There was no need. Obi Wan trusted Cody completely and the Clone Commander knew that well. That trust went both ways.

“Ok, on count to three, Howl, open up that damn door.” raising his hand, he started to count down from three and when he closed the fist, you expected some kind of commotion, a boom or a blaster fire from the other side. But once again nothing was there. One part of you was happy that nothing has happened yet, but the second part knew that there was something fishy in here. “Move, move. Keep your eyes open, but let's keep on moving. Instinctively you moved closer to Cody, after his instructions, your fingers tightening on the blaster just a little more.

“The sensor shows around 50 people a click away from here”, Guts reported, showing the screen to Cody. So the intel was correct. There were people being held captive. “There are kids as well.” He nodded and looked down at you. You nodded, understanding. The moment they got there, it was your job to get to those poor people and help those that were in need. Your other, free fist clenched around your bag, ready for the action.

“General. We have sensed 50 lives a click away from us. We are ready to move in. We will meet you at the rendez-vous point, when we can.” He frowned when there was no response. He tried again, and again, but the line was quiet. “Howl, Vice, Doc, try your comms and contact the General.” You all did as he asked, but the outcome was the same. Silence.

“Shouldn’t we help them?” You asked and he looked at you, shaking his head.

“They may have encountered the enemy. We should finish our mission here and then help them.” You wanted to argue. What if they were ambushed, what if they needed our help but couldn’t contact us, what if… “You said you trust me, Doc.” You looked at him and frowned, when he took off his helmet. “Then trust me on this one. And let’s finish our first mission together.” You opened your mouth to respond, but couldn’t find any words. You did trust him. And his judgment. And so you nodded, closing your eyes to relax.

“Ok boys, let’s get this done and go help the General.” They all cheered and you all got ready to storm the place down, unable to hear the quiet rumble from the General in your ear. A silent “it’s a trap” that would later on be a constant nightmare to those that somehow survived.

***

All you could hear was the ringing in your ears. You tried opening your eyes, but you felt as if they were all too heavy. The air felt polluted and heavy all of a sudden. Your head, and that damn ringing wasn’t helping the migrene that was forming, quicker than you liked to admit. Something wasn’t right. But you were still too out of it to realize what was happening.

“Doc!!” you must be dreaming, because you are sure, you hear that soft voice of the commander near you. But for some reason he sounded so worried, almost scared. If that was even possible. You so desperately wanted to keep on dreaming. To have him speak to you in that same soft manner. With his hand on your cheek. This dream was what you wanted for so long and so you closed your eyes and focused on sleeping. “No, no, open those eyes. Come on, sweet girl! Look at me!” He never called you that. Those sweet words were like honey to your ears and you wanted to listen. But you were afraid that if you did, you would wake up and be met with reality. “You have to wake up, damn! Come on!” The pain in your stomach, however, brought you back to reality. With a gasp you sat down and opened those heavy lids, squinting, when the dust was getting into them. “Thank the Maker!”

You looked around and stiffened seeing the scene. If it was only biologically possible, you were sure, your heart just stopped beating right at that moment. You were used to blood and suffering and screams of pains, but what you were now surrounded by was more like Hell. It was how you imagined it to be.

“Don’t look!” it made you look up at him for the first time, since you opened your eyes. He didn’t have his helmet, there was a trickle of blood flowing down his handsome face. There were cuts on his cheeks and his always well-kept hair was a total mess now. He looked awful, and yet you still find him so incredibly handsome. “Focus those pretty eyes on me, OK?” You frowned and tried to look around again, but he stopped your head with his hand on your cheek. His forehead resting on yours, making your breath hitch at the proximity. “I need to get you out of here.”

“Cody”, you started but hissed when you tried to move. You looked down at the source of pain and your eyes widened. Your shirt was no longer white and one of Cody’s hands was pushing on the spot there, trying to stop the flow as much as he could. “What happened?” You asked quietly but he only shook his head and you released that he was shaking slightly. “Cody… Are you… Are you OK?” You were slurring a bit, but you had to make sure. He had a cut on his head. You needed to check on it, to make sure he didn’t have a concussion.

“I need to stop that fucking bleeding and I will be just fine, Mesh’la!” He said, pushing on that wound of yours, making you scream in pain. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry! Please, please tell me what to do!”

“I need to help others first. Need to take a look at your head!” You looked around again and a shocked sob escaped your lips, when you finally realized what surrounded you. Masses of motionless bodies, laying in the most bizarre positions. Some crushed by the rocks, some not even full. You weren’t sure if you were even able to locate the part of each of the bodies, to try to put them back together? What for? You didn’t know. Not like those Clones had families that would like to bury them. They all died here with their family. All of them, from what you saw. All these men that accompanied you here, were lying dead in front of you. And not just them. In the further part of the corridor you could see bodies of the civilians you came to save. Men, women, kids. Even babies. All dead, buried under the rocks, with blood pouring through the leaks of those rocky walls.

You tried to look away but you couldn’t. Even Cody’s hand on your face didn’t work this time. Your eyes were following each of the bodies surrounding you. A young man holding a woman in his arms. A child separated from his mother. A young woman with dreams cut so drastically. And your whole squad. Those men you loved so much and cared for. You tried to scream when you noticed Vice’s body laying not too far away from you. But you couldn’t as no sound left your lips. He just laid there, still in his armor. If you truly wanted, you could imagine, he was just resting. If you only shook him a bit, maybe he would wake up and smile at you.

