Is it realistic for Eli to have made the hawk “mask” overnight ?

No. The show portrays this “transition” or mask as something the Eli created “overnight” at first glance but if you watch closely there are still quite a few instances where Eli is clearly uncomfortable with “Hawk”. Sometimes an autistic person might start something we call mimicking to fit into a drastically new situation, in this case Eli really wanted to be friends, good friends with Miguel and he wanted the protection and power that Miguel had. So he mimicks both Miguel and Johnny (particularly Johnny quite a lot!). Mimicking is the base to any autistic mask.

Some examples of mimicking and masking

•the way Hawk speaks about women and “nerd shit” none of these things are his own opinions or thoughts it’s obviously regurgitated from Johnny. We especially see this when Demetri clocks what Hawk is saying as insane/ridiculous at the park and they have a little moment over it.

•his fighting style in the beginning it’s incredibly similar to Miguel’s, his desire to get a girlfriend, randomly gets with Moon at the first big party is quite FULL on with her too. (Something Miguel did with Sam, Miguel did it more  eloquently).

•mimicking Johnny’s literal face, Johnny teaches them all a style of fighting but Hawk really mimicks it so hardcore it’s almost laughable. Be tough strike hard, no pussies, the fucking back tattoo and that ridiculous movement he does with it (notice how that little move fades over time).

•how genuinely confused he is very frequently

•citting the situation after the  tournament Johnny says “yes Robby is my son but that has nothing to do with how I run my dojo” and Miguel replies “yes  sensei” and Eli is confused “but but”. Miguel clearly understands there are deeper issues going on here but Hawk is just upset because he doesn’t understand. Hawk almost always looks at people to gauge reaction (which is very common with ASD) and see how he in turn should react.

•it can be difficult to mask and mimick around people who know your autistic self well, we see this frequently between Demetri and Hawk. I’d say Hawk almost always drops the Hawk mask even for a moment whenever he’s with Demetri or gets triggered and becomes incredibly upset (be Demetri being a safe person he’s lost is very difficult)

If this was a genuine personality change Eli wouldn’t feel the INCREASING guilt he has over the Demetri arm situation citting the beating up of his team mates at Daniels house (also sometimes we as autistic people will do a gesture vs use words and I think that contributes to the forgiveness scene between Demetri and Eli). Also he drops the mask when Kyler joins the Dojo because he triggers Eli.

Anyways this is my explanation of the mask “Hawk” I’ve gotten a lot of messages about it and just picked this one to answer.

they’re in my brain and they refuse to leave :/

idk why i never posted this one lmao

literally just gonna leave this here to see how many of you actually like this

Different but Same

Choi Woo Shik - Vogue Korea

#done

Learning that Dash & Lily belongs to a trilogy, so there are two more books

Our Beloved Summer, episode 2

I find Dami and Wooshik as a great match and I know they have worked together before. It seems like they have a genuine friendship which pays off in their acting. We are two episodes in and I am hooked. More hooked than I was with Hometown Cha-Cha-Cha and we know that was a lot.

It such a great move to use the first ten minutes or so of the episode to show and explain their past relationship and how it led up to their breakup. We saw how sweet their relationship was and that they liked each other very much even though they still bickered. But we also learn that Yeonsoo feels like something is missing. What is missing are the important and sentimental words. Yeonsoo kept asking Woong what-if questions where Woong saw it as her way to tease him because she loved seeing him suffer (feel jealous, worried etc.) But in reality, she just wanted him to express his feelings and Woong has a hard time expressing them. Their love language must be different. Yeonsoo’s love language is words of affirmation and Woong’s is quality time. It was sad to see Woong still being upset about how their relationship ended. He probably does not know what bothered her in their past relationship, but I will bet you that Yeonsoo did not express her love either. It was a bit heartless for Yeonsoo to meet up after five years and it only being because of work. I understand why Woong is disappointed in her.

Can we talk about that elevator scene! “Was work the only excuse for you to come see me?” - Woong. Yeonsoo has always been determined and still is. Wong may have occasionally felt used or over looked. “Then what excuse did you expect to hear when you saw me?” - Yeonsoo. Yeonsoo is still waiting for him to be serious and confess. He has always acted and appeared childish. Can I just add two things.

One. I am in love with their families. Yeonsoo’s grandmother and Woong’s parents. They are straight copies of them.

Two. Is Jiwoong in love with Woong?

How should I put it? He never said the most important thing. OUR BELOVED SUMMER (2021) dir. Kim Yoon Jin

the best part about slow-build romance is the subtlety. give me not looking at each other while the backs of their hands are touching. give me unexplained heavy glances across the room. give me looking at the other’s lips and then looking away. give me the brush of fingers on an arm while walking by. 

#fond

#you tried

“Have you followed us!?”

holiness & love in soljiwan

i have been sitting on these thoughts for quite some time so here we goooooo

EXHIBIT A:

i think we all noticed this, like i had suspected a religious connection for a while but my suspicion was solidified in this scene where Sol confesses to Jiwan about liking her all the while wearing a necklace with a cross on it.

i feel like this scene is enormously significant as well. because all the while Sol is being honest about her feelings, confessing that she "likes Jiwan. and not just as friends.", she is wearing a cross upon her neck. like a dead albatross of catholic guilt. It's a powerful scene in that she fights the norms of not only a heteronormative society but in the face of an extremely heteronormative religion as well when she communicates genuinely w Jiwan about her own feelings that she has held down so long. The bravery it takes for not only Sol to say those words. And also for Jiwan to reciprocate them, with "I meant what I said last night. I cannot apologize for that. But where we go from here, i am not sure." The fact that both of these girls are able to face their feelings, and each other in the presence of this precariously placed cross of catholic guilt speaks LEAGUES for how much thought went into the filming of this scene and adds significant layers into this already nuanced sapphic relationship.

now, moving onto the BEST part that already happened under our noses and we didn't notice bc kdramas have this one extreme skill and that is poetry in subtlety. Here,

EXHIBIT B:

there is this scene early on in the show, where Jiwan touches Sol's brow and we see Sol visibly space out for a second at the tenderness of Jiwan's touch on her face.

the way this scene is framed, we can see a burst of yellow light centered in the space between Sol's face and Jiwan's hand where she touches Sol's brow. The yellow light is highly reminiscent of sunlight spilling through stained glass windows in churches. And in this context, it frames Jiwan's touch as that of a Saint's. It frames Sol's feelings for Jiwan as that of a devotee, feeling God for the first time. Even though she has repressed her feelings for Jiwan for a long time and is careful with it, here it is apparent that Jiwan's touch clearly affects Sol. and the way it affects her, the fact that she is has been in love with Jiwan for a long time, it paints Sol's acknowledgement of this love she holds for Jiwan as something akin to enlightenment. This scene paints a woman's sapphic feelings for her best friend, another woman... as something beautiful. dreamlike. holy.

i love subversions like these. where love, especially lgbtq+ love, in the face of fierce religious constraints, is portrayed as a religion in itself. Where looking upon your lovers face is a worship like no other, where there is no sweeter innocence than our gentle sin. i feel like it's such a powerful, subtle but powerful message in the face of oppressive catholic guilt.