#WHY IS IT HITTING ME SM HARDER READING THIS TIME | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

nouvxllev · 2 months

Note

"When I saw you

I fell in love, and

you smiled

because you knew

-William Shakespeare"

LOVE.LOVE.LOVE.

I wanted to make a request! I had a similar interaction like this, and when I had read this, I fell inloveeeeee with this qoute sm. Can you do a Wednesday x Reader? In which it's Wednesday who actually falls inlove 😭

amore, amore, amore.

Pairing: Author!Wednesday Addams x Gn!Reader

Summary: request!! ^^

Words: 6.0k (oh what the fuck)

Warnings: told in WEDNESDAYS POV AND ALTERNATE TIMELINES!, the gomezification of wednesday addams prevails, yes they meet at a museum, also kinda 7 husbands of evelyn hugo coded, slight plottwist at the end!

a/n: aaaa ofc ofc!! also i absolutely love the idea where wednesday fell first and harder

masterlist

I believe they cursed me the moment their lips became something worth fighting for.

"If they intend to halt my publishing, then so be it. I have no interest in entertaining that brain-dead company over countless of reasons as to why I shouldn't spare a few weeks for myself who believe I will fall under their will."

"Wednesday, they're the ones who publish your books, you just can't ignore their calls."

"Barclay, has your brain deteriorated to a degree in such a way that you are forgetting it's my presence that upholds that fucking company? Without me, they are nothing. Have you forgotten with how much power I withhold over them, or have your scales reached that hollow of a brain?"

"You can't ignore the leverage they have over you, sure you have the amount of money, if not more, to sue them, but they could literally tip you off and brand you as some selfish author."

"Please do comprehensively explain to me as to why I would be a selfish author?"

"Wednesday Friday fucking Addams, it's because you're half-way across the fucking world at some fucking museum in Italy while you have a manuscript due a fucking week ago!"

"I fail to see my fault."

"Addams, if you don't get your shit together, I swear—"

I had solved countless of murders in my time of Nevermore. I had one thing to do when I finally left, and I was going to succeed.

If you had told me after I willingly left that horrid place you call an educating institution that I would experience the same fate as an author, I would've traced the outer skin of your face with a pocket knife and display it on your family's doorstep.

Barclay, amongst others, remained someone I held close. She could be infuriating, but no one would ever be much deserving of a terrible, terrible position than be under my control as my manager when I pursued writing.

But no one tells you how people could easily forget you in a matter of seconds if you don't make a name for yourself when you've put yourself out there, even if it's something far, far from your own.

I was only fortunate enough people enjoyed what I publish.

I couldn't care less if they didn't, that's why I found it hard to give two shits about what that damned company thought of my revised schedule. But I needed to make a living. To make something out of myself.

If I had continued my actions— in which I have full control over with—I could lose everything.

I could've build it up from scratch if it happened, but Lucifer knows how long would a simple idea for a plot that could get into the lack of attention span of the population could take.

I could lose the name I print on paper.

I could lose my name.

And then I realized I haven't.

There was something that I was destined to fall under. It was there with my eyes taped to a painting, not knowing I became one for another.

I hung up. The mere thought of having a multistep plan to eventually murder my manager was between God and me. That woman had me teetering on the edge of becoming a one-hit serial killer overnight.

My head tilted over a large painting towering amidst the others down the line. My hands remained tucked deep within the pockets of a trench coat far too oversized for me.

I couldn't take much time of squinting, staring as if it had garnered my interest not after a dreaded phone call that I convinced myself truly took my energy and managed to inject anesthesia inside my veins.

A light sway became evident in my steps, as if I was sulking in my own woe of what I should and could've done to prevent myself fucking it up on a company that I could soon own if not me being under the age of what is required to own a firm without having to ring up my own godforsaken of a family.

I could almost take another step if I wasn't met with another person.

Countless of papers flew across the hard-tiled floor. It was over before I knew what had happened. I found myself standing there, eyes glued to the person I collided with, my eyebrows crossed and my mouth hung open like a fool.

"I'm—I'm so sorry, fuck." They grit under their breath, like they were berating themselves while they picked up the rest of what had fell.

I stood there, not knowing what to do or what not to do but stare at them and wait for them to pull themselves up.

And so that's what I did.

I wish I hadn't.

Because now it was the time I was unable to speak. Unable to use the words I've been writing my novels with, the words that I should've spoken in the seconds they had landed in front of me. For the first time, my words had failed me.

A question rang in my head, Why do I now feel as if I do not belong inside of my own body? Why does my life feel complete now that they were here?

When Y/n fixed herself, she looked at me and smiled. I knew I looked like an idiot staring at them, yet I never went out of my way to barely fix myself.

Why were they smiling?

"Why are you smiling?" I asked under my breath, like I was taken breathless. I hadn't mean to say it out loud, but my cold and otherwise damned heart seemed to be alive, like I was suffocating in my own rate. A fool in front of them I must've been.

They looked at their paper, then they looked at me.

They smiled yet again. Another question flicked across my head, what had happened to me to act as if I would go through hell and back for this person?

They smiled at me as if my presence gave them a reason to. And they loved me in every one of it.

"Sorry—" they apologized, noticing how their thumb kept grazing the surface of their sketch, almost as if they were nervous. "You look prettier than... whatever I drew."

They stole one more look of me.

"Terrifyingly bewitching."

It's horrifying knowing I couldn't explain what I felt that day. What I know is—I felt everything.

I've endured endless remarks on my appearance ranging from a number of ratings from those nonsensical people on the internet to every synonym people have thrown my way only to fail to evoke even a flicker of emotion.

Though it seems egotistical, I knew they held one intention: they wanted to impress me. They wanted me to know they were different amongst others who have approached me. They wanted to entice me, as if I could be owned.

Were it not for the arsenal and threats I carried, there would be much more.

Y/n was different. They never had any intentions of being with me, no desire to impress or claim me as theirs. They simply wanted me to know I was. That it was true. I just had never heard it from someone who could mutter two words that felt perfect.

And it's much more terrifying knowing I unexpectedly fell first, even if I deny myself.

I could tell you about the way y/n smiled, how it seemed to threaten the sun, warning it not to shine lest it risk embarrassment in contrast of hers. I could tell you the way their eyes followed their smile, how their life was encapsulated in their drawings, mirroring what they felt.

Yet, when it comes to explaining how I fell for them, words escape me. Even I, a tortured author, struggle to describe.

How must I convey the sensation of my heart pounding in my ears as if it was trying to break me? The ache in my stomach, churning every chance it got, every fiber of my being dreadfully surrendering to them.

But one is for certain: meeting them was like coming home.

My home.

But I couldn't bring myself to realize that—It was antagonizing for me. Humiliating and mortifying knowing one person could make me become a total fool, become someone I've never thought I'd be.

I've spent my whole life after hiding what I felt for them, lest I risk experiencing what I truly loathe: love.

I despised them ever since I met them, loathed them, hated them. But for what for? I ask myself countless of times, I have never gotten an answer.

When they left, I left. Thinking it would be fate that had accidentally brought two people together who held no meaning for eachothers life, that it was a mistake, and I could've been wrong with how I'm feeling.

And when I came back, they were there.

And when I approached them, it felt right.

It was a week after the incident, but no matter how I tried, I still remember how their smile felt around me. Suffering, irritating, lovely. Like I wanted to relieve it, no matter how much time had passed.

Never once did I get their name in the span of meeting them, it was useless to know anyway.

Yet, I find myself returning to the museum every chance I get for God knows what, acting as if I had unfinished business staring at paintings while the staff rambled beside me. They were better off tattooing their explanation in my skull.

I had other places to attend to, other tasks I should've been doing rather than constantly visiting museum in the afternoon as if I have duties and low-paid labor for employment.

I should've been at my apartment days ago, exhausting myself on a half-assed manuscript I would have recurring thoughts of annihilating along with severing Bianca's hands through the phone.

What terrified me is why I was back.

Standing in front of them. My hands tucked deep inside the pockets of another trench coat, looking down on them sitting on one of the blocks of granite surrounding a oddly placed tree in the middle of the hall, drawing whatever there is to draw.

"Hello." I greeted them. They almost looked startled, surprised that I was even talking to them, like I was some vengeful ghost who returned to seek revenge. Though they weren't far off.

They looked up, immediately flipping over their clipboard as they locked eyes with me.

"Oh—" They cleared their throat, "Hi. Hey, hello." They smiled, albeit awkward. But that feeling of dread, or whatever, came back. Stronger than ever, I feared. I almost had half the mind of punching them in the gut and questioning them why they had this effect on me.

"Didn't know you come here often." A chuckle followed their question, or maybe it was a statement, placing their elbows on their lap while they gazed right at me.

I scoffed, murmuring against gritted teeth why did I even approach them in the first place. "And I didn't know you draw me that often."

I look down on the piece of paper, their deliberate and aggressive brush strokes having an effect on the paper, leaving marks upon marks. It was clear that I've been their subject for days on end. Even if I were to absent, I'd still be able to be the pinnacle of their sketches.

It was funny back then, humorous in my mind on how quick they snatched the piece of paper and tried to explain with little to no comprehension that went across their mind.

"Oh, God, no, no! I just—Okay, well, maybe I've been drawing you ever since I saw you, it's creepy now that I mention it... but it's just—it's dumb of me to not draw you, you know?" They were flustered, their mouth opening and closing only for me to receive words that were out of the dictionary.

They sighed, my lips twitched.

"I'd like to ask," My voice trailed off, grimacing even at the thought of having to initiate a conversation with more or less than five words, "What's... your name?"

"Y/N," They nodded, "L/N. Y/N/L/N." They reached out for a handshake only to immediately retract after a brief awkward seconds of staring. Their name sounded familiar.

"Why are you here?"

"Do I need to reason to?"

"I suppose so, no. But I am curious." Even I don't know why I'm still back here.

Y/n sighed, like I was the one getting on their nerves while it was me who battling against whatever fucked-up demon spawned in my stomach that caused me to feel, things.

"Nothing."

I frowned. "You came here because of.... Nothing?"

"Mhm."

"You are drawing strangers you know nothing about because of nothing?"

"Thought I made myself clear on that first word."

"You've made yourself look foolish than any average person."

"Well, you never told me your name. I think that's foolish enough over my case."

It was my turn to sigh.

"Addams." I reluctantly said to them, "Wednesday, Addams."

Then Y/n looked up at me as if I was some sort of otherworldly deity going back down to earth to finish whatever I started. "Wednesday Addams. I think I've heard that name before."

"No. No, you haven't."

If it wasn't horribly obvious, the sole purpose of my visit to Italy was to neglect everything I left behind in New York—especially deadlines— and hoped my eyes would finally work some sense that would let me start anew.

It was shameful of me, passion that dwindled into something less. If I had the chance, I would've tortured myself for even considering abandoning all of my life's work.

Though, I had my reasons. Even if I had threatened my target population and my audience, it still wouldn't be enough.

In short, I had lost motivation to pursue another book.

I felt as if there was something missing, that I couldn't even dare to even blow the collecting dust in the rims of my typewriter.

I begged for my brain to work, to even produce the slightest idea or word that could have some meaning to it. I was ready to write anything that came to mind, even if it was mediocre.

But, instead, my heart responded.

When I met Y/n, I started writing, and we started talking.

Words flowed through, and my time was wasted on Y/n.

My time was wasted, and they were wasted with their significant other.

I always thought I would suffer the thought of having to live an eternal life with none other than myself, that it was inevitable I was going to perish alone in my own woe.

It remained the same. Now, it's just having to live with the fact that my only greatest love had another.

I felt as if I ate a forbidden fruit once I heard they had someone that loved them as much as I denied myself of the same kind, like I plagued myself with hundreds of years of worry and attachment to someone who had eyes on another, a special muse they had.

Only that I would crumble immediately, tempted to take the fruit in my hands, forever stain my lips of something immoral so that I could forever crawl and weep over them.

In my time in Italy, I thought i'd be avoiding acquaintances that would be much more of a burden to me rather than someone useful. Yet there I was, watching Y/n saunter into my life like the revelation they were.

It's safe to say that Y/n turned out to be anything but a burden. They became someone I looked forward to seeing every day, though I hadn't realized they were motivation until then.

"Wends!"

Their awfully cheerful voice pierced through the air of the restaurant, almost granting the attention from other people as if they shared the same horrendous and dreadful nickname as me.

As much as I fantasized about walking out of the restaurant with y/n's half-broken jaw, I couldn't deny whatever was swirling in my head.

Ever since they knew of that wretched nickname unfortunately given to me by none other by that infectious and the ever infuriating ball of sunshine, Enid Sinclair, they've been calling me it as if I don't have a birth name.

It was a month ever since I've known Y/n, and it was a month of them being a constant presence in my life. They shared breakfast with me, lunches, and sometimes dinners that I somehow always and reluctantly accepted.

They became my routine, and it was a fact I'd sooner die with than confess to anyone.

Y/n slowly approached my table that was filled to the brim with countless of books and my oddly placed typewriter, putting their own stuff down on the seat beside them. "You're here early. You ordered something yet?"

It was 12PM. We agreed on 1, and I came at 10.

I scoffed, keeping my eyes on the typewriter. "You, of all people, should know by now that I would much rather sooner paint myself neon than touch anything on this menu."

I hear y/n setting their elbows on the table, resting their face between their hands. "Aw, c'mon Wends, it wouldn't kill you.

"Cyanide won't, but this will." I stopped writing to take one look at them, obviously and oddly, my gaze never and will never work on them. "Take my advice if you're eager to leave this restaurant with a mouth able to eat and speak."

"Ever the happiest person, Wends." They chuckled, sliding a somehow too bright and colorful menu towards them, "I'll order for you."

I stopped writing all together, "Y/n."

"Wednesday." They raised an eyebrow, a smile tugging at her lips. It was over before I was even playing the game. Resistance over their lips felt futile anyway.

"Fine." I sighed, shutting my eyes closed just so that for once I can't have my stomach doing fucking acrobatics at the sight of them. "I will... allow it."

The ever-growing smile that crept up to their face was priceless, I couldn't bring myself to pry my eyes away. Murmuring something along the lines that I was too easy to lure in.

Once a waiter passed our table, Y/n ordered something along the lines of whatever the fuck 'Due Cream Soda Alla Vaniglia e Lampone con Glitter Commestibili' was. I was certain I was going to leave the restaurant with a non-working heart and a stomach turning inside and out.

It took no longer than a minute for Y/n to get a hold one of the numerous books piled infront of me. "Are you studying for something?" They asked, opening it only to close it once they noticed how outdated some of the languages are.

I let a small chuckle pass my lips. "What drives you to such a hypothesis."

They gestured to the books and my typewriter, "By how you're literally surrounded by books and you're on a fucking typewriter instead of a laptop." They pointed out, murmuring another, "Also, who the hell says hypothesis."

"People with functioning frontal lobes." I quipped, letting my fingers write on instinct across the typewriter keys as I listened to Y/n's ramblings. "I'm... writing."

"You're an author?"

"No."

"Then why—"

"Are you a painter? An artist?"

"Well... I—no?"

"Then we both don't know what we're doing."

Y/n fell silent moments after, I couldn't help but miss the sound of their voice. Admitting the mere thought aloud seemed absurd, let alone thinking it in the first place. I would've bashed my head on top of my typewriter if not for my resistance.

"How long will you be staying in Italy?" they eventually asked.

"Two more weeks," I replied. "My flight is already scheduled, I'll be leaving then on."

"Oh."

I wasn't expecting an answer anything other than a hint of happiness that I was eventually leaving their life.

"You are?" They repeated, as if they couldn't believe such a statement even escaped my lips, clear disappointment flickering across their face. "That's not... long."

"I am certainly not saying here indefinitely now that I have something to continue when I've arrived at my destination." I cleared out, doing my very best to escape the impending guilt washing over me.

"I'll miss you, Wednesday."

Their words were sincere. Lovely. It had stopped me from writing all together.

Guilt wasn't a feeling I was familiar with at the time. I rarely come across such a feeble emotion. Now it felt like I've committed something immoral. There were times that I lie for my own convenience, and nothing more than my own reason.

Now it felt like I should've lied for them.

I will forever miss you.

I wrote. I never showed them.

One week had passed and I rarely ever got to see Y/n after. Our encounters became increasingly scarce, and their voice plagued me from days on end.

I clung to the faithless hope I had that they would text me, to reach out, to even show me they're alive and well.

I returned to the museum for every day they were absent in my life, searching for any sign of their presence, but each day ended in disappointment.

Of course, fate is indifferent to my yearning, refusing to grant someone I so desperately sought.

Regret gnawed at me as the days turned into a week, and the week turned into the day before my flight.

"Addams. I've heard from others that you've been writing."

"Who others?"

"I'll spare a name to spare New York a corpse found in their sewage pipes by the time you've, hopefully I assume, returned and not jump off the plane."

"Even if I went off the grid, your nagging would've been in spirit."

"Don't flatter me."

"Don't kill yourself without showing me a video tape in full resolution for me to get through rough weeks. Or maybe take a shotgun and shoot yourself in your garage and let me have the keys to your house."

"Addams."

I sigh. "Yes, the rumors—though I would want that vampires head on a stake—are true. I've been writing."

"What happened to you there? You met someone?"

"How'd you know—No. No, I—I haven't. What makes you come to such a foolish conclusion?"

"Oh my God, someone actually managed Wednesday—I'd rather kill myself before loving anyone—Addams to fall terribly in love with them. Who's the unfortunate soul?"

"I would not be naming them because they do not exist."

"You just stuttered, Wednesday. The only thing making you stumble your words is when you're overdosing on whatever poison you're having for breakfast."

"They're no one."

"How are you such a bad liar when you have countless of bodies hidden across the globe?"

I sigh again, this time, it was out of annoyance. "I'll be hanging up. Goodbye, Barclay. If ever you are considering to kill yourself, call me. I'll be at my most happiest to watch."

"Wait, no, Wednesday! I need progress on your—"

I hung up. It was pointless to answer her calls when I was a mere few step away from boarding a plane. She always had a way of getting under my skin, even from across the damn globe.

But there was one name that would always surface in my thoughts: Y/n.

The mere thought of their name will forever remind me of how my heart wasn't programmed to love.

I reached for my phone, fingers tracing over the cold screen. My mind was tired, blank. The only thing I could ever do is stare at their contact and wish I could've done something better.

I typed out a hesitant message, my thumb hovering over the send button as if it was something that could end my world. Only two thoughts ran to my mind: Would they reply, or would my message be nothing to them?

I almost hit send before I heard footsteps approaching me.

"Y/n?"

I whispered their name, the love I carried for them being surrendered like I'd crawl for them once I reached purgatory.

"What are you doing here?" My eyebrows furrowed. How could they leave me, only to return as I was about to depart? "Why are you here, you disappeared, avoided me, why—"

"He proposed to me."

Oh.

I always thought a near-death experience with a loved one would be the deepest I could feel.

I realized I was wrong.

Now my eyes ached to the sting. Like I was weeping for someone that perished in my heart, I grieve for a living soul that was me. It was pathetic.

I expected them to be overjoyed, over the moon as they would express themselves from time to time.

But when I met their eyes, all I saw were tears streaming down their face.

Oh, how I wished to wipe their worries away.

"Then why are you crying?"

"I don't know if I love him."

"Nonsense... You told me you loved him—"

"Well, maybe I haven't been saying anything true to you!"

"Look, I don't know what I'm doing—I don't know what the hell are we doing. I'm living in some apartment with some guy I don't even know I even love, I'm currently standing here like an idiot to a girl who's just about to leave my life, and you're—"

"You're everything."

It was that moment I realized I was lost in a haze of admiration and love for Y/n.

That I was far too deep in their life that they became mine. I never knew I needed them as much when I told them to leave with me and break up with their significant other.

I never knew I needed their lips onto mine until the moment I pulled them close to me.

Now I ache of them.

"Do you regret it, mother? Being such a fool for someone, you became what you hated most. But you endured it all for them."

Wednesday Addams, seating across the bed from her daughter, Blair Addams. She looked just like you, she'd always wonder.

Wednesday sighed, her hand reaching out to gently touch Blair's. "Do you know the phrase, 'Come ti vidi M’innamorai, E tu sorridi Perchè lo sai?'" she asked softly.

"You know I've never indulged myself in whatever you're reading." She shook her head with a smile. She looked even more like you.

She let her fingers trace patterns on her hand, her gaze wandering else where. "Well, it translates to 'When I first met you I fell in love, and you smiled because you knew," she explained.

"And do you believe in that, mother?"

Wednesday could almost smile. Her daughter was always the curious one, yet she always managed to be privy of her life from them. "I always believed Y/N knew the moment we first laid eyes on each other, I fell in love with them."

"So, yes, my raven." She nodded, "I do."

"I never knew Y/n would make me their title, their theme, their muse," Wednesday pondered, "I always wondered why i fell for them."

"Falling is an accident, gullible, like with people who fail to do basic things. But I am one of those people if not more if I fell for their on accident and continued to do so."

She sat beside Blair, her legs crossed beside her. "I've never told you at the time, but Y/n was a painter. And they wanted nothing more but than to forget about their past. They have never told me as to why, but I believe them.""

"I worried that my love was violence. It was pain, it was suffering. But y/n took care of themselves, they took care of me. There is no one in the world who had loved me more than them, I fear that it would break them, that I am deemed no longer someone who is a part of their story."

"Yet here we are."