You looked at Cody again, when you heard him calling you by your first name. You couldn’t remember if he ever did that? He did use your last name once or twice, but normally stuck with Doc. Until now, you weren’t sure he even knew your name. You chuckled to yourself, but caught when the pain was back, You gasped and almost fell back, if not for Cody keeping an eye on you.

“I know you worry about everyone. But please, Doc. We have to take care of you first.” Oh, yeah you were bleeding. The adrenaline was wearing off and you did start to feel it all. You tried to take a deep breath and relax a bit. You knew that if you let yourself, you will get into a panic attack mode, and that was not good for your heart. And then Cody would have to take care of even more than he does now. Poor guy. He did not sign up for this. You weren’t supposed to be a bother. No to him. No… You shook your head slightly, trying to get back to the topic at hand.

“As the bleeding isn’t exceeding, it means you did a good job and left whatever is there blocking it?” Speaking was getting more and more difficult, but you needed to instruct your commander what to do. You wouldn’t do it to him. You won’t just die, and leave him be. Alone in that Hell you found yourself in. “Don’t take it out even if I go into shock and ask you to do it, got it?” He nodded and still kept the pressure on the wound. “As I’m still able to actually think it means, I wasn’t out for too long and haven’t lost that much blood yet.”

“No… It all happened about 5 minutes ago.” You nodded and slowly sat up, easing your breathing with every second. It all meant one thing. You were probably in the second class of hemorrhagic shock, which wasn’t that bad. You did feel anxious, but the total confusion hasn’t come yet. “I’m not sure if we're actually safe here, so I would prefer to move you…”

“No”, you stopped him, mid sentence, shaking your head. “Any sudden move will lead me to bleed out. We need to stop that blood coming out of my body before anything else.”

“And how do we do that?” You clenched your hand around something, which you later on realized it was Cody’s thigh, you were holding on. But he didn’t seem to mind at all, not even caring that you would probably leave some bruises there.

“My bag”, you said softly, realizing that what you’re about to offer will be a hell on its own. But either that or bleeding out on your first ever mission. And that was just sad. “You will have to…” A cough stopped you and you cursed feeling a metallic taste in your mouth. Not good, very not good. “You will have to act fast. OK?” He nodded and he opened your back. To your surprise nothing broke there and you happily found what you were looking for. A pair of gloves, a bottle with a silver nitrate solution, you were so glad you decided to prepare. Some swabs, bacta patches and hemostatic dressings that should help the bacta to do the trick.

“Ok, some pay back for sticking my hands into your chest.” He raised his brow and smiled softly, happy to see you still had enough energy for some silly jokes. “First of all, put the gloves on. Then prepare some swabs and then after removing that thing in my body, you will pour the…”

“You just told me not to remove it”, he countered and you sigh, giving him a stern look. You didn’t have the energy to do any of it. You were slowly getting into class three of shock that wasn’t good.

“You will pull that out of me and pour that bottle’s continent on the wound. Do not stop even If I cry and scream. You need to pour at least half of it. You need to do that the second the thing is out of my body.” You looked at him and he nodded, understanding your implication. “You then put the dressing on and patch it up with some bacta. And hopefully it will stick till we get some help.”

“Hopefully?” he raised his brow at you but put on his gloves and started to follow your orders. He has never done anything like that. He wasn’t a medic. He wasn’t trained to do it. Your life depended on him and he hated it. He was supposed to protect you and here you were, lying injured because you saved him. He wasn’t sure you even remember how you pushed him away, when the bomb went off. How without thinking you just jumped to action saving his sorry ass.

He closed his eyes to relax and acted before he changed his mind. He tried. He tried so hard to ignore that hellish scream from you when he poured whatever there was in that bottle. He knew he would dream of nightmares of that scream and part of him knew he deserved it. But he kept on going. He did what you told him to do and when you laid there with your eyes half closed, breathing hard, your face covered in tears, but with the wound sealed somehow and no blood was flowing, he was fine with being the one to bring that scream out of you, if it meant you would survive it.

“Hey, Mesh’la, you OK?” You smiled weakly and nodded. “Ok, I’ll clean that up quickly and we need to go, ok?”

“I need to have a look at your injuries… We need to see if someone…”

“No-one survived.” It was like a slap to your face and you recoiled, feeling your eyes water at that. “It wa s a fucking trap. They knew we were coming and they used civilians to get us here.” He shoved the medical things into your bag, and took it on his shoulder. “I tried contacting the General, but no sign yet.” You looked around again, and sniffed looking at all those bodies laying around.

“I’m a doctor, Cody… I was supposed to save them. I was supposed to do something… I can’t just leave….”

“You couldn’t do anything for them… But you saved my life, if that makes you feel better.” You frowned, and gasped softly, when he lifted you up into his arms. He was so careful with you. It was such a contrast to the hardened soldier he was. “You pushed me away when the bob went off. I will always be in favor of you.” You looked up at his stoic face and hid your face into his chest, letting yourself cry. For real this time.

***

“Have any of them answered?” Obi Wan raised his eyes on his former Padawan and sighed, shaking his head. “Rex has his team ready to go. We will take Kix and Cath with us and we can go search for them.” Anakin looked at his Captain who nodded, ready to go and save his brother. “You can take Rex and go save your men.” The Master smirked and looked at Skywalker, who shrugged. He was a good man. Kenobi knew that Anakin understood. If it was Rex buried there, the young Skywalker would not have been as calm as his Master.

“I should have felt it in the Force much quicker. I should have acted sooner.”