Wednesday couldn't see the smile creeping from her daughters lips. But she knew it was there, just like how you looked like before. She will always and forever take pride in it.

She always thought her greatest love could be something of a passion, a talent, a hobby perhaps.

But no one told her it could be a person.

Blair stretched and turned on a light beside her bed, opening a drawer and taking out two of Wednesday's books. "Must they be the reason your books has been off to your prior ones, mother? You've written all your life of gore and mystery. Now it's romance."

"Well, I—"

"Oh, I'm definitely the reason why your mother has been subtly—not-so-subtly, switching to the romance genre."

You peered through the door, your body wrapped up in a cozy boritto style and everything with a train draping it's way to your back like some met-gala dress.

"Oh, mon chéri," Wednesday's face lit up at the sight of you, immediately standing up and pulled you close, her arms enveloping you in a warm embrace.

Her lips met yours in soft kisses, leaving the taste of faint vanilla chapstick lingering on your lips. "Why are you up so late?"

"Well," You grinned against her lips, "I felt our bed getting cold and to my surprise my wife isn't nowhere near me. You know how I can't sleep without you." She pulled away, you whined at the lost of contact, but you couldn't smile more brightly as she led you towards your daughter. "G'evening, Blair."

"Evening, Y/n." She greeted you before you kissed her on the forehead.

You leaned against Wednesday's shoulder, whispering softly, "You're telling her our story again?"

Wednesday would've thought her small chuckle went unnoticed, but you definitely heard it. The stupid smile on your face told everything.

Her hand found yours, giving it a gentle squeeze. "She loves it."

"You love it, mother. Probably more than me." Blair retorted back, evident that she was holding back a laugh.

"I do not! When did I ever—"

"Oh, honey, you know love turns your mother into a girl version of your abuelo.

"Do not ever refer to me as my love drunk father or I will subject you to sleeping on the couch." Wednesday rolled her eyes, pinching the back of your palm. "And please do not shame my work of referring to it as such. I've worked hard day and night yet you proceed call it by such an exasperate—"

You turned your head and pressed a kiss on her cheek, the same spot where her freckles resided, causing her to pause mid-sentence. After atleast ten years of being with her, it always made you so giddy.

"Not even in marriage am I spared by your passive aggressive comments," you teased, your lips curling into a smile as you leaned in closer to her.

You hear your daughter sigh after a brief second, "Addams."

Wednesday almost looked shocked, "My Raven, do not call us by our last—"

"Please exit my room. I'll be going to sleep."

And then, the both of them were shoved off before they could even hug their daughter and kiss her goodnight like they always did.

"I... We were rejected, Y/n." Wednesday exclaimed, like she just got struck with the most heartbreaking news. "She used to love our stories together when she was an infant."

You'd think Wednesday was the non-chalant mom who's strict on her child. But, to your surprise, she was the opposite.

She loved Blair just as much she loved you. Hell, you even considered just maybe, maybe not, disowning your daughter because she gets Wednesday's attention more than you do.

You shrugged, taking her hand and leading her to your upstairs bedroom. "It gets stale once in a whileeeOW!" You winced as Wednesday pinched the back of your palm, again. It was starting to become her love language at this point.

"I'm just kidding!" You reassured her, intertwining your fingers with hers as you walked up the stairs together, pulling the door open for your wife. "She's just in her rebellious teen phase, let it go."

Wednesday rolled her eyes, "Too cliche."

"You used to have one too," you scoffed, settling onto your side of the bed and watching as she laid down on hers.

It was a routine you found yourself often doing, taking in the sight of your beloved as if your life with Wednesday was all a dream. You pinch yourself like almost thrice a day just to really make sure.

"Since when?" Wednesday asked, raising an eyebrow in amusement, quietly shuffling towards you.

You sat up for a moment to undo her braids. You always liked playing with her hair, and that one time she asked of you to undo hers, it became a routine. "Since the beginning of time. And somehow, you never grew out of it."

"You didn't even meet me in my teenage years. I am far from rebellious."

"Yes, baby, but not too far from a death penalty." You chuckled, reaching out to gentle stroke her hair, leaning in to press a soft kiss against her forehead.

"Oh, you flatter me," she replied, a smirk across her lips, but the room was too dim to even notice it.

By now, if you were any ordinary person, Wednesday would've made you disappear entirely. But, the thing is, Wednesday always seemed to look at you as if her life never really started until she found you.

Silence managed to take over the atmosphere, you laid back on the comfortable mattress, feeling Wednesday's head nestled on your arms that were tucked under her hair.

You could almost fall asleep in pure bliss knowing that you've met and loved the girl of your dreams if not for her calling out for you.

"Amore." She whispered.

"Amore?" She whispered again, her voice softer than ever before.

You blinked, momentarily. You swore you just heard an angel. "Yes, amore?"

"Can I... Can you—"

You smiled, almost too knowingly. You knew Wednesday, for someone who's such a romantic soul, she's not too expressive on simple terms like these. "Do you want to be the little spoon?"

She grimaced, you could even hear her grunts of disapproval. "I would highly refrain from calling it that before I jump out of bed and skin you from limb to limb. But... yes, I would like to."

A soft chuckle escaped your lips at her response, suppressing a grin to avoid from literally being murdered as you wrapped your arms around her and pulled her close.

Ten years before, if someone had told you that you're going to be doing this to girl you've met at a museum while trying to escape your past, let alone be happily married to her, you would've told them "How the fuck do you know that and please stay away, I have... a boyfriend. I guess."

But now, it seemed so believable. Wednesday was always so relaxed in your arms, your warmth and hers bringing a sort of comfort for the both of you.

You nuzzled your head against the back of her neck, gently moving strands of her hair aside as you pressed soft kisses against her skin, hoping to kick away her tension from the day.

"Stop pouting, Wends," you murmured softly into her skin as you closed your eyes in pure relief.

You hear her scoff, "I am not doing such a humiliating act."

"Oh but you so are." Your grin widening as you pressed another gentle kiss against her nape, "I can hear it from here."

Wednesday let out a sigh, of annoyance? Maybe. But was it tinged with pure adoration and love? Much so. "You don't hear pouts, Y/n."

"When it comes to you, I do and I can."

Silence washed over. This time, you're worried you've teased her that much, she actually got annoyed with you.

"You're awfully quiet. By this time, you're probably threatening to kill me."

"I'm... Sorry." Wednesday whispered, it has an undying tone of tenderness that you don't often see it being expressed through words from her. Slowly, she shifted her body to face yours.

One thing is for certain: She was still so terrifyingly bewitching if not more. She looked pretty in every way possible, it's hard to even believe, it left you in awe.

You feel her gaze darting on your eyes and then drifting down to your lips, hesitating even. It was ridiculous, in the most adorable way possible there is for an Addams like her.

"May I kiss you?"

"You know you're always welcome. It's pointless to ask."

She was the first to reach out, her hand finding it's way to the curve of your cheek, her touch gentle than ever as she traced the line of your jaw as if she was memorizing every feature of yours.

You cupped her face in reciprocation, leaning in closer to where your lips were just hovering inches away from hers. Then, you closed the space between the both of you.

You pulled away, your eyes meeting hers with a soft smile. It was impossible to think that this woman held your heart in her hands like it was nothing.

"Have I ever told you that you're pretty?" you whispered, letting your hands fall to her waist and pulled her close.

"Ever since you've met me."

“You know, I’m surprised you even remember our first meeting.”

“Oh, how could I ever forget my lover?”

You laughed, a symphony that always gets Wednesday to have a slight tug in her lips. “Stop being so romantic. You are a grown woman with a daughter.”

You continued to stare into her eyes as you drape the rest of the blanket for the both for you. "It's hard to think you're the first one to fall in love and not me."

"It's hard to think of anything when you're here with me, te amo." Wednesday replied, her gaze softening almost immediately.

You sighed. "You know I love you, right?"

Wednesday blinked. "I always will."

You smiled.

And Wednesday smiled back.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

a/n: this was longer than i thought. i yap too much in stories i fear

#wednesday x reader #wednesday addams x gnreader #wednesday addams x gn!reader #wednesday addams x you #wednesday addams #jenna ortega x reader #jenna ortega x you #jenna ortega x y/n #jenna ortega #jenna marie ortega #jenna ortega x female reader

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sughuru · 6 months

Text

you, me, and the sky above

- gojo satoru x reader

In the quiet stillness of the night, you find yourself waking to an empty bed, wondering where Satoru disappeared to. As you search for him throughout your shared home, you discover him staring into the dark sky, his eyes revealing the weariness from a challenging mission.

genres/warnings: angsty, fluff, hurt/comfort

notes: hello hello this is my first post on this acc so if you'd like to read more of my work, come check out my other works! my first language isn't english so don't mind the grammatical errors, sorry! :') anyways i love satoru sm u dont understand

home | masterlist

—

You woke up to the bed being empty and cold. Strange, you could’ve sworn Satoru went to bed with you last night. You grabbed your phone to check the time, reading 3:02 AM. It's barely three; where did he go? You got on your feet and slowly dragged yourself out of the bedroom to look for the man.

“Babe?’ you called out, flicking the light switch on in the bathroom, assuming he went to the toilet but there was no one. Then to the kitchen it was, maybe he needed a cup of water–But that wouldn’t make sense; he always has a cup of water by the bed in case either of you wakes up feeling thirsty. Perhaps he went out for a run, or was it an emergency mission; still, he would’ve told you. Just when you were about to give up, you noticed him.

Satoru, your boyfriend, staring out into the dark sky. What was he searching for? Upon closer inspection, you noticed the dark circles around his eyes, his eyes were slightly puffy, his blindfold dangling loosely around his bare neck.

Surprisingly, he didn’t sense your presence, he always managed to notice you but tonight, his thoughts seem to be elsewhere.

"Satoru," you said softly, approaching him cautiously. The moonlight highlighted the contours of his face, and you could see the weariness etched into his expression. You knew about how exhausting the mission was yesterday, even his facade wasn’t strong enough to fool you. Yet, you didn’t say anything, not wanting to upset him any further.

"Is everything okay?" you asked, your concern evident in your voice. Satoru turned to you, and for a moment, it seemed like he hadn't expected anyone to notice his silent contemplation. His eyes, usually vibrant with energy, now carried the weight of unspoken burdens.

Satoru hums in response, a quiet one. Usually, he would whine about how the higher-ups made him do such a tough mission or how he has to work overtime, missing out on spending time with you. Tonight, he just stayed silent.

"I didn't mean to worry you," he said, his voice carrying a weight you hadn't heard before. "I’m sorry.” he dryly laughed, plastering a smile on his face, except, that smile didn’t reach his eyes. You frowned, realizing that he wasn’t letting his guard down anytime soon.

"Don’t," you responded gently, your hand resting on his.

Satoru took a deep breath, his gaze shifting away for a moment before returning to meet yours. “I just... I needed a moment,” he admitted, his voice soft but laden with sincerity. “The mission, it hit me harder than I thought.”

For a moment, Satoru's shoulders relaxed a fraction, as if the weight he carried had found a temporary respite. "The mission...it took a toll on me more that it should have, I-”

You squeezed his hand, offering a silent reassurance. "You don't have to go into details if you're not ready. But know that I'm here to listen whenever you're ready to share."

The two shared a moment of peaceful silence.

You prompted gently, "Is that why you're awake?"

Satoru shook his head, his gaze momentarily dropping. "Bad dream," he admitted, the vulnerability in his voice belying his usual confidence.

Your heart sank at the revelation. "Satoru-" you whispered, tightening your grip on his hand.

Satoru sighed, and a playful glint entered his eyes. "What happened to 'you don't have to go into details'?" he asked, a lighthearted tone replacing the previous heaviness in his voice.

You couldn't help but smile at the sudden change in atmosphere. "Well, you know me," you replied, matching his playful tone, "I can’t help it, I’m nosy.” she pouts

Satoru chuckled as he pulled her into his arms tightly, “come here, you’ll get cold.” He looked up at the stars again, admiring them. You couldn’t help but admire him. His blue eyes, they always shone brightly even in the darkest of nights.

"Come on," you said gently, offering a reassuring smile. "Let's head back inside. We can talk more if you want, or we can just sit in silence. Whatever you need."

Satoru's grip on the balcony’s railing loosened, and he followed you back into the warmth of the indoors. As you closed the door behind you, you couldn't help but hope that the darkness outside wouldn't linger within him for much longer.

“I love you, you know that?” he smiled, this time, reaching his eyes. You smiled back, “I love you too.”

Satoru’s blue eyes that were dulled moments ago, now sparkled with hope and love once again. Leaning in, you pressed a soft kiss against his forehead, a promise of warmth and solidarity.

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cressthebest · 2 months

Text

Crimson Rivers thoughts pt. 12

chapter 22:

1. 😟😟 all james wants is for sirius to be there for james the way james ALWAYS was for sirius

2. 😟 james wished hodge happy birthday even though hodge died yesterday. i- i am not okay

3. “Regulus never fails to look up. Evan would be proud of him for that, he thinks.” 😧 that was vile to put in there

4. james has resorted to BEGGING for medicine from sirius and can’t understand why sirius won’t send any. this hurts so bad

5. nope. i’m done. i can’t read any more. james started looking forward to death cause he would be out of this arena and out of pain. jfc i’m done

6. anyways. i’m back cause i couldn’t stop reading.

7. REGULUS AND JAMES ARE REUNITED!!! THANK GOD!!! 😊

8. 😧 wait nevermind. james just mistook regulus for sirius. “James has never, not once in his life under any circumstances, mistaken Regulus for Sirius”

9. james is delulu from medicine and reg just found out that the plan has always been to get reg home. this hits like a motherfucking truck

10. james is high as a fucking kite, can’t figure out why “sirius” is being mean to him, cause he’s never been mean to him. and is also wondering why “sirius” is oddly attractive for being mean

11. it takes james half a chapter, and reg cutting his shirt for james to realize it’s not sirius. cause sirius has different scars. i love james sm 😭😭

12. “What was Sirius thinking? Drugging James? In the middle of the fucking hunger games? That might be the most idiotic thing Regulus has ever known his brother to do, and this is Sirius he's talking about, so that's saying a lot. Sirius once flipped a cigarette in the air and tried to catch it with his mouth while it was lit, and kept doing it until he could actually consistently manage it, no matter how much it burned him. Though, in fairness, he can still do that trick to this day.”

LMAO WHAT??? that’s so random and i love it

13. 😧 legit sobbing. reg says that james lost the spark in his eyes. and he’s the one person he expected to never lose his spark

14. reg reveals that they both can go home. james’ spark is back. i’m sobbing harder now. they’re so in love

15. i eat, breathe, and dream those author end notes. bizzarestars writes their end notes the way my brain processes the fic. <33

chapter 23:

1. starting the chapter off with pain, i see. losing vanity changed james. like. horribly changed him.

2. “What Regulus hates more than James is his suffering.” jfc he’s so emotionally constipated

3. james is sad and all reg can think is hmmmm i want him to start flirting with me again, because it meant he was happy bitch wtf

4. awww they’re cuddling and just got a package! my babies are gonna make it out!

5. reg realizes he has to put on a show, so he offers to feed james. and wants to gouge his eyeballs out for offering that. 😭😭😭😭

6. i’m dying from embarrassment but this is also so fucking funny. reg is like. let’s talk about our feelings. for each other. and james is just like *head tilt* ???

7. “"You weren't my first crush, James," Regulus whispers. "You were my first love."”

james didn’t just make reg feel good, he made reg feel and i am NOT okay.

8. “This whole time, Regulus has been steady on the fact that he wouldn't kiss James to save his own life, but he's apparently willing to do it to save James'.”

JFC why is he so emotionally constipated???

9. THEY KISS????? james is gonna be heartbroken when he realizes it was all an act

10. oh thank god james realized. at least it broke his heart now and not in two weeks

11. *squints* now reg has never wanted anything more than this kiss. girl. please. realize.

12. god, i’ve never read a kiss more beautifully and emotionally desperate written.

13. 😏 reg called him baby again!

14. oh god, maybe i’m just as bad as everyone in the hallow. maybe i’m just as bad as them. cause i enjoy their romance. i enjoy it so much. maybe i’m just as bad as the hallow for that. i- i think this every time i read the hunger games.

15. “James wants to sink his teeth into Regulus and leave the deep imprints of his teeth from one jutting hip bone to the other.” sometimes i forget that jegulus is a little unhinged in ways like this. and every time i’m reminded, I LOVE IT

16. “"You treat me like I'm stupid for daring to see good in people, but if there's no good in anyone, then what's the fucking point?"”

this entire section. this. this is what james is all about

17. 😟 authors note just told me i’m no better than a hallow. for my excitement over jegulus. and- yeah. i guess so. i’m so sorry y’all

#marauders #regulus black #james potter #jegulus #fanfic #sirius black #sunseeker #starchaser #crimson rivers

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jooillusion · 2 months

Note

omg hi.. i really like the way you write and i love to read your smuts...it's my first time asking but i was wondering this these days.. me and seungmin are in a friends dinner and he start to become jealous of the way jooyeon is treating me and then he can't wait for us to get home and we end up having sex in the car, like with fingering, blowjob and lots of dominance... just wondering...

jealous sex with seungmin <3

warnings: unprotected car sex, oral (69), fingering

omg my anons sure do love seungmin hehehe (i literally don’t blame you guys 💔) but thank you sm my love <3 I appreciate the support :)

jooyeon gets really playful.

at first it wasn’t a big deal and you didn’t want to hurt his feelings, so you ended up being a little bit playful back. it’d go from laughing at his jokes and hitting his arm slightly

what you didn’t notice however was seungmin on your left side, his teeth seething into his bottom lip. he witnesses it all, from the way jooyeon’s smile seems to grow wider than before when he notices your laughing, to the way jooyeon fucking peeks over you everytime you hit his arm. pissed would be an understatement, seungmin was livid.

the warm palm on your thigh from seungmin takes your attention away from jooyeon, and seungmin couldn’t hide it anymore. he sternly says that you two needed to excuse yourselves for the rest of the night, which leads to him practically dragging you by your wrist out the door. you don’t even get to properly bid his friends goodbye, his grip on your wrist loosens when you get into the car.

“seungmin, are you okay?” you tilt your head. at first he ignores you, one hand on the wheel and the other on the gear shift, his fingers mindlessly drumming onto it as his speed slowly increases during the drive. “seung-“

“you really don’t have a fucking clue do you?” he says curtly. it makes you scoff loudly which draws his attention towards you at a red light.

“excuse me? what the fuck did i do?”

“we can talk about it when we get home.” he says, trying to calm down. he wants to focus on the rode to get you two home safely, but you weren’t having it. there was no reason for him to burst out at you like that.

“why is it that almost every time we hang out with your friends it’s a problem?” your voice raises, fists clenching out of anger. “you don’t trust me enough do you?”

you see seungmin grip the wheel harder with both of his hands, trying to drown out what ever you have to say.

“you’re such an insecure, selfish asshole! your sour attitude is the reason why your friends have more personality than you!” you threw a few curses at him, which makes him pull over on the side of a dark road, unsure of how far you’re away from your shared home. he unbuckles his seatbelt and sits on his knees in his seat, slightly towering over you. you lean to the side of your door, automatic regret hitting in the pit of your stomach.

“so tell me, why didn’t you get with my friends first? you like them better than me?” he asks, voice just above whisper. he inches close to your face, the fear in your eyes making his blood rush beneath his pants.

“seungmin, i didn’t mean-”

“they’ll treat you better than me right?” your eyes trail off to the window, his hand on your chin turning your head so you could face him.

“would they touch you better than me? hm?”

your words are caught in your throat, your mouth slightly open, but words don’t leave. he waits for an answer, and you know he won’t repeat himself until you respond. he could wait minutes, hours, days in this same spot until you give him a valid answer. you shake your head, loudly gulping. you shake your head from side to side, trying to get home as soon as possible.

the situation you’re in right now could’ve been avoided in various ways.

had you noticed seungmin’s attitude at the dinner table you still would’ve been sitting there. had you given seungmin a better response you could’ve been at home by now. had you noticed jooyeon has fucking liked you for the past few weeks you wouldn’t have been near him.

however, moments after you shook your head, seungmin had you in the backseat of his car, him laying down on his back and you right above him. his long legs were bent upwards for space, your head just barely meeting them every time you bobbed your head downwards on his cock.

you’re trying to be quiet and keep it on the low in hopes of not being caught, but seungmin’s long, slim fingers bury themselves deep inside of your core, the squelch embarrassingly loud each time he pulls out and slams them back in. you can only be pushed to a certain extent though, shamelessly whimpering around his length when the tip of his fingers brush just over your g spot.

“awww, this selfish, insecure asshole making you feel good, babe?” he says behind you, chuckling deeply. you hum over his cock, tears stinging the corners of your eyes when he speeds up, making you drip onto his dress shirt he wore for the night. seungmin figures you’re stretched out enough pulling his fingers out and sliding from underneath you so your mouth is removed from him.

“on your back.” he says and you’re shuffling to get into position. he kneels between your legs, taking his soaked hand and shoving it into your mouth, leaving you no choice but to suck on his fingers. he watches you, smiling in amusement, his other hand guiding his cock to your hole. your legs open up on instinct, seungmin running his length between your lower lips.

“y’know, you really pissed me off tonight. why don’t you moan jooyeon’s name since he has more personality than me?”

“seungmin, please…” your speech is slightly incoherent from his fingers, but the smirk on his face lets you know he’s not fucking around. it makes you look off to the side.

“i won’t put it in unless you do it. cmon baby, you know how to follow rules.”

you huff, your bottom lip being bitten by your teeth, grinding your hips to meet his. he removes his fingers from your mouth, roughly grabbing your hips to keep them down, making you whine. his grip on your hip is firm, being unable to move under it when you try again, it makes you huff out of frustration, sighing when you finally realize you’ve been defeated.

“j-jooyeon, please,” your voice comes out strained as you close your eyes, it hits seungmins ears like a bell. “please…fuck me.”

seungmin’s chuckle was the last thing you hear before he pushes in slowly.

please remember that this is a pure work of fiction.

#—꩜ seungmin #—꩜ smut #—꩜ requests #—꩜ drabbles #xdh imagines #xdh x reader #xdh smut #xdh hard thoughts #xdh hard hours #xdinary heroes imagines #xdinary heroes x reader #xdinary heroes smut #xdinary heroes hard thoughts #xdinary heroes hard hours #o.de smut #o.de x reader #love mail ୨୧

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haknom · 1 year

Text

bravery at my nightmares — yang jungwon

SYNOPSIS > after being expelled from his old school for something he didn’t do, life for jungwon only got harder. everyone avoided him and claimed that he was “bad energy” or a “terrible influence.” so, why did you have to be different than everyone else and actually try to get close to him while gnoring all the rumors about him?

PAIRING > junior!jungwon x junior-fem!reader (ft. enhypen hyung line + jungwon and ni-ki, hoshi from svt, nagyung from fromis_9, and taeil from nct).

WARNINGS > EVERYTHING IS FICTIONAL (severe?) bullying, blood, swearing, toxicity, fighting, the staff force jungwon to open his backpack, a teacher almost hits jungwon, the school staff are really rude, angst, fluff, and mentions of cigarettes.

WORDCOUNT > 4331 words

NOTE > *PLEASE READ* this is my apology letter for not posting mpays!! (although all of y’all may block me IM SORRY IT WASNT SUPPOSED TO BE LIKE THISSS) but anywayss justice for jungwon For Real. PLAYLIST! also special thanks to the “#freejungwon” gc!! @hanniluvi @ddenoudepression @feeeli @soov and ahlam for helping me with ideas and giving feedback 🤞 // js wanna say… THIS HAS TO BE MY FAVE FIC SO FAR BC WHY WAS IT SM FUN TO WRITEE / ALSO, THIS IS ONLY PART ONE OF THE FIC, therefore part 2 (act 1), part 3 (act2), and part 4 (act 3) will be out afterwards!

TEASER / PART 1 / PART 2 / PART 3

ACT 01.

School sucked. At least, that’s what Jungwon thought. It was a terrible place. If he had the choice to stay at home or go to school, he’d stay at home any day.

He never felt welcomed or as though he belonged at Decelis. Even if he was walking near a group of students, you could easily spot him. They were in friend groups, and he wasn’t. He was alone most of the time but he enjoyed it. There was nobody to bother him or tell him what to do, aside from a certain group of boys.

Lee Heeseung, Park Jongseong, Sim Jaeyun, and Park Sunghoon. Everyone feared them, including Jungwon. But his feelings towards them were quite different. He hated them with everything in him. They were the reason Jungwon hated school.

They found entertainment in picking on him whatever chance they got. It was bothersome and annoying. Even if he tried standing up for himself or dodging their attacks when he was pulled into one of their hangout spots — or in other words, a dark alleyway — the consequences were always worse than the first; more bruises and wounds that he’d have to cover up, so it wasn’t obvious something was going on. Their hits were always stronger than the ones from before.

To summarize everything, Jungwon hated life. He couldn’t fend for himself even if he tried and he couldn’t even ask for help without the boys finding out some way.

The surrounding laughter brought him out of his thoughts as the stench of spoiled milk filled his nostrils. The tall figures in front of him overshadowed him as he watched the grins on the four boys’ faces grow. Park Jongseong’s arm extended above Jungwon’s head as he poured a carton of spoiled milk all over him.

The milk was liquid and lumpy as it fell onto his hair and clothes. “Sweet, who would’ve thought that the Lee Heeseung would have a carton of spoiled milk lying in his locker,” Jaeyun said as he elbowed Heeseung softly from beside him with a mischievous smile. “What can I say, I guess it was perfect timing.” He responded with a slight smirk.

Jungwon flinched at the feeling of a lump of spoiled milk dropping on his head and sliding down to his shoulder as he held back tears of humiliation. Jongseong retracted his hand from above Jungwon, scoffing at the sight of him. “Gross,” he muttered with an eye roll while covering his nose. “Let’s go,” Jongseong said as the four of them turned away from Jungwon, heading towards the exit. “Wait, pass me that,” Sunghoon said while pointing at the empty carton in Jongseong’s hand.

He handed him the empty milk carton as Sunghoon threw it behind them, hitting Jungwon right on the chest. The flashing from the phones in the cafeteria increased as well as the laughter. All Jungwon wanted was to eat his lunch peacefully. It was his favorite meal of the day and he was excited to eat it. But now, that didn’t seem like an option anymore, did it?

—

He put his uniform into the washer numerous times, yet the stench wouldn’t leave. No matter how many times he washed his hair, the stench didn’t leave. It pissed him off, a lot.

Of course, he didn’t deserve this, nobody did. Yet, why did it have to be him? Was he the easiest target? Did he have to change so that they wouldn’t mess with him anymore?

All those thoughts made him even more frustrated. The grip he had against his scalp and hair follicles made him groan in pain as he untangled his fingers from his hair. He let out a sigh before he continued to wash his hair for the ninth time, but this time, more gently.

Maybe changing who he was now would help put a stop to all the bullying, right? He nodded the voice in his head as he planned out what he’d do tomorrow. It’ll be an easy day. Everything would run smoothly, and if they were to pick on him, he would fight back. It’ll be alright, he thought.

—

Jungwon was drenched in cologne, trying to overlap the stench of spoiled milk. Though, it only worked for a small amount of time. His plan was running smoothly. There was no sight of the four boys, yet. So he took this time to enjoy his day until it got worse. Of course, there were still some whispering and weird looks he got from other students because of yesterday’s incident, but today, he didn’t let that stop him.

Today, February 9th of 2023, will be his day. It was his birthday after all.

“Hey, shithead.” A too-familiar voice spoke from afar. As he said before, today he would stand up for himself. So, ignoring them worked, right? “Did you not hear us?” Heeseung said, increasing in volume. Their footsteps only became louder as they got closer to Jungwon as he increased in speed. Jaeyun scoffed at Jungwon’s so-called bravery as he also increased in speed.

He placed his hand on Jungwon’s shoulder with a strong grip that halted his movements. “Did you not hear Heeseung call your name?” Jaeyun asked as Jungwon gulped.

So, maybe that plan didn’t work.

“Are you sure he was calling me and not someone else?” Jungwon said, looking at Jaeyun with a glare. “Woah, don’t look at me like that. I almost got scared.” He joked, but Jungwon’s glare didn’t lift. “Whatever, who else in this school goes by the name ‘shithead,’ huh?” Jungwon stiffened at Jaeyun’s words. “You could pass as one too, you know? The name really fits you.” Jaeyun’s hand rose from Jungwon’s shoulder as Jungwon let out a sigh of relief that was cut short by Jaeyun’s fist meeting his stomach.

“You think you’re so high and mighty just because it’s your birthday, don’t you?” He said as he watched Jungwon fall to the floor with his arm over his stomach. “Well, my friends and I prepared a great birthday gift for you!” He teased while rubbing his fist from the previous hit.

“Jaeyun, don’t do it here. There are other students.” Sunghoon whispered from beside him as Jaeyun loosened up. “Fine, but when we get to our spot, I get first hit on him.” He said while looking at Jungwon’s coughing figure. Jaeyun let out a laugh while muttering the words ‘pathetic’ with a bitter tone as he and Sunghoon caught up to the boys who walked away.

Perhaps, Jungwon spoke a little too much?

—

Jongseong held up his phone while laughing at the scene in front of him; Jaeyun was releasing all the pent-up anger from earlier onto Jungwon’s fragile figure that laid on the floor. “Jaeyun, let me have a go at him.” Heeseung said as Jaeyun backed up to catch his breath.

Currently, Jungwon was bleeding almost everywhere. He must’ve made Jaeyun really mad earlier for him to have blood dripping from his mouth, nose, and any available limb possible. There was a throbbing feeling in his head that didn’t feel like it’d lift soon.

“Listen, I won’t go as hard as Jaeyun went. We still need you alive for what we have to say next, okay?” Heeseung said with a comforting smile that immediately faded as he got closer to Jungwon. He tried sitting up with all the strength he had left.

He couldn’t give up now. What about his plan from yesterday?

He raised himself with his arms as Heeseung watched him in annoyance. “Stay down,” he said while kicking his figure, causing him to fall back down to his previous state. “Who said you could get up?” Heeseung crouched down in front of Jungwon, placing his hand on his head. “You know, I don’t really like how you’ve been acting lately. Whether something happened to your confidence or whatnot, I still don’t care. You should at least remember what happens when you go against the rules.” Heeseung said while raising his hand from Jungwon’s head and slapping him across his face.

“Hopefully that fixed you‌. But if not, I’ll give you another one,” he repeated the same process another time, but this time a little harder than before. “Eh, this is quite boring. Turn off the phone,” Heeseung said, waving his hand at Jongseong. “You’re still with us right?” He questioned, waiting for a response from Jungwon but instead, he coughed. It was enough to satisfy Heeseung.

“Sadly, the administrator of our school found out about us breaking Mr. Moon’s car windows the other day and about someone bullying Jihyun.” He explained. “I swear it was her friend Chanyoung who snitched, she’s a bitch for real.” He muttered out of annoyance.

“Although we said it wasn’t us, they won’t believe our words. So, we need you to take the blame. It’s our last year in high school, it’s useless to get expelled now.” He said as Jungwon coughed again. “Why me?” He croaked out as Sunghoon rolled his eyes from the wall he leaned on. “Because we're not scum like you. You’re pathetic, worthless, and useless. Who wants you here anyway?” He said while approaching Heeseung and Jungwon.

“Anyway, you’ll do it right?” Heeseung asked, waiting for Jungwon to nod. Jaeyun kicked Jungwon’s leg, causing it to throb. “He asked you a question, so answer it.” He said in a harsh tone as Jungwon forced out a yes. “Great, be prepared to speak with the administrator and principal tomorrow. Remember, no lying.” Heeseung warned as he rose from his crouching position and stretched his limbs. He dropped the cigarette that was in his other hand and stepped on it, blowing out the blunt.

“I think I’m late for dinner, let’s go.” Heeseung said while leading the group away.

Jungwon’s vision was slightly blurry and his whole body throbbed in pain. He didn’t care about all his scars and fresh wounds. All he wanted was food, he was starving. If it was a regular day at home, he would’ve eaten dinner about an hour ago. No wonder his stomach was growling.

He attempted to stand with the amount of strength he had left. It worked mostly, but he still wobbled on his feet. There should be a nearby convenience store if he wasn’t wrong. Maybe he could get something to fill his belly with the amount of money he had on him.

His feet dragged against the pathways he walked on, holding onto anything nearby for extra support. The store sign that read ‘24HRS’ glowed, illuminating the night sky, and caught Jungwon’s attention as he headed towards it.

The chime from the front door of the convenience store welcomed him and alerted the worker at the front. “Hey, welcome! Tell me if you need any — Woah, what happened to you?!” Her voice exclaimed, but Jungwon ignored her and went to look for a meal.

He picked up a container of Kimbap followed by some extra side dishes. This should be under his budget. He walked over to the cashier with a limp as he felt his limbs becoming sore. “Here,” he mumbled, placing the items on the counter. It only looked like his lips moved with no sound but that was not the case, he had only a little energy in him to speak. It was bad.

The beeping sounds from the item scanner filled the awkward silence between the two as he watched the total count up. “Final price is $6.55, how would you like to pay?” She questioned as he held out the cash needed. “Enjoy your meal,” she said cautiously as he nodded and exited the convenience store to sit on one of the outdoor seats.

The fresh air helped him breathe as he felt his mind clear from the previous incident. He slowly opened his mouth, jaw still sore from the hits the boys landed, and took a bite of his food.

He exhaled out of satisfaction and from the comfort the food gave him and his stomach as he went in for another bite, finishing the Kimbap whole.

The door chimed as the cashier from earlier headed toward Jungwon’s seat. “Hey, you seemed… very injured, are you okay?” She asked, causing Jungwon to turn his head to her walking figure. “I’m fine,” he said, now with more volume. “You don’t look like it,” she sat down on the empty seat on the other side of his table.

“Well, I am. So, I don’t need your help,” he stated with a bitter tone and continued to eat while the cashier placed down items on the table. “Whatever, I’m a high school student, and you look like one too so don’t freak out.” She explained as he looked at her.

“Why are you introducing yourself as if we’ll meet again later? Plus, what if I was some old man who just looked very young?” He said with a raised brow. Did she normally go around giving people her personal information? “I saw your student ID when you were grabbing the cash. I have good peripheral vision.” She explained as he stopped his movements. Well, that was embarrassing.

“But that’s not the point right now, your looks are worrying me, could I treat your wounds? They’re just items from the convenience store, I think it’ll help—”

“I said I’m fine, alright? I don’t need your kindness to feel better or whatever.” He grabbed his food, getting ready to leave. “So, you’re telling me if I were to touch your arm right now, you wouldn't wince in pain?” She argued as he stood there in silence.

“No—Ow!” He exclaimed out of utter shock and pain. “Why did you grip my leg? It could’ve just been a light tap and I would’ve been fine!” He looked down at her as she stared back at him blankly.

“Sit down,” she instructed as he took his seat with a sigh of defeat. She grabbed the ointment from the plastic bag on the table along with a cotton swab. “Where do you want to start?” She questioned while squeezing the ointment onto the end of the cotton swab. “Should I really be trusting a stranger right now?” He asked, unsure of his future choices.

“You literally heard me come out from the store and I couldn’t have poisoned anything. So, you can trust me.” She reassured him as he hesitated but nodded. “Okay, let’s start off easy. How about your hands? There are only a few scratches. I picked up on them after you handed me the items and cash in the store to pay,” she explained as he extended out his arm to her.

“Don’t move,” she warned as she began tapping the ointment around the wound. It wasn’t deep nor was it barely visible. It was in between the two so it must’ve still hurt.

He winced in pain as the ointment spread around the cut. She looked up at him in curiosity. “Did I hurt you?” She questioned in concern as he shook his head in return. “You’re fine, it’s just the air.” He explained as she took that as a sign to continue. As long as she wasn’t making matters worse, everything would be fine.

She put down the two items and grabbed a new one, a bandaid. It was shaped like a square and was pretty small. It should cover up the wound perfectly. She gently placed the bandaid over his wound and ran it over with her thumb while holding his hand in hers delicately. “My hand won’t fall off if you hold it tighter, you know?” He said, judging the light hold she had on his hand. The number of times he had to adjust his hand so far became tiresome so it was best to at least let her be aware of it.

“Well, of course, but I don’t want to lose concentration and accidentally hold on too tight. It happens,” she explained while he nodded. “Reasonable,” Jungwon used his other hand to continue eating as she cleaned up his wounds wherever they were visible. “The ones you can’t see, I can do them on my own. So, don’t worry about those.” He said as she nodded and continued with her job.

Although he had no clue who she was, he felt comforted by her presence and as if he could trust her with what she was doing right now. But, if the two were to meet again there’s no way he’d let this situation be known to everyone. It’s already as bad as it was at Decelis. So, for him to be known as a victim of bullying in other schools wasn’t something he wanted.

“Stay still, okay?” She said while leaning in to clean the wounds on his face. There were moments where he flinched in return or winced in pain, because hey, it really hurt.

“There,” she backed away from his face as her eyes looked over the bandages that covered his wounds. “Better?” She asked as he muttered a ‘sorta’ in return. “Alright, good. I have to close up the store now, so go home, okay? Don’t get into any more fights or whatever it was. Be safe!” She smiled at him as he watched her movements. She rose from her seat and grabbed all the previous necessities, stuffing them into the plastic bag from before.

She waved at him and walked back to the store. Jungwon looked away from her and lowered his head. She was a sweet person but still, he couldn’t trust her. Hopefully, whatever she saw today disappeared from her memories.

—

Jungwon walked into his classroom after his bathroom break and took a seat on his chair. Yesterday sucked, but that didn’t mean today would be any better.

He had some business to deal with and there was a high possibility of him being expelled. Bullying and breaking a teacher’s car? It was bound to happen. They were crazy things. Although he didn’t want to do this, he had no choice.

“Yang Jungwon of class 3, please come to the office immediately.” The voice of the principal was loud through the intercom. All eyes were on him as he grabbed his backpack, preparing to be yelled at in some way or another.

The walk to the office felt dreadful. It was uncomfortable and intense. He hated it. Hopefully, it would be his last time doing it.

He knocked on the door, alerting those on the other side. “Come in," a deep voice said as he turned the knob in response. “Have a seat,” Mr. Soonyoung said.

Looking around the room while taking his seat, Jungwon could see many faces; Mr. Moon, Mr. Soonyoung; the principal, and Mrs. Nagyung; the vice principal.

“Jungwon, I didn’t think you were the type of person to do this.” His voice said with disappointment. “Just because you were a good student or whatnot, that doesn’t mean you’ll get an easy pass.” Mrs. Nagyung said while looking up from her files.

“You know how serious bullying is here, but why did you still do it? The scars and bruises you left on Jihyun’s figure are very visible.” She said as Jungwon stiffened. “Jungwon, answer the question. Why did you do what you did to Jihyun?” Mr. Soonyoung’s voice felt distant to Jungwon. He knew he didn’t do any of this and yet he had no other choice but to tell a lie.

“She’s annoying and she deserved it,” they were basic words but they still caused many issues in the office. “Do you realize how silly you sound? Jungwon, Jihyun did nothing to you. You and I both know that. Why did you still attack her, anyway?” Mr. Soonyoung stated with a stern voice.

“I already said why. Is that not enough for you to understand?” Jungwon tilted his head to the left, mockingly. If he had to lie about what he’s done, he should at least play the part.

Mr. Soonyoung scoffed at his actions. “Psycho,” he muttered under his breath while flipping to the next page. “What about Mr. Moon’s car? Why did you break his windows? Do you not know how expensive it is?” Jungwon looked away from Mr. Soonyoung as he thought of an excuse.

“I was bored, sorry Mr. Moon. I hope you get a new one soon,” he smiled innocently with his dimples showing as Mr. Moon looked at him in confusion and anger. “So?! That doesn’t mean you can go around breaking into someone’s car!” He exclaimed out of anger while grabbing Jungwon’s collar. Jungwon scoffed and looked away, “Clearly, it does mean that if I already did it.” He said while looking back at Mr. Moon.

Anger bubbled inside him. He was ready to hit Jungwon with any chance he got. “Mr. Moon, have a seat.” His voice sounded more like a warning as Mr. Moon released Jungwon’s collar harshly and walked back to the sidelines. “I’m not sure what has gotten into you Jungwon, but I know it’s not you.” Mr. Soonyoung said in a worried tone. “People change, don’t you know that?” Jungwon said.

In his opinion, he was pretty good at this whole facade. That still didn’t mean that he wanted to do this. Lies are something Jungwon never told. He felt dishonest and guilty whenever it happened. It felt like he was breaking a promise he made with someone a while ago.

“Jungwon,” Mrs. Nagyung’s voice pulled him out of his thoughts as he looked at them. Their faces were filled with anger, and it showed how disappointed they were in him. “What about the $100? Jeez, you really are different aren’t you.” Mr. Soonyoung scoffed.

$100? What $100? “What are you talking about?” Jungwon said, genuinely confused. “Can you not lie to us anymore? This is a serious matter, it can even pass as a robbery.” Mrs. Nagyung warned. “I’m serious, what $100?” His thoughts scattered as he tried to figure out what they were talking about.

“The $100 that you stole from the 4 boys.” Mr. Moon asked.

Of course, it was them. What did he expect? But still, they didn’t tell him about this part.

“I didn’t take money from them, what?” His eyebrows furrowed as the three staff in the room had enough of his ‘lying.’ “Open your backpack. If you refuse, you’ll be immediately forced to transfer to a different school.” Mrs. Nagyung said as Mr. Soonyoung wrote something in his notebook.

“Why should I open my backpack? I'm telling the truth, there’s nothing there!” He exclaimed as Mr. Moon reached over to Jungwon’s backpack. Jungwon stood up from his seat, heading over to Mr. Moon. “Jungwon.” Mr. Soonyoung’s voice warned as he stopped in his tracks. Mr. Moon unzipped his backpack and flipped it over as everything fell out, including the wrapped-up $100.

Everyone froze while silence filled the room as a wrapped-up $100 sat on top of his notebooks as they all turned to look at him.

“Jungwon, did you just lie to us?” Mr. Soonyoung questioned.

Everyone knew, he never lied before. But it’s not like that was his current intention. The boys did this, didn't they? They probably snuck it into his backpack when he went to the bathroom.

“I…” He closed his mouth out of shock. He really didn’t know what to say. The sound of Mrs. Nagyung’s pen scribbling on her page was louder than usual. “Yang Jungwon, a student of class 3, is now expelled.” Her words felt like a stab to his heart.