“It’s not your fault, Master!” Ashoka added, frowning at Kenobi. “I don’t think anyone out there would blame you for that, and so you shouldn’t.”

“When did your Padawan become so smart, Anakin?” They both laughed softly and he sighed. “I hope she’s alright. It was her first mission.”

“Cody is there, so there is nothing to worry about, Sir!” Rex said, making the Jedi master smile softly. Yet, the Captain was right. Cody was the best soldier Kenobi knows. If there was anyone who would survive that and protect you, it was him. And so he stood and took his lightsaber from Anakin, ready to save his friends.

***

“I’m sorry Cody”, he looked down and your form crawled at his thighs. You looked so small, so adorable, if only those tears didn’t stain that pretty face of yours, he would be a happy man to hold you so close to himself. Almost losing you made him realize that he was an utter idiot. He should have been honest with you at the base. You two should have talked. And he promised himself, he would not leave your side. He would be your shield. Physically and emotionally. He would let you sleep on him, he would let you wet his armor with your tears. He would let you do anything to him, only if you felt just slightly better. “You lost so many of your brothers and I’m the one who’s…

“You cry for my brothers.” He ended for you, kissing your temple softly, making you freeze. You closed your eyes, enjoying the tender feeling of having him so close. You should not be enjoying it. It was selfish, and yet you couldn't help it. Despite the armor, you could feel the heat of his body. Or was it your body heat you felt? “Not many do that. Not many care enough to share a tear for them. And here you are. Your beautiful eyes puffy after crying so hard for those that were meant to die.”

“I hate when you say that.” He chuckled sadly, and hugged you closer, his cheek on the top of your head. “I wish I would have done more.” And yet it was like a lighting shock. You straightened, hissing in pain. Cody frowned and looked at you in alarm. “Let me see if you’re injured!” He exhaled and couldn’t help but smile.

“You should rest. I don’t know how long that patch will last…” You bit your lip and your hand slowly raised to go through his hair.

“Please, Cody. Let me be useful.” His eyes widened and he once again leaned his forehead to yours. A soft touch, an intimate gesture of the culture he was raised in. A quiet plea and the feelings exchange, of all the things he’s like to say but couldn’t. And so he nodded. And let you. He let you step away from him, keeping a safe hand close to you, just in case. He just sat there and let your small, soft hands take his armor off. Slowly, almost afraid as if your moves would bring any harm to him. If only you knew how different it was. How he yearned to feel you touch. To be cared for by you, with that loving touch of yours. “Can I?” He nodded his head, afraid to say anything. Not sure if he would be able to. “Oh, Cody!” You gasped, seeing his bruising ribs. It was impossible for him not to feel pain. “Why didn’t you say anything?”

“You were more important.” He murmured, not able to look at you. Such a strong Marshal Commander, unable to look at the woman he… yes, he loved, look in the eyes. What shocked him was how easy it came to him. Losing was like a spur for him to realize his feelings. “If I didn’t take care of me, who would save me like you could?” You blushed and smiled shyly at yourself, opening your bag. You carefully cleaned his bruises and the cuts on his cheek and head, making sure to bring him as little pain as possible. “I was scared I’d lost you out there.” You froze and his words, but stayed quiet, letting him say whatever was weightining on his chest. “I never wanted to hurt you. Never meant to be such a jerk. I…” He finally looked up and your heart broke a bit at his sad expression. It was like a mere memory of his actions that hurt him physically. “I was scared, because you were becoming someone so very important to me in such a short time and… I’m a Marshal Commander.” You apologized quietly when he hissed at one of the head injuries, when you put a patch of bacta there. “I’m… I’m supposed to only have War on my mind and yet here I am… I was so scared, when you laid there, unable to move.” You swallowed hard when he softly circled his fingers around your wrist. He brought your hand towards his lips and left a soft kiss there. A lingering touch, you will dream about when that mission is over. “I got scared when I realized that I cared so deeply for you. Back in the base. When I almost kissed you. You told me that love is when you can’t get someone out of your mind. And I keep on thinking of you all the damn time.” Your breath hitched at his admission.

Your shaky hand lowered to take care of his bruised ribs. And you tried to ignore how he shivered at your touch. And you hoped deep inside, that you had the same effect on him as he did on you. You should be a professional, but here he was, half naked in front of you. You tried to focus on your job, but his words shook you. He just admitted that he was falling for you. You swallowed hard, wanting to say something, do something, but you couldn’t. And so, you just wrapped his torso and ribs safely and looked up at him when you finally finished. Happy to know that there was nothing critical.

“Please don’t say all these things, if you’re going to ignore me, the moment we are back.” He flinched at your declaration, and you felt bad, but you needed to know. Needed to be perfectly sure, that if you let yourself dream, hope, then that won’t just crush after all this is over. “I have loved you for so long, so if you…” But you weren’t given a chance to finish. His lips were on you, before you were able to react. You froze, not sure if you were actually dreaming. His lips were softer than you imagined. It was kind of innocent and sweet, as if he was unsure of himself. When you didn’t move, he stepped back and awkwardly started to apologize, but you didn’t give him a chance. You crushed your lips to his, ignoring how your stomach hurt a bit with those sudden movements. But you didn’t care. You were finally kissing the man you have loved for such a long time.

Cody didn’t waste his time. Calloused, soft hands cupped your face, pulling you forward even more. He tilted his head, deepening the kiss, licking the bottom of your lip asking for permission to enter. And you let him, because who were you to make him wait. And he doesn’t waste that chance. It wasn’t just a kiss. It was a way, a chance to show you how much he adores you. His tongue is gently messaging yours, sensually, taking the time to get to know you.