Why was he ever excited about high school again? It sucked ass. Never would he want to experience something like this again.

He reached over to his backpack and packed his things while leaving the band of money behind and walked out of the office. Students that stood in the hallways watched as he walked to his locker, head down.

More students from other classes poked their heads out of their classroom windows out of curiosity.

“Nice! The staff here are so gullible.” Sunghoon said while laughing at Jungwon from the corridor the four boys stood at. “For real, it only took a couple of $100 for them to agree with us.” Jongseong agreed, high-fiving Sunghoon. “I’ll miss teasing that kid, he was such an easy target.” Heeseung sighed, pushing himself off of the wall he leaned on.

“Hey, did you get that on camera?” He asked Jaeyun. “Yeah, don’t worry. He looks hella pathetic.” He laughed as he showed Heeseung the clip. “Sweet,” he snickered as the four boys walked away from the scene. “Send me that when you have the chance,” Heeseung said while pointing at his phone screen. Jaeyun nodded as their voices became mumbles.

Jungwon looked up from the floor only to be met with the faces of many students who had their phones out. They had no clue what was going on but still felt the need to record, it sucked.

It was embarrassing and shameful.

Jungwon lowered his head again and picked up his walking speed to his locker. All he had to do was empty it out and then leave, not that hard. But with all the lights that flashed around him and the chatter and laughter that overfilled his ears, they were all too much for him.

Slowly, tears fell down from his lash line one by one as his shoulders shook slightly. It was embarrassing to cry in public but he couldn’t hold it back anymore. All the pent-up sadness, anger, and emotions he held in for the past three years at Decelis finally released as heavier tears trickled down his cheeks nonstop.

His romanticized high school life was now over. It wasn’t enjoyable nor was it exciting to attend school every day. It was terrifying, uncomfortable, and frustrating. Nevertheless, he dealt with it because he had no other choice but to do so.

And like he said before, life sucked.

TAGLIST: @soov @redm4ri @ox1-lovesick @urszn @feeeli @taejays @hanniluvi @dakkisz @dimplewonie @ddenoudepression @xiaoderrrr @ja4hyvn @mmaplepastries @essmarye @w3bqrl @axartia @yjjungwon @jennaissantes @yenqa @chaechae-23 @annoyingbitch83 @hawkins-hs @shinsou-rii @wanna-live-yn-life @luvhyun3 @astrae4 @naddii @4yjwonnn

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tommiruewrites · 2 years

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hi my love! i was wondering if you could write a shy fem reader dating eddie munson and they go to a party or something and she sees him talking to chrissy (or another girl) and gets jealous? if not don't stress it. i love your writing by the way <3

MINE - E.M.

word count: 2.2k

requested: yes | no

requests: open | closed

request rules here

warnings: fem reader, one implication of reader being short (at least shorter than eddie), small segment where reader has anxiety, jealousy ofc, kissing, mentions of alcohol consumption, mentions of drugs (very brief, no intake), chrissy is not the villain

a/n: jealousy fics are my weak spot omg i had sm fun writing this. it took me a rly long time to get in a flow because i loved the req so much that i wanted to be perfect and i was overcomplicating it for myself so I apologize on the setback for reqs. i do first come first serve, so now that i'm finally happy with this one i can move on to all the other wonderful reqs! i hope you like the way it turned out <3333

remember to like, comment, and reblog to support my writing <3

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You're zoned out, feeling the thumping music throughout your whole body as it shakes the countertop you're sitting on and pulses through you. It tickles a little under your fingertips. One too many drinks in and teetering dangerously on the line of being a little bit more than tipsy, you swing your legs back and forth as you stare blankly at the fridge in front of you, wondering why Steve still has baby alphabet magnets stuck on it. You add it to your memory bank of 'things to make fun of him for later.'

"Helloooo. Is anyone home?"

You see a hand wave in front of your face, blinking back to reality and turning to face your best friend. Robin Buckley. "Lost you for a second there. You okay?" She looks ridiculous, sitting crisscross applesauce with a beer in one hand and a half-eaten block of cheese in the other.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Just starting to get a little tired." You put your drink down, reaching your arms up to stretch. Pulling back to rub at your eyes, you quickly jolt your hand away, remembering you have makeup on. Little do you know that its already a kinda smudged anyway. "Have you seen Eddie?"

The clock read 11:43. You haven't seen him in almost an hour now. You weren't a huge fan of parties, so you didn't go to many, but when you did, you usually you stuck by Eddie's side the whole night. That way you didn't have to socialize with people you didn't already know and risk embarrassing yourself. Last you saw he was headed off with some buff guy to make a deal, and you had expected him to be back by now.

"Nope, not since the last time he was here." Robin replies, leaning back against the marble to look at whatever was on the ceiling that she found so interesting.

Looking around, you notice that Steve's been gone for a while too. They must have wandered off together. "Okay, thanks Rob's." You push off the counter, heading off into the sea of people as Robin calls out a lazy, "Any time!"

There's barely enough room to squeeze your way through the crowd, almost getting knocked over too many times for your liking. You know for a fact that there's no way in hell Eddie's in this crowd dancing, especially not without you, so you don't even bother to look. As you near the door to Steve's backyard, you wonder if he even knows half of these people that are frolicking around in his house.

The chilly autumn air hits your face the moment you open the sliding glass door. You step out onto the concrete steps, squinting through the darkness to see any sign of Eddie. Nothing. Odd, on the rare occasion you attend parties, you can usually find him outside making a deal or smoking or something. As you stand in the cold you can feel your last drink starting to hit you a little harder, mind starting to get a little fuzzy.

You head back into the unpleasant warmth of the crowded living room, shoving your way past a couple that definitely does not shy away from PDA. You jog up the stairs, two steps at a time as you look at the faded carpet beneath your sneakers. You check every room in the hall, but most are empty, and the ones that aren't are thankfully not occupied by your boyfriend. At this point your just extremely confused, tired, and missing your boyfriend's company. You stumble back downstairs, just as Steve passes you, being dragged into the mass of dancing people by Robin.

You grab his arm, causing him to slingshot back in your direction, "Hey, Steve!"

"Yeah, what's up?" You can't smell a single drop of alcohol on his breathe, meanwhile Robin has probably bathed in it by now.

"Have you seen Eddie? I've been looking for him everywhere."

"Uhh, have you checked out back?" Robin was now dancing with Steve's outstretched arm.

"Yeah, he's not there. I checked upstairs too."

Steve looks around a little, trying to pinpoint his friend through the swarm, "Sorry, I haven't seen him." Robin loses interest in dancing and begins pulling him away again, "Let me know if you can't find him, alright?" He shouts, quickly getting swallowed by the crowd.

"Yeah, okay."

Now you were starting to get anxious. What if something bad happened to him? What if Vecna was back? You frantically pushed your way through the room, looking around as every possible awful scenario imaginable passed through your brain. Unfortunately, in your hazy state you couldn't logically decipher what was or wasn't reality. You finally make it through the cluster of partygoers, catching a glimpse of curly dark hair across the room. Your heart swells, relieved that he's safe.

You sigh in relief, quickly hurdling towards him, "Eddie! Thank goodness you're okay, I-" You hear a laugh and feel your feet come to an abrupt stop. It's a girl. It's a pretty girl, and she's laughing at something your boyfriend said.

Taking in the scene unfolding in front of you, you stare at Eddie who's leaning against the wall near the front door, talking with the prettiest girl you've ever seen. You weren't usually the possessive type, but for some reason you felt a little on edge. Maybe it was the alcohol, or maybe it was simply the fact that he was gone for almost an hour and now you find him chatting it up with another girl. The worst part is, you know her, and she's wonderful. The nicest girl you've ever met and she's gorgeous, and popular, and kind, and outgoing, and everything you wish you were. You stand there, frozen, watching as he must have said something funny again because now she's laughing so hard she can barely breathe. Even her laugh is pretty. She tries to steady herself and catch her breath. She grabs his arm. She's holding his arm and laughing at his joke, and he's not pushing her away. You can't help the jealousy that bubbles up in your stomach, making you almost nauseous with envy.

All of a sudden, your feet are moving, pushing you off in the direction of your metalhead boyfriend. You walk up next to him, grabbing his arm a little more harshly than you intended, causing Eddie to jump before softening when he realizes it's you. "Oh hey, baby! Chrissy was just asking about you."

You forcefully pull his arm away from her lingering hand, placing it around your shoulders, "Well, here I am!" You reply dryly, offering a tight-lipped smile in her direction. No matter how jealous you were, you could never hate her. She's an absolute angel. Still, this was the most polite response you could muster up at the moment.

Out of the corner of your eye you could see Eddie's smile flicker to confusion for a moment. Sure, you were shy, but you were still usually very friendly. It especially confused him since he knows you think very highly of Chrissy.

"Have you been having fun?"

"Yeah." You mutter, barely audible.

An uncomfortable silence falls over the three of you as your eyes linger on Chrissy. She awkwardly smiles and sways on her feet. Quickly, Chrissy and her amazing social skills recover the situation, sparking up another vivid conversation with Eddie. Your eyes dart between them, enviously twisting and tugging at Eddie's black Metallica shirt. Soon enough they're laughing again, and then you hear what pushes you right over the edge. She calls him "Eds", in her wispy cute little giggle voice that makes you want to rip your hair right out of your skull. That's what you call him. That's your nickname for him. You've finally had enough, and you just can't handle it any longer or you think you might explode. You put your hand on Eddies chest, pulling at his shirt to get his attention as you lean your face up to look at him. "Hey, Eds?"

He places a hand on top of the one grabbing his shirt, laughing a little as he removes it before you rip a hole in it. "What's up?"

You bite your cheek to keep yourself calm, jealous and also embarrassed of said jealousy, you squeeze his hand. Hard. He pulls you closer to his side and leans down to hear you better in the loud atmosphere.

"I think I'm ready to go home now." You say just loud enough for Eddie and Chrissy to hear, envy bubbling out into the sharpness of your words as you say it through clenched teeth.

He takes a minute to process it. Process your tone... and then all of a sudden it clicks.

"Ah, okay." He whispers as he rubs your back, turning to face Chrissy. "We're gonna head out."

She smiles at the both of you, almost disappointed, "Aw, alright. See you guys around!"

"Have fun!" He smiles, turning to walk through the front door, waving to a disheveled Steve and Robin as you cling to his side, practically pulling him out of the party. Once you both get in the car, he starts the engine and pulls out onto the road. The drive is mostly silent besides the sound of the tires against the rough concrete and the engine whirring. You chew on your lip and slouch into your seat, incredibly ashamed of your own emotions and the fact that you still can't shake them. Eddie rests his hand on your thigh, trying to sooth you. You look out of your window to avoid having to talk to him right now. You can tell that Eddie knows you're a little drunk. You secretly hope that's all he chalks your shifty mood up to. Alcohol.

You pull up to a gravelly stop in front of your trailer. You live in the trailer directly next to Eddie's, but you spend so much time at his place that it almost felt like you lived there instead. You hop out of the car and immediately head for your trailer, "Goodnight, Eddie!" You rush out, practically bolting for your door.

"Ah ah ah, not so fast short stuff." He crowed from behind you, leaning his back against the hood of his car and crossing him arms almost mockingly. He wore a knowing smirk on his face, and you couldn't help but shrink into yourself as you slowly turned around. "What was that all about, hm?"

You shrugged your shoulders, legs slightly swaying beneath you, "What was what?"

"Aw come on, don't play dumb with me sweetheart." He pushes off the car, slowly walking towards you with a strangely proud smile. "Come on, say it."

"Say what?"

"Why you wanted to get me out of there oh so badly?"

You rock on the balls of your feet, toying with your sweater sleeve nervously, "I'm drunk."

He shakes his head disapprovingly, pretending to think as his curls framing his face wildly, "Mm, but you're sober enough to be having this conversation?"

Heat blossoms across your face, forcing you to look down to hide it.

Eddie's demeanor softens slightly, taking a few steps closer and wrapping his arms around your waist. "Let me guess. Were you..." he starts, getting softer as he leans down to your ear, "a little jealous?"

You whine and hide your face in his shoulder, hitting his chest when he starts to laugh. "Eddie, cut it out! It's not my fault okay!" you start to ramble, "I had a lot to drink, and she's so perfect, and she thought you were funny, and she was touching you, and- and..."

Eddie tugs at your sweater as you trail off, softly urging you to finish, "and what, sweetheart?"

"She called you 'Eds'... Only I'm supposed to get to call you that." You mumble out as quietly as possible. Your face burns hot as you bury your head further into his neck. You feel absolutely mortified.

"A little possessive, are we?" His smirk was evident in his tone.

Your fingers tighten at the hem of his t-shirt, pulling yourself impossibly closer to him before muttering something almost inaudible.

Eddie can't wipe the smile off of his face, suddenly deaf "Sorry, what was that?"

"I said... you're, mine."

A moment passes, making you wish the ground would open up and swallow you whole... and then you feel Eddie's laughter rumble against his chest until he's leaving sweet little kisses on every inch of your face in between rambled sentences.

"You look so cute when you're jealous, you know that?"

He kisses up your neck, "All pouty and flustered over nothing."

Up your jawline, "Christ princess, I can't believe you think you're the lucky one here-"

Across your cheekbone, "Sure, Chrissy's nice, but she doesn't hold a candle to you, honey."

Then finally, he looks at you, holding your gaze while he speaks, "I've only got eyes for you, babe." His lips graze against yours, smiling into the kiss as he softly presses into you and pours every ounce of adoration into it. You finally feel your jealousy melting away, intertwining your fingers with his. He pulls back ever so slightly to mutter one final promise against your lips;

"I'm all yours."

302 notes · View notes

bryceslahela · 2 years

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I mean yah pb honestly botches it when it comes to having LIs be race customizable. you can’t tell me Liam wouldn’t have a different experience if he was black or Asian with a white brother and father vs white Liam. And MTFL having a storyline about police and gun violence etc etc reads SO differently depending on the races of mason and the other guy whose name I’m forgetting (Noah??? Idk). I’m all for being able to pick your LI but there are so many times it is so clearly white coded that having a customizable LI be a different race doesn’t make sense to the story

exactly!!! like race shapes how people view others and the way people are treated by others. a black tyler being ostracised by his (mostly white??) team vs white tyler being excluded will have totally diff experiences. this counts for sm books, even the mcs experiences. like with the running theme of the cops not rlly caring abt woc will hit harder when ur perdita is a woc. which is why when ur tackling difficult topics like racism u shouldn’t have race customisable characters.

#does this make sense???#jade answers

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toburnup · 2 years

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it’s the sleep deprived anon again!! (The one who binge read all four parts of throw me one) I didn’t take a nap, but the good news is that I can crash early because of it lol. Listened to the song and I loved it!!! The throw me one vibes are so strong, it’s insane- I def see why it’s the pinnacle. I’m gonna leave some songs that came on while I was reading it cuz I feel like they fit the vibes so well (hope this isn’t weird lol) but it’s only love by tigercub (this song literally came on during the kiss scene it was like I was watching a movie, very cinematic lmao) Pretend by BadSuns and Hit Reset by A Great Big Pile of Leaves :)

Literally so excited for part five btw!! (And the proper convo hahah) Also 100% gonna ride my bike again and listen to New Romance and smashing pumpkins because they were my designated biking band when I was still in the habit hahah.

And yes, definitely two (sad) peas, I relate to the trying to be enough for people sm. I’ve also recently come to realize that I’m 100% a people pleaser and their opinions of me matter more than they really should- I’m working on it lmao. But I feel like Steve is somewhat of one too? Not only in the show but lowkey your fic? Or maybe I’m deflecting too much 😎

But, I think a lot of good writing comes from ones own experiences and life. You can definitely tell you put a lot of time and energy into your story and characterization. So I really appreciate it, it can be quite therapeutic in a way to write characters with similar traits as you. So keep up the awesome work!! <3

hello my sleep deprived anon!! 🥰 thank you so much for sending this alsflksdjflskdf i'm glad you enjoyed the song.

i totally see what you mean by the songs you mentioned, omg. especially that first one 'cause damn that's a first kiss song!! (it's only love) - i'm adding these to my playlist even tho i'm done writing 💙

yes, steve is definitely a people pleaser! i mean it may have different reasons behind it than your own - steve, in this fic, has fairly low self esteem and it's a lot harder for him to define and assert boundaries when he's partly measuring worth from others approval and perceived love for him (COUGHmeCOUGH) - but i think the results would be similar!!

i'm basing a lot of this off stuff i went through from 18-22ish, lmao. it's super cathartic to write and makes me have more compassion for my younger self 💜😌 my younger, idiotic (said lovingly) self.

#sleep deprived anon #i really appreciate ppl sending me songs!!#my fics #vio answers

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duskamethyst · 3 years

Note

I honestly love your writings! I've read all of your jjk fics and its soooooooo goood! Is it okay if I request a Naoya Zenin x Reader x Toji Fushiguro threesome (degradation kink and creampie pls make it pure filth if you'd like) 👀 Reader is a servant of the Zenin household and you know whats next 👌

thank you sm! i hope you’ll like this one too :)

warnings: degradation kink, creampie, threesome, spit roasting

“you think you can come in here and get to fuck one of my sluts?” naoya tuts.

“if i knew, i would’ve never left.” toji replies in a sneer as he brushes a strand of hair away from your face to see you struggle fitting his cock inside your mouth.

“that’s why you’re only– fuck– getting her mouth.”

“you’re having a hard time taking me, sweetheart? says a lot about how you’ve never taken a big dick before.” toji ignores him, who’s pounding into you unforgivingly from the back.

you look up at him through your lashes, eyes teary and glossy while your cunt drools an ample amount of slick for naoya.

“mmh–” you whine as your tongue glides against the prominent vein on his dick.

“don’t you fucking answer him, you dirty slut.” naoya ruts into you harder, jolting you forward and causing you to take more of toji’s cock into your mouth.

“don’t you wanna show me how good naoya has taught you? unless this is a new challenge for you.” toji deliberately taunts further.

thanks to naoya’s egotism, pushing his buttons is effortless. toji can almost see the slight twitch in his eye when he hears that.

“show him. show how well you can take a cock.”

and he almost laughed when naoya took the bait.

you try to relax your jaw in order to accommodate more of his thick girth, taking him deeper until nothing but a string of expletives tumble free from his lips.

“shit– that’s it.” his head is thrown back as he groans, eyes closed once engulfed by the warmth of your mouth.

you squeeze him by hollowing your cheeks and bob your head as you begin to suck him dry. toji looks at you with half-lidded eyes, watching how your lips wrapped prettily around him, almost like it’s where it’s meant to be.

on the other hand, naoya is welled up with pride as if he has proved a point to the other male. in his arrogance, he still needs to remind toji who you actually belong to; the only one who can actually use you whenever and however he likes.

“tell that fucker who the fuck owns you.” his hand maneuvers under your body, reaching to pinch your clit and making you gasp and draw away from toji.

“m-master naoya!” you keen, body trembling as he flicks your clit with his fingers.

a conceited smirk curls on his lips as he hears the way he’s addressed; an indication of his superiority. “yeah? and who are you gonna cum for?”

“f-for you–” you moan as you buck your hips to meet his ferocious thrusts. obscene squelches evoke from your sopping cunt, tight walls sucking him in greedily.

“i can’t take this anymore.” toji tugs the back of your head to shove his cock back into your mouth. he begins snapping his hips forward, the tip hitting the back of your throat and making you gag while you squeeze naoya’s cock.

“i knew you liked choking on dicks. i can feel you clamping down on me.” naoya grunts, landing a harsh blow on one cheek.

vibrations from your unsuppressed moans drives toji mad and his pace becomes more unrelenting as he fucks your face. tears prickle on the corner of your eyes and drool start to dribble from your lips down to your chin.

as toji’s grip on your head grows more loose, you pull away from him. toji looks at you in silent curiosity before his eyes widen in fascination when you tilt your head to suck his balls while your hand wraps around his cock to rub on the flushed tip with your thumb.

“oh, that’s the shit right there.” a guttural sound leaves his throat as he grinds against your fist.

the fact that you submissively and pathetically carter yourself to a man arouses naoya even more, causing his cock to become impossibly harder.

“if only you could see yourself right now.. come on, tell me what you are.” he smacks your ass harshly, his balls slapping against your pussy.

“ah– i’m– i’m a slut.” you whimper, the stinging sensation has your grip on toji’s cock to be firmer.

“louder.” he spanks the same cheek again and your skin grows warmer from the cruel attention.

“a slut!” you cry louder.

toji laughs, tapping your swollen lips with his tip. “whores like you would take anyone’s cock, huh? you like dicks that much?”

the demeaning remark shouldn’t make you feel hotter, but it does– especially having two gorgeous men fighting over you and filling you up. you can feel the prominent vein brushing against your walls in every drag from naoya and you can taste the salty precum leaking on your tongue from toji, both waking a familiar feeling in your guts and clouding your head with pleasure.

“please let me have your cum.” you breathe before gently milking the tip and running your tongue on the slit with swift strokes.

you can hear a faint tsk coming from behind you, displaying his repulsion as he ruts into your pulsing cunt.

“i’m gonna cum all over your pretty face.” he grunts, sensing his climax approaching as you remain to focus on the sensitive tip.

with a pop sound, he pulls out from your mouth and pumps his cock in his fist as you draw out your tongue and let him splurt ropes of cum on your face; landing on your nose, cheeks and tongue.

“that’s it, lick it clean.” he grins, panting heavily as you offer kitten licks.

a whine escapes your mouth when you feel naoya toying with your clit, drawing your attention away from the other.

“so you wanna be everyone’s cum dump? ‘cause i’ll throw you away to every single man in here.” he spits with venom in his voice. “and let them take turns ravaging your whore cunt.”

“n-no– don’t–” you moan feebly with no strength in your words, mind frenzied with every exquisite drag of his throbbing cock against your walls along with the taste of toji’s cum inundating your senses.

naoya tugs you by the scalp, jerking your head back. “then, cum. cum on my cock and i’ll think about it.”

with another roll by his fingers, your body tenses and you gush around him with a shameless moan. all thoughts erode from your mind, even the pair of eyes that is attentively watching you fall apart. naoya’s cock twitches as he feels you cream all over him and he knows he’s close.

his pace turns sporadic and he growls as he cums, hips stuttering out of control as he empties out inside you. it feels like he wouldn’t stop going until he finally releases you and pulls out his spent cock. you let out a whimper when he spreads your folds with his fingers and he grins at the sight of your quivering pussy oozing out his thick cum, slowly dripping onto the mattress.

“now, show this to that old geezer.”

#naoya zenin #zenin naoya #toji fushiguro #fushiguro toji #toji smut #naoya smut #jjk smut #naoya x reader #naoya x you #toji x reader #toji x you #jjk x reader #jujutsu kaisen smut #r; writes. 🔮#r; for jjk. ✍️

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stupidretroluv · 2 years

Text

Private Property

(here is the song i was inspired from )

Fem reader x individual bts members

Warning: 18+ (Degration, recording, food play, fingering, vaginal sex,) lmk if i missed anything !!

a/n: hi its me, okay so this is my first time writing smut so dont hate me, and yeah thank you sm for reading this stuff :) I also take requests and yeah <3

Namjoon:

I'll go whenever you press play

Pause whenever you want babe

Do whatever you want babe

I'll sing whatever you want babe

Make love whenever you want to

Do whatever we gone do

No ones here but us two

Me and you

Namjoon had you pressed against the bathroom,¨Why do you make me like this y/n¨He groaned in your ear, shivers running up and down your spine. His attack continued on your neck, harshly kissing it eager to take you all in,¨Why couldn't we wait until we got home? Instead were in Tae´s bathroom¨ He continued

His hand trailed down your pants, feeling you,¨Please Joon¨ You moaned, throwing your head back when his thumb began to rub your clit. Your hand Instinctly went to his, trying to relieve some pleasure from your sensitive clit but instead he took your small hands with his big one and pinned them against the wall. You let out small whimpers trying not to alert anyone outside.

One of his hands rubbed circles around your clit, another hand on the wall holding your hands and his mouth on your neck trailing to your ear,¨It's just you and me y/n, no one else¨He whispered in your ear, your eyes rolling back from all the pleasure,¨Just like that baby¨ He smirked, seeing you dissolve with just his fingers, your puppy eyes doing things to him,¨I got you¨

Yoongi:

'Cause she hops on top with no top

Riding the drop

Meaning she drive stick and she gives good

Now I don't know if that ring finger gon get a rock

But I tear that thang up and call the doc real talk

Yoongi's hands were on your breasts while your hips smacked down on his. His cock buried deeply in your cunt. Your moans and his pants filling the car,¨You feel so good¨ Yoongi moaned out, his fingers pulling your nipples slightly, this sudden pleasure made your hips slow down the rhythm,¨Continue¨ Yoongi chuckled, lightly slapping your ass.

You shook your head,¨I can't, it feels too good¨ You whimpered

Suddenly Yoongi wrapped his hands around your waist tightly gripping it, he brought his legs up and planted them on the couch seat, the new position making his cock reach a new place that had you shiver, Yoongi looked up at you and smiled, you were about to smile when he suddenly thirst his hips up at a rapid past making you scream,¨Oh god¨

Your hands went to reach his shoulder while he fucked you hard and fast,¨Thats my girl¨ He smriked at the way you disolved on his cock, your mind going fuzzy from the pleasure.

Hobi:

Mm don't stop until you finish

So bad feels like I'm sinning

So God please forgive me

For what I'm 'bout to do

Treat me like your object

Please baby don't stop it

You say no, I say yes

The best I ever had

Hobi´s hand went to reach for your neck, his cock drilling your cunt at a fast pace. Your legs were wrapped around his waist while your hands gripped the bed sheets,``Your my slut¨Hobi groaned out, biting your earlobe lightly. You were too into the feeling of his cock inside your wet cunt you didn't answer until a smack to your thigh brought you back,¨Answer¨ He grunted, his grip going a little tight.

You nodded desperately,¨Yes I´m yours¨ He smiled at your answer, his hips slapping against yours,¨Harder please¨

Hobi furrowed his brows,¨No-¨

¨Please I need it¨ You whimpered desperately.

Hobi sat up on his knees to have more control of his movements and pulled you closer to him. The back of your thighs hitting the front of his, you insticly wrapped your legs around you as he began to rock his hips even faster,¨You like that right?¨ He laughed at your reaction, the new position hitting a new area,his hand went back to your neck gripping a little tighter,¨Mine¨ He groaned, smacking his hips against you.

Jin:

And I've been waiting for my minute girl

I'm going straight to dessert no dinner girl

And in the couple hours I ain't even finish girl

And Imma keep the property as long as you let me hit it girl

Bet they don't know that you a sinner girl

You couldn't see anything or move your hands, you had to trust your boyfriend who decided to tie you up and blindfold you. You felt the bed sink slightly indicating your boyfriend was back. He seemed to be shaking something,¨Bring your legs up baby¨ He instructed.

You listened, opening your legs for him, he moved in between your legs. His lips hovering over your inner thighs, your breathing getting heavier. That's when you felt something slightly cold meeting your wet cunt, the can of the substance made it slip down to onto the sheets, once your nose had a whiff you realized it was whipped cream, Jin´s puffy lips going to attack your clit slurping up the whipped cream,¨Oh my god¨ You moaned out

Jin's tongue slid between your sweet folds, up to your clit sucking on the nub,¨You taste so good baby. He moaned into you, you cried out in pleasure as his tongue continued to clean you up. He added two fingers to your cunt while his lips sucked your clit harder,¨My favorite dessert¨ He whispered.

Jimin:

Keep my property private

Between me and you, they ain't gotta know what we do

Keep my property private

Don't want them all up in my business, affecting my business

Keep my property private

¨I need you now Jimin¨ You shutted the door to his hotel room.

Next thing you knew you were pressed up against a wall while Jimin slid down to his knees for you,¨Imagine if your fans knew how dirty you were y/n¨He smirked up at you. Your hand went to your breast, throwing your head back at his dirty words,¨Look at me when I'm talking to you¨ He slapped your cunt, your clit vibrating in pleasure.

¨No Jimin, please do something¨ You cried out

He nodded,¨Of course my dirty girl¨ He grabbed your leg and brought it up to his shoulder, your cunt directly on his face now, he lightly blew air on your clit. You bit your lip hard,¨Don't be shy¨ He teased. His tongue diving into your folds, your hands went down to his hair, slightly pulling on it.

The tugging turned him on, he began to moan into your cunt, adding vibrations to everything, the pleasure becoming overwhelming,¨You can do it baby¨ He smiled when he heard all your whimpering.

Tae:

Your heart driving me safe, wanna feel safe

But keep my property private

Gotta maintain that squeaky clean image

While I'm riding around and I'm getting it

You were sitting on the´slap, your body facing the camera in front of you. Tae began to move your hair to the side to have more access when kissing your neck,üWhat if everyone knew your dirty secret y/n?¨ He asked, his mouth sucking your sensitive part of your neck, you let out quiet moans,¨that the perfect goody two shoes is in here with me?¨

His hand began to travel under your shirt and gripped your bra,¨Tae¨ You moaned, throwing your head back on his shoulder, giving him more access to do anything he wanted to you.

He smirked as he continued his attack on your neck,¨Don't worry baby, it's just you and me¨ His hand pulling your bra up to have more access to your breast, his fingers rolling your nipple. You began to moan.

Tae continued this teasing for a bit longer and you began to grow unpaicent,¨Tae please just fuck me¨ You gasped out

He chuckled,¨Of course baby¨

Jungkook:

The boy got so much dirt on me

I swear if he was the sex police

They could lock a bitch up for the century

This boy got so much dirt on me

I swear if he told a soul, where could I go?

¨Are you serious?¨ You rolled your eyes when you saw Jungkook, you went to turn around but he pulled you to a lonely corner of the party,¨Let me go!¨ You raised your voice but in reality you wanted him to fuck you hard.

Jungkook gripped your wrist with his hand and pinned them above your head, his knee forcing itself between your legs,¨Why haven't you called?¨ He asked, his lips hovering over your ear

¨I've been busy¨ You lied

He began to raise his knee a bit to your wet cunt,¨I know you need me y/n¨ He whispered in your ear,¨or did you forget everything we've done?¨ He asked

His cold hand went down your pants to rub circles on your clit, your mind losing itself,¨Kook… please¨ You whimpered, and a little afraid of being caught.

His body pressed against you, hiding a bit of what was going on, the closeness making his hand go harder on your clit, you threw your head back in pleasure,¨I've missed you¨ He threw puppy eyes down at you, those eyes making you melt,¨I need you¨ His fingers slipping in you as his thumb continued to rub fast circles on your clit.

¨God i've missed you too¨ You moaned out in pleasure, not caring about anything anymore.

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yesimwriting · 3 years

Note

Would you write a Kaz Brekker request where the reader is a bookworm and a crow and basically Kaz asks the reader to read to him as his way of apologizing after a argument that was his fault?

it a/n i did something kinda similar in a 'promise of rain' blurb,, but this concept is so cute to me:)) love it sm i moved it up my request cue lol

also IM IN COLLEGE NOW!! WHAT?? AND IVE BEEN TO A PARTY! AND IM JOINING A SORORITY AND I DID DRAMA AUDITIONS AND AHH !! SO DIFFERENT! I MISS MY MOM AND SISTER AND DOG AND EVEN MY DAD BUT IM HAPPY HERE!!

also im a little worried this might not portray kaz superrrrr accurately bc it's been awhile so just let me know,, feedback leads to improvement:)) also kinda set this up for a part 2 bc...well youll see

They've always said a lot of things about him, and I've always heard them. But I've never quite believed them. Sure, I get why the dark things that have flourished in the poisoned soil that is Ketterdam consider Kaz Brekker the darkest thing of all. I understand the nickname 'Dirtyhands' for the gloved criminal who has fooled each crime boss at least once. I understand each terrible thing they've said about him.

But I've never agreed with them. I've never even considered agreeing with them. Until today.

The thought that maybe everything people say about him is correct in a simple context struck me worse than the silence after our argument. It made me feel like both a fool and hypocrite. Kaz and I have had our fair share of spats over the relatively short time we've known each other, but never like this. Never so badly he stormed out of the room before I could. I squeeze the book in my lap even harder, desperate to focus on the words on the pages.

You didn't hurt him. He walked away because he decided you weren't worth the cost of his expensive time. I repeat those thoughts in my mind over and over again, letting them bitter me further. It's a lot easier to be mad than hurt. A lot easier to fuel your pain than try to understand your mistakes. Besides, tiredness is already dredging around in my chest and if I don't calm down a little I won't be able to fall asleep.

I had escalated the fight more than I should have. Knowing Kaz is like performing in a tightrope act. One must always be aware of where they're going. Watching what's in front of them without ever thinking too much about what's beneath or behind them. Today though, when I needed my balance most I chose to fall. I chose to dive, and apparently there was no net.

"Oh, you're doing that thing."

I roll my eyes at Jesper's voice as I fight down a yawn. I wipe my face with the back of my palm before turning. The burning behind my eyes never resulted in full tears, but I feel better after doing so. "What thing?"

"That terribly noble thing where you find it in yourself to take full blame for every single conflict you and boss man fall into." The slight humor in his voice is enough for me to roll my eyes again. "Between you and me, I'm sure the reason he's so angry now is because you didn't do that for once."

I press my lips together as my chin angles itself upwards slightly. "I never do that." He raises an eyebrow. The slight sympathy that colors the look is more offensive than his accusation. "If I pick and choose my battles, it's for good reason."

"Clearly."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

He shrugs once before further entering my room. I say nothing when he sits at the foot of my bed. "Oh, you know," Jesper stretches back casually, resting his back against the wall and extending his legs, "You and Kaz--Kaz and you."

Has he been drinking? Perhaps he's not here because of my unusual absence from downstairs after my fight with Kaz but because he's already too tipsy to think right. "What?"

At my confused look he grins, flashing all of his teeth with an arrogance that outshines the whiteness of them. He taps the still open book in my lap. "Let me put it in terms you'll understand." Jesper sits up a little further, amusement clear in his features. "You two make a shameful Elizabeth and Darcy--"

"Oh, shut up," I groan, glaring at him, "This isn't Pride and Prejudice. And Kaz and I," Jesper's smugness returns when I can't quite think of what I want to say, "We're barely friends--we're barely anything, let alone what you're implying."

Jesper pulls his legs up and shoves me gently. "Dearest, y/n," he ignores my glare, "You should know better than anyone that 'barely friends, barely anything' with Kaz is more than it is with anyone else?"

"That doesn't mea--"

"You two say goodnight to each other." Once. Kaz and I said good night to each other in front of Jesper once. How dare he assume it happens regularly? He's right, but that doesn't mean I'm okay with it. "You play cards with him. Not for money, not for skill--"

"It's for practice." The look Jesper gives me is enough to tell me that my defense didn't land.

Damn him for ever finding Kaz and I on one of those strange nights. One of those nights in which he lurks at the stairwell...the one that divides my room and his attic. One of those nights in which it feels like he's a phantom and I'm the only one that can really see him. A night in which we both silently find each other.

I couldn't quite believe it the first time it happened. I'm not exactly a Crow--I don't feel enough a connection to the Dregs to join them without some kind of guarantee--but I was needed for some obscure job. but I was needed for some obscure job. The Crows needed an insider who could blend into high society, and I needed a place to stay away from my father.

It worked. I worked. And with each passing day I found myself enjoying the Crows more and more. That's why I stayed. That's why I started checking the stairwell practically every night, a set of playing cards in my hand.

The first time had been awkward. I couldn't sleep and my room felt too quiet, but the rambunctious club felt too loud and a little unsafe considering the hour. So I settled for the only space in between. When Kaz found me sitting on the steps and playing a solitary card game I had been so stunned by embarrassment I just offered to deal him in. I had been more shocked when he silently accepted my offer.

"Practice?" Jesper repeats. "You were laughing, I heard you."

"That was one time--how do you know we didn't just happen to play cards together the one time you saw it?"

"Because you laughed about a play you considered 'predictable'."

Sighing, I sit up a little straighter. "I'm not having this conversation. Occasionally saying 'goodnight' to someone who lives in the same space I live in and sometimes playing cards with said person because we both happen to be up at a certain time doesn't mean anything."

"And the way he looked at the contact that was flirting with you?"

Oh...this conversation again. "For the last time, the contact wasn't flirting with me. We had to dance to blend in and when he leaned towards me to whisper in my ear...it was to tell me the intel Kaz just had to have."

"And when he tucked that strand of hair behind your ear?"

"He just wanted to sell our cove--"

"Y/n, he kissed your cheek and I'm fairly certain he would have kissed you if Kaz and I hadn't made it to the corridor at that second."

Why is everyone so obsessed with what would have never happened? The contact had been attractive, tall with fair eyes and hair. But it's not like I feel anything for him, nor would I have been so foolish during a job. A fact that Kaz refuses to believe. I'm tired of this argument...I'm just tired. This job required me to start getting ready early in the morning and lasted long into the night.

"I wouldn't have kissed him and even if I had, the fact that Kaz is so mad about feels...sexist." A stupid argument, considering that Kaz couldn't care less if the person he's working with is female, male, or anything in between because the only thing he cares about is profit. "It's a stupid thing to be mad about, but you hit on anything with a pulse at any time and--"

"I resent that--"

"For the first two weeks I was here I thought you might've been a prostitute."

I can feel him holding in a laugh. "Did you at least think I was a good prostitute?" When I glare again, he finally actually laughs. "Not the point--got it."

"Then what is the point? You're bored and obsessed with gossip so now you're shaking me for information you don't need."

"The point is you're oblivious." Rude...I move my leg in a weak attempt to push him off my bed. Jesper catches my ankle easily, ignoring my attempt at a fight. "You thought the contact was only doing his job and you don't know the real reason that Kaz blew up at you for the first time the way he blows up at everyone."

"Okay, well since you know everything, tell me why he's mad."

He lets out a sigh like he can't believe I even needed to ask that. "It's not the best look that the first time you let him pick a fight with you happens to be about some guy."

...Maybe he is drunk? "Don't be so cryptic. I don't like you enough to put up with that."

Jesper half-sighs again before pushing himself off my bed. "I'm going to pretend I think you're smart enough to piece things together from that."

"Asshole," I mumble instinctually as he walks towards my door. "Are you not telling me because I tried to push you off the bed?"

He turns when he reaches my door in order to lean against my door frame. "It's not not because of that." I should throw my book at his head. "In all seriousness, think about it. If you don't you'll either kill each other or kill me."

Ugh...he's so confusing. This time, I let him go. He leaves he door open, which is beyond annoying. I stand up to close it, promising myself I will focus on my book the second it's in my hands again. As I walk back towards my bed, my eyes land on the deck of cards on my nightstand.

Does it send a signal I don't want to send if I don't go the stairwell tonight? Do I want to send a signal? I don't know...actually, the only thing I know is that I don't want to think about this a second longer. I don't ease as I read, but my eyelids become heavier with each word they cross. I feel the weight of them as my focus slips, farther and farther away until I can no longer focus. When my eyes fall shut I can't bring myself to think or force them open.

I notice my surprised before I register that I've just woken up. Falling asleep feels so far and yet the crick in my neck confirms the obvious. Rubbing the eyes with the back of my hand, I push my book from my lap and sit up. The only indication of how much time has passed is how much my bedside candle has melted.

How long have I been asleep? How did I manage to fall asleep? I thought I was too mad at Kaz to manage anything but pouting in my room. I hadn't even decided if I wanted to talk to him.

I stand even though I haven't decided anything. I should at least change if I want to go to bed. But is leaving this alone for even longer a bad idea? I think Jesper thought so...though my conversation with him is far from clear. It's not the best look that the first time you let him pick a fight with you happens to be about some guy. I'm going to pretend I think you're smart enough to piece things together from that. What does he want me to do with that?

Maybe he was partially intoxicated and felt the need to play the role of a good friend. Or maybe this is his idea of a joke.

Whatever--regardless of Jesper, I have a choice to make. A tiny part of me hopes it's insignificant, but I know Kaz enough to know that nothing is insignificant to him. He holds onto things the way he holds onto his kruge. Perhaps I'll seek out Inej, she seems to be the best at rationalizing. Though she might be asleep by now, or on a job or...I don't even know.

How late is it? Is it late enough to be one of the few hours Kaz claims to reserve for sleep? Maybe my bad luck is still around and he's already in bed for once. Does that mean his anger will extend to tomorrow?

I shouldn't care. It's not like I'm in the wrong. Did I escalate things? Maybe a little...but I won't apologize for defending myself. Even though that makes everything a little easier. I feel stuck, like in some kind of place of half sleep. A single knock at my door is enough to make me want to jump. I rub my eyes a little more firmly in hopes of waking up more before someone sees me.

I approach the door without worry. Maybe it's not as late as I assumed. Or maybe it's really early? I open the door while still fighting against my slight disorientation. I'm so focused on acting normal, I almost don’t register the person standing at my door.

I don’t know who I expected, or what--maybe Jesper, much more tipsy than he was before, slumped against the doorframe, only knocking because he’s too tired to push the door open. Maybe even Inej, on her way here to deliver some kind of job or notice of dismissal. But it’s nothing I could expect. It’s...Kaz.

The Dirtyhands stands at my door, expression as hard as ever yet something behind his eyes that burns the sleep away from me. “Uh--hi.” I bite my tongue to avoid cringing at that very awkward beginning. “Are you here to kick me out yourself?” The only response I get is the slightest shift of his gaze off of my face. “No? Well then I think I’m going to bed. It’s late.”

My tone and words are clear. Get out of my doorway, I’m in no mood to go back to arguing. When he still doesn’t say anything, I’m emboldened by my nerves. I push the door between us without breaking eye contact.

Before the wood can meet the doorframe, he moves his cane, wedging it between us. “Y/n.” I don’t understand the way he says my name, but I’m certain he’s never said it like that. “I...” When he’s not prompted by the uncomfortableness of silence, I raise an eyebrow, my grip on the door tightening. “What I said shouldn’t have been said.” Wait--is he admitting fault? I’m so thrown I almost melt entirely. “Not to you.”

The addition leaves him so lowly a part of me wonders if I’ve imagined it. I’m so thrown by it I don’t even think to reply until a long second has passed. “You seemed to believe the opposite a few hours ago.”

His lips press together for a moment. “You didn’t ask me to play cards tonight.” He took that as intentional? At least that got me some kind of apology? I keep my mouth shut, greed making me want more information. I guess he must sense my silent tugging because he head inclines slightly. “Don’t push.”