He pulls away, but doesn’t waste any time, kissing your jaw softly, nipping at it softly, making you gasp softly at his touch. His hands grasp and your waist. Tightly, but enough to hurt you, mindful of your injury. He was so careful with you, so loving. You tilt your head back, wanting more. More of him, more of his warm and hot kisses. You feel him inhaling you and you can’t help but moan softly when he tastes you with his skillful tongue.

“Cody!” You shriek and he laughs, when you playfully pat him on the shoulder when he bit and sucked your pulse spot at your neck, for sure leaving a mark there. “What if someone notices?”

“Let them. They will know who you belong to!” Normally you would never let any man talk to you that way. But with Cody it didn’t feel disrespectful. It was like he was confessing, that at the same time he belonged to you and you almost cried with happiness. “But I have to stop now, cyare.” Your heart skipped a beat with the Mando leaving his mouth. “You are injured and I’m unsure if I would be able to stop myself if we go any further.” He softly kissed your forehead and you blushed at this innuendo. As you were about to say something even remotely flirtatious, a voice could be heard from Cody’s comlink. He quickly turned it on and you felt tears appearing in your eyes when you heard Kenobi’s voice on the other side.

“Cody, report.”

“General!” You could hear the Jedi relaxed sigh on the other side. “You have no idea how good it is to hear you.”

“Are you OK? Is anyone injured?” Your smile dropped and you clenched at your shirt nervously.

“Doc will need medical attention as we had to make do with her injuries.” He held your hand and sighed, readening himself to tell his Jedi the bad news. “It was a trap, Sir. The moment we walked in, the bomb activated. All of my team, including the civilians are gone.” There was silence on the other side. Probably no one expected the news to be so devastating.

“My sincere apologies, my dear. I did realize it was a trap, but…”

“Don’t blame yourself, Obi!” You interjected, hugging into Cody’s (still) bare chest. He raised his brow and you were expecting a similar reaction from the Master on the line as well. It was the first time you said his name like that. “No one could have expected that. We can’t save everyone.” You sniffed softly and Cody, wrapped his arm around you.

“It’s good to hear you”, you smiled when he used your name, instead of the nickname. “You both stay where you are. Rex has traced you, we should be there with two medics to take care of you.” And the line was off and you leaned into Cody, kissing his collarbone softly.

“When we’re back”, he started before Kenobi and the team would come. “I will properly apologize to you.” You frowned, and wanted to deny whatever he thought, but he only kissed you softly at the top of your head and shut you up completely with that sweet move. It was a truly weird feeling. You were so very happy, despite being so devastated at the same time.

***

It took you a whole month of rehabilitation and Kix’ nagging of you staying in bed, before he was remotely OK to let you leave the hospital. Cody was visiting you every day with some sort of a gift. A single flower, a chocolate, a cup of coffee, or a book, you could read to kill the boredom. You both talked, he apologized almost everyday and made sure that he bid you with the sweetest of kisses. You did have a serious talk about where you both saw this going. He promised you that he would do his best to open up to you, but he did ask to give him some time. He never even considered something as stable as a relationship and it was all new to him. And you were more than willing to give him all the time he needed. And so you both decided to take things slow. For the both of you.

So when he didn’t pick you up from the hospital today, you were worried. He was on his leave and he promised he would a week ago. But here you were, walking to your apartment alone. There was this sick feeling in your stomach, which you tried to get rid of. There was probably something holding him up. Something important.

You opened your flat doors and gasped, letting the bag fall from your shoulders to the floor. There he was awkwardly standing, in the middle of the room, with some flowers, a table ready for dinner.

“General Skywalker and Ashoka helped me with it… “ He walked towards you, handing you the flowers. “I’m sorry I didn’t pick you up from the hospital. But I do owe you a first date, don’t I, Cyare?” He leaned forward and pressed a sweet, quick peck on your lips.

“Oh, you are more than forgiven, Commander”.

Tag List: @loving-the-cambridges

#star wars #the clone wars #commander cody #star wars fanfiction #fanfiction #commander cody x reader #cody x you #idiots in love #idiots in denial #the clones #star wars the clone wars

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stoopid-turtle · 10 months

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I've seen people theorize as part of the devil's timeline (which I don't really subscribe to, but am curious about) that ggdd were pretending not to know each other beforehand when they started filming CQL and that that would explain why they got more familiar over time but also so quickly in the BTS. To me this would explain a couple things (like sharing phones so soon) but creates so many more questions that I have a hard time buying it. Mainly: I 100% understand why they wouldn't want to tell fans/the world at large any more details about their personal lives/relationship, since it's not our business, but I can't figure out why they'd like... act in front of the whole rest of the cast as strangers. I don't *think* it would make it seem like one gave the other any advantage in the casting process, but what do I know? And I can't think of a lot of other reasons for acting that elaborate/long-term. I was wondering if you had any takes on this?

Also! I wanted to say thanks again for your posts so far and I respect that it's not something you plan to keep doing, but I was (hoping) wondering if you were thinking about sticking around in the fandom as more of a spectator? I'm also a new turtle as of like 5 months ago so it's nice not to be the only one still going 🤯 over some of the BTS in 2023 when it's ancient news to everyone else. Thanks again for your hard work on your posts and timeline!

Hi!

Do they share phones really early? The earliest I saw was 7.7, though I'm not especially eagle-eyed. Beyond that instance and dd using gg's phone while the cast ate lunch on 8.2, I didn't notice either of them sharing phones in the videos I saw.