I fight down a grin. “Push what?” His only response to stiffen further. “I’m going to tell you something as a peace offering.” That seems to intrigue him in some way. I can’t tell if it’s a good kind of interested, but I note the slight raise of his eyebrows and his intentional silence. “I didn’t chose not to ask you to play cards.” He gives me no indication of anything, which is fair...considering my vagueness. “I was mad, obviously, and in the middle of deciding on a course of action...and then I fell asleep.”

A long pause of silence. “You fell asleep?”

I’m not sure if his incredulous tone should offend me or not. If I wanted to lie, I’d like to think he knows me well enough to know that I’d have thought of a better excuse than that. Or at least a less embarrassing one. “Yes, it’s not that difficult to believe. Today had been long and all I wanted to do was read, but then Jesper came in to say the oddest things and then leave me to...”

Oh--oh. I guess there’s a reason people say to ‘sleep on’ something. Because now, actively remembering Jesper’s words for the first time since I fell asleep...I understand what Jesper was implying in the oddest way possible. He meant that Kaz and I...that perhaps there is a Kaz and I in a context that’s more than just grammatical. Wow. I really had to realize this with Kaz right in front of me.

My face feels warmer than it did before, an irrational bout of anxiety forcing me to consider that me might be able to read impossible, embarrassing thoughts from my expression alone.

“What did Jesper say?” I’m too lost in my own spiral of confusion and panic and some feeling I can’t recognize to register how Kaz asks his question. There’s an edge to it, an odd one, but that could easily just be Kaz.

This is most definitely the last conversation we need to be having. I’m still mad at him for his earlier dramatics. So I just shake my head, feigning an exhaustion I could lose myself in. “Nothing and everything all at once.” I resist the urge to rub my eyes again. “I’m pretty sure he was drinking, and I wasn’t really listening. I was just trying to read.”

Kaz’s expression hardens briefly as he takes in my words, and then he exhales, nodding once with the breath. “What were you reading?”

My lips part instinctually, ready to spew off details about the latest novel that’s captured my attention. But before I can let myself take off, the reality of the situation strikes me directly in the chest. This is not Nina, or Inej, or even Jesper after what he considers a ‘good night’. This is Kaz Brekker, the man believed to not have a soul. I’ve spoken to him before about casual things, though most of the nights in which we end up playing cards or just sitting near each other are spent in silence. But he’s never prompted me before. Not in the one topic he knows is guaranteed to turn me into an overenthusiastic, gushing fountain of poor summaries and character analysis.

I guess this is his peace offering. This shouldn’t warm the way it does. He was still unbelievably dramatic and treated me like I’m some kind of unreliable fool. “It’s late, and you know how I can be. I’d hate to keep you for nothing more than a poor summary and honestly, an embarrassing rant about plot or characters, because there’s just nothing as frustrating as when two people so clearly care about each other and both are too stubborn and oblivious to acknowledge it.”

Kaz’s eyebrows draw together just enough for me to be able to make out a shift of expression in the poor light. Perhaps his lingering irritation is preparing to rear its ugly head. The corner of his mouth seems to threaten to tilt upwards as Kaz angles his head to the side slightly. “I can’t imagine that position.”

No kidding. I bite my tongue to keep the sarcastic comment and awkward laugh that would sure follow it away. “Who can? That’s like half the point of reading.”

How can interaction feel so over and just at its beginning all at once? I press my lips together to avoid filling the silence with things I’d no doubt instantly regret. It’s easy to be mad at Kaz in the moment. Too easy. But to stay mad at him when his temper has passed and he returns with some kind of begrudging and admittedly awkward and uncertain truce is another task entirely.

“I’ve never understood your attachment to written words.”

“It’s not about understanding, it’s about everything else.”

“And you say I’m cryptic.” Is he...kinda almost joking? I straighten my spine, too tired to fight and too wounded to forgive. “There’s understanding in everything, nothing can survive on sentiment alone.”

“If you read the way I did, you’d understand.”

His lips press together as his expression remains unwavering in its hardness. “Read to me.”

...Interacting with Kaz in any way often leaves me feeling like I’m wandering through unknown territory. But this, this is undeniably different. So different I can’t even think of a way to react. I watch his expression as cautiously as possible. He’s purely reserved, no distinction from the look he wears during business propositions. Except there’s a tightness I can’t quite understand.

Maybe it’s because I don’t want to fight anymore. Maybe it’s because exhaustion is leaving me partially delirious. Or maybe it’s the weird feeling in my chest that I can’t quite place. That I don’t want to place. “Okay.” I shift carefully. “If for no other reason then to prove you wrong.”

Never did I think I’d end up in the position of sitting in my bed, book in hand, with Kaz Brekker sitting next to me. But here we are. I’m so tired, I almost let out a nervous laugh when he first walked in. So brooding and tall, gripping the head of his head cane as he sits at the foot of my bed, on my pastel quilt.

I’m glad for the excuse to keep my gaze away from him and on the words in front of me. I read out loud, feeling more and more comfortable with each page I finish. But as my inhibitions slip away, so dos my hold on consciousness. My eyelids seem to grow heavier with each word that I read.

“You’re falling asleep.”

I straighten my spine on instinct. “Am not.” I’m not sure why I feel the need to deny something so simple.

“You’re impossible.”

From him, that statement is laugh worthy. “I’m impossible? Do you not remember earlier today?”

From the way his jaw locks, I realize that he’s in no mood to be light about this topic. I don’t understand why. It’s not like I’m the one that wronged him. “I remember your lack of focus.”

Keeping my hands at my side to avoid rubbing my eyes, I frown. “If you want to have this argument again, fine. Jesper is more ‘distracted’ than me half the time and you’re much more lenient on him. It’s not like I was flirting with someone or gambling or doing anything but having a two second conversation. One that I needed to have to get information that you wanted.”

The last time we fought, I had more energy to restrain myself. This could be atomic. I hold my breath, waiting for Kaz’s retaliation. He exhales, eyes not meeting mine. “Arguing with you when you’re present is exhausting enough. It’s not worth it when you’re half asleep.”

This angers me further. I hate that he’s right. “I’m not half asleep.” He leaves it at that. I glare even harder at him, slumping further into my bed. “But for the sake of argument, I’ll drop it. Something you’re incapable of doing.”

At that, his eyes meet mine. I try to hold his gaze, but the harder I think about not seeming tired the more exhaustion slips in. A yawn escapes me before he looks away. Great. “I know when to lie in the grass in wait.”

Rolling my eyes, I shift back slightly. He’s incapable of being less dramatic than this. Still, I can’t imagine the effort it’s taking on his part to not start an argument. Maybe this is why Jesper spent so long implying that there may be a Kaz and I in any capacity beyond a vague kind of friendship. “I’ll admit you’re tactful.”

“Resourceful people recognize that trait in other people.”

Blinking twice, I lower my book slightly. Am I truly exhausted, or did he just compliment me in a way? “Careful, I may start to think you find me tolerable.”

“Let’s not exaggerate.” Okay, now I know I’m exhausted because I think he might have just attempted a joke. Rolling my eyes, I decide not to acknowledge this lightness in fear that I’ll scare it away. “Y/n?”

I press my lips together, worried about the destruction of our peace. “Yes?”

“What did Jesper say to you? Earlier?” I pause, slightly unsure why we’re moving backwards.

We’re in a decent place now, and I’d hate to ruin it. I’m too half asleep to lie eloquently. And it’s not like he’s an easily convinced man. “Oh, he said it so cryptically it took me longer than it should have to understand. And it didn’t help that it was something so...well, you might find it funny. As funny as you find anything, anyways.” Wow...I’ve spent such a long time talking. Rubbing the back of my eyes, I avoid his gaze. Exhaustion and awkwardness mix in my stomach oddly. “It seemed like he was trying to imply that you and I...me and you...” Why is this a difficult thing to say? It’s not like I was implying it and Jesper’s known for his oddness. “I think Jesper was implying that there was a you and I, or at least that there could be.” I’m too lost in a haze of almost sleep to watch his reaction. I let my head rest against my headboard even further. “Isn’t that odd?”

He’s quiet for a long second, and then he finally speaks again. “Odd, even for Jesper.” The response doesn’t satiate me...what’s that about? I exhale, deciding that feeling is tomorrow’s problem. When I blink, I decide to let my eyes stay closed. Just for a moment. The sound of something shifting is what makes my eyes squint open. Kaz is standing, his expression unreadable as he straightens. “Goodnight, y/n.”

At that, I sit up slightly, ignoring the exhaustion behind my eyes. “I haven’t finished the chapter.”

“You’ve convinced me of enough.” A concession? How exhausted do I seem? My lips press together as I think of my next argument. Before I can get it out, Kaz leans forward. He grabs the quilt at the end of my bed and tosses it onto my legs casually. “Goodnight, y/n.” The meaning of his repetition is clear. His word is final.

I find enough energy to manage a glare, but I pull the quilt over my legs anyways. “Goodnight, Kaz.”

#kaz brekker #kaz brekker x reader #kaz brekker imagine #kaz brekker x you #shadow and bone #shadow and bone x reader #shadow and bone imagine #shadow and bone fic #shadow and bone netflix #shadow and bone imagines #six of crows #six of crows x reader #six of crows imagine #six of crows show #shadow and bone show #six of crows netflix

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aetherarf · 3 years

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Hi hello i saw your requests are open!! And i dont know if this is allowed but can you do genshin boys caught cheating and they played it off and later on they started to regret what they did and when they found the reader, the reader is now happy or disappeared or idk ITS UP TO YOU TO DEICIDE HEHEHEHE IM SORRY I LOVE READING ANGST SM SO ITS OKAY IF YOU WONT TAKE IT !! YOUR WORKS ARE REALLY GREAT BTW!!! (more than great i mean *chefs kiss*)

Yes I've finally gotten to this one! I hope it's angsty enough for you 😘

[[ WARNING: CHEATING, NON-LETHAL INJURY, ALCOHOL ]]

[[ Summary: Kaeya, Childe, and Diluc end up cheating on their partner... They get caught, not by their partner, but someone else. As the days pass, they begin to regret it... only for their little secret to get back to their lover...

Note, Kaeya's is longest/wordiest cuz I didn't realize I should probably be a bit more brief... Kaeya favouritism lol.

Overall Word Count: 3'602 [rip me]

Kaeya Word Count: 1'841

Childe Word Count: 950

Diluc Word Count: 811 ]]

Kaeya

Distantly, he remembers an old saying from Crepus, in response to his question-- "Why do people drink so much?"

"Well... Alcohol doesn't solve anything, but it can make you forget questions you'd rather not think about."

He understood that as he got older. Why stress, and think about things he could not control? ... Well, maybe he should deal with them, but that's easier said than done when his entire life was on the line. Every night, in the tavern, he drank to forget. Not that he'd admit that to anyone.

And, somehow, he had forgotten more than he'd like to admit. On his lap, a beautiful woman, and he was tugged to a back closet of the Angel's Share. She tasted sweet, like wine and sugar. If it wasn't for an intruder, ( despite the fact that he was the one intruding into staff-only area ) he likely would have had a far better time, to completely lose himself in his inebriation.

"K-Kaeya!" Uh oh, as his vision focused, he could see Diluc's unmistakable silhouette, with that fluffy red hair and broad shoulders. "You," he pointed to the woman, "Out." The woman, not wanting to envoke the wrath of Sir Ragnvindr, running out immediately. But, Diluc didn't let Kaeya out, not that he was fighting to get out. Instead, he walked closer.

"What have you done?" he asked, voice low and full of rage. However, Kaeya could only smile,

"What do you mean, Master Ragnvindr?" He asked, all sly.

"You cheater," he snapped, "You do know that wasn't your partner? The one you swore yourself to? They were just looking for you, you know." He was nearly yelling, forcing his voice low...

And that, that idea, the realization of everything hit him harder than even the biggest bomb's that Klee had ever made. He... did.

"Look," The world was no longer warm an fuzzy, just a little shift away from his normal reality, everything crashing down. The thoughts that haunted him when you slept so peacefully in his arms, when he would see the knights laughing and smiling together, the ever-haunting knowledge that he was alone amongst them...

The way only you did not have that odd look in your eye, of wonder upon seeing something unique, or of something alien that terrified... You only looked at him as what he wished to be seen-a person.

And here he went, fucking it all up.

"Look," he said again, tears in his eye, "You, you can't tell anyone," He all but snapped at Diluc, who's eyes widened in shock, "I-I wouldn't tell if you did it, you have to do the same for me," he promised, desperately trying to think of what to do...

"Kaeya, this isn't about me, this is about you and-and them," Diluc didn't even need to say the name, "You're better than this, I won't tell, but only if you do."

Kaeya's brows furrowed, he wasn't used to feeling so... betrayed. Normally, it was expected, but this... but this was different! Wasn't it...?

"It has nothing to do with you, I... I can deal with it on my own, 'Luc." He insisted, straightening out his back. He was only a tiny bit taller than Diluc, but he wanted to hold it over him, to prove he wasn't going to let him use him over his... his mistake.

"Kaeya," his voice was... softer. Kaeya didn't want to hear this voice, this consoling voice. Not after everything, not... not like this!

"Fuck off, Diluc," he snapped, pushing him to the wall as he stormed out, "You made it clear you want nothing to do with me, don't try now. Not like this," he demanded, seeing Diluc look at him, eyes wide... shocked.

"Fine. Get out and don't come back." Diluc hissed, voice much lower, his eyes glazed over. Kaeya almost wanted to yell at him, to keep fighting... But, no, no, he didn't. He couldn't do that here, not when he was too desperate to figure out what to do, leaving through the front of Angel's Share, slamming the door behind him.

And he ran. He didn't know why, he wasn't headed home, but he just... he felt like he was running from his mistakes, the wind biting at his face, until he finally skidded into an alleyway, his back against the wall, his hand put up to his mouth, biting at the base of his thumb to stifle the sobs that wanted to burst from his chest. It hurt, oh, it hurt, but it felt... right, it felt like he should hurt, his teeth clasping harder onto his hand, tears rolling from his eye as he roughly breathed through his nostrils, his brain desperately trying to figure out what to do, what to say, what to think... But it all only ended up in a jumbled mess, of black and red and tears and crying.

He didn't know how long he sat there, but by the time he stopped biting his hand, it felt... hot, for some reason, and as he looked at his hand...

Red. Bite marks. His teeth had sunk in so deep, his skin was broken and reddened and bloody. He couldn't even feel the pain, like when the burning fire had turned to grey, dead embers... he felt nothing, his own bodily sensations distant in an odd way.

He doesn't even know why, but upon seeing his blood ooze from his flesh, he swing his fist towards the brick, hearing it clatter against it. He stared at his hand, pulling off his glove to stare, dazed, at his busted knuckles.

Holding his fist close to his chest, he finally walked home.

If I don't tell them, he thought, I can live with it. I've lived with worse. I live with worse.

He didn't want to.

But he did that-he cheated. He cheated on the one person that could make everything feel okay, like he never hurt anyone, like he wasn't from a distant corrupt land, like he wasn't the monster he was told to be.

Should he say it? Tell directly?

...

It wouldn't matter if he told immediately or in a week. He-he trusted you'd understand, he could... He could figure it out. He just, his brain was both sinking and floating, drunk yet sober, he wasn't in his own body right about now. He was somewhere gone, and he couldn't be making any decisions.

Shambling his way home, he opened the front door... And hesitated, listening. Looking. You weren't in eyeshot or earshot, so... He could wrap up his hand before he gave everything away, or at least, his temper tantrum of sorts. He rummaged around before finding that small first aide kit, cleaning the wounds of his own cause, and bandaged up his hand... for a second, he tensed, hearing your footsteps, but he opted to finish wrapping it before you could see.

"Kaeyaaa..." You whined, "You didn't come to bed..." You walked over, hugging him from the side, resting your head on him. How sweet you were, how cuddly... As though nothing happened.

"I'll come to bed in a minute," he said, "I just need to finish this real quick."

You peeked over to look at whatever he was messing with, and woke up in an instant, reaching over to his hand as he was tucking the end of the bandage away, so it wouldn't unravel so easily. "What happened?" You asked, tenderly holding his injured hand with both of yours.

"Nothing to be worried about," he reassured, trying to hide how his voice shook, "Just wanted to patch it up."

With one hand, you gently stroked his, and then lifted it to your mouth to give a loving kiss atop it. "Are you okay to come to bed?" You asked, still tired from the late hour.

"Of course," he wanted to kiss you, badly, but he refrained. You shouldn't, Kaeya, your mouth is dirty.

The two of you walked to bed, he undressing just enough to comfortably lie down...

Feeling how you snuggled up to him, sighing in such comfort now that he was home, and how you soon became a weight upon him as you sunk back into sleep...

However, he did not sleep that night. Or the next, or the next... Or the next.

Days, truly, passed. He did not sleep, he was not sleeping, Jean even scolded him for blacking out more than once, stunned when one second he was standing, and the next he was on the ground, no memory of having fallen, with the knights consoling him.

He started staying later, he had not gone back to the Angel's Share. Many mornings, he was not there when you woke. You knew he was busy, but... this was horrific.

Eventually, two weeks have passed. He steeled his nerves, and he was going to talk to you about it. He didn't want to live like this, with this guilt and agony upon the things he could not fix--but he could fix this. He could-he could make this better.

But, as he walked into your shared home... an eerie silence. As he looked around, it felt like... a lot was missing.

Everything that was missing, from simple objects placed about to pictures on the walls, were all yours. Of you.

Save for a single picture frame, with shattered glass, and a picture of him and you, smiling. It was one of the more coherent pictures the two of you had made.

Beside it, a note.

Dear Kaeya,

A woman came to me recently, telling me of you. Of how you kissed her, and nearly slept with her at the Angel's Share. She was unaware of the fact that you had a partner, and had finally found and confided in me about this.

I don't know what made you cheat on me like this, but worse still you've been avoiding me, and you wouldn't even tell me. If I knew... then we could have talked about it, we could have gotten counseling. We could have fixed this--fixed us. But you were gone.

I don't want to hear you say it, say that you don't love me or you don't want to be with me, so I left. I'm not in Mondstadt, I've gone to live with someone I can actually trust. Please don't look for me, I need time. Your lack of communication was enough to tell me you don't care enough to fix this.

Sincerely, Your former beloved.

Tears truckled down onto the paper, and he nearly crushed it in a single fist... But, no, he couldn't, he couldn't destroy the last connection he had to you, no matter how badly he wanted to rip out his eye, so he never had to look at it ever again. He collapsed the floor, the letter, and the framed picture falling to the ground, a broken, loud laughter rung through the house as tears fells down his face, maniacal in nature...

He wanted to be alone, and gone, for a long... long time.

Childe

Childe didn't understand the meaning of 'exclusive' as well. He loved you, dearly, but to him, love was a thing to be given more freely. Maybe it was just a lack of communication, or maybe he completely misunderstood your words, but with an old friend he slept with time and time again...

When Scaramouche saw him sending off his friend with a goodbye kiss, it being a casual commoditiy in his mind, only then did he get utterly chewed out for this.

"Are you a fucking idiot?" Scaramouche snarled at him, "You're not even shameful about this, you cheater." He snapped, as though he was truly angry for you, instead of just a generally very angry person. Childe shrugged.

"I wouldn't mind if they slept with someone else," he said casually, "Doesn't mean they love me any less, you know?"

Scaramouche tried to response, but he was simply flabberghasted. "Most people don't think that way, you airheaded moron."

Childe just laughed, brushing off the shorter harbinger, before walking off without a care.

But... in the end, the words got to him.

Maybe you didn't think that way? You two had spoken of marriage, a very possible reality that he was looking forward to... But, maybe there was a... culture clash, maybe? A clash of upbringings?

He found himself wondering these things at night, when you were snuggled up to him, unaware of the whirlwind of fear in his mind.

Silently, he resolved to simply stop--It would keep you happy, a little secret he didn't mind keeping. Maybe in many, many years, he'd mention it, but... he thought that was okay. That could be the last time he'd ever do something like that...

But, as he came home... You were sitting, waiting for him.

"Please, come sit down, Ajax," that morose tone, it made his heart ache... so he obeyed without question. You looked at him, face puffy and eyes red... "Tell me the truth," you asked, his heart sinking, "Did you cheat on me?"

He froze, but... "Y-yes, but-"

"I don't need an explanation," you admitted, a small, broken smile on your face, "I knew I wasn't loveable enough."

"Wait, no, no, that's not it at all-"

"No," you interrupted, "I don't need an explanation. I'll be out by tonight," you looked down at your lap, his heart shattering into even smaller pieces,

"Babe... please, please, let me explain, I'll never do it again-"

You stood,

"If you'd do it once, you'd do it again. Don't talk to me," you hesitated, "If you want me to be happy, don't look for me ever again."

He was trying to reach for you... but, he couldn't make himself grab you, not when you so delicately shied away...

Eventually, he gave up. No amount of fighting would stop you, and... and he... he couldn't keep seeing your pain as you cried for him to just leave you alone.

Was this love? The pain of another, the terror not of considering spending the rest of your life with them, but the terror of not spending the rest of your life with them?

Before he knew it, he was staring at a mirror, shards of glass in his fist, more than a few holes in the wall and a broken door, the shattered mirror distorting his expression...

Upon walking through the house, he saw that there was... it felt so empty, without your delicate touch and presence making it a place he lovingly called home.

"No," he whispered, hoping... were you here? Did you see... whatever he blacked out and did, the tantrum he did not remember? Did he, oh gods above, oh gods, he didn't hurt you, did he?