I guess I'm the odd one out bc I don't think they became familiar unusually fast. It seems like a reasonable timeline for the age they're at, from my experience. So I don't see the need to have an explanation for that since I don't see anything out of the norm in how their relationship progresses.

That's probably why I take the Devil's Timeline as interesting speculation but not much more.

But your main point is definitely a sticking point for me too.

Spitballing it, maybe they wanted to hide the nature of their relationship at first until they realized it was a gay-friendly set. But even then, why act like they don't know each other at all? They have a reasonable explanation for how they'd be acquainted: they met on DDU a year before. I'm not sure why they'd play coy.

Of course, behind the scenes industry stuff is always a wild card. We don't know what we don't know, and maybe gg and dd had a good reason to pretend they didn't know each other at all. I'm not well-versed enough in c-ent to even have a guess as to what that might be, but I assume it's possible.

At the same time, they later seem open about their relationship on set, even having couple fights and flirting while surrounded by cast and crew. So why hide things at the beginning?

I've been watching through some more of the daily bts on another playlist, and gg and dd act how I'd expect 2 reserved people to act on the first few days of working together. Of course, that's real subjective to assess, so somebody else could come away with a completely different impression of how they're acting. But, personally, I don't see anything that needs any explanation.

re: your second para: I'll probably go back to lurking. I have a primary tumblr acct that I use to lurk on a bunch of fandoms. I already followed the bjyx tags and a lot of the turtles on that acct before setting this up. I definitely plan to keep up with the boys, but I don't foresee posting that much in the future.

(I reserve the right to give in to my impulses and hunker down for the long-haul, though.)

I always get to a fandom late! I missed all the excitement when the bts first came out, but I still feel hype when I come across new-to-me stuff. I'm happy to enthuse with others!

#bjyx #yizhan #asks

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burntwaffle12 · 2 years

Text

BEE AND SNAKE MIRACULOUS EMBROIDERY

Wake up babe, new patches are done!

For all Lukloe/lukzoe shippers, this is for you (my mom chose them btw)

I will be honest, THESE TOOK SO LONG, just for the fact that I got lazy, but I finished them!

The bee was the fastest patch I've done so far, finished it in two days! and then the snake came and oh boy, did I take my sweet time.

I think the design was just so tedious I was dreading making it, and I think it kinda shows where I lost some of my patience but I am really happy with the result! the eyes were by far the most difficult part, I re did them multiple times and had to do a lot of work to get them to look the way I wanted to, even though it's like really small and most people wouldn't pay attention to them (but my inner Marinette would not let me rest)

I will say, the bee patch really stands out because of the colors but I can't imagine making it without the black. Also the border is thicker than the rest (by accident) but I honestly love it, it gives it a fuzzy bee look so I think it's really fitting.

ALSO, this means the BIG FIVE ARE DONE!

Of course I am still missing the center piece (technically that is also done, you can check the first post, but I will re do it). I am really happy with how everything looks so far! and can't wait for the ladybug and black cat piece!

I also re-ironed everything properly (before I didn't put the iron directly on them because I was scared I was going to stain them like what happened with the first piece) but I made sure the iron was clean and I think it gives a way better finish.

LOOK AT MY BABIES!!

This project has been stressing, annoying, fun, relaxing and intense and I honestly LOVE IT! But what I love the most is YOUR input. Last post I got a lot of tags and likes and seeing how my work has been so loved by you has made it all worth it!

Thanks to everyone who made such nice comments in my last post (you know who you are ;)) and thanks to my friends who supported me and have seen my work build up from nothing (you also know who you are <3)

AS ALWAYS, any comments, ideas, feedback, ANYTHING is welcome!!

Thanks for being part of this <3

First // previous // next

#miraculous ladybug #adrien agreste #marinette dupain cheng #mlb #miraculous fanart #embroidery #miraculous jacket #miraculous patches #snake miraculous #bee miraculous #luka couffaine #chloe bourgeois #zoe lee #miraculous awakening #ladybug #chat noir

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barid-bel-medar · 2 years

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Aizawa is the worse teacher since 1-A can’t trust him due to his “logical rises,” he can “expel” you based on his personal standards over UA’s, basically expects his students to solve/fix their own problems or use other students to do it meanwhile can secretly train a student outside his class to replace one of his own current students. (Shinso was completely being trained to replace someone in 1-A you can’t convince me otherwise.)

You know what, putting this under a cut since this is Aizawa critical and I doubt if you're a fan of his you're terribly interested in reading that. Also really hoping this doesn't pop up in his tag since I really don't enjoy posting criticism of a character in their own tag...

It always kinda bugs me about how the kids probably don't trust really trust him as an educator and this is never touched on. I think the thing is that the kids trust him the sense they trust him to keep them alive, but it's kinda illogical that they'd trust him to either be a competent or trustworthy teacher; see the fact he's the one who repeatedly has the most failures between the First Year heroics course isn't really a good sign. Like during first trimester finals only Monoma fails for 1-B, and they all pass the Licensing Exam. We got multiple 1-A students failing finals and during the licensing exam two 1-A students failed, which is not a great look. Hell, Aizawa even acknowledges that between him and Kan, Kan is the better teacher.

I'd actually argue his plan wasn't to expel someone from 1-A and replace them with Shinso. The thing is, during the Joint Simulation arc part of the point of it is to see which of the classes he'd better fit in. Otherwise he wouldn't be on teams with students with both classes. I also suspect UA does in a sense have a certain amount of 'extra' spots in case a Gen Ed student shows enough promise during the Sports Festival or additional mentor-ship with one of the teachers (since I sincerely doubt Aizawa is the first to ever do it). You aren't really guaranteed one of the heroics kids will fuck up to the point they deserve to be replaced, while at the same time a Gen Ed or other track student who's interested in transfer, show they are deserving of a spot.

I also feel it needs to be pointed out if USJ had never happened, he'd probably never have had any interest in training Shinso. Like, we can assume it's very unlikely first of all he's ever actually taught one of the homerooms he's previously been given, and more likely has done a blend of administrative assistant and sub work. In Japan it's incredibly uncommon for homeroom teachers to not be students' homeroom teachers for all three years. Also when we do see what are apparently the Second Years he expelled the year before we get absolutely no hint that after he re-enrolled them he taught them. Actually I'd say, especially with the way the one student commented on it and the rather incredulous looks the others had they probably didn't. We get very little impression that he either likes or really wants to teach (remember, he's not even the one who sent in the job application as we're shown in Vigilantes). So I don't think he'd normally go out his way to privately train someone unless he's had a sort of traumatic moment like USJ. Though. I would also say it's not a great look that he's not giving any outside training to his actual homeroom students, especially in light of how some do seem to be struggling and while you can argue they get additional training at internships, not all of 1-A got internships at first, and only really did during the winter because the HPSC made it a requirement. Which does actually now make me wonder if in theory you can go through all three years without ever doing one in the past, or if it was purely a requirement for Second and Third Years.

But yeah there’s a lot of issues with him as an educator that I really wish the series would at least touch on more.

#aizawa critical #read more

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thesherrinfordfacility · 9 months

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how in the world do you do it? i sent that ask yesterday and i'm still making my way through your masterpost kind of reeling- almost every moment i paused the show (s2 especially) and thought, that's weird, but couldn't put my finger on why, you've talked about, and expanded on, and it's all so well put. you're slowly curing the countless little ⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️ bouncing around in my head. it's so satisfying, too, to see all those asks with LWA disagreeing with popular fanon. i'd been thinking it was only me.

i'm curious about your interpretation of the bullet catch, specifically aziraphale's motives. i scrolled through a few of your tags and didn't find much about it, but i might have missed something.

i've seen people say it was retaliation for the holy water request (ooc?), or some deliberate test of crowley's willingness to go through with it (and so go through with their relationship, in spite of the danger, or something). then, of course, there's the generally accepted afaik "elaborate trust fall, general aziraphalean ridiculousness" version, but convincing somebody to nearly shoot you seems like a lot (understatement), even then.

it comes across to me as a bit cruel, if that makes sense. this isn't reliant on crowley not wanting to shoot him, or just doing well under pressure. if he's never even shot a gun before, this is almost entirely luck, and i don't buy that the only thing at stake is paperwork, however much they repeat it to themselves. crowley's hands wouldn't have been shaking so badly. if he messes up, he's gonna hurt aziraphale, or have to watch his human body die. it's so fucked.

maybe it could be said that, without their miracles working, they knew they were being watched, and had to continue, but i don't buy that either. aziraphale didn't act like he felt threatened afterwards until furfur showed up- was doing the complete opposite.

that's all i've got for now, but yeah. this blog is awesome and i'm so here for your sideburn theories. have a nice day pls

oh anon✨ you're so sweet!!! i really dk about all that, i just like chatting shit and trying to spot patterns/contradictory stuff/things that don't make sense beyond the script (if that makes sense), so whilst you all might not get Smart out of me you will at least get Passionate🤌

(also YES for LWA appreciation, they deserve it 💕 - still dont know why they do it but im just happy to be involved)

ooooh okay bullet catch. couple of thoughts from me:

aziraphale was happy to go on stage and try to ameliorate the situation between crowley and mrs h (my beloved), but reticent to scope out any Showy-Offy tricks from goldstones shop

crowley hyped aziraphale up enough to go into the shop and find a new trick to perform; hes the angel who fooled nefertiti and is performing on the West End Stage, after all!!!

aziraphale is taken in by the bullet catch trick upon seeing it, but was previously happy to consider another trick. he also, presumably, wasnt aware of the element of trusting a stooge until it was told to him

aziraphale persuades crowley to perform it, even when crowley is obviously uncomfortable, and crowley isn't truthful with him re: firearms experience

crowley agreed, providing that they make use of their miracles if it goes tits up

aziraphale doesnt inform crowley on any of the plan; crowley is notably caught unawares when called out in the audience

miracles don't work, neither of them stop the performance. crowley once again still very uncomfortable, literally shaking on stage, and yet seems to calm at aziraphale ploughing on ahead.

so okay, yeah, ive basically just recited the scene - but a few conclusions:

aziraphale doesn't want to let crowley down or embarrass him by backing out of the act, or indeed by messing it up

i think there's probably some element of aziraphale doing it for himself (self-esteem), but in a way that, post-Realisation, he is showing off a bit... it strikes me that crowley wasn't fully cognizant of this little hobby of his, and aziraphale is taking a moment to do something that (bless him, he thinks) he's good at, and wow crowley as a result

i don't think the holy water request came into his motivations at all, for the same reasons you said. however, it is an appropriate mirror to the holy water request narratively; i think it will come back up in s3, and i think the bullet catch will at least emotionally inform aziraphale on whether to give crowley the water or not

as for crowley's motivations in going along with it; i think to some extent he's paying back the favour, but mainly that it's truly just to make aziraphale happy. a step beyond that; to him, aziraphale is in need of something, and that is something aziraphale is only trusting crowley to deliver. crowley of course assumes miracles will be their safety net, so agrees to be aziraphale's knight in shining armour (*cough* playing hero)

when the miracles fail, aziraphale still has trust in crowley to do it properly. crowley however is left to trust in aziraphale's trust in kind. he still wants to do this for him, but the stakes are a bit higher in that he could shoot his best friend (?) in the face and not see him again on earth for any number of years (imo, it's never, ever been about the paperwork). but aziraphale isn't backing down; is crowley about to disappoint him? of course not.