...

But he never got an opportunity to find out.

By the time he had sobered up from his tantrum... you were gone. Only a note, left behind, Don't look for me.

Because, you both knew, if he really wanted to find you, he could. He could capture you, trap you... hurt you.

But he didn't want any of that, as much as it hurt to have you away... to make you hate him anymore than you already did was enough to drive a man to near insanity.

Even after you had been gone, he would sit, whenever he was not forced to work, to fulfil his duties to the Tsaritsa... he would wait. He would cook your favourite dishes, read the books you liked, go to the places you enjoyed...

Only after weeks of this, did it hit him that you truly were never coming home. He knew that, but... but, somehow, his heart, his emotions hadn't caught up.

For a second time, he had destroyed your shared, no... his home.

It just wasn't home without you.

Unable to endure the idea of still being here, of a place where he had held you so many times, kissed you, loved you, and suddenly you were all but gone... He tried to do anything to avoid it, to avoid that demon that desperately tried to crawl out of him, threatening to burst from his chest.

Even the other Harbingers had noticed this, how... awful he had been, how he had lost himself. Even Scaramouche, the one most openly said to be the easiest to hate amongst them all, with an uncanny talent to bring even the most pacificistic souls to pure rage, had done well to stay his tongue, never kind, never sweet, but he would give him the isolation he craved, only speaking as much was necessary.

He didn't know what to do with himself, but whenever that happened... he'd just throw himself to the maws of death and, unluckily, crawl his way back out.

Diluc

Everything felt hot and fuzzy and...

Red.

Was red a feeling? His face was red, his body burned, and he could scarcely breathe, he definitely had accidentally drunk some alcohol, but for once, the effects of inebriation hit him. However, while he couldn't understand why people would devote their lives to this sensation, he could appreciate reality being distant, when he knew if he wasn't drunk, he would have spit up the wine and some extra blood, making it an even richer red color.

A warm feeling around his dick, he saw a pretty, if not distorted, face. It didn't take long for him to explode with sensation, his eyes shot wide... and a kiss pressed to his lips.

He almost chased that pretty face, only to see it disappear, he falling to his knees, rasping for air. Moments later, he felt hands on his shoulder's, shaking him. He shot his head up, seeing Kaeya looking at him in fear, and distantly, he heard his name...

"Diluc. Diluc. Diluc! Say something!"

Diluc stared at him, and opened his mouth to speak, but he only ended up jerking his head down, coughing into his elbow, seeing blood on his black coat... Kaeya noticed, too, frozen in shock.

"What happened?" he asked, his eye wide in shock.

"I..." Diluc rasped out, and his eyes widened in shock.

He realized what he had done.

He. He slept with someone who was most definitely not the one he had sworn himself to. Some-some random woman who was likely enchanted by the prospect of a rich man.

"Diluc!" Kaeya shouted, afraid, "What happened?"

Diluc shoved himself up, his hand on Kaeya's shoulder, already rushing to run out and all the way back to the Winery-but not before Kaeya grabbed him, stopping him, strength near equally matched.

"'Luc, I'm not letting you go anywhere until you-"

"I did," Diluc was still gasping for air, "I did something terrible." He admitted, with no small amount of pain.

"What did you do?" Kaeya asked, "Don't run, don't run, you're going to choke on your own blood-"

"No!" Diluc shouted, throwing Kaeya off his arm, running on pure adrenaline, even as his face was beet red, and his vision blurred.

But he needed to confess his sins, immediately, he needed to... now, now, now!

He heard Kaeya shout, but in the end, as he had to stop just to rasp for air again, the burn of alcohol still in his throat, he heard no shouting, nothing but the sound of his thundering heartbeats in his own ears.

Finally, he got to the Winery. You saw him, shocked, seeing his red face and how distressed he was, his hair nothing short of a fluffy mess.

"Diluc," you run over, he leaning on you, just to not collapse from the lack of air, "Diluc, what's wrong?"

"I-I..." He shuttered out, sucking in a breath, "I cheated on you."

You were reeling, "You-What?"

"I-I accidentally drank wine. I was drunk, I can't..." He was still heaving, "I can't breathe... I don't... I don't know what happened, but... She... a woman, she..."

He couldn't finish, but he didn't need to.

"You cheated on me and the first thing you did was come home and brag about it?" You asked, equal parts anguish and anger,

"No," he rasped, his knees buckling as the world tried to disappear on him, "I can't..." his hand went to his throat, "Wait..."

He didn't know what happened, but he only saw flashes after that--Your tears, his bloodied hands, you leaving.

And he was alone, on the ground, barely able to breathe, to think... to do anything.

You left him.

You were gone.

And, somehow, he wasn't mad at all. Having breathed long enough to move again, he stood... and he found the half-empty bottle of wine left on the table, the wine you adored so.

He grabbed the bottle and drank straight from it, feeling his throat and tongue swell, it crashing to the ground as he fell, unable to rasp even the slightest breaths,

I deserve this, he thought, I deserve this. This is all I deserve.

...

...?

For some reason, despite his better wishes, he woke up. He lay in bed, a cool, wet cloth over his forehead... his flesh burned, and his tongue was still swollen, he unable to wiggle it in his mouth. His breathing, still, was labored, but it seemed that he was still breathing, despite everything.

He watched as Adelinde cautiously walked over, looking down at his face, "... Master Diluc, are you alright?"

No, he wasn't, but he could not even sob and cry, for he could not breathe enough to do so.

A cruel twist of fate, but he was not deserving to cry, he was the one who hurt you. You did nothing but love him.

He didn't deserve anything right now.

#genshin impact #genshin x reader #kaeya #diluc #childe #genshin kaeya #genshin diluc #genshin childe #kaeya x reader #diluc x reader #childe x reader #bark writes #// also dw anon i've written way more messed up stuff than this #// :)#// also idk why ppl cheat beyond the thrill of it and i wanted to make it more interesting than that #// chlide was the closest to that idea #// i got some shitty news + people who didnt stop bringing it up so this took way more time than i'd like to admit

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nsheetee · 3 years

Text

For Life (109 Steps to You Epilogue)

read “109 Steps to You” here!

Genre: epilogue, angst, fluff, soulmate AU Length: 5.4k Summary: Donghyuck and Y/N meet again one year after their last encounter, back at the place where it all started.

a/n: this is for everyone who asked for a part 2, I hope you all enjoy ♡

this is the epilogue for “109 Steps to You,” please read that fic before continuing!

Haechan walks into the cafe, the scent of espresso hitting him square in the face. He doesn’t have to walk far into the shop to find his two best friends sitting at one of the tables. Silence falls over the table once Haechan orders a drink and the waitress walks away. The three men sit mutely for a bit, looking at their phones or outside the big windows at the people walking by outside, until Haechan draws their attention.

“Huang Renjun, you invited me here and you won’t even say hi when I sit down.” At his ice breaker, Renjun lets out a shy laugh and turns in his seat to pay attention to his friend.

“Hi.” He says.

“Hi.” Haechan says back sarcastically.

“Hi.” Jaemin pipes up from across the table.

Somehow, conversation became a lot easier after that.

Haechan never thought it would be awkward with his longtime friends, especially since it has been only a year since the three of them graduated college and moved on. Jaemin works as an elementary school music teacher (just an assistant, for now) and he shows the guys some pictures of his students, commenting about how so many of them have natural talent. Renjun decided to do the graduate program and stayed on campus.

“What about you, Haechan, what have you been up to?” Jaemin asks and takes a sip of his iced americano.

“Oh… Nothing special. I work at SM Entertainment.” The guys’ eyes widen at the “not so special” news and Renjun almost chokes on his bagel.

“As an artist?” Renjun coughs out.

“No, god no, I write music for them, and they liked me enough to let me produce songs in the future, so they have me a full time job.” Haechan explains.

“Dude, that’s insane. Congrats, that’s what you always wanted to do, right?” Jaemin asks, still looking a bit amazed by his friend’s accomplishments.

“Yeah.. I guess.” Haechan trails off, laughing afterwards and praying someone will have something to say to get the attention off of him.

“Actually, there’s a reason I wanted to meet you guys here…” Renjun sits up straighter, making Haechan and Jaemin glance at each other. “I’m going to marry Mya.”

“Renjun…” Jaemin turns soft, his eyes turning rounder and his bottom lip pouting at the news, making Renjun roll his eyes and laugh. His joy is just at the thought of marrying his soulmate, the one he has spent the past five years with.

Haechan has to swallow down the lump in his throat to congratulate his friend, ruffling his blonde hair and saying something about how he can’t believe Renjun is the first to get married out of the three of them. When Haechan was with you, they were all sure that he would be the one to get married first. Oh, how easily things can change.

“I was hoping you guys would help me? I want to ask her under the bell tower, the same place I asked her to be my girlfriend, but I want to do it at night. I need help setting things up.”

“Of course we’ll help, right, Haechan?” Jaemin asks, looking over at his other friend. Haechan knew that by coming to this small reunion, he would have to face a part of his past, but he decided to come anyway. The past year has been tough, but Renjun has been Haechan’s friend for longer than he can remember, so this is the least he could do.

“Of course,” He nods. “Anything for Renjunie.” He adds a pat on the head with the pet name and Renjun slaps his hand away, giving him a scowl. The two guys would have continued with their play fighting if it wasn’t for Jaemin suddenly standing up, his chair skidding back along the tile floor loudly.

Haechan and Renjun glance up at him, but his eyes are glued to the entrance of the cafe. They turn around just in time to catch a girl stopping in her steps, her eyes focused on Jaemin. It’s been years; her hair is longer than before and she definitely grew up since the last time they saw her, but it’s no doubt Yeji, Jaemin’s soulmate and the one who rejected him when they were teenagers in high school.

“Jaemin.” She clears her throat, looking at the three guys, “You’re all here. Why am I not surprised your friendship lasted this long?” She laughs lightly as she recognizes the group of friends.

“Do you want to sit?” Jaemin points at the fourth chair at their table that has yet to be occupied. Yeji nods slowly and makes her way to the seat, gently sitting down and smiling shyly at the three guys. There’s a silence that falls over the table as everyone sips on their drinks, but the world around them continues on living loudly.

“So, what have you been up to recently?” Jaemin asks and turns to face her.

“Oh, I’m finishing college this year. I go to UOS.” She proudly smiles.

“Oh? We all went there too, we never saw you?” Renjun asks.

“I took a leap year, so I started college after you guys. You probably didn’t see me around because of that.”

“What did you do during your leap year?” Haechan asks, leaning back in his seat.

“I was in the hospital.” When three pairs of wide, serious eyes stare back at her, she laughs and waves her hand at them, “Oh no, it wasn’t anything bad. I found out my immune system is weak and spent some time figuring out what medicine to take and making my body stronger so I don’t get sick easily. That’s why I was gone for part our last year of school, too.” She explains and the three guys unstiffen and nod.

“Is that why you rejected me?” With Jaemin’s sudden question, Renjun and Haechan felt like they shouldn’t be sitting at the table anymore. They glance at each other, both wondering the same thing: should we leave?

“No,” She looks over at her soulmate, and then glances at Renjun and Haechan, “I guess I should explain myself now, huh?”

“Please.” Since Yeji rejected Jaemin, he turned into a different person. His affectionate and compassionate side is still present, but he tended to keep a calm and neutral front during most of his time in college that made some people think he’s a mean and scary person. Haechan and Renjun are very curious as to why Yeji dumped Jaemin all of a sudden, for the sake of their friend, and stay seated to hear what Yeji has to say..

“I only have one mark.” She explains. Jaemin looks at her a bit dumbfounded.

“What do you mean? Where’s the other one?” He asks and glances over her as if trying to find her other mark. Yeji laughs a bit at the question.

“I mean, I was only born with one. I will only have one mark my whole life.”

“There are people like that? What does it mean?” Renjun asks, stirring the melting ice in his drink with his straw.

“It means that your soulmate is also the person who will hurt you the most in life.” Yeji’s sharp eyes glance over to Jaemin, “That’s why I rejected you so quickly. I’m sorry if I caused you pain. I was just young and only thinking about myself.” She explains.

“No, I understand. I think I would’ve done the same thing.” Jaemin nods, and the two of them fix their eyes down and away from each other, Jaemin now knowing the reason for their separation makes him think about the decisions he made over the past few years.

Haechan, however, starts thinking about you. His palms get clammy and his heart beats faster, his mind running through the years and years of memories he has of you.

Where is your second mark?

Has it just been so long that Haechan doesn’t remember anymore, or did he never see it in the first place? Could it be… that you’re like Yeji? One mark, destined to be hurt the most by the person who’s supposed to love you the most. Haechan feels sick. It can’t be.

“It’s rare, right? For people to be born with one mark?” Haechan asks Yeji, and she purses her lips.

“Not really, no. Most people just don’t admit it out loud, since it’s not the norm to only have one mark. If you think about it, the people you love have the most power to hurt you. It’s not that uncommon.” She shrugs, and the table settles into another silence as the three guys think about her words.

Haechan refuses to believe it. You told him everything, you trusted him to the very end. You would’ve told him if you only had one mark, right? On the other hand, Haechan cannot remember ever seeing a second mark on your body— ever.

He begins to feel pain, for you and for what you must’ve gone through while you were with Haechan if this is true. He also begins to feel fear. Fear that his actions in the past are the end-all, be-all to your relationship. Haechan always had hope that you two might be able to work out your problems in the future, until now.

Haechan really hopes he’s wrong. He really hopes there’s a chance, a small sliver of promise of a future left for the two of you.

“Oh, hey, you got here quick.” You say as you open the door, Mya stepping in through the threshold and into your home. “I’m sorry we had to change plans so quickly. It’s just Mirae got a fever and wouldn’t stop crying…” You trail off as you lead your friend into the kitchen.

“It’s alright, I understand.” Mya smiles, watching you pull two mugs out of your cabinet and pour hot water, the savory aroma of coffee immediately filling the room. Mya takes a good look at you; you have some hair falling out of your ponytail around your face, there’s some sort of stain on your sweater, and you can’t stop playing with the diamond ring on your left hand; you look just like any new mom would.

“So, what’s going on? You don’t usually call me up like this out of nowhere…” You ask once you sit down, mugs on the table between you and your old friend. During your college days, you guys got to be pretty close, but after you graduated it became harder to get in touch due to your busy lives.

“Well, you remember Renjun, right?” Mya begins, nervously sipping on her coffee. You pretend to not notice how her hands shake.

“Of course,” You smile at the memory of Mya and Renjun, “Are you guys doing good?” At the question, Mya sets down her mug and stares into the creamer that swirls through the coffee, her shoulders sagging and eyes dull.

“I think… he’s going to propose to me.” You freeze, your heart suddenly beginning to hammer in your chest. Not because you’re excited by the news, but because your friend looks miserable.

“Why does the look on your face say that’s a bad thing?” Your heart begins to break when Mya lifts her head to show the tears surfacing to the edge of her eyes. You reach your hand over the table to capture Mya’s, trying to comfort her in any way.

“You know you can tell me anything. I won’t judge.” You nudge her to open up. After a moment, she takes a deep breath and squeezes your hand.

“I don’t think I’m Renjun’s soulmate. I think… I’m the opposite.” She admits, biting into her bottom lip. “I think I fell out of love. Soulmates can’t do that, right?” When you shake your head, she sighs and continues, “I think it happened a while ago actually, but I was too afraid to say anything because I still care about him, like a friend. We share a mark, so it could mean I’m the one who’s meant to hurt him the most, but, this is going to sound insane…” She lets some tears fall down her cheeks as she talks, and you can only grip her hand tighter to encourage her to speak.

“I don’t want to. I think I’m supposed to hurt him, but I don’t want to— not at all. How does any of this make sense?” The tears start to fall as she thinks more and more about the situation, why did fate have to be so unfair to her?

You always thought about how unfair it is that there’s going to be a person who hurts you and gets to walk away from the situation without a care. When it comes to Mya and your own story of how you got hurt, you realize hurt is a two way street sometimes. It’s not always malicious and spiteful, hurt can be just as much of a shared emotion as love.

“Hey, everything happens for a reason. Even if it hurts, it’s supposed to hurt for a reason. Or else, why would fate exist in the first place?” You’re not sure if these are the most comforting words you can give Mya at the moment, but she finds some comfort in your logic and nods her head.

“I should go talk to him, shouldn’t I?” When you nod your head, Mya sighs. She dreads having this conversation, even thinking about it makes her scared of how Renjun will react.

“When you have your thoughts in order, go to him and tell him how you feel. No matter what kind of relationship fate assigns you, it doesn’t take away all the time you spent together. It’ll be okay.”

Mya has a lot on her mind as she stands up and makes her way to your door, denying your request of walking her home or calling a cab. As she slides her shoes on, the bedroom door opens and closes quietly. Mya smiles at the man who walks up to you, some bags under his eyes and his light brown hair tousled, not surprising Mya the slightest.

“Is she okay?” You ask as he comes forward, worry lacing your words. The man nods and lovingly pats your head, telling you not to worry before turning to Mya.

“Hey, sorry I didn’t come out earlier to say hi, Mirae was sleeping on me and I didn’t want to wake her up.” He explains while his arm comes around your shoulders and he tiredly sets his chin against your head.

“It’s okay, Xiaojun, I’m the one who intruded. You guys should focus on Mirae, and maybe get some sleep.” Mya manages to smile as she glances at her phone, a message from Renjun reading “Where are you? Come home, I miss you” making her nerves from earlier arise.

“We’ll try,” You comment, “And hey, call me anytime. I’ll always be here for you.” Mya nods, sending a wave and walking out of the front door to walk the long way home. When the door closes, Xiaojun sighs and moves his head to your shoulder, snaking his other arm around your waist to pull you closer to him.

“Y/N… I’m so tired.” He whines, laughing through his words a bit. It sends chills down your spine when his lips brush against your bare skin and his breath tickles your neck. You tug on his shirt, pulling him closer and resting your head against him.

“That’s what happens when a baby is sick.” You sigh, and Xiaojun can already guess the question that’s about to leave your lips. “You don’t regret this, do you?”

Around the same time that Donghyuck left you, Xiaojun found his soulmate. She came into Xiaojun’s life as quickly as she left it, something about backpacking through Central America. Not sharing the same goals and dreams as his soulmate, it left Xiaojun heart broken and lost without the person who’s supposed to be his home.

He needed someone and you needed someone, too. And then it turned from needing the other’s presence to understanding each other in a different way than friends do, and then you realized… You’re in love.

When he decided to love Mirae as if she’s his own, that’s when you knew Xiaojun is the right choice for you. However, that didn’t stop you from wondering if Xiaojun ever regrets his decision.

“You ask that question all the time,” He leans back, his gentle hands cupping your jaw as you make eye contact, “You know I’ll always answer the same way. I never regret picking you.”

Xiaojun waits for the anxiety to leave your eyes before giving you a smile, brushing his thumb over your soft cheek. He wonders how he hasn’t fallen in love with you sooner, you being his childhood friend and all. He knows it’s probably because he has always been waiting for his soulmate and it blinded him from seeing the one he truly loves: you.

When he feels you fully relax into him, he leans in and softly presses his lips to yours. You melt into him instantly, letting him hold onto you as his lips move slowly against yours. The hand on your waist pulls you closer and you hear Xiaojun whine when your nails scratch on his back over his shirt.

You pull away before anything else can happen, and Xiaojun stares back at you with a pout that makes you giggle a bit.

“Maybe we really should go to sleep?” You ask, and Xiaojun nods. He takes one more look at you, that look full of adoration that always makes your heart jump and your face heat up no matter what, and then he leads you to your bedroom for, hopefully, a restful night of sleep.

The next time you hear from Mya, it’s when you’re walking home from work one evening.

Your phone rings loudly and kills whatever train of thought you were on, pulling you to your electronic device and pressing the answer button.

“Hey, hun, what’s up?” You hum into the phone, stepping over cracks in the sidewalk.

“I think it’s today. I think Renjun is going to propose to me today.” Her words make you stop in your tracks, making some people around you throw a glare at the sudden obstacle in the middle of the sidewalk.

“What? What happened?” You ask.

“He just called me and told me to go to campus, to the bell tower. I just know he’s going to propose.” You can hear the panicky tone rising in Mya’s voice and you feel her anxiety all the way through the phone.

“Didn’t you talk to him about it?” You try to make sense of the situation.

“I was going to when I planned out what I needed to say, but I’m not ready yet. Oh, my god, I can’t go see him. I can’t.” You can practically hear her shaking her head by the sound of her wavering voice. “Please, Y/N, help me. I don’t know what to do.”

“Mya, it’ll be okay. I’ll meet you in the front of the campus and we’ll go in together, okay?” You turn around abruptly, already planning the quickest way to get to the university in your head.

“Wait, what? I just said I can’t go there.”

“Think about it, if you don’t show up then Renjun will know something is wrong and bring it up first. If you do show up, then you can say what you need to first before anything else happens.” You explain as you weave through people on the sidewalk going home. “I don’t think you should drag this out any longer.”

“... Okay, okay, I’ll meet you there.” After saying goodbyes, you end the phone call and send a text to Xiaojun telling him you’ll be late tonight and saying you’ll explain later. You put your phone into your bag and quickly make your way to campus, playing with the ring on your finger out of worry for Mya.