tl;dr: they're both arseholes for their respective lacks of transparency with each other, deliberately put themselves in harm's way, and it was by sheer luck that they pulled it off. but it is a huge seismic shift in how they see each other, and i don't think we've been shown/suggested the full implications of the whole thing just yet.

thank you so much for your kind words, they honestly make my day!!! hope you have a lovely day too!!!✨💕

#good omens #ask #s2 meta #aziraphale meta #crowley meta #flashback meta #1941 spec

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inchidentally · 5 months

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tricky asks below! pls do not rb as that removes the readmore for some reason and I want to keep these out of tags <3

the fact that we're having to to discuss friendzoning about two friends anon we're really in it now aren't we

I want to take a moment direct ppl to this interview if they like Carlos tho bc his interviews are always so intelligent and thoughtful. you also get a much more authentic persona out of him when he speaks in Spanish. there are more videos on that account from that interview too.

I love that he listed Checo and Fernando so highly bc of course he gravitates toward ppl he can speak to in his born language. the three of them personality wise are pretty different but whenever they move toward each other you can tell they're in compatriot mode.

but yea what he said re Lando and racing is exactly what Lando says - and what nobody ever wants to post except begrudgingly. the 'bromances' are dressed way up by fans and media but there is no deeper narrative and it's not that serious. when they're driving, all friends disappear bc winning is the only reason to even be in F1 let alone the only way to stay in it for certain. even the comments on videos like that are next to nothing bc they're not "shippy" videos. but it's authentic and true that these guys are F1 drivers first and foremost and wayyyy after that it's nice to have some regular buddies to hang with. we should all be able to put shipping aside and appreciate the actual drivers these guys are and the fact that they can put aside their intense competitiveness to be so friendly.

asgfkasgfksag I love that last part anon. fr I've found it so funny that the larrie carlandos class Oscar in with all the women they despise bc it threatens their ship. it's like sexy Brazilian woman, sexy European woman, sexy IG Baddie, and... Oscar.

that's wild though about lestappen having their own larries. how in the hell do ppl look at Charles and Carlos and even bother pretending they dislike let alone hate each other. we literally have real life F1 examples of teammates who are neutral/uninterested in each other w KMag and Hulk and teammates who bitterly hate each other w Ocon and Gasly. if Charles and Carlos were even in a dislike/disinterest category we wouldn't see them giggling and touching right up to the last day at Abu Dhabi this year. and side note but we also wouldn't see their gfs enjoying spending time together during races and events either, which Alex and Rebecca do.

I've seen that too it's insane. when has Lando NOT considered Silverstone the most important race on the calendar for him?? and nothing will beat his high over that podium until his actual win, nothing. (the fact that he kept saying how Oscar deserved to be up there with him was just the icing on the cake)

and like can they please just remember here that Lando was excited and happy on that podium in Singapore for himself as well???? that his own result meant more to him than a Ferrari driver?? yes he was happy for Carlos but Lando is sort of an actual F1 driver and if he could've knocked Carlos' ass aside and gotten that top spot for himself he very. much. would. have!! and that the double podiums that followed meant more to him bc y'know the team he drives for get more points?? carlando is a miniscule part of Lando's F1 career and Carlos is less a part of his life than Max V in terms of drivers who spend non-driving related time with him. after that being George, Alex and Daniel. and then Carlos.

yea honestly I'm not sure if the larry element has always been in carlando fandom and the latest Netflix/Liberty Media commercialization of the ship has just amplified it or if these are a bunch of new ppl who only go for the unhinged accounts. but that side of the ship literally view Lando as someone who responds to Carlos and does nothing else so huge shock that they try to override his actual choices and his actual race weekend with Carlos literally years after Carlos left him for Ferrari.

I'm guessing it's enraging watching Carlos do with Charles all the jokey sexual/romantic things they kept wanting him to do w Lando but sorry folks for all that we slow down certain moments and obsess over them sharing an umbrella to walk down the pit lane it's literally brotherly behavior. I've got another anon who brought up my tags of carlando being Charles and Arthur and it straight up is. all the physical carlando stuff is what they do. and I say this as someone who fully does twist all those carlando moments into something romantic/sexual lol. but gotta be able to keep that line between reality and fantasy.

fortunately Lando is chronically online enough to brush this crap off and Carlos just sees the carlando fan stuff as decent publicity. but fingers crossed it doesn't escalate even further to Sky Sports or F1 pushing it and fans getting so crazed that Lando or Carlos has to put their foot down. if it's already swamping McLaren social media and Lando's fan accounts then expect it to get even worse.

the lack of Oscar's presence in all of these places is probably the lamest thing bc good lord the guy has a long term gf can they all admit that as Lando's ACTUAL teammate he has more relevance to Lando's career than any former teammate? and can McLaren please get their act together next season and bring back Unboxeds and stop splitting up Lando and Oscar content when they never did this with Carlos or Daniel?? sorry Oscar ain't a wacky character but we all happen to love his dynamic with Lando.

you just answered that question anon and it's exactly why I can't believe they want carlando back as teammates. as things are we get to have a nice sprinkle of carlando content throughout the season and no drama! do they truly want silly challenges videos so badly that they want to watch the entire friendship sink like a stone now that Lando would be challenging and beating Carlos AND that now it would be Lando as first driver and not Carlos? the Sainz family's warmth is there bc they never had to see Lando as a direct competitor or hindrance to Carlos' success. they'd turn on him in a fucking second when Carlos didn't get an update and Lando did or Carlos wanted to change the car but Lando didn't or Lando was the reason why Carlos missed out on a podium. the main reason why Charles and Carlos work so well through the drama is that they're such similar people and can keep a level head and distance from it all. Lando is n o t h i n g like Charles' personality. Lando cannot translate frustration and misery into anything, it just sits with him until he does better. Carlos literally said he didn't know what to do with Lando when he'd get into those funks. imagine all the god awful repeats of that carlando "breakup" clip from 2021 bc Lando can't hide anything on his face and he'd be fed up with Carlos or his family or himself and christ.

it would be so. so very bad. can they at least be happy that Lando's got a nice placid easygoing guy in Oscar as a teammate and carlando content still rolls in.

I could def see the fact that Oscar is neither older brother or younger brother age for Lando and they do all the same gen z references and the same hobbies is probably part of whatever they perceive as a "threat". like it's still such a reach but it would explain the way Lando fan accounts try to post as little Lando with Oscar as possible but dredge up 2019 slowed down Carlos shoulder bumps and shit lol.

truly I personally don't know if the Oscar and Carlos dingdongs play much of a part for carlando fans bc honestly Carlos has quite a few regular enemies on the track alsgfjlsagf. by this time they've got to know that. Carlos sometimes can't drop the red mist even hours after a race so Oscar just happens to have come in for a share in his rookie season! but especially with how much Carlos has actually seemed to chum around with Oscar before and after drivers parades etc (even ignoring Lando a couple times to do so !!!!!! gasp horror etc)

side note that I'd honestly be glad if Oscar chose never to get into golf bc ohhhhh the shit fit if he went golfing at the same time as Lando and Carlos. even though Lando golfs with tons of people and they always play in fours anyway.

I still personally think that the mostly straight women who buy into the bromances to the point of thinking this is how gay relationships actually look are pretty cold toward Oscar bc even Lando has said that Oscar's brought out a new level in Lando's driving and that he likes how calm Oscar is. so the fact that Oscar and Lando aren't fake gaying it up and they're also not doing a bunch of physical touch that can be edited and slowed down to look gay to those women has got to look like Lando being I guess unhappy or like they have no chemistry. so they'll allow that Oscar can be cute sometimes and maybe sometimes he can be cute with Lando. for a treat. but that in their mind Lando is meh about Oscar and is just dying to have the guy back who... actively chose to leave ??

I never saw that cartoon but I remember one from the summer that had Lando and Oscar together in a boat - SHIP CONFIRMED???? CARLANDO OVER??

jesus christ thankfully the drivers never see these comments.

and yikes at the meltdowns over that Carlos trip to Monaco bc he was with Rebecca the whole time and rumors were that they were looking at apartments. I do hate myself for liking gossip but it's literally in a sit back and enjoy the madness way lol.

askfgakg anon are you by any chance part of the sainz family?

(if I didn't answer your ask here it's probably bc it's something I'd rather discuss privately/don't want to stir up in fandom. feel free to message me tho <3 tumblr may also have devoured it bc it still does that sometimes)

#inchreplies #wank adjacent #do not reblog

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shzmluvrs · 5 months

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Hello! This is Star here, and I would just like to apologize on my own behalf for my disappearance.

Of course, this was not something I meant to do, but unfortunately, life catches up. I've been trying to focus on getting myself situated both mentally and financially, and when I was finally able to come back to this account, it occurred to me that I was ready to move on and do my own thing.

Not from Shazam! ofc tho, I'm still wildly obsessed with it/the characters and can not let go (like seriously, it's been years💀). But I also knew I was craving to do more, so...

On that note, I have made a new account for myself to continue there, along with being able to make content for other fandoms that I wouldn't mind receiving some support for :)!

And yes, I'm aware of the fact that I have some old requests stacked up, and the good news is...

I'm happy to and plan to still write them! And I will tag you once posted if you're not an anon.

The semi-bad news is, is that if you did leave a request as an anon, I won't be able to tag you, but it's still no worries. Hopefully, this message reaches who it needs to, and you'll be able to see your ask/request posted on my new account anyways, or you can just re-request there instead, either way works out🤷🏽‍♀️.

But even so, things are moving a bit slow mainly because of the things going on outside of Tumblr right now (I'll explain more in depth there sooner or later), so please be patient with me as my new account does its best to thrive and grow :').

Anyways, I have had so much fun on this account and though it only lasted a year or so, I'm so glad to have met some of the ppl I've met through here and I'm eager to start the new year off with something fresh...

@theyluvlyss /ᐠ-˕-マ

Feel free to show some support, stalk the new blog, whatever you wanna do :)!

Also, I'm not gonna totally abandon this account, I mean... I might reblog something every now and then, but as of right now, I'm taking my leave♡.

Oh! And if you have any other questions that this doesn't answer, plz feel free to ask lol.

~ Star✨️