When you arrive, Mya is already at the front gates, pacing back and forth as college students pass by and send her glances. You walk up to her, scooping her arm into yours and looping them together, calmly walking onto campus and towards the bell tower. You clutch your bag closer to your side, thinking about the one place you want to visit before leaving tonight.

“Have you thought about what you’ll say?” You ask quietly, but your voice still startles Mya and she jumps a bit in your hold.

“I can’t even think straight right now, I have no idea.” She grips your arm tighter.

“I believe in you. One way or another, you and Renjun are connected somehow. I think you already know what you have to say.” You ponder out loud.

“How?”

“Because it’s your fate, even if it’s a bad one. Some things in life are hard, but that’s why we can say we live.” Mya doesn’t look any more relaxed at your words, and you don’t blame her.

After walking for some time, you reach the bell tower. You can already see a figure of someone standing underneath it. The sun is setting behind the clock, and when you walk closer, you can see balloons and some candles lighting up the dimming area. Right before you reach the tower, you stop and let go of Mya’s arm. Giving her one last look of reassurance, you gently push her to Renjun.

You don’t hear exactly what happens next, since you’re standing too far away. But if you had to guess, Renjun noticed Mya and greeted her with the flowers he was holding. For a split second, you felt deja vu. Back when you were just a college student, you saw this exact same scene through a video— same people and same proposal.

There was a point when Renjun’s face changed that you know Mya broke the news. He looked confused and agitated, but most of all hurt. True pain breaks over his face, you can even see it from where you’re standing. You’ve never seen someone hurt by the one who is fated to bring them pain until now. Renjun looks like he could crumble into the asphalt and roll away with the wind, and it would still hurt less than standing there, hearing the words of betrayal from the one he thought was his soulmate.

You sympathize with him. It’s almost like you can feel that same feeling, like muscle memory in your heart forcing you to remember what it feels like to be hurt that way.

When Mya turns and walks away, you see the pain on her face too. When she passes you, she moves quicker than you and you aren’t able to stop her, only watching her walk towards the entrance of the campus.

You turn to look at Renjun, your heart seizing in surprise when you see two other familiar faces: Jaemin and Donghyuck.

He looks like he hasn’t changed one bit, but at the same time he isn’t who you remember. His hair is still that golden shade of brown, falling over his ears and down the back of his neck. His clothes look the same, his posture is still a bit hunched as always, but his eyes and his gaze look different as he stares back at you.

You aren’t sure why you’re still standing there, you don’t have anything to say to your three old college friends, so you politely nod at them and turn around, walking further into campus. You walk next to the buildings you used to know so well, your feet guiding you to the place your heart wants to go to the most.

You pull out your phone and start calling Mya. Once, twice, and after the third time, you send a text asking her to pick up the phone. There are so many places she could’ve gone, and you could probably catch up to her if you turn around and run, but your feet don’t listen to your brain and carry you to the place you’ve been yearning to see again since the second you stepped into campus.

The staircase looks the same as it did 5 years ago. You have changed, so has Donghyuck, but this staircase remains stagnant in time. The trees on the left side still sway over the stairs peacefully and the cracks in the stone wall on the right seem to not have changed either. You immediately feel comfort upon seeing this steep set of stairs, slowly starting to walk up while putting your phone into your bag.

One, two, three, four, the fifth step a little longer, then repeat.

When you reach the top, the air feels slightly cooler and you close your eyes for a moment. Not for too long, though, because you hear your name being called from the bottom of the staircase.

Donghyuck manages to catch your attention with his loud voice, his figure looking small. You stand in your spots for a bit longer, the sun setting behind the trees and the wind nipping at your nose. Until, suddenly, Donghyuck starts climbing the stairs.

One, two, three, four, every fifth stride a little longer, one hundred and nine times until he’s on the step right before yours, glancing at you through his hopeful eyes.

“I knew you would be here.” He’s slightly out of breath, but the cheekiness in his voice is still evident.

“I knew you would find me.” You say back, making him smile a bit, “But, I’m not sure what for. If it’s about what Mya did to Renjun, I don’t think that’s my place to explain.”

“No, there’s something I’m curious about. Actually, there’s so many things I want to know about you, but I have a feeling you won’t tell me everything I want to hear.” He bites his chapped lip, shoving his hands into the pockets of his oversized jacket. “Will you let me ask you a question?” The look on your face tells him to go on.

“Do you only have one mark?”

You cock an eyebrow, “It took you this long to figure out?”

He laughs, not out of humor but out of disbelief, and looks at his shoes. “I can’t believe it. All this time…” he mumbles and kicks the step he’s standing on. When he lifts his head to look at you, you’re surprised by the tears lining his eyes. “I’m so sorry.”

“For what?” Your heart still hurts to see him in pain, even after everything, your soulmate connection is still strong.

“For hurting you. You knew what would happen all along, you knew how we would end up, but you still stayed with me. I’m so sorry that I couldn’t do anything to save us.” He sniffs, one tear falling down his eye. He tries to wipe it away quickly, but you still see it. Something in you pulls you towards him, something telling you to comfort him, but you hold back.

“It doesn’t matter anymore. It’s in the past now.” You bite your lip in thought as he nods, “Where did you find out about single-marked people?”

“I ran into an old classmate. When she explained it, I realized it sounded just like what happened to us—”

“What you did to me.” You quickly correct him, making the pain on his face fade away and a cold look present itself on his features.

“Hey, I know you understand why I did what I did.” He rebuttals.

“Just because I understand doesn’t mean I’ll forgive and forget.” You taunt back, feeling anger and irritation rise. You decide now is the time to walk away, talking the first step down the stairs where Donghyuck is standing. He stops you with a strong grasp on your left wrist, turning you to him and looking you straight in the eye.

“One more question. Whose ring is this?” He holds up your left hand to his face, eyeing the diamond that shines as he tilts your hand back and forth. His thumb rolls over the dragonfly that paints your hand, his identical mark peeking out of his sleeve and touching yours as he examines the ring.

“Xiaojun gave it to me.” Donghyuck flinches at the name, looking between you and your hand.

“Xiaojun…” He repeats, the name feeling heavy on his tongue, “Good. He’s a good guy.” You can tell how hard it is for him to get those words out of his mouth, as if he’s saying the words out loud to convince himself rather than just commenting. You gently try to take your hand away, but Donghyuck grips onto it more, dropping your hands down between you two.

“Wait, one more question.”

You sigh restlessly, “You said that about the last question.”

“No, seriously, this is the last one.” You pause for a moment to compose yourself before nodding slowly, signaling him to go ahead and ask.

“Will you ever be able to do it? To forgive me, and to forget what I did?” His voice holds so much hope you’re almost afraid of talking, since you know your words will break whatever last piece of expectation he has left. You gently take his hand, stepping closer to him to slide it into his jacket pocket. You wipe some pollen off of his shoulder, looking him in the eyes afterwards.

“One day, when we’ve found our place in this world and the pain we gave each other is just a distant memory, I will forgive you. But I’ll never be able to forget how you left me when I needed you most. In this world where love is chosen for you, I turned my back on fate and I chose love. It’ll never be the same as when I was with you, but that’s not what I need. I need someone who will love me— someone who will stay when things go good or bad. Someone who will stay for life.” You explain, “And actually, I’ll start forgiving you now.”

You dig into your bag, finding your wallet and producing a photo from one of the slots that’s supposed to be for a card.

“This is Mirae. I can already tell she’s going to have your eyes and your hair when she grows older,” You can’t help but smile, watching Donghyuck’s every emotion as they move through his face. Surprise, fondness, instant love. “We’re always going to be tied together from now on. Not because of this,” You point to the dragonfly that’s imprinted on his hand, “But because of her.” You point to the picture that he’s gripping tightly.

Donghyuck looks at the photo for what seems like hours. The little girl in the photo is laughing at someone behind the camera, holding a rubber duck in her small hands. She's a perfect mixture between you and Donghyuck, and you’re right, she does have his eyes.

Donghyuck has never felt this much regret in his whole life.

“I have to go,” You say, pulling out your phone when you hear it buzz in your bag to see Mya calling you, “But don’t be a stranger. I never changed my phone number.” And with that, you walk down the stairs. When you get to the bottom, Donghyuck watches you turn and wave to him before disappearing behind the stone wall.

He grips the picture in his hand, not able to look away from his daughter who stares back at him with the same eyes. The sunset has ended and Donghyuck eventually makes the slow walk back down the stairs to find Renjun and Jaemin.

He keeps looking at the picture the entire walk back, thinking about the choices he made when he was younger. He realized he cared a lot about what his marks made him; the sunflower on his knee made him a stranger to his father, and the dragonfly on his left hand made him a stranger to his daughter.

Even though he thought he took the cautionary steps, in the end, he ended up exactly the way he never wanted to be— like his dad

The marks on bodies help guide people to their fate, but there is more to life than fate. Sometimes, you have to take destiny by the reigns and pull it your way. And with this picture— with this new chance to begin again, Donghyuck will do just that.

#haechan #nct dream au #nct fluff #nct angst #nct dream fluff #nct dream angst #nct scenario #nct imagine #nct blurb #nct fic #nct dream fic #nct dream scenarios #nct dream imagines #nct dream blurbs #00 line #dreamies

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shadow-sovereign · 3 years

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Hello, it's Lullaby again. An idea quite similar to Time traveling Shadows, but it's either Jin-woo as a Shadow Monarch or The Shadow Monarch himself. As in Ashborn is Jin-woo and he is often time hopping. I mean, what if original Jin-woo in a timeline way before canon got trapped in one of his earliest dungeons and got yeeted right to the Supreme Being's throne room at the ripe age of 20?

"... at the ripe age of 20?" it certainly would explain his loyalty to the Being if he was treated kindly and trained to be one of the Being's generals, as he maybe was led to believe. So he underwent an endless cycle of giving his power to his past self in order to keep him (the younger him) in the Human world but until canonverse it was all a failure.

Huh, this is an interesting concept. Lots of time wimey shenanigans.

It’s an au where the Rulers tried to give the humans magic in the earlier timelines (which must be driving them crazy that they keep losing, since in canon that was their last ditch effort to keep some of the humans alive). That does make me wonder what else they would have tried, though. Maybe different National Ranked Hunters in each timeline.

So, Jin-Woo of the first timeline ends up in front of the Supreme Being (also called the Absolute Being, at least that’s the translation I read), I guess far in the past, since we don’t know when exactly the Rulers turned against their creator.

Jin-Woo is amazed that such a powerful being sees potential in him, making him so much more powerful. Making him practically a god, really, especially after he dies and becomes the Shadow Monarch.

He’s a very loyal person, perhaps he even started to see the Absolute Being as a second father. With the time travel and everything, he would have known the AB a lot longer than his mortal dad. It would have made the AB’s death hit him a lot harder, feeling like he’s lost another parent. Then the conflicted feelings of why the Rulers killed the AB.

Jin-Woo isn’t naive. He understands the Ruler’s argument for how the AB is using their fight with the Monarchs as entertainment. So, he has to wrestle with his own feelings of loyalty, love, and betrayal. On two fronts, really, since he would have grown close to the Rulers as well.

A part of him would know that the Rulers just killed the AB to save lives, both of themselves and of their subordinates. But that doesn’t take away the pain of losing his father-figure.

When the time travel stuff happens, the Rulers trying to save the Earth, he sees his other self and wants to spare him the same pain. And perhaps give himself a chance to rest, to erase this version of himself and replace it with one who hasn’t known the same loss.

And so, he keeps trying to give his powers to these other versions of himself, but it’s a delicate balance, trying to give a human so much power. If he takes too long, young Jin-Woo won’t get the full power up before the Monarchs arrive and die that way. But if he gives him the power too fast, it will...probably disintegrate him. That seems to be what happened to Il-Hwan, too much of the Ruler’s power at once.

Also, maybe sometimes young Jin-Woo just gets killed before he can fully inherit the Shadow Monarch’s powers. With all those dangerous dungeons he goes on and maybe even acquiring the ire of Hwang Dong-Su before he’s leveled up enough. There are a lot of factors that could get him killed.

But over the resets, SM Jin-Woo figures out a game plan for how to level him up, creating those fake dungeons for him to train in. And at least in the fake dungeons, he’d be able to stop any of those created monsters from killing young Jin-Woo if something went wrong.

And you know, once the two Jin-Woo’s meet, that speech will be a lot more literal. The ‘I am you and You are me’ and ‘I’m the record of your struggles’ thing. Much more literal. [I don’t remember the exact wording of that speech, but that was the gist of it.]

After that, I think things would happen pretty similar to canon. Young Jin-Woo becomes the new Shadow Monarch, fights Antares, goes back in time, defeats the Monarchs. But perhaps this time, the Rulers would be more involved in his life when everything is said and done. Because in this case, the “Ashborn” they had known was just an older Jin-Woo. Now, they want to get to know this younger Jin-Woo, without all the bad history between them.

This Jin-Woo is more objective than his other self, having never met the Absolute Being, so he doesn’t feel the same sense of betrayal from the Rulers killing the Absolute Being. He knows the guy needed to die, if there was ever going to be an end to the fighting.

He’s not sure what to think of the Rulers, since they’re attached to a version of him that’s...not quite him. They get surprised by what he does sometimes while other actions are completely inline with what they’d expect. It makes for a rather unique getting to know you experience.

I imagine he’d really start to warm up to them once the Rulers started to interact with his human family. Maybe they have an attitude of any family of Jin-Woo’s is a family of theirs. So, they treat Jin-Woo’s family well, not even doing it to endear themselves to Jin-Woo, which makes it that more effective.

Perhaps he and Jin-Ah would start to see the Rulers as Aunts and Uncles. They could show Jin-Woo how to use more of his abilities and to grant his human family longer life. And they’d all fight to babysit when Jin-Woo or Jin-Ah has kids.

And they all live happily ever after. Because I like happy endings.

#Solo Leveling #Lullaby #fic ideas #fic ideas submission #JinWoo is Ashborn au

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atinymonster · 3 years

Text

connected pinkies

ateez 9th member.

jiyu and jiyong catch up after a while, but little did she know it would spark a huge storm.

can you guess what happens next? D;

➴ taglist: @banhmi07, @jiyeons-closet, @jaeminpeachy, @mochibabycakes, @euphoriamingi

➴ masterlist

"Is that him?”

At the manager’s question, Jiyu followed his gaze to see a familiar, slender male wearing a black bucket hat and a mask waiting in front of the cafe. Her eyes lit up before nodding enthusiastically.

Chuckling at her restlessness to meet him, the manager unlocked the car door. “Remember, be careful out there!” he quickly reminded.

Ever since ATEEZ’s popularity started to grow, he’s been aware of the many fans that won’t hesitate to approach or crowd them in public. He’s seen it happen to Jiyu once, and it wasn’t a pretty sight.

“I will, thank you for driving me!” she smiled before closing the car door.

Looking left and right to make sure she wasn’t about to be run over by a car, she dashed across the street towards the man. “Jiyong!”

At the sound of his name, the man looked up from his phone and a huge smile broke out onto his face underneath the mask. Opening his arms, he grunted at the impact when Jiyu crashed into his embrace and hugged him back.

“If it isn’t my lovely little sister,” he smiled, taking off her bucket hat and ruffling her hair. “Look we match today,” he teased, gesturing to their matching bucket hats and masks.

It’s been a while since the last time Jiyu and Jiyong met, considering how busy the both of them had been. If one had a break from their schedules, the other would be busy, making it difficult for them to meet since the new year started.

“Have you been watching our Kingdom performances?” Jiyu eagerly asked after they settled in a corner booth of the cafe.

“Of course! I keep up with all of your schedules, you know,” he proudly puffed his chest. “I didn’t know my little sister was so talented, I thought my bones were going to break after watching you dance each time. And I was the one that felt out of breath, too.”

“What, did you cheer for us too hard that you ran out of breath?” she snorted, sipping on the strawberry latte the waiter had brought over a few minutes prior. “You’re really getting old, if that’s the case.”

“I’m only five years older than you, and one year older than Seonghwa and Hongjoong,” he rolled his eyes, but he couldn’t help but scoff at his sister’s playfulness. He had to admit, he missed it.

“You know, I send your performance videos to năinai and yéyé.”

Jiyu tensed at the mention of her grandparents back in Guangzhou. Ever since she left to become a trainee, she hasn’t contacted them since, too afraid to hear what they had to say. She’s always carried around the guilt of taking their son away from the world, hence she thought minimizing her contact with them would be better for both parties.

“What do they say?” she quietly mumbled, twisting the straw around her drink. Whether it be demeaning comments, she decided to accept them.

Contrary to what she was expecting to hear, Jiyong slid his phone across the table towards her. “Here, you can read them yourself.”

Jiyong wouldn’t have her read hurtful comments, she knew that and she trusted him. But it still sent a wave of nervousness when she hesitantly picked up his phone and started scrolling through the messages.

The latest videos Jiyong had sent them were her fancams of both performances from round three of Kingdom. Taking a deep breath, she scrolled down to see her grandparents’ response, bracing herself in case she read something unpleasant.

But there were no demeaning responses. Only responses praising her talents and cheering her on.

[năinai] Little Jiyu is all grown up now

[yéyé] Gosh, look at her energy! It makes my own bones hurt just watching!

[năinai] I wish she’d call us, but I suppose we made it a little awkward for her...

[năinai] Jiyong dear, if you get the chance to, let her know that she’s free to call us anytime

[yéyé] Just keep the time zone in mind, though ;)

[jiyong] Haha! Will do!

She didn’t know how to react upon reading their heartwarming messages. They were, quite honestly, really unexpected for her, and the impact hit harder since it was around the time of her parents’ death anniversary.

“See? They don’t blame you one bit,” Jiyong reassured, reaching over the the table to pat her head. “You can save their numbers onto your phone if you want.”

Silently nodding, she took out her phone and began inputing their numbers, all while feeling a small lump in her throat, realizing that all these years, she had been avoiding them for no apparent reason.

They still loved her, but she was too scared for herself that she didn’t consider how they felt.

“Thanks,” she mumbled, handing him his phone back. “I guess I needed that wake up call.”

Jiyong chuckled before throwing her a knowing smirk. “Just be glad I didn’t send them your dating articles with Sunwoo.”

A small gasp left her lips at the realization. “Ah–”

That’s right. She never told Jiyong about her relationship.

Jiyong had to find out about his sister’s new love life through Dispatch articles, rather than his own sister telling him herself.

Avoiding his smug look, she resorted to looking out the window. His angelic smile looked far from innocent, looking more menacing if anything.

Knowing she was in for a barrage of questions, she made herself comfortable in the booth. “Alright, have at it, but keep it down so we don’t get caught.”

Jiyong wasted no time, leaning forwards on the table with curious eyes before firing off questions at rapid speed.

“How did you meet him?”

“We had a Weekly Idol shoot together back in 2019.”

“Who made the first move?”

“I guess he did...?”

“How long have you two been actually dating?”

“Since our Inception comeback.”

“And why didn’t it cross your mind to tell me?”

Jiyu was at a loss for an answer. “...That’s a good question.”

Jiyong’s face morphed into one of a kicked puppy. “Hey! That’s just mean, how do you forget to tell your own brother?!”

“It slipped my mind since I got so busy with the comeback, and I thought I told you but I guess I didn’t in reality,” she sheepishly answered, scratching the back of her neck.

Leaning back into his seat, he dejectedly crossed his arms like a child throwing a tantrum. “Fine, I guess I’ll forgive you,” he pouted his lips.

“You love me too much,” she sang, giving him her best aegyo performance, but only bursted into laughter when he started cringing.

He faked a gag. “Never do that again for the sake of you and I.”

“I know, that felt terrible,” she couldn’t help but agree.

“Jokes aside, I hope he makes you happy. And if he makes you cry, let me know, you hear?” Jiyong said, his brotherly protectiveness seeping into his tone.

Jiyu nodded with a hearty chuckle. “Yes, yes, I will.”

“But how’s modeling? I swear you got skinnier the last time I saw you,” she frowned upon seeing how baggy and loose his clothes seemed on him. “Are you eating?”

“Funny how you’re the one breaking your back for these performances and you’re worrying about me,” he joked, hoping to ease her worry. “But I’ve been eating my meals, don’t worry. I just went on a diet—”

“What diet? You’re already skin and bones as it is,” she pointed out. She knew being a model was difficult, but she never realized just how much effort it takes for a model to take care of themselves.

And when it comes to ESteem, a branch under SM Entertainment, she knew how strict things were.

“I’ll be okay, Ji, don’t worry!” he smiled, “I should be asking you about your eating and sleeping habits.”

“Seonghwa makes sure I eat at least two meals a day and that I’m in bed as soon as possible, I think I’m more inclined to worry about you.”

An airy and defeated huff sounded from the man. He knew she was right, she had eight people to look after her, while he was out at castings all day and lived by himself. It was a relieving thought—his sister was well-taken care of when he wasn’t around.

“Fair enough,” he said, raising his hands in mock surrender, “But seriously, I’m okay. I won’t work myself to exhaustion.”

“Promise?” she stuck her pinky out, a worried pout on her lips.

Jiyong intertwined his pinky with her’s, mumbling his promise with a soft smile.

Too engrossed in their bonding time, little did they know someone had spotted them from across the street while he was on his way to buy drinks for his members as punishment for losing a game of rock-paper-scissors.

And his face and heart fell when he saw the familiar white bracelet on the girl’s wrist, but her pinky was connected with another man’s while she adoringly smiled at him, the man mirroring her expression.

